What's up, bitches, I am back! You thought I gave up? Hell, no; I'm too stubborn to die! AHAHAHAHAHAHA! Ahem… this is a story I've been working on for some time, now, with the help of Spyash2. If you like this, head on over to his profile to show him some love.

I will be working on my other stories as well, but I wanna get a nice backlog of chapters done before posting them, so I can update more regularly. It will also give me more time to revisit previous chapters and make changes so I don't have to go back and rewrite after they've been posted, as I'm sure that drove a lotta y'all on FF batty. Still, Twisted Bonds and Silver and Gold will be completed as soon as possible!

With that out of the way, let's get this bitch rolling!

Summary: A goddess released and his village under siege, Uzumaki Naruto tries his damnedest to repel the invaders. But, it is all for naught as he is cast into the void and banished by Kaguya - not only from his village, not only from his world, but his entire realm of existence - so that the siege can continue unabated. Now, in a world that is not his own, among pale-haired women with silver eyes and man-eating creatures, a chance encounter leads to a series of events that would eventually spark yet another war.

Genres: isekai, crossover, harem, hentai, porn with plot, action, and dark fantasy.

Warnings: Spoilers, Alternate Universe, Original Characters, Crossover, massive harem, lemons, Fem!Kyuu, fox-girl, monster girls, impregnation, foul language, dirty talk, angry sex, make-up sex, happy sex, Legal Lolis, lolicon (legal), age gap (legal), student-teacher shenanigans, defloration, sexual domination, violence, gore, character death, dark themes, adult themes, crude humor, lewd humor, my fucked up sense of humor, cutesy shit, and unabashed silliness.

Disclaimer: I do not, in any way, own Naruto or Claymore. This is a non-profit fanfic made solely for the sake of entertainment. Please support the official releases of these franchises.

Prologue: A Dreaded Return

Deep within the darkest corner of Amegakure no Sato, the hidden village of Rain Country, eight men and one woman stood in a circle around a young, teenage girl. She was beaten, bloody, and unconscious as she lay in the center of a massive array of arcane glyphs.

Despite her age, this girl was utter hell for her captors to get their hands on. Her name was Fuu, better known as the Destroyer after singlehandedly razing her village to the ground for how the denizens had treated her. A person with that kind of power would hell for anyone to capture alive, in all fairness… But, they managed; they had to, as this girl had something in her they sought—Choumei, the Nanabi, a massive insectoid demon that had been sealed into her at birth, ironically to protect the village from which she hailed, and they were here to extract the creature from her vessel. (1)

In perfect unison, those who surrounded her, known as the Akatsuki, performed a series of mystical hand gestures and cast an ancient technique passed down from generation to generation.

When they were finished, the nine captors all shouted in unison, "Kaguya's will be done!"

Fuu's eyes snapped open and she screamed in agony. An inconceivable pain wracking her very being as she felt something being torn out of her. A golden aura enveloped the girl, then it surged upwards and started to solidify. First to form were eight spider-like legs, followed by six insectoid wings. The head formed next, with four glowing, blood-red compound eyes and bearing a V-shaped crown of seven horns—the center one being that of a rhinoceros beetle. Its mandibles were long and jagged and the creature was a striking black and yellow in color. The last thing to form was her abdomen, bearing large spikes in the back and a wicked, barbed stinger. (2)

When the creature formed, the aura around Fuu vanished, so too did the light from her eyes. She was utterly still, now; the agonizing pain of Choumei's extraction proved too much for even her to bear as she died from shock.

As for the demon in question, she struggled with all her might, seemingly held in place by an unseen force. "You damn fools," she roared, her voice low, booming, and otherworldly, but still distinctly feminine. "You've doomed yourselves, your entire world and countless others! That thing cannot... be… released…"

Her cries of distress went ignored and faded away as she melted into a beam of golden light. The shining pillar shot up and reached the world's second moon, Usagi—the prison that Choumei and her brethren had been created to protect: the prison of a being that their father did everything in his power to keep locked away as far out of anyone's reach as he possibly could…

She had failed… They had failed... (3)

Meanwhile, unbeknownst to all beneath Usagi, the being contained within sensed her shackles weakening. Ever since the first time she'd felt this sensation, she'd been struggling with all her might; six times before this, each one being more substantial than the last, and finally she felt the walls crumble, the chains rust away, and the bars decay into nothing.

"Yeees!" A female voice cried out in euphoria. This surge of power, this weakening of her cage was the greatest of all; though it wasn't enough to free her outright, Kaguya, the Rabbit Goddess, former god-empress of this world… this entire realm of existence and a thousand others, knew that this prison was no longer strong enough to contain her! With a roar of exertion, she shattered the seal; tremors formed throughout the moon and it burst open as though it had been little more than an egg on the pavement.

In the center of it all a quaint, little butter churn floated languidly, before cracks formed in it, too, and a blood red light leaked out. One more container shattered and from the light came a woman. (4)

She was a tall, striking beauty with alabaster skin and, ruby lips, and long, flowing hair as white as snow. Her form was one of perfect symmetry with nary a blemish, her figure was a flawless hourglass with a generous bust, flaring hips, and not a single curve out of place. From her head sprouted long, backswept, ivory horns, resembling the ears of a rabbit to some. She had pale, lavender eyes, neatly trimmed eyebrows and in the center of her forehead was a third eye. It glowed a deep crimson, black rings around its pupil resembled ripples in a lake and comma-shaped dots in groups of three, occupied the three innermost rings in alternating, triangular patterns.

Kaguya looked down upon the world beneath her. Now... where was that remnant she'd left behind? She was sure it had been responsible for her release. Ah! There it is. With a smile, she floated on down toward it before stopping herself.

Unfortunately for the people below, the demonic goddess' release had some… nasty side-effects as the sudden lack of a nearby celestial body and the remnants thereof falling from the sky would undoubtedly combine to result in a very bad time for the civilizations below—particularly the coastal ones. It served them right for rebelling against her as far as she was concerned.

But, still… she didn't want to risk harming those loyal to her and knowingly letting an apocalyptic meteor shower rain hell upon everyone wouldn't exactly make for good optics. With that in mind, Kaguya sent those she could still reach flying away from the planet with a wave of her hand. Once that was out of the way, she floated down once more.

Kaguya frowned deeply on her way down. Where were all the sky cities? What became of her legions of sentinels that had once darkened the sky whilst on patrol? For how long had she been sealed away?!

This was… concerning.

Disregarding the thunder and lightning as she flew on by the storm clouds, Kaguya carried on and found herself staring at a cobbled together knot primitive architecture that seemingly dared to fancy itself a... settlement of some sort. She refused to call it a civilization. Nothing about this… mess was civilized. But, clearly, her allies were hidden within it, the poor dears. She couldn't imagine the utter horror of having to live in this soggy pile of garbage. Clearly, the former god-empress had some work to do. But, that was for later…

Finally descending to the nine who'd released her, uncaring of her nudity or the corpse, she raised an eyebrow at their attire—long, flowing, black robes with bell-shaped collars. They were decorated in red, cloud-like designs and the group all wore wicker hats to hide their features with one exception.

The man in question was one-half pitch black and one-half ghostly pale, split right down the middle in a vertical line. The man's hair was green and his eyes were gold in color, though the one in the black half of his face appeared as a solid, round dot. The reason he didn't bother with the hat was also clear as day: a pair of jagged leaves sprouted from his collarbone, forming what resembled a venus flytrap.

Kaguya knew right away that this was her remnant, Zetsu, even before he bowed to greet her.

"It has been too long… Mother."

Kaguya hummed thoughtfully. "A curious form you took," she commented. "But I suppose I shall learn why, soon enough," She stretched out her hand towards him and said, "now, return to me."

Just like that, the man seemed to melt into a cloud of black and white mist, his clothes falling to the ground with a wet plop. The cloud swirled around Kaguya's arms and appeared to have been absorbed into her very pores and then, Kaguya's glowing eye shined with ten times the force, right before fading back down.

"Oh…" Kaguya muttered, reeling from the flood of memories gained from her remnant. It had been ten-thousand years since she had been imprisoned?! She took a deep, calming breath, doing well to hide the seething, ungodly rage she felt towards the uppity, little shit who stuffed her into that fucking butter of all things. She turned to address the man she knew was the leader of this group—a man who went by Pein. "The Cult of Kaguya is it…? Well, I must say I'm flattered." (5)

"We are Akatsuki," he replied, "an organization recently absorbed into your ranks. We are responsible for freeing you and wish to aid in reestablishing your empire."

Kaguya smiled, a low chuckle emerging from her. Well, who was she to deny a nice, powerful group of volunteers the opportunity to serve her? "Good… in my weakened state, I could use the resources."

Powerful, though, she still may have been, the woman was but a shadow of her former self… at least until she recovered. Breaking from that seal was not an easy task. To make matters worse, that little upstart peasant who'd defeated her apparently hid away her Godstone... and the Eye of Gelel... and the Ryuumyaku was gone as well. But—though this situation would undoubtedly prove more than a little troublesome—Kaguya wasn't worried. She knew the might these people had at their beck and call and was well aware of this world's disharmony. It was but a matter of taking out the big fish first.

Even to this day, remnants of her mighty Gelel Empire still clung onto their existence. She'd have to reward them for that… But, first… (6)

"We should take this somewhere more… private," Kaguya suggested. "Shall we?"

"Of course, milady," Pein replied with a bow. "This way. I'll have a servant get you something to wear, as well."

Thus, we end the prologue.

Needless to say, I took full advantage of this being and AU, so there are quite a few changes being made here, lol. Sorry about those first three being so clumped up in the beginning. I shall try and keep that to a minimum.

1: My first change to the Naruto lore in this AU is Fuu the Destroyer; after having been abused and shunned by her village for too long, she snapped and razed it to the ground. I kinda like that idea. It shall pop up in many of my fanfics. =3

2: Someone please explain to me how Choumei can fly in canon with all her wings on her ass? It doesn't look bio-mechanically possible... and that's coming from a porn writer! If even I can spot an issue in that department, there's a problem. Needless to say, I gave her a makeover for the sake of believability. The rule of cool can only excuse so much, damn it!

3: So as to avoid awkward questions of how life as we know it could have possibly developed without a moon, I made a second one... and yes, I literally named it Rabbit. More on that later.

Also, yes: in this fic, the Bijuu were literally created to keep Kaguya from escaping by serving as the living keys to her prison; as long as even a third of them were still around, her seal was essentially unbreakable... and no, the Reibi doesn't exist in this version.

4: Ooh, would you look at that! A butter churn! Alright, you know those shadows on the moon? Here in America, we see a man's face. In Japan, they see a rabbit churning butter. Ootsutsuki Kaguya was actually inspired by the rabbit in the moon, at least to some extent. So I took that theme and ran with it.

Also, the Oostustuki Clan don't exist in this continuity and the Sage of Six Paths was not Kaguya's son. More on that later. Naruto is in no way related to her, either. Personally, I felt his 'breeding' took away from his character at the end, so we've done away with that, lol. Not much of a spoiler there, I'm sure, lol.

5: Yeah... this one's probably gonna be a long one, so strap in, bitches, and prepare for a rant!

Zetsu being singlehandedly responsible for all of history is bullshit. Even the most hardcore fans agree with me on this from what I've seen, and that is saying something. On top of that, well... he's the creation of what was essentially a goddess who ruled the world at one point! Why not have him start a cult or other religious movement?! I dunno about you, but I'm thinking the laughable twist at the end was nothing more than proof that Kaguya was pulled outta Kishimoto-San's ass at the last second.

My suspicion is that he said 'hold my beer' upon hearing too many people say he couldn't make a decent female character to save his life... and promptly faceplanted in a spectacular fashion.

Sooo... instead of that bullshit, we're taking the concept of Kaguya being the empress of the world and cranking that shit up to eleven.

Also, it goes without saying that I'm just skipping right on past the silliness with Obito and Madara and streamlining the lore by making Kaguya a far more fleshed out character.

6: Okay, there's a lot to unpack with this one, too, but I'll try to keep this a hell of a lot more brief than the last entry on this list...

Kaguya is the god-empress of the Gelel Empire, responsible for the creation of sky-cities, the sentinels, the Godstone, the Ryuumyaku, and the Eye of Gelel, among other things. This has some implications for the lore to say the least, but I shall let that be revealed naturally over the course of the story, lol.

Also, it's worth noting that Kaguya keeps regarding the Sage as a peasant for a reason: in her eyes, he was one—a lowly farm boy who took up arms against the Gelel Empire and started a revolution to end her regime.

Hope you enjoyed this and that you like what is to come! Have a good one, eh?