December 30

The cold wind whips Jill's hair around her face as she makes her way across Foley Square, wishing fruitlessly that she didn't have a meeting with Roger scheduled for this afternoon. Things have been uncomfortable between them of late, and while they both worked hard at keeping their professional relationship separate from the personal, it was impossible not to notice the awkwardness that had recently settled over all of their interactions.

Up until a few weeks ago, everything had been fine. Friendly. They were people who went to baseball games together, took in the occasional movie or dinner, and every so often – well, more often than not, to be honest – had sex. Consensual, adult, mutually enjoyable, no-strings-attached sex. Always at his place, as he lived much closer to work. She travelled with a toothbrush in her purse and then went home to her little apartment where everything was just as she liked it. She was happy. She'd thought he was happy too. Clearly she'd been wrong.

Three weeks ago on a Saturday she'd found out just how wrong she'd been. She'd spent the night and they were passing a lazy morning watching SportsCenter on his couch while eating leftover Chinese from the previous evening when suddenly he'd muted the TV, silencing her protest with a somber "I need to ask you something."

"OK..." she'd responded uneasily, putting down the lo mein that had suddenly lost all its savor. That was never a good phrase and her stomach was already knotting in trepidation.

"Where do you see this going?Us?"

"You mean...us together?"

"Yes. Do you see this ever becoming something serious?Or are we just having fun?"

She'd sighed.

"You know how I feel. I'm really not looking for a relationship. Now. Or ever. I'm just not. And even if I were, we're just way too different for it to ever work. I'm sorry. I'm having a lot of fun. I thought you were too."

Roger had stood, walked over to the window and gazed out for a minute. When he'd turned back

the sadness in his eyes made Jill's heart sink.

"I guess I was. For a while. But the thing is... I care for you, Jill. I want more. And I'm not going to stop wanting it. For my own sanity and mental health, I think its a good idea if we stop seeing each other outside of work."

"What about the Yankees?" she'd asked, stunned.

His smile was wry, lacking any genuine humor.

"We've got a few months. We can reassess later.

Jill shakes her head as she arrives at Roger's office, trying to dislodge the memory. Surprised, she notices through the door that he is not alone. There is a woman leaning against his desk and they appear to be having an intimate conversation. When the woman turns to face the door Jill realizes that 1) she is about Jill's age and strikingly beautiful and 2) she is familiar, with a face that Jill knows she's seen on TV.

"Am I interrupting? We said two' o clock, right?"

"Yes, come in. Senator Knox is just leaving."

Senator Knox. Of course. The U.S. Senator from Texas. Jill had seen her frequently on CNN, but she was much lovelier in person.

"Oh please – do call me Melora, Roger," she purrs. Her manicured hand runs caressingly across

Roger's sleeve.

Roger stands, indicating Jill.

"Melora, you'll excuse me but we do have a meeting scheduled. This is my colleage, Jill Carlan, head of the Federal Public Defender's Office.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ms. Carlan."

Melora Knox shakes Jill's hand with a cool smile. Her dark eyes sweep over Jill, taking in the suit she'd gotten half-off five years ago. Jill has never paid much attention to fashion, but she is suddenly very aware that the other woman is clad in head-to-toe Armani and that her perfume probably retails for more than six months of Jill's salary.

"It's an honor, Senator Knox."

Senator Knox does not ask Jill to call her "Melora."

"Bye, Roger. We'll see you tomorrow night then."

"Absolutely," Roger smiles warmly.

Senator Knox smiles back and heads down the hallway.

Jill raises her eyebrows as she slides into the chair across from Roger.

"I didn't realize you knew the Senator so well."

"Her son works for me. Leonard."

"Ah." Jill knows she should probably leave it at that, but her curiosity gets the better of her.

"So she'll see you tomorrow?"

"She invited me to her New Year's Eve party." Roger slides an engraved invitation across the desk. Jill recognizes the name of the swanky downtown club, realizing she'd read a profile of it in last week's Times.

"Are you going?"

"Definitely. Should be a good time. You?Hot date?"

Jill shrugs.

"I'll probably stay in, watch the ball drop, go to bed early. New Years is overrated.

"Well, you enjoy" Roger says disinterestedly. He slides the invitation into his desk and pulls out a folder. "So. What's on the agenda for today"