•Fairy Tail belongs to Hiro Mashima.

•This is based off the book Catch a Mate by Gena Showalter

Chapter 1 - Who is he?

Lucy POV:

Men were pigs, some were piglets all oink and no bite. Some were swine-in training teetering on the edge between man and boar. Then some were hungry hogs, devouring everything in their path.

Those are the ones I hate most. Those don't care about anything or anyone. No worries about repercussions.

But no matter where a guy fell on the pigometer, It's safe to say or rather I'm proud to say.

I'm the slaughter house.

I'd happily chop them up and serve their balls on a silver platter.

The victims of infidelity are left scarred and their faith in trust ruined. They would never be the same. Trust me, I know from experience.

When I was seven years old, I discovered my dad cheating on my mom with the neighbor. I'd kept quiet at first not wanting my parents to split. But six months after that, my mother flew out to visit my aunt and decided to come home earlier to surprise us. That's when she found my father in bed with the neighbor. I told her the truth and she was utterly devastated.

So devastated that the next morning I found my mother trying to kill herself. She was in the hospital for three days..

Needless to say, they divorced and I haven't spoken to him since. My dad still tries to call but I never pick up. It was a painful experience and I wouldn't wish that on anyone, especially a family.

That's why I enjoy taking these assholes down.

I never get to tell my clients that their men cheated; that's my boss's job.

However I often watch these conversations on the monitor in another room and what I see is always heartbreaking.

Tears, curses, sadness..

I've worked for Porlyusica at Fear a Fairy for six years. Gaining satisfaction in nailing a man's ass to the wall and saving women from heartbreak.

And speaking of nailing a male's ass.. I was supposed to have met with my boss thirty minutes ago. Instead I was met with a salmon haired sex on legs. I'd only gotten a glimpse of him but it was enough to know he was tanned, muscular, and wearing jeans that hugged all the right places.

Sure guys were pigs, but I'm allowed to look! I'm not blind!

Anyway, cute ass went to Porlyusica's office and they've had the door closed ever since. No sound, no nothing. Not even pressing my ear against the door has helped.

I have an assignment tonight and I have yet to look at photos of my target because I was supposed to meet with Porlyusica.

As my black heels tap impatiently into the floor tile of my very plain cubicle, I turn when I hear Mirajane's voice.

"Did you see the guy Porlyusica escorted into her office?"

Mira has gentle cheekbones, beautiful sapphire eyes and flawless skin. Her perfectly graceful features framed by long elegant platinum hair. Men become entranced whenever they see Mirajane Strauss approaching. She's the most popular choice for bait.

"I saw him." I nod then continue

"—But who is he? and why is he here?"

"Maybe Porlyusica gave up on self-gratification and found a lover?" Levy pipes up.

Levy McGarden is a natural beauty. Silky azure blue hair framing her big caramel colored eyes and delicate face. She's sweet and sassy in a small package. I always tell her she should be our logo!

Mira moves around my desk and plops onto the edge, making room for Levy inside my tiny cubicle.

"Or maybe he's her sister's brother-in-law's cousin? and he's here to visit?" Mira says

"Yeah, well ..I almost slid out my chair when her sister's brother-in-law's cousin walked by me." I admit

It had been a long time since I'd been with a man. So long, that when he'd passed by ..I only smelled Sin.

"That was a nice ass." Mira agrees

"Don't you have a boyfriend?" I frown trying not to think of her and Cute Ass together.

A dark, haunted glint entered Mira's eyes.

"I did.. or I do.."

"Are you guys having problems?" Levy asks

With a dismissive fake laugh she waves it off.

"No, not exactly. Things are the same as always. Freed tells me I'm beautiful everyday and asks me to marry him frequently. But, it's..I-I'm still thinking about it." She sighs

"If you have to think about it that hard, then he's not the man for you."

Freed treats her like queen, endless quotes and poems about her physical beauty. Except, where are the compliments about how strong, determined and kind hearted she is? Zip. Zero. Non existent.

"We could test him again?!" Levy suggests

"He'd just pass again. Knowing what we do for a living he's always suspicious of pretty women approaching him." Mira rolls her eyes defeated.

"Okay, how about we change the subject?" I suggest

"Yes! Let's talk about our boss's possible lover!" Levy squeaks out

"Yeah! There's no way an ordinary man could have charmed his way into a private meeting with Boss Lady Porly."

"Did he look at any of you when he passed by?"

Forehead furrowed and eyes blinking in confusion.

"No.." Levy says

"No, he didn't.." Mira answers

"He ignored Lisanna and I!" Juvia pops up behind Levy

"Hmm, same here." I say with a frown

Maybe he's a client? Perhaps? Except, we only deal with women. Unless he suspects his wife is a lesbian? Maybe? But to completely ignore the women in this office as if they were nothing more than asexual beings..

"Maybe he's gay?" Juvia inputs

"What a waste if he is." Cana says from I don't know where?!

"Hm, I didn't get a gay vibe, did you?" Levy asks Lisanna

"No." She shakes her head

"Do you think he's blind?" Ezra inputs

Seriously?! Why are we all cramping up in my cubicle?!

"Come on, Ezra. You can do better than that!" Mira giggles

"What Mira is trying to say, is that he would have needed a cane or service dog with him, Ezra." Levy answers

"Thank you Levy, well maybe he's so self-absorbed, he didn't realize anyone else was in the building!"

"Definitely!"

"No doubt!"

"You're right!"

"What an ass!"

Discussion over, everyone starts walking back to their desks.

"So where you going tonight Lu?" Levy lingers

"Yeah?! You look like a cheap hooker!" Cana nods approvingly

"Why, thank you." I smile

I'm wearing a white skintight v-neck for ultra cleavage. A barely there jean skirt, paired with thigh high boots. My hair in twin tails and makeup done dramatic.

I'm dressed for tonight's assignment. In my notes the target's girlfriend said the trashier the better. He apparently likes his women dressed like this.

Everything about me screams Saddle me up take me for a ride.

"I'm going to the Meat Market." I shrug

That's the name of the club, I'm not kidding.

The door to Porlyusica's office is suddenly jolted open and startles us all.

"Lucy! Get in here ASAP. I've got some bad news for you."

She disappears without another word but leaves the door open for me.

"Bad news?" Cana looks shocked

"I know she's usually abrupt, but that was.." Levy's voice goes low

"Maybe, my assignment was just resigned?" I say hopefully

"Yeah."

"Maybe.."

They don't look convinced. Neither am I.

"LUCY!" I gulp.

Bad news.. Shit.. I could already tell something is about to go down.

End of Chapter 1

•Preview: Ch.2*

"Disdain? At me? What did I do? Oh yeah, I accused him of blackmail and oh don't forget also accused him of being gay.. Bad News Indeed."