Louis knocked on the door twice, shuffling his feet in place and looking down. He hadn't been to this room in a long time, he realized, and that made him sad. He and Violet had been best friends for almost half their lives, but Minnie's death had hit Violet pretty hard. She'd closed herself off, even to her best friend.
The blonde girl opened the door and appeared in front of Louis, groggily rubbing her eyes. He'd forgotten she had they day off today, and had most likely been taking a nap. Taking mental note to memorize her schedule for next time, he smiled at her.
"What the fuck do you want?" Violet snapped, getting straight to the point.
"I, uh," paused Louis, pursing his lips. "I need some help," he said finally.
"What kind of help?" she mumbled, blinking rapidly as the sleep left her.
"It's about Clementine," he said, scratching the back of his head and avoiding her eyes.
Violet would have sooner slammed the door on him, but she knew that Louis never stumbled on his words unless it was something really serious. With a tired sigh, she stepped back and let her friend through, closing the door behind him.
Louis looked around her room and examined its design. It wasn't unlike the rest of the other dorms in shape, but it was organized quite differently. A single bed was perched in a corner beside the closet, where a small number of clothes were stored. Old posters of rock bands hung loosely on the wall opposite her bed, their tape wearing off after years of decay.
He spotted a chair near the desk that stood next to the bed, and snatched it up. Turning it around, he sat down on it and sighed, "I need your help, Vi."
"I think we've already established that, Louis," Violet grumbled. She took a seat at her bed and crossed her legs on it.
"Yeah, sorry," he apologized, "I just get the feeling that Clementine's mad at me, you know?"
Violet studied him for a moment before cracking a grin, "Well, it wouldn't be unlike you to make someone mad," she teased.
"I'm serious, Vi."
"So am I," she assured him, crossing her heart. When he didn't laugh, she closed her eyes, "Okay, what did you do exactly?"
"I don't think I did anything. A couple of days ago she was fine," he explained, his hand gestures telling the tale with him. "She was even joking around with me about my piano, can you believe it?"
"Actually, I can," she stated, "As much as I hate to admit it, you guys do make a cute couple."
Louis smiled at her, running a hand through his dreads. He remembered the talks he and Violet used to have in this very room, after everyone had gone to sleep. It was around the time the apocalypse started that they had become almost as close as Louis and Marlon were. They shared everything, and kept nothing from each other.
"We do, don't we?" he said, earning a pillow in the face from Violet. "But anyway, the next day Clem would not even look at me. She hasn't said a word to me in three days," he exclaimed.
Violet considered this for a moment, scratching her chin in a similar manner to how Louis did it. When she looked back at him, it was with a raised eyebrow, "Have you asked AJ about it?"
"I have, actually," he assured her, "He says he doesn't know, but he seems to be keeping his distance from her too."
Violet thought about his words and looked at him. She could tell he was worried, his features creased into a frown foreign to his face. "Maybe she just needs some space," she suggested, unsure of what to say.
Louis frowned, looking down at his hands, "Do you think it's her, uh," he paused, his cheeks reddening, "time of the month?"
The blonde girl chuckled throatily and shook her head, "Sometimes you can be such an idiot, Lou. And no, it's not her 'time' yet."
"How do you know?" Louis queried.
"Women just know this stuff," she replied, shrugging it off by way of explanation.
He decided to leave the matter there and closed his eyes, burying his head in his hands. This whole situation was stupid, Louis thought. What could he have possibly done to upset Clementine? He racked his brain for any recollection of a stupid joke, or inappropriate comment he might have made, but came up empty.
"Louis?" Violet's voice broke through his thoughts. "How are you?" she asked, genuine concern in her voice.
He didn't know how to answer that question, actually. For the past three months, his head had been a complete jumble of emotions. He couldn't even place which of those emotions dominated his mind at any given time, let alone display it properly.
"I don't know," he let out, breathing out heavily.
"You can give me better than that, can't you?" Violet encouraged, offering him a sad smile.
It was at times like this that Louis lifted the jester's masquerade, and showed his true feelings. That, and the times he spent with Clementine. Both of them had a power to pull Louis out of his shell, and let him become vulnerable, for he knew they only meant well, and would pull him up with them if he needed.
"You're talking about Marlon, aren't you?" he whispered, lifting his head and looking directly into her eyes. He had told her numerous times that they looked like a thunderstorm, the power of electricity contained within her irises.
"Yeah, and about Clem. I know you forgave her, but I don't know if you've forgiven yourself," she observed.
"What do you mean by that?" he retorted, raising an eyebrow expectantly.
"Ever since Marlon you've basically only had two emotions: annoyingly happy and downright depressed."
He scrunched up his nose and looked down, "Well I think that's a little bit extreme."
"No, Lou, it's the truth." She sat up and grabbed another chair, drawing it closer to him and sitting down. "You know you can talk to me about it, right?"
"Yeah, I know," he said, "I'm sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry about," she said slowly, her brows knitting close. "Just take a deep breath and tell me what's up."
He did as she said, and filled his lungs with air. It felt as though he hadn't breathed for months, and was just now getting accustomed to the feeling. He let it all out slowly, and looked back up, where brown eyes met grey ones.
"I just feel sad," he began, "I don't know how to explain it. When I'm with Clem it goes away a little, but it's always there. It's like a sheet that covers me, and I can't lift it off me. And I get a feeling it's Marlon, trying to tell me something. I can still see him in my dreams sometimes."
Vi pursed her lips and stretched an arm, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder. In the past, it had always been the other way round, she realized then. She would have some problem or other, and he would be on her beck and call, taking her mind off it. At that moment, she wished she had picked up some of his skills as a listener.
"And are they nightmares?" she asked quietly, as if she was afraid he'd run off otherwise.
"Sometimes they are," he admitted, "Sometimes it's just memories of when we were kids. Like that time he and I found that deer skull outside the school and tried to scare you guys with it," he chuckled, a grin tugging at his lips.
"I remember that," she told him, "you guys were dicks sometimes," she teased, relieved that some color was returning to his face.
"Yeah we were," he agreed, "And now Clem has a skull just like it in our room." He shuddered at the thought, which made Violet giggle. It was an odd sound, coming from the blonde, but a welcome one nonetheless.
Silence fell on them as they each delved into their own thoughts. Louis thought about Marlon first; about all the stupid pranks they'd played over the years, and the stupid arguments they'd had. They all seemed so meaningless now, in retrospect. He couldn't forget the things his friend had done, though, and that was one of the reasons this whole situation was tearing him apart.
Next, to keep his mind from wandering too far, he thought of Clementine. He thought of her recent attitude, and chastised himself for not being able to cheer his girlfriend up. He'd tried everything, but she would just say she was busy and blow him off. Something was bothering her; perhaps even more so than Marlon was bothering Louis…
"Remember those time you'd come to my room at night," she said suddenly, pulling his from his thoughts, "and you'd do bits and impressions to cheer me up?
"Yeah, you used to love those."
"Kind of, yeah," she conceded, "but what I actually looked forward to was being with you, Louis. You saw that I was afraid, and you didn't hesitate to come and spend time with me. I will always remember what you did for me, and that's what Clem needs now, Lou."
"What, you want me to go and perform a song for her?" he asked, only party sarcastically.
"No, just go and be there for her. Let her know you'll do anything, but don't pressure her," she suggested. Louis scratched his chin and raised an eyebrow at her.
"When did you become Dr. Phil?" he teased her with a smile.
"Dr. who?"
"No, not Dr. Who; Dr. Phil," he corrected, "He was this guy who gave marriage and relationship advice on TV."
Violet stared at him with an amused expression, and he rolled his eyes, "My mom used to watch him all the time, okay?" told her, making her laugh.
"You know Louis, I'm glad I have you," she said suddenly, startling, "I know I may not show it half the time, but you really helped me through those first years. I don't think I would have survived without you," she trailed off, rubbing her arm and looking away.
"I didn't know you had this mushy side, Vi" he teased, smirking. She punched him on the shoulder and rolled her eyes.
"You know what I mean. What I'm trying to say is… thank you," she muttered, looking back up at him.
Louis knew when Violet was being sincere, and this was one of those times. He saw it in the way her shoulders relaxed as she spoke, in the way her mouth curved upwards naturally, in the way she fidgeted with her fingers nervously. Leaning in, he stretched his arms and embraced Violet in a hug, conveying into it all the words that would have remained unspoken otherwise.
"You're welcome," he whispered back, patting her back softly.
As they broke off, both smiling, Violet said, "I think you should go find your girlfriend."
"I think you're right," he agreed, standing up and heading for the door.
"Go get her, tiger," she teased as he exited, a lingering grin set on her face.
Louis went outside and looked around, searching for her signature blue hat against the orange of the leaves and trees. He walked the perimeter, and found her standing in the middle of the graveyard. She was staring blankly at Marlon's grave, her mind probably a flurry of emotions.
"Hey," he said from behind her, startling her. When she turned around, he noticed she had tears in her eyes, and he immediately went to her. "What happened, Clem?" he asked her, wiping the tears from her face with his thumb.
"I – nothing," she mumbled, looking down.
"C'mon, if you're crying it's gotta be huge," he tried to joke, lightening the mood a bit when she smiled.
He led her to the benches by the graveyard and they both sat down opposite each other. Before she could start, Louis held out his hand and took hers in it. To his relief, she didn't pull away. "What happened?" he urged, pursing his lips.
"It's just," she paused, looking around, "What day is it?" she asked suddenly.
"Uh, I believe it's October 31st," he affirmed, a small smile forming at his lips, "Hey, it's Halloween."
Clem, however, was not smiling, "That's what I feared," she whispered.
Sensing the air, Louis dropped his grin and raised an eyebrow at her, "Why, what happens on Halloween?" he inquired innocently.
"It's not today, but tomorrow," she corrected him. Sighing deeply, she said, "November 1st is the day Lee died," she choked, fresh tears trickling from her eyes. Louis's eyes opened wide and he gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
"I'm sorry, Clem," was all he could say, looking down abashed. Whatever it had been, he hadn't been expecting this.
"It's okay," she mumbled, "I just get emotional around this time of the year, you know?"
"I understand," he said, nodding, "You know, I don't think you've told me much about Lee," he commented.
Clementine perked up at that. No one had ever really asked her about Lee, and she wasn't used to talking about it. But Louis was different, wasn't he? He had to be. Sniffing loudly, she wiped the tears from her eyes and forced a smile onto her face.
"What do you want to know?" she asked, making him smile. He thought about it for a moment before saying,
"What was he like?"
"He was good. Like, genuinely good. He found me in my tree house in the first days, and when he found out my parents weren't home, he promised me he'd take care of me."
"I'd say he did a pretty good job," Louis commented.
"He did," she agreed, nodding, "He was basically the leader of our group, but he would always find time to help me with anything I needed."
"How so?" he asked her, genuinely curious as she talked of her mysterious past.
"One time, for example, I had lost my hat. And he went out of his way on a scouting mission to find it," she retold with a smile, tapping her hat.
"He sounds like a great guy," Louis put in.
"He protected me until his death, tearing through half of Savannah to find me. This creepy man had kidnapped me, and that's when Lee was bitten. Because of me," she added softly, fresh unbidden tears replacing the previous ones.
"No Clem, it wasn't your fault," he objected, shaking his head and taking her hand again.
"But it was," she exclaimed, louder than she meant to. "If I hadn't been so stupid, he wouldn't have gotten bit."
"Clem, you were eight," he reminded her, "It's not like you did it on purpose knowing what would happen, right?"
"Well, no but –," she conceded.
"Exactly," interrupted Louis, "You didn't know, and that's what's important, you hear me?"
"I guess," she muttered, looking down.
Louis looked at her, defeated expression on her face and tears streaking down her cheeks, and his heart shattered. He had never seen Clementine this broken, and it killed him to know that there was nothing he could do.
Or was there?
"Hey Clem?" he whispered, getting the girl's attention, "What was Lee's last name?"
Confused by the question, Clementine raised an eyebrow, "Everett," she answered warily. "Why?"
Before she could get the question out, Louis was already on his feet. A big smile had returned to his face, and a plan was forming in his mind. "Clem, I need you to do something for me, okay?"
"What is it?" she inquired, confused about his newfound enthusiasm.
"Alright, I need you to meet me tomorrow at the gate at 9pm," he instructed, studying her confused expression. "You're not gonna regret it."
"What are you doing, Louis?"
"Ah, one more thing," he added as he turned around and headed for the gate, "You can't ask any questions!" he called back before disappearing into the night.
Clem spent all night in her room, thinking about the weird conversation she'd had with Louis that evening. For a while, he had been supportive, and Clem was thankful that he had asked about Lee. It wasn't often that she got to talk to someone about her protector, and she welcomed the memories as they came back.
She was reminded of the time they visited St. John's Dairy, and Lee had teased her about licking that saltlick. The time he had found her hat, and she had thanked him with a big hug. The time he taught her how to shoot a gun…
She thought back to all the people that had come after him, and wondered why it was that Lee had left such an impact on her. She had definitely been with Christa longer than she had been with Lee, and Kenny had stayed with her until she and AJ were let into Wellington. But in her mind, Lee's voice always rose above them, guiding her through the darkest of times. She could still hear his deep soothing voice, letting her know everything would be alright.
Then, her mind wandered over to her boyfriend. The boyfriend that had sprinted off into the night and had not yet come back. She was starting to get worried, but she knew Louis could handle himself out there. He had before, right? Clementine wondered what had excited Louis so much that it had to be done tonight.
She also thought about his cryptic message: "Meet me at the gate at 9pm."
"What's that supposed to mean?" she said to herself, "Is he trying to cheer me up?"
"Well, if he is, he's doing a crappy job," she replied, realizing only then that she was talking to herself again. "Good job Clementine, you're losing your mind."
After that, she decided to stay silent and close her eyes. She couldn't sleep, though. She'd survived all these years without having to rely on Lee, right? Why was the fact that he'd died on this day eight years ago bothering her so much? Though her morbid thoughts haunted her, the face of Lee Everett floated to the front of her consciousness, and she was able to get some sleep.
The following day, Clem spent her free time reading. Aasim was nice enough to show her some interesting books from their collection, and she perched herself on the loveseat in the music room, a book open in front of her.
It was a book called 'Harry Potter'. She flipped through the pages, basking in the world contained in the pages. She'd frowned when she realized there were no pictures in it, but she was enjoying it nonetheless. She'd barely read fifty pages when Aasim came into the room, knocking on the doorframe to get her attention.
She looked up at him, a pleasant smile on her face. She found that she hadn't thought about Lee all day, and almost gasped when she looked out the window. It was completely dark out, and a cloudless sky sported a beautiful full moon. She looked back at Aasim, who raised an eyebrow awkwardly.
"Uh, Louis said he's waiting for you at the gate," he informed her.
Clem shot up, dropping the book onto the floor, "Shit, what time is it?"
"I think it's about 8:45," he replied, checking his own watch. She relaxed at that, and thanked Aasim for letting her know. Walking out, she spotted Louis leaning against the one of the columns of the gate, whistling a tune.
"I still had fifteen more minutes, you know?" she teased as she got to him, one hand on her hip.
"Really? I could have sworn it was 9:30," he said, scratching his chin. "Never mind that, we have a trip ahead of us."
"Where are we going anyway?"
"Clem, what was the last thing I said to you last night?"
"Don't ask any questions," she huffed, crossing her arms.
"Bingo! And that rule shall hold until we get where we're going," he declared, walking forward into the forest.
They walked for the better part of an hour, Louis's jokes and riddles filling the silence. When he announced they were close, Clem looked around and frowned. The forest here didn't look any different than the rest of the way.
"Where is here?" she asked, gesturing around her.
"Here," he repeated, approaching a wall of tall grass that grew on the west side of the clearing they stood in, "is here," he declared with grandeur, pushing the ferns aside.
Beyond the tall grass stood a small cottage in the middle of yet another clearing. To its right, a path of candles, most of them burnt out, lit the way into the backyard. "Sorry, we took longer than I expected," he gestured to the unlit candles. She smiled and followed him up the path, admiring the effort he'd put in.
At the end of it, they arrived at a small lake. Clem looked around in awe and stared at Louis, "What is this?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper.
"Patience, my dear," he teased, smiling. She rolled her eyes and walked toward him. He stood in front of a rock and beside a mound of dirt beside the lake. She eyed the contraption and frowned.
"What is this, Louis?" she repeated, looking back up at him.
"This," he gestured to the rock on the ground, "is a grave. Lee's grave to be exact."
"What the –," she whispered, trailing off when she noticed the carvings on the rock itself. At the top read 'Here lies Lee Everett' in an untidy scrawl. Beneath that line was another: 'father and protector to Clementine Everett'
"Sorry, I didn't know your last name," he told her sheepishly. "I wanted you to have a place where you could say your goodbyes. Your proper goodbyes," he corrected himself, placing a hand on her shoulder.
But Clementine could not speak. Tears welled in her eyes as she read the inscription over and over again, her golden eyes lingering on her own name at times. Clementine Everett. It sounds good, she thought with a smile.
"You did this for me?" she whispered, looking back at the dreaded boy beside her.
"I know how much he meant to you, Clem. And I wanted you to have a way to pay your respects," he added, producing from behind his back an assortment of various flowers, none identical to the last.
She took them gingerly in her arms and knelt down beside the grave. Clem placed them next to the gravestone, and then stood back up. Louis's arm wrapped itself around her, and Clem perched her head on his shoulder. "It's beautiful, Lou," she told him, never taking her eyes off it. "Thank you."
"Anything for you, Clementine," he reminded her, kissing the top of her head, "I actually have one last surprise for you."
"Seriously?" she exclaimed, baffled. Had he worked all day on this?
"Seriously," he repeated. Louis stepped back and dug through a hedge of tall grass. When he found what he was looking for, he retrieved his arm. In his hand was a rather small globe apparently made out of some sort of fabric. On its base was a lantern, still unlit.
"What's that?" she repeated. She found herself staring at Louis rather than the lantern. Watching the way his smile lit up the place brighter than the candles on the ground.
"This is a New Years Eve lantern," he informed her, walking forward and standing beside her, the lantern held tightly in his hand.
"What is a New Years Eve lantern?" she said, confused.
"It's something people used to do on New Year's; where they'd light this lantern, make a wish and let it fly away," he explained, gesturing to the small candle at the bottom of the lantern.
"You're totally fucking with me."
"Nah, I'm serious," he promised her, "Swear on my piano," he added, crossing his heart.
Clem chuckled and shook her head, admiring the odd contraption. How Louis had found one of these intact was beyond her, but she appreciated the effort it must have taken. They walked to the edge of the waters, small waves tickling their boots, and kneeled. Clementine took a lighter out of her back pocket and handed it to Louis, who lit the candle.
She marveled at how fast the globe seemed to light up, casting shadows over both of them. As they stood up, Louis released it into the wind, the autumn breeze taking it far away slowly. They watched it go for a couple of seconds, before Louis turned to her.
"Wanna say a few words?" he whispered. Clementine nodded silently and looked up at the sky, the orb of light another star in the cosmos.
"Lee," she began, fighting back tears as they watched the lantern ascend, "I miss you every day, wishing you'd survived. I can still hear your voice, guiding me toward a better path. I hope that wherever you are, I've made you proud of who I've become. I'll never forget what you did for me." She took Louis's hand in hers and squeezed it tightly, a beaming smile lighting up her face, the same way the lantern lit up the night sky.
"Thank you, sir," Louis whispered suddenly, startling Clementine, "for protecting Clementine with your life. I wish I had been able to meet you, cause you sound like an awesome dude," he added with a sideways smile at Clem. "Thank you for bringing Clementine into my life and thank you for your sacrifice."
Unbidden tears were not filling Louis's eyes, who wiped at them furiously. After that final speech, they stayed silent as they admired the clear night sky. A light breeze was picking up, which gave them goose bumps, but they didn't care. They only needed each other's warmth, basking in each other's company.
"That was beautiful," she whispered, her eyes glued to the sky like a magnet. Louis looked to his left and grinned, his chocolate brown eyes sparkling with love.
"You're beautiful."