Just My Type
The hard choice

…

A strong breeze blew off the water and the Wingull circled lazily overhead. The sea, there was nothing else in the world that so tested a mon; fortified him, purified him. Since ancient times warriors had come to train by the sea; to stare unblinking across the waves, and squint when the sun came out and reflected its blinding rays right in their face.

"Sly, are you going to stare at the water all day?"

"I might."

"But I want you to stare at me."

Which was but one more reason he was staring at the sea. He very pointedly refused to even glance in her direction. She took this as a challenge.

"Slyyyyyyyyyy!" she whined.

No man liked to hear a woman whine, but it was even worse when you were attracted to the female and it was 'that' sort of whine. Not the sort that made you want to grind your teeth and punch something. No, this was the other kind; the kind that stoked the flames, put yeast in the bread as it were. It certainly got things rising anyway.

Sly struggled to shrug off the effects. Just because he found her attractive didn't mean she owned him. He was his own mon. He would not rise to her bait.

I said not rise… not rise. Get back down there you! Bad boy, BAD! Down! Down, down, down! DOWN!... down. Good. Stay there.

"Where'd Squirt get to?"

"Up there," said Sly, gesturing at the mountains in the background.

"Mountain climbing?"

"I dunno. He seemed to be in an odd mood all morning."

"You think something was bothering him?"

"Could be. All I know is I saw him talking to that Aipom at the restaurant this morning, then he told me he was headin for the mountains."

"I hope he's alright."

"I'm sure he'll be fine."

"Oh SlyyYyyy."

"Hmm," without thinking, he looked.

Realizing his mistake immediately it was already too late, he was trapped. Her fluttering lashes and come-hither eyes held him more tightly than bars and chains of finest steel ever could.

Don't give in. Be strong. Don't rise to it, DON'T RISE!

"Sly."

SHIT! Stop rising. Stop rising!

Meanwhile, halfway up the mountain, Squirt was dealing with his own existential crisis.

Feet pattering up the old dirt trail gave no indication to the depths of his turmoil. That was the problem with being a small Pokémon; it was hard to convey depth when you barely left a footprint.

None the less, it was deep. Deep as the deepest deeps.

Well, maybe not quite that deep.

He was a long way from home. Farther than he'd ever thought he'd be. It was amazing. He'd seen and done so many things and yet, the one thing he'd set out to do, he hadn't.

Evolution. He was spoiled for choice, and no closer to figuring which one to make than he'd been when he left home. He'd seen numerous examples of all the possible types he could become and more, so why.

"Why is this so hard?" he grumbled.

Head down in deep concentration, the road continued winding around the mountain. It was a plain road, uniform, smooth and flat with no obstruction till that black and white roadblock sauntered onto the path.

"Oof!"

"Hey! Watch where you're going!"

Squirt shook his head and briefly considered the small black and white mon. "Sorry," he said, then made to go around.

The Pancham cut him off, jumping into his path, "Sorry! Yeah you look pretty sorry."

The Pancham sneered at the scowling Eevee, "What is your problem!"

"Your face!" he shot back, throwing an unprovoked Sucker punch that sent Squirt skidding across the road toward the wall.

Rolling with it, his feet hit the wall and he launched himself to the attack. His Headbutt took the Pancham off guard and he skipped like a stone on the water, except the road was more solid, and gritty.

"You wanna fight huh?" the Pancham grunted, picking itself up.

"Nope." Charging up, he blasted the unsuspecting bully with a Thundershock; watching him dance for just a second before rushing in and slamming him with a tail as hard as iron.

The Pancham sailed into the air, through the trees, and out of sight. "Nice to meet you," Squirt called after, wearing a smug little grin as he did. "Well, that was pointless," and yet he couldn't help feeling a little better despite it all. With a skip in his step, he continued up the mountain.

The forest closed in over the road as he approached the end. The humidity rose and bug Pokémon called to each other across the treetops.

"Hey Bill!"

"Yeah Charlie."

"You seen Susan?"

"Not since last night."

"Why'd you see her last night?"

"Uh… no reason."

"You bastard!"

"That guys in trouble," Squirt remarked, leaving the bug type soap opera behind as he pressed on toward the sound of falling water.

The road didn't so much end as fade. Gravel became hidden beneath a carpet of moss, made damp by the spray of the water falling from higher up the mountain.

He'd made it, "Now to find that sage."

The Aipom he'd spoken to had told him of a sage that lived at the end of the road, high up the mountain. He hadn't thought to ask what this sage looked like or how to find him. Bit of a missed opportunity, now that he was up there already.

He wasted a half hour scouring the area but all he found was a Ledyba named Susan, sleeping off something that smelled fermented. "Boy will she be in for a surprise when she wakes up."

Frustrated, he plopped down on a mossy rock near the waterfall for a good, hard think. He was spared the effort by the appearance of a Pangoro striding from the heavy bamboo wood like a shadow stepping out of the darkness.

"Ello there," she greeted, because it was definitely a she. Her voice, while low and gruff, still carried an unmistakably feminine timbre. Good thing cuz otherwise he'd never have pegged the big panda in the gray coat for a girl.

"Uh, excuse me. I was wondering if you could help me?"

"Spos'n that depends on what your problem is," she said, leaning over the pond and scooping out a handful of water.

"I'm looking for the sage that lives around here. Can you tell me where I can find him?"

The Pangoro sipped her water, staring at him out of one eye, "Must be looking for my husband."

"Your husband!"

She nodded, taking another drink as the Eevee squirmed excitedly. "Only 'sage' I know lives up here. He's a Pansage ya see."

"That's great! Where is he? I wah… wait. Pansage. PanSAGE!"

"Wasn't an Aipom that sent you up here was it?" she said in the fashion of someone who'd had this conversation so many times she could have it in her sleep and still be convincing.

"That sneaky, low down, two-faced, son-of-a…"

The Pangoro went about her business as Squirt screamed and railed. The injustice of it all. Couldn't trust anybody. What was he thinking? Gonna kill that stupid monkey.

His tirade broke off into incoherency as the Pangoro calmly snapped a bamboo twig off a nearby stalk and pulled up a mossy rock to wait. It began to peter out when words failed, and he started beating his head against the rock. An odd way to learn Rock smash; Sly would approve.

"Bout done there?" she asked.

Squirt whined, hitting his head against the rock a final time before flopping on his side, utterly defeated.

Moss covered rock wins.

"S'not fair," he mumbled piteously.

"Life's like that sometimes. What you need a sage for anyway?"

"I need to ask him something. Something important."

"What?"

Without even thinking about it, he told her, everything. She was a good listener, that Pangoro, which was lucky because once he got going it came in an unending flood.

Things he'd not even realized he'd been bottling up came bursting out. It was the most exhausting thing he'd ever done, which was funny since the only thing moving was his mouth.

"I think I see what the problem is," she said sometime later as he lay panting like he'd just run a marathon. "You seem to have built up this idea about evolution, what it is, what it means, and it's been driving you crazy."

"Huh?"

"Well, think of it this way. Evolution is just a reflection of who you are. Your brother, the Jolteon. Even before he evolved, he was already a Jolteon deep down, yeah? Your sisters, your cousins. Their evolution didn't change who they were, just what they were."

"Yeah but, I don't know what I'm supposed to be."

"That's because your so stuck on this idea of evolution. The idea that you need to change what you are to be who you are. You don't."

Tired as he was, it took a bit of mulling for what she was saying to sink in, sort of. "So your saying this whole trip, my quest to find myself, was all a waste of time?"

"Course not," she said with a casual dismissal. "Life is all about the experience, and you can always be a better you. Doesn't mean you have to fundamentally change who you are, does it?"

Did it? It was a crazy idea, so simple yet so profound. Had he been going at it wrong all this time? If so, what did he do now?

What did he do now?

"Hey you!"

A familiar and fuming Pancham glared at Squirt from across the clearing.

"You again?" said the Eevee.

"What you want boy!" the Pangoro barked in a very clear 'mom' voice.

The Pancham flinched but only for a second, "Not you ma, him."

"You two know each other?" she asked.

"Kinda," Squirt hedged, smirking.

"He kicked me down the mountain!"

"All the way?" asked Squirt.

"YES!"

"Nice," he said with a satisfied smile.

"That's what you get for pickin fights," his mother said.

Maybe it was, but he wasn't about to accept it, "Bro's! Get out here!"

Quite suddenly the little glade was filled with dozens of Pancham.

"These all yours?"

"I love my husband," the Pangoro nodded.

"What's that got to do with anything?"

"Hey ma, you wanna get outta the way?"

"Well, you were wondering who you are," she said, standing and giving her behind a quick dust, "guess your about to find out."

The Pancham grinned wickedly as their mother cleared the field, leaving the Eevee facing the black and white horde.

Find out who he was, huh. Facing this horde, who did he really want to be. Hmm. Sly seemed like a good choice.

"Okay boys!" he barked, cracking his tail against his rock like a whip. "Who's first?"