Disclaimer: Avatar: The Last Airbender, its characters and universe belong to Michael Dante DiMartino, Bryan Konietzko and Nickelodeon. I'm only a fan, writing this for love of this TV show and personal pleasure.

Summary: Feeling down after the play, Aang has a talk with his Firebending Master and gains some much needed perspective. Afterwards, he wants to set things right with Katara so that he may concentrate on his fight against the Fire Lord. Set right after The Ember Island Players.

A.N.: There's such a shift of mood between Aang and Katara from the end of The Ember Island Players to the beginning of The Phoenix King that it's almost like there's an entire episode missing between the two━not to mention the fact that the Gaang decided to postpone confronting Fire Lord Ozai until after the Comet and that Zuko was none the wiser; so there are definitely some missing scenes there and this is my take on it.

Push and Pull

Chapter One: Guiding Light

"Ugh, worst play ever!" Aang groaned as soon as they walked into the house, removing that stupid hat from his head and carelessly tossing it aside on top of an armchair. Everyone else pretty much murmured agreements as they trudged in after him, but the Airbender noticed with a frown that Zuko was crossing the hall and going straight towards the back of the house while the others had assembled in the living room. "Zuko?"

"I can't sleep right now," the Fire Nation Prince replied curtly over his shoulder, in his customary low, rasping voice. "I'll be in the courtyard." Aang nodded in understanding. No doubt he felt the need to bend some of his frustration away.

"Okay, I'll admit it wasn't the best idea to go see the play," Sokka commented as he sat down on the couch, throwing his arm over Suki's shoulders. "I keep forgetting we're in the Fire Nation and that for them we're the bad guys."

Katara opened her mouth as if she were about to say something, but after a moment she closed it again and just sat down on an armchair, crossing her arms tightly over her chest. She'd wanted to come out and say comforting words, something, anything. But her portrayal in the play as that preachy crybaby with the over-emotional speeches weighed down in her mind and she hesitated long enough to change her mind.

"Well, I knew they hated us," Toph commented as she plopped down on the couch next to Suki, her arm slung over the armrest and dangling over. "But it was still pretty disturbing to hear them all laughing and cheering when 'Azula' and the 'Fire Lord' took down 'Zuko' and 'Aang'."

"It's the Fire Nation's propaganda at its best," Suki explained, with something of a helpless shrug. "Especially in Ember Island that is basically a place only for the Fire Nation elite. They wholly believe that speech that the Fire Lord's war is their way of spreading wealth and happiness with the rest of the world, and in their eyes anyone going against that is only trying to destroy their way of life."

"Ironic how they don't see that their 'spreading wealth and happiness' is destroying the other Nations' way of life," Toph countered darkly.

Aang stood in the doorway between the living room and the hallway, his hands balling into shaking fists. Now he really wished they hadn't gone to see that play. Their completely screwed up portrayals notwithstanding (after all, he got the idea of parody and hyperbole as a form of humor, though he really didn't appreciate that it was at his expense), the worst part had been the quick review of all their past mistakes━all of his past mistakes: Almost failing to protect the Northern Water Tribe, his fall in Ba Sing Se, the whole fiasco that was the invasion. He couldn't help feeling that they were fated for another failure now.

"What if…" Aang said, his eyes down on the floor and his voice barely above a whisper, yet the others all turned their heads to him. "What if they're right?"

"You mean, what if we're the bad guys?" Sokka raised an eyebrow in confusion at him.

"No," Aang said, running his tongue over his dry lips. "I mean, what if they're right and we're going to lose?"

Heavy silence greeted his words. Aang lifted his eyes and instinctively looked across the room at Katara. She was always the voice of reason, the one with the warmest heart in their group and he needed now more than ever to listen to her encouraging words. But as his grey eyes met her blue ones, she averted her gaze, looking down at the floor. A look of pain crossed his face at that.

Sokka had also glanced over at his sister. For as much as he made fun of her for her tearful hopeful speeches, he also relied a lot on her for moral support. She was the one lifting them up when things got real bad, so it was with a frown that he realized the moments were passing and she hadn't spoken up. She wasn't even looking at any of them, her form slumped on the armchair as she hugged her knees up to her chest.

"Look, you can't think like that," Suki then said, as she seemed to sense something weird was happening and that someone needed to fill in the void. "Half the outcome of the battle comes down to our attitude. We can do this."

"But can we?" Aang retorted, still frowning and now looking at Suki. "The Comet is coming in a week. Do you guys feel prepared for that? Because I don't. I still need to master firebending."

"It's true, we could use some more training and preparing," Toph muttered in agreement.

"Hold on," Sokka suddenly said in his tone of voice that indicated he'd had a brilliant idea. "Why do we have to fight the Fire Lord before the Comet comes?"

"I don't know," Aang replied, shrugging his shoulders a little. "Doesn't that seem kind of instinctive? I did go through all that trouble to talk to Avatar Roku back at the winter solstice and get this message that I needed to defeat Fire Lord Ozai before the Comet arrives at the end of summer or the war would be lost."

"Yeah, but technically the war is already lost," Sokka continued with his train of thought. "The Earth Kingdom kinda fell when we lost Ba Sing Se. So I don't get why we're still rushing to meet this Comet deadline."

"Okay, so then when do you propose we fight him?" Toph turned to him with her question.

"How about after the Comet?" Sokka proposed quite simply. "That way we get more time to train and prepare, Aang gets to master firebending and we don't need to face the Fire Lord when he's super extra powerful because of the Comet but only a regular power-crazed Firebender."

"You know, it does make sense," Suki said after a moment of consideration. "And we'd have the element of surprise on our side. He'd never think we would attack them after the Comet; they'll just think we gave up."

"Yeah," Toph nodded in agreement. "We can pick a time and date that is good for us instead of just rushing into battle because of the Comet."

"What do you think, Katara?" Aang asked softly, his eyes seeking her form once more.

The Water Tribe girl had been listening intently to the discussion but had refrained from voicing her opinion so far. She started a little at Aang's question and lifted her eyes to meet his. She offered him a tiny smile as she said, "If it will give you the time you need to master firebending, then I think it's worth it."

Aang acknowledged it with a nod back at her and an impassive expression on his face.

"Okay, that sounds like a plan," Sokka declared, getting up to his feet and stretching his arms over his head. "Well, I don't know about you guys but I'm beat. I think I'm going straight to bed now."

"Yep, quite beat," Suki parroted, also jumping up to her feet and making quite a show of giving a huge yawn. "Good night, everyone!"

She and Sokka hurried out the corridor and up the stairs while the others followed at a more leisurely pace. But when they got to the hallway Aang headed towards the back of the house instead of the stairs. "I'm just going to check on Zuko," he told the girls over his shoulder. "Good night."

"Okay. Good night, Twinkle Toes," Toph called out to him, already mounting up the steps.

"Good night," Katara said quietly as she frowned at his retreating figure, standing for a moment on the first step, her hand paused over the wooden railing as her fingers twitched slightly, before also heading upstairs once Aang walked out of sight.

As the Airbender crossed his way through the big house to the back he couldn't stop thinking about the events of that night. He'd really made a mess of things with Katara this time. He knew he shouldn't have talked to her about the two of them when his frustration got the better of him, but he'd previously tried talking to her at the Western Air Temple and she'd kept deflecting the subject. It seemed like it was never the right time; they were either running for their lives or he was training so hard during the day that at night after dinner he'd promptly go to sleep, completely exhausted, or she was going off in little side adventures to avenge her mother's killer with Zuko. Okay, so that had only happened once, but still.

Aang knew that her avoidance of the subject wasn't a good sign. After all, Katara was nothing if not the very definition of stubborn determination. When she wanted something, she went after it and made it happen. That was how she'd gotten Master Pakku to teach her waterbending or how she'd gotten them all to stay and help that downtrodden fishing town, and it was one of the many things he loved about her. So deep down he knew that if she'd wanted to be with him, she'd already had made it happen.

But try as he might, Aang just couldn't let it go. He couldn't let her go; that had always been his weakness, why he hadn't managed to master the Avatar state. He was so in love with her and he just knew they would be great together. Why couldn't she see what was so clear to him? At times he felt like she did feel the same for him, like that night when they danced at the secret dance party at the cave or when he'd kissed her before the invasion━after all, he did feel her kissing him back. But other times it was like she just kept pulling away from him. And the more he pushed, the more she pulled away.

Still lost in his thoughts, Aang reached the inner courtyard where he and Zuko would usually practice firebending. As he crossed the threshold, he found his firebending Master stripped down to only his pants and engaged in a series of gruelling firebending exercises, as he quickly went from one form to another, fire shooting gracefully out of his hands and feet. After a few moments, Zuko fell into a pattern that Aang recognized from their lessons and he barely hesitated before removing his shoes, coat and shirt and stepping up to accompany his movements.

They spent quite a few minutes in companionable silence as they went through the movements and execution of the different forms. Aang had to admit that Zuko had the right idea; firebending was an excellent way to deal with frustration, as the aggressiveness of handling fire helped him with his convoluted thoughts as he focused everything on the task at hand and tired his body with the physical activity.

Some time later, the two of them were sitting by the fountain, both wiping the sweat from their foreheads and breathing deeply to catch their breaths. Aang leaned back on his hands as he looked up at the night sky, and he said, "Zuko, can I ask you something?"

"Yeah," the Firebender replied curtly as he leaned forward, his elbows supported on his knees as he looked down at the ground.

Aang had meant to ask about the upcoming conflict with the Fire Lord and their idea of waiting for the Comet to come and go. However the words that actually came out once he opened his mouth were, "Is there something going on with you and Katara?"

For his part, Zuko turned his head slightly to look at him with a frown. "What do you mean? Ugh, don't tell me she's back to hating me! What have I done now?" He finished in a woebegone tone, as he turned dejectedly to the ground once more.

"What? No, not that I know of," Aang turned with a frown of his own back at him.

"Then what are you talking about?" Zuko questioned, sitting up a little straighter.

"Well, I mean," Aang said, as he hesitated slightly, one of his hands going up to rub at the back of his head. "I was just thinking about that scene in the play, at the catacombs in Ba Sing Se. Did something━is something━did the two of you━?"

"Hold on," Zuko interrupted him, holding one of his hands up and his frown becoming more pronounced. "Are you asking me if Katara and I have a thing? As in, if we like each other sort of thing?"

"Well, yeah," Aang said, shrugging his shoulders rather sheepishly.

"No," Zuko said the word emphatically, looking at Aang as if the answer should've been obvious. "I actually have a girlfriend. Or had a girlfriend," he looked thoughtfully up for a moment. "I'm not sure anymore, it's very complicated." He looked back at Aang before continuing. "Anyway, I like Katara but not like that. What even gave you that idea? I mean, she was literally hating my guts up until yesterday!"

"I don't know, I just━," Aang said, huffing the air out of his mouth exasperatedly. "That stupid play and then she said she was confused and argh! I just don't know what to think anymore." He pressed the palms of his hands up against his closed eyes, as he shook his head.

Zuko's frown softened somewhat as he looked at the younger teenager. Not for the first time he wondered how it was that he had ended up in this position, as the older and supposedly wiser person in this ragtag team of teenage prodigies with so much responsibility on their young shoulders. At times like these he really wished Uncle was with them. No doubt he'd have wise and comforting words to help alleviate all the doubt and pain.

The Fire Nation Prince looked up at the sky for a moment as he thought on how he should proceed. He'd tried a few times to channel Uncle and see if he had any wise words or advices, but he had to admit that wasn't his style. He always ended up saying something confusing or inane or, more often than not, both.

So he just decided to be honest and be himself. "Okay, first of all that play was bullshit and you know it," Zuko said, as he glanced down at Aang. "What happened in Ba Sing Se was nothing like that. It was actually worse, at least the way I see it. Katara was nice to me. She offered me comforting words and a hand in friendship, but I turned around and betrayed her. That's why she was having so much trouble trusting me now."

Aang had removed his hands from his face and merely looked up as Zuko talked about all of it. He'd wondered what had happened when he'd found Katara and Zuko back in the catacombs in Ba Sing Se; it had seemed as if he'd interrupted a moment between them but then they never had a chance to talk about it. When Zuko had recently joined them he knew she was the most reluctant of the group to give him a chance and she'd nearly gone ballistic when they'd wanted to go just the two of them to the Sun Warrior's land to find the origins of firebending, but they hadn't actually talked about any of that or gone into details on why she couldn't let go of her anger and distrust of him.

"You said something about her being confused," Zuko continued. "Did she say something about me? I thought we had settled this after going after her mother's killer and when we talked when we first got here on Ember Island."

"No, she didn't say anything about you," Aang explained, once more a soft frown appearing on his countenance. "I had just assumed… I'm sorry, I'm being an idiot." He sighed, leaning back on his hands and looking up at the night sky, the bright moon shining down gently on them.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Zuko then said, not looking at Aang but down at the ground once more. "I mean, I know a thing or two about being an idiot when it comes to girls." He eyed him out of the corner of his good eye and it seemed like a smile tugged at his mouth.

"I don't know," Aang said with some uncertainty. While at same time if felt a little weird to be talking about all of this with Zuko, Aang had been the one to broach the subject. And when he thought about it, who was he going to talk to about this? Katara was out of the question after the disaster he'd made tonight. Sokka, too, for obvious reasons. He had no idea how this conversation would go over with Toph, and while he suspected Suki might actually be good to give him some advice about all of this, it was hard to get her alone long enough without Sokka trailing after her.

"Okay," Aang said at last, breathing out a sigh. "The thing is, I kissed her."

"Tonight?" Zuko found himself raising his eyebrow at this.

"No. I mean, yes! I mean, I did━but I shouldn't have," Aang said, stumbling a little over his words. He took a quick breath in and out. "Let me start over. I kissed her on the day of the eclipse, before the invasion. We'd actually kissed once before, but we never talked about it. We were trapped in a tunnel and it was dark and there was this legend… Anyway, we kissed and I'd been trying to get her to talk about it ever since, but she's always avoiding it and saying how I need to focus on firebending and the war and everything else. But tonight that stupid play got to me and I finally asked her if she just thought of me as a little brother."

"And? What did she say?" Zuko asked, gently probing as Aang had reached a lull in his narrative.

"That's when she said she didn't know and that she was confused," he said as he slumped over, placing his elbows on his knees and leaning his chin on his hands, frowning down at the ground. "I don't get why she's confused. I know I'm not crazy, I felt her kissing me back those other times. And I know we're in the middle of a war and there are important things we have to do. But to me there's nothing more important than Katara and how I feel about her."

"Wow," Zuko breathed out, and Aang turned to look at him, finding the older guy looking intently at him. "That's deep. And heavy."

"It's the truth," Aang replied, merely shrugging his shoulder as if it were simple as that.

"Okay, I get that," Zuko nodded at him after a moment. "I understand where you're coming from. But just stop for a minute and try to understand why putting that out there for her now might make her a little conflicted. We are in the middle of a war and she probably doesn't want you getting distracted. We all need to focus everything we have so that we can end this fight, once and for all."

"I know," Aang heaved a sigh. "It was stupid and selfish of me to bring this up to her now, I get that. But I can't help but feel like… What if I don't come back?" He looked straight back at Zuko, his grey eyes shining brightly like the near full moon above them. "Then she would never know how I feel about her. And if this is the only time I get to be with her, then I want that."

Zuko couldn't help but stare in wonder at him. Sometimes his brain found it hard to connect the fact that the kid before him was the Avatar. Aang was just too young, too silly, easygoing and goofy. But then he'd see him in action when he was fighting and bending and it was such an incongruous image, how this kid could have and command so much power. But as Zuko looked at him now as Aang talked of love and life and death and he seemed so sure and calm about it all, he'd never looked so much like someone way older than his earthly years.

"You think I'm being stupid," Aang said as he frowned once more, misreading Zuko's silence at his words.

"No," Zuko replied quickly, blinking down at him and coming out of his private reverie. "No, I don't think so. I think you're really brave."

"Yeah, right," Aang retorted derisively, looking down once more, thinking he was being condescending.

"I mean it," Zuko insisted, infusing his voice with sincerity. "You know what you feel and you're not afraid to show it. But you know, not everyone is like that. Most people are afraid of letting others know how they feel, of letting other people in. It takes a lot of guts to be so open and honest like you are."

"Well, thanks, I guess," Aang replied, smiling a little at him beside himself.

"That said, you can't expect Katara to be like you," Zuko continued, trying to give some perspective to the younger guy. "Even if she does have feelings for you, and I believe she does, she's probably just afraid of losing you. So she's right, you know, you can't afford to be distracted right now. You need to give all you got into training and getting better and preparing to face my father. You can't go into battle thinking you're not coming back."

"Yeah, Suki said the same thing," the Airbender commented with a somewhat crooked smile. "Wait, so you actually think Katara has feelings for me?" He perked up as the words registered in his brain and he looked up at Zuko.

"You're missing the point here," Zuko barked out sharply in impatience, causing Aang to grimace at his tone. "It doesn't matter if I think she has feelings for you or not. That's not what's important. You need to focus on what you're going to do now to make sure you do come back and then you can see it for yourself."

"Okay, I understand," Aang said, an intense look in his eyes as he nodded seriously back at Zuko. A moment later, however, his concentrated look broke into a sheepish grin as he said, "But just so we're clear, you do think she has feelings for me?"

"Aang," Zuko exclaimed in exasperation, as he frowned at him. Then he sighed and his expression softened as he said, "I do. You know, she threatened to kill me if I so much as lifted a finger against you when I first joined you. Let me tell you, I believed her."

"Huh," Aang merely said in reply, blinking up his eyes at him as for a moment he didn't know what to think. "But that could be just because I'm the Avatar and all."

"No, I think it's more than that," Zuko said, shaking his head slightly. "Just trust me on this, okay? I saw the way she looked and reacted when Azula shot you down in Ba Sing Se. She's probably terrified something like that is going to happen again." A shiver seemed to run down his back at these words, so he turned back to Aang with a very serious look in his golden eyes. "So you can't let that happen again, got it?"

Aang paused for a few moments, letting his words sink in and thinking of everything he'd said. "All right. Thank you, Zuko. I promise I won't let that happen." He got up and bowed before him, making the traditional Fire Nation greeting with his hands.

"Good," Zuko nodded gravely back at him, and then pushed himself off the fountain, standing up once more and also bowing respectfully at him. "Now let's get some sleep. I want us to get up early and focus on training. I want to start you on some more advanced firebending."

"Yes, Sifu Hotman." A sly smile tugged at the corner of Aang's lips.

"I already told you to stop calling me that." Zuko's own lips twitched at the corners.

The two of them gathered their discarded pieces of clothing and headed back inside the house.