"What is your love life main struggle or question?"

If someone asked Alec Lightwood this question, Alec certainly will ask back the person one question.

That is…

"How many past relationships you have before the right person step into your life?"

In frankly, recently, Alec is really having a problem and struggle with Magnus's uncountable ex-relationships before him. That is an untold truth that he afraid to ask Magnus to get more in details. But at the same time, there is a conflict between the 'want to know more' and 'refuse to accept the reality' in Alec's heart.

That is something that Alec couldn't deny, he really wishes he can know more about Magnus. And, he also knows that he will only get hurt when he found out the truth. Maybe just like what Magnus had told him, the ex-relationships are nothing to him but just the figures. Even Magnus had a special feeling towards some his ex-lovers, but they are already become one part of his past history and never exist anymore in the future, which also means that Magnus's ex-lovers won't become the obstacles or any troubles that might affect Alec and Magnus's present and future relationship.

Magnus does not really want to reveal too much information to let Alec know. Actually, the biggest fear of Magnus is not what he worries that Alec will know too much about him, but Magnus is feeling scared that Alec might get hurt in the end. Magnus always knows that Alec is far too young and fewer experiences in love world. Furthermore, Alec is always a kind of thinking too much person, who has lots of rich imagination that about everything around him when he concerned for someone, like the High Warlock in Brooklyn, Magnus Bane, who is Alec's first ever lover.

That is a starry night in the pub. Romantic songs played around, but the atmosphere between the lovers not really can be considered as 'fine'.

"So… How many ex-lovers you have before I become your boyfriend?" Alec asked in hesitation when he first noticed that Magnus has some hidden truth that not yet revealed to him.

Magnus sits upright with an uneasy feeling in his stomach when he tries so hard to focus on what Alec had said to him.

"Why you want to know this…?" Magnus not really feeling this question will be a problem to him until Alec asked him.

"Curiousness." Alec shrugged and gazing at Magnus with a serious look. "I wish I can know more about your past, I want to know the real you, Magnus."

"What you know about me, the real me… Well, you already met me, Alexander. I mean, you already know the real me, this is the real me all the time!" Magnus gasped before he drinking and finished his beer quickly in a short moment.

"Are you thirsty?" Alec asked in confusion.

"Yeah." Magnus sighed heavily and he turns his head to Alec. "Can we just skip this question, please?"

"Why?" Alec asked again. "Why you want to change the subject? Is this a hard question to you?"

'YES! WHAT THE FUCK YOU WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THIS, ALEXANDER?' Magnus shout it out loud in his bottom heart. But, of course, Magnus never has the guts to speak all of this to Alec.

Magnus sighed again while he getting tired on Alec's unstoppable 'ex-lovers' related questions. Finally, what Magnus able to open his mouth and tell Alec is…

"Alexander, I love you and you love me. And, the most important thing is you are my boyfriend now. Therefore, I don't think the past relationship will become a problem for us, can you understand?" Magnus said.

Alec nodded his head. "I know, but still…"

"Since it isn't a problem anymore, why you want to keep asking this kind of questions? It's boring!" Magnus fake an uncomfortable smiling face to Alec, then he continues to say. "Alexander, please let us just enjoy this moment with fun, okay?"

It is very clear that Magnus is trying to hide something from him. Alec noticed this obviously and he feels his heart is getting heavier. Magnus never acted like this to avoid Alec for asking him a question before this. There must be something in Magnus's past life that Magnus doesn't want to let other people know, which Alec included.

Then, Alec sighed and nodded his head again.

Magnus is glad and feeling relieved that Alec finally stops to ask more question about his past.

"One more beer, please!" Magnus ordered the beer from the bartender and missed Alec's sad look. In fact, Magnus is keeping avoiding the eye-contact with Alec, which makes Magnus missed and do not really see what the real thoughts that Alec tried so hard to hide from Magnus.

Alec faked his happy smiles to Magnus for the rest of their conversation, however, Magnus not knowing this truth when he also tried to avoiding Alec at the same time. There is an awkward atmosphere between both of them, but they are hiding it so well by their faking laughing and talking moments.

Everything seems smooth, or not.

There is a silent moment between them after the end of another short random topic. Both of Alec and Magnus looked not really comfortable on this date. Tonight, what's keep repeating in their minds is the one and the only exact question that Alec asked and wanting to know the answer, but also is the question that Magnus is kept avoiding by many excuses.

"Magnus, I think I can accept it," Alec said suddenly without any opening remarks.

"What do you mean…?" Magnus begged from his bottom heart that Alec can forget out this soon. There is nothing more Magnus can tell him. No matter how Magnus tries to avoid, but in the end, Alec might be the one who gets hurt from the truth of answer.

"About your past relationships…" Alec takes a deep breath and asked again. "Please tell me, how many relationships you have been with before me?"

"Alexander…"

"Magnus, I want to know. Please!"

"You have no idea what the answer you are trying to reveal. Trust me, you won't like what you hear." Magnus tries so hard to convince Alec to give up this question again. But Alec is stubborn and refuse to listen to Magnus's advice.

"It's not only about you, Magnus. It's all about us! I want to get closer to you, I want to know how I can do better to be with you! I want to do better than them!" Alec shouted out loud with frustration.

"Alexander, you don't understand. You are good enough for me, nothing you need to make changes or compare yourself to the other person, especially not compare yourself to my ex-lovers!" Magnus also raises his voices uncontrollably.

Then, both of them sighed and remain silent for a long while.

After that, Magnus is the one who starts talking again.

"Alexander, please just drop this question."

"No. Never," Alec said in a firm tone.

Magnus looked defeated. "Alexander…"

"If you refuse to tell me who is them, then at least tell me the figures."

"There is nothing differences between their names and my ex-lovers' round figures." Magnus seems he is getting tired on this topic already. He wishes nothing but hope they can end this topic now.

"Since it doesn't have any big differences, then you can pick either one. Neither you want to tell me their names nor just a round figure." Alec glancing at Magnus with a serious look.

"You will certainly regret it, Alexander." Magnus gives his last try.

However, Alec still not feeling to give up so soon.

"Tell me the answer. Don't make me wait for too long, Magnus."

"Seventeen," Magnus said.

"Seventeen?" Alec looked surprises and an unknown smile appeared on his face. This answer is actually far from his estimation. He thought the answer will be a greater digit than this.

On the contrary, Magnus's worried face turn to an unbelievable confusion look when he noticed that his innocent young lover, Alec was actually believing that seventeen will be the final answer.

"Oh gosh…" Magnus bit his lips and trying so hard to reopen his mouth again. "Alexander, actually the actual figure is about seventeen…"

"I know," Alec said.

But Magnus added quickly this time. "Thousand."

"What?" Alec is totally in shock with his half-open mouth.

"It's seventeen thousand," Magnus said with the tremble lips, then he sighed and ducking his sight from Alec.

"You said that you can accept it, right?" Magnus asked in hesitation.

There is a long silent respond from Alec, which makes Magnus slowly go insane.

"Let's call it a day," Alec replies in a low emotionless tone.

New York Institute.

It's already late midnight time when Alec back to Shadowhunter institute. Alec had been rejected Magnus's invitation to stay overnight at Magnus's loft just now before they split apart at the pub. Alec thinks that he made the right choice since he noticed that Magnus seems to need some private space too tonight.

"Stupid Alec, where have you been just now? Why are you not answer the phone or reply to my messages? Don't you ever dare to do like this again! I am worried about you!" Jace asked eagerly when he walks faster towards Alec.

"I'm sorry." Alec apologized and explained in a soft tone. "I just having a date with Magnus, so I was switching off the phone."

Jace sighed. "Whatever, at least you are safe."

Observe Alec's sorrowful face for a while, Jace asked again. "Hey, are you okay? What's wrong with you?"

"What?"

"You looked like you are suffering from something bad."

"Am I…? Oh… Maybe. I just a little bit tired." Alec sighed heavily.

"Did something bother you?" Jace shows his concern.

Alec looking at Jace and glad that Jace is here. Maybe this is the right time, Alec is really needed some suggestion or advice. Jace can be sorted as one kind of love expert, doesn't it?

"Yes. Can we talk in somewhere privately?" Alec noticed that few Shadowhunters walking around them, which made Alec feel nervous and uncomfortable.

"Sure. Come with me." Jace then leads Alec to Alec's bedroom.

[To Be Continued]

A/N: Thank you for your kind support, which give me strength to keep going!
Here the new short Malec story, hope you all can enjoy it!

New chapter coming soon, stay tuned! Much love ya~! ^o^