Susan hesitated at the door to the Professor and Polly's cottage. It had been a month since the train accident that claimed the life of her entire family, her life. The next few weeks were a blur. Dealing with identifying the bodies, the funeral preparations, helping her aunt and uncle do the same with Eustace. Dealing with the lawyers, the trusts, the estate, the settlement with the train company. Her attorney told her she was now quite wealthy, like it was supposed to make it better?
Her so called friends had all abandoned her. Oh, they came to the funeral, they gave their platitudes, but when she needed them, they were nowhere to be seen. Her Uncle had taken her aunt on a cruise to Australia, they had needed to get away, Susan understood completely. They had invited her to come but she had refused. Instead, she found herself standing outside of the professors…her cottage.
The Castle had been destroyed during the blitz, but it sat on 200 acres, where Aunt Polly and the Professor still lived, in the caretakers cottage. She wanted to get away from the memories, of the crash, of her family, but here she was confronting them again.
Unlocking the door, she saw everything was untouched. They had left, not knowing that they would never return. Avoiding the spare bedroom, where Peter had been staying, she went to put her bags in the master bedroom. Opening the door she saw it immediately. It dominated the entire room. A wardrobe.
Tears suddenly appeared in her eyes. She found herself on her knees, sobbing. Unable to get any words out until she heard herself cry ASLAN! Through her sobs, she herd a voice, his voice, booming through the cottage,
"Susan, High Queen of Narnia, do you love me?"
"Yes my Lord, with all my heart!" Susan sobbed out, scared to open her eyes
"care for my lambs"
Again the voice came, quieter this time
"Susan, High Queen of Narnia, do you truly love me?"
"Yes Lord" Susan replied "You know I love you"
"Then feed my sheep"
Again the voice of Aslan came, this time in a whisper
"Susan, do you really love me"
Bowing her head, she quietly sobbed. She had rejected Aslan so many times. How could he love her. How could He believe her? How could he want her?
"Yes Aslan, I love you. I'm so sorry, I…I." she began to stutter. The voice interrupted her
"Then, my child, look up" Slowly, Susan raised her head. "and follow me, for once a king or queen of Narnia, Always a king of Narnia". Susan stared into the face of the Lion, hardly believing what she was hearing. After all she had said, after all she had done.
"My child, I have already forgiven you, and forgotten." Aslan replied to her unspoken words.
"My family" Susan started
"Today, they are with me in Paradise" Aslan said. "But, when we last talked, I asked you to seek me in this world. To find my name here. You have done so." It was not a question.
Susan nodded. "yes, My Lord, and My God".
"Then go, and feed my sheep, Queen Susan the Gentle"
Susan woke with a start. Opening her eyes, she saw that she was on the floor, in front of the wardrobe. It was morning. Had she dreamed last night? As she placed her hand on the bed, to pull herself up, her hand found a long piece of wood. A bow. Her bow. Her eyes filled with tears at the gift given to her by Father Christmas so many years ago. "Yes Lord" she cried, her eyes filled with tears, as she hugged the bow and quiver to her chest. "Send me".
Chapter 2
It was a dreary day at Westminster Abbey. The sun was hidden behind the clouds, as the rain drizzled down. Yet the church was packed. It was standing room only. It was a Funeral, fit for a Queen.
Standing before the casket, which was covered in red roses, a tearful middle aged woman was giving a eulogy, as tears streamed down her face.
"I was a little girl, who had lost both of her parents. My father during the war, my mother to a slow, wasting cancer. A child of 8, I held my mothers hand as life left her body. I didn't know where I would go, or what would become of me. But then". The woman stopped to compose herself before continuing
"An angel arrived. She took my hand, and took me into her home. She took care of the funeral arrangements. She held my hand as they buried my Mum. She held me as I cried myself to sleep."
She continued. "Today there are many people here to honor her memory because of the things she has done for England, and for the world."
"Ambassadors, Presidents, and dignitaries from around the world remember her for her speeches on child welfare, her championing of the poor, the sick, and the dying. Yet while you remember her in this way, I and hundreds of other children will always remember her as Queen Susan the Gentle. Who would tell us stories of Cair Paravel, and of the lone islands. Who would tell us of talking beasts, and magical portals, until our sobbing would stop, as we fell asleep."
"I once asked her, how I could ever repay her, and she gave me that wonderful smile, and told me 'my child, go and do likewise'".
"She never stopped working, never stopped helping. And on that night, when she saw the child, crying on the side of that road, next to the wrecked car of his parents, she didn't hesitate to stop. And when the truck driver came out of nowhere, she didn't hesitate to throw the child to safety." The woman stopped, as tears began to flow down her face. "Aunt Susan gave her life that day because of who she was, for once a king or queen of Narnia" She stopped, she couldn't continue. Suddenly, the queen stood, followed by the entirety of Westminster abbey. "Always a king or queen of Narnia" came the voices of hundreds from the pews.
Susan stood up, wondering where she was. She looked around, desperate to make sure that the child she was helping was safe. A shadow fell on her from behind, that of a man. Turning around, she saw him "Aslan!?"
"Well done, my good and faithful servant" Aslan laughed, as she saw Peter, Edmund, Lucy, and all the rest appear. She ran to them, throwing herself in their arms crying.
"For once a king or queen of Narnia, always a king or queen of Narnia!" Aslan finished