A/N: A MAN LIVES!

A MAN RETURNS FROM WORK!

A MAN WEEPS AT GAME OF THRONES AND HER ENDING!

Long story short? I saw the ending. It was...well. An ending. Some have been more...vocal about it than most. What about Gilly? What about Daario? Or Essos? Did they skip ahead somehow? It felt like they skipped ahead and the characters were suddenly OLDER-Robin, Yara, Brienne, Podrick-all of a sudden. It just feels...a little rushed by the end there, you know? Sorry, I'm just not sure how to feel about it.

In other news, I may soon have another writing partner, which will make divvying up updated stories easier.

As to why I haven't been able to update as regularly as I used to...well...first there's the fact that I have no time off this week. None! Which means almost zero time to write! AND EVERYONE WANTS GAME OF THRONES STORIES! Not to mention other updates! I'm trying! Nevermind the fact that I haven't gotten so much as a wink of sleep in the last two days, nevermind that I'm having another surgery soon, nevermind that I'm thousands of dollars in debt and still in CRIPPLING PAIN-

*takes a deep breath*

Sorry, that might be the sleep deprivation talking.

So here's an interlude while I head to work. Assuming I don't crash.

Obviously I own no lines, references, or quotes associated with other media.

Remember, this is the PREQUEL to the Not Going Home series. Hope it makes you smile!

Mild warning for Tayuya's foul mouth because this is TAYUYA we're talking about. Censoring her makes no sense~!

"What is normality? What is sanity?

What makes us throw it away like old newspaper?

Simple. One bad day, friend. You see, that's really all that it takes."

~?

One Bad Day (Interlude)

Ain't that the truth?

All it takes is one bad day.

Tayuya knew that better than most. She already had her bad day. She was still living it here and now; at this very moment. It only took one bad day to ruin your life. And to think it had all started off so well, too! It felt like victory had been pried from her grasp at the last moment, leaving her to grasp at straws in the vain hope of survival.

Damn windy woman. She'd get her if it was the last thing she did.

Now with each passing second the last living member of the Sound Four found herself shifting impatiently in her chair-well, as much as a girl with no broken legs could shift-and waiting impatiently as her companion continued his ill-advised search. Rooting through cellars and shelves and anything he could get his hands on, he had yet to utter so much as a single word to her since Under any other circumstance she might've found it funny. Now? With her flute smashed and her body broken, her chakra all but drained-even her mark-to the point of being stolen?

She just wanted to sleep.

Which was impossible in this hard-ass chair!

"Are you done yet?" she groaned through clenched teeth

This question, directed to her unlikely ally, bounded off the dirt brown walls of the facility and went unheard in the bowels of Orochimaru's laboratory. Well. Former laboratory she supposed. Now that the slippery snake and his potential host were naught but smears on the wall, she found she had no desire to rush after them into oblivion. Dead was dead-or undead in Naruto's case-and Tayuya was in no hurry to avenge either. Let them spin in the void for all she cared. What did she care for the dead?

She was quite attached to the living, thankyouverymuch!

Shame about the four-eyed bastard, though. He'd either been buried under rubble or managed to slip away at some point during the confusion. Tayuya was willing to thrown down serious coin on the latter. Kabuto was nothing in not resilient; it was all too likely that the sanin's aide had seen the destruction and turned tail like the coward he was. All well and good in her eyes, given that she couldn't fight her way out of a wet paper bag at the moment, and as for Naruto...

"Oi!" she clicked her tongue in exasperation at the thought of the recalcitrant blond, "Whiskers! You there?! I'm talking to you!"

An annoyed grunt answered her and an empty bottle sailed out of the cupboard to smack her forehead. Tayuya hissed and clutched at the rising welt there, but instinctively managed to duck when a full flask of something sailed over her head and shattered against a nearby wall with an acrid spatter. Her gaze snapped toward the sound, eyes widening as she watched the acid fizz and sputter furiously. That could have been her face.

"Hey!" she growled back at the blond. "Watch where you're throwing shit!"

Blue eyes poked over a shelf, accompanied by a sheepish smile.

...sorry."

"You will be if you hit me again, idiot!" she swore virulently. A thought occurred to her, then. "Found anything good while you were pillaging the place?"

His smile shrank somewhat.

...some. Not much."

"Aaand you're still talking like that." her expression collapsed into a deadpan frown as he ducked back down. "Did the Uchiha fry your brain, too?" Something in the way he flinched almost made her pity the blond. Just a tiny bit. Alright, a lot. Not that she was worried about him by any means or measure. Her heart certainly hadn't fluttered just now, she also swore.

No, not in the least!

It was a powerless thing indeed to be a kunoichi without her legs; galling as it might be, she understood that her days as a shinobi were likely ended. Without treatment she was little more than dead weight; and that was if one assumed it to even be possible. With both legs broken, and only the faintest sensation in either, she suspected she'd be paralyzed below the waist for rest of her days. Still...that was preferable to the alternative. If her legs weren't numb she suspected she'd be in a world of pain right now. Once the bones were mended and the shock wore off...

Still, after having a tree dropped on her, the redhead was quite happy to do without for awhile.

Less so when Naruto popped out of hiding with a triumphant shout.

"Aha!"

Her gaze flitted to him as he bounded upright.

It wasn't armor in the true sense of the word, more like...parts. A ramshackle assortment of black leather and metal no doubt intended to help hold his failing body together, coupled with an ungainly breathing apparatus of sorts to aid his mangled lungs and keep him breathing. Even then it wasn't wholly complete, nor had he donned it in its entirety. For now it was merely a dark harness hooked over Naruto's battered right arm and into his sundered chest. At least, Tayuya surmised that this its their purpose. The smallest blue spark skittered over his shoulders as he fiddled with a dark helmet, only to set it aside when he couldn't force it to fit.

"You look like a cyborg, dipshit." a small laugh escaped her despite her best efforts to resist.

The pale smile he granted her hurt her heart.

...thanks, I think?"

She considered the technology for a long moment as he set more of it aside, discarded some, and kept the rest. Anything made by Orochimaru was not be trusted of course. He collected all manner of strange technology from gods knew where-and how little she knew of that!-but surely...? Ah. As she looked on her captor-what else could she call him?-plucked something from a shelf and darted to her. Gloves. Why would he need gloves that thin? And why was he handing her a clean white rag?

"Bite this." he instructed her sternly.

"Hweh?" she huffed. "The hell? What the hell're you doing?"

...fixing your legs." He paused, considering her for a long moment. "Try not to move."

Tayuya bristled as he laid a hand on her limp thigh, feeling for the bone beneath. "The hell? I don't see how-AAARGH!"

Her back arched with an explosive hiss as her companion set a spasm of light shooting through her thigh. He tried to set the bone a heartbeat later and she immediately headbutted him for it. If the undead blond felt any pain he did little to show it; rather his attention merely shifted to her other leg. She had half a second to stuff the rag into her mouth before he reached in and did the same to the opposite limb. Whatever it was, it brought sensation back with a roaring, howling vengeance and made her spit it back out with a shriek.

...told you not to move." his expression never wavered but Tayuya swore he was mocking her, she just knew it. Sparky bastard...!

"You better hope this kills me, sparky~!" she hissed, grabbing him by the face. "Because if it doesn't...your ass is mine! You hear me?! You cheeky little-aargh!" A raw, raging red wave of agony seized Tayuya before she could think to threaten him further, drowning out all semblance of words and thought.

Her last coherent thought was to flip him off before she passed out.

Even then, that faint, halting voice stayed with her.

"Well." he blinked. "That's...just rude, that is."

She'd make him pay for that later.

In bloody red spades.

A/N: Yes.

The armor is a what you think it is, its a deliberate joke and reference to Vader on my part.

There we go.

You're getting a Lannister story after this, dear readers, so please be kind and ease up on the requests. I can only get so many done in a fornight. I'm also in a lot of pain right now, so I apologize for the lack of an author's note down here. Hope you enjoy it. Now excuse me while I writhe in agony. Ciao~!

So in the Immortal Words of Atlas...

...Review, Would Ya Kindly?

And enjoy the previews!

Well, potential ones.

I OWN NOTHING.

(Preview)

"Owowowow! That hurts!"

It was the most he'd said all afternoon. Stitching a wound of that caliber-much less one in his chest-was no mean feat even with medical knowledge. Considering she knew jack all in the field of medical ninjutsu, stitches, staples, and an unhealthy amount of gauze would have to do. Something to which Naruto protested most stringently.

Tayuya was all smiles. "Its gonna hurt! This is payback for my legs!"

"Of course I'm mad. I'm just smart enough to admit it."

R&R~! =D