Christmas is to come in exactly 10 days. Akari Akaza hummed a tune as she decorated the Amusement Club teahouse. She adorned the walls with wreaths and other assortments of christmas decor, and wrapped presents for her fellow club members. She has painstakingly sourced for gifts that best suit each and every one of her individual friends; Kyouko gets a Mirakurun figurine, Yui gets a new book, while Chinatsu gets nada because she no hablas espanol. Akari smiled happily, picturing in her mind the look of pleasant surprise when her friends receive her gifts.

The day before christmas. Akari Akaza paced around with anticipation as she awaited her friends' arrival. She had told them the night before her plan to celebrate christmas in the teahouse. They were all agreeable to it.

As the sun steadily descends into the shadows of the night, Akari felt increasingly agitated. It was already 7 in the evening! All her friends were supposed to be in the teahouse by 5? Did they by any chance forget about her?

"Uwuuuuu I bet they forgot my existence."

Wallowing in self-pity, Akari decided to play Lesbian Simulator on her phone. At that moment, she received a phone call, which startled the poor girl and caused her to toss her phone in midair and thereafter struggling to keep the phone from slipping off her hands.

"Moshi moshi? Akari desu."

"Yui, Kyouko, Chinatsu, they're all dead!"

"Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?!1?1?!"

Akari could not believe her ears. She immediately broke down into tears.

Out of grief, she decided to become a prostitute. Becoming a prostitute over the holdays historically proves to be a lucrative and robust business scheme. Problem is, Akari specialised in Lesbian Prostitution. Business was non-existent, because lesbians are fictional characters that exist only in films, books, and the figments of our imagination. Her profit margin was zero dollars. Hence she starved to death.

While we bitch about our live all the time, we must appreciate the fact that there are many around us who could only wish to have half of what we have. Take Akari, for example, a girl who only wished to spent Christmas with her friends, yet got her hopes crushed by a cruel twist of fate which subsequently subjected her to prostitution. When even that fails, she realised that her life is a giant pile of screw ups. It is also at this juncture that we realise and reflect on our relatively well-off state, cherish and appreciate it, and dispel whatever discontent we may harbor for the entity we call life. Life is a bitch at times. But at least it is not the type of bitch that kills all your friends and force you into promiscuity. Merry Christmas!