A/N: Alright here is chapter three. I've been working hard on revisions on my original work manuscript so this took a back seat but I finally finished this chapter. As always let me know your thoughts! (Still looking for a Beta Reader)

Feyre

Reliving events for a second time was boring. I had never realized how not knowing what a day would bring is what made life interesting. In fact I wished I didn't know what was coming and not because of the horrors of the mountain but because I just wanted to hide in my room and not come out. I didn't want Tamlin to fall in love with me and I only wanted Rhysand. So I tried to forget but I couldn't. I let the days run one into the others until a head stared back at me in the garden.

I blinked. How long ago had Rhys left it there? I looked around as if he would jump out from behind a bush. But there was no sign of him. I turned back to the head and spotted the note a foot away from it. I jumped forward and closed my fingers around it.I shoved the note into my pocket as I stared at the head with his mouth still opened and the brown eyes. Part of me had forgotten the things Rhys had to do to keep those he loved safe. I took a step back away from the head and slammed into Tamlin. I whirled.

"It's me," he said. I dropped my hands. Lucien stood beside him with that pale and grim face.

"Not Autumn Court," he said. "I don't recognize him at all."

Tamlin's hands clamped on my shoulders as I turned back to look at Rhysand's handiwork.

"Neither do I."

I watched Lucien as he stepped into the pool of blood and I swallowed. The blood. Oh Caludron the blood. And then something changed. I lost it. I barely heard their words.

"A mountain with three stars-"

"Night Court."

"Feyre?"

All I saw was blood. Blood on my hands and the ground and on Lucien. I tried to stagger back but Tamlin was still there with a tight hold on my shoulders. "What's wrong with her?"

"I don't know. Maybe mortals minds can't handle this kind of horror?"

Everything went black.

I woke up in my room alone. At least Tamlin had blamed my mental breakdown on being mortal and not asking why the hell she had such a reaction to the sight of blood.I pulled the note from pocket and looked down at it. I saw the elegant script of my mate but I couldn't read it. I squinted at it but I couldn't read. Despite remembering my lessons with Rhys I couldn't read again. Well, this was just great. I had a note from him that I couldn't read but Tamlin could or anyone else if they found it. I'd have to burn it.

I pushed myself from bed and stumbled towards the fire. I squatted in front of the fire and held my fist out but I couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. I pulled back my hand and stood up. I needed to read this note.

I stuffed the note into my pocket and walked out of my room. The hall was empty and I walked down the dark hall and found my way to the library. Inside the library I picked up one of the children's books and stumbled through it one word at a time until I could read it without staring at a particular word for more than a minute. It didn't take long for me to grow frustrated. It was taking me too long. It'd take me weeks to get back to where I'd been before I'd left the Spring Court. I pulled the note out of my pocket again and stared at it.

I'm sorry you — that was all I could read. I sighed. I should just burn it before it was accidentally found. I returned to my room and this time I let the paper slip from my fingers and into the flames. I watched as the flames licked the paper and it turned brown then black. When the only thing that remained of the note was ash I climbed back into bed and sobbed. They would think it was from seeing the head and the blood. In reality it was being separated from my mate and having to endure these events again. That's when I realized something had changed.

The door opened and Tamlin stood there wide eyed. This was new too. I needed to talk to Rhys. What if Amarantha didn't send him and Tamlin didn't send me away?

"Feyre, I'm sorry you had to see that," he said.

"I'm sorry I freaked out."

"You are human," he said as if this explained it.

"Humans aren't as weak as you think,"I said. "I've just not been myself since I came here."

Tamlin stared at me and then in a low whisper said, "I know."

I stared at him and blinked. Did he mean…? "Know what?"

"I know you're not weak. You're far from it." I blinked again. "Feyre I'm sorry."

"For what?" My heart thudded in my chest as he took a step closer. Did he remember after all? Perhaps we were all cursed.

"I'm sorry I acted the way I did. When I woke up in a house full of servants I thought…I thought I was getting a chance to try again and to fix where I'd gone wrong. Perhaps I could win you this time."

Perhaps I could win you this time.

I was not a prize. I was not his prize.

"You remember," I whispered.

"How could I forget what we went through?" he asked and took a step closer.

"Stay back," I said and pulled my knees to my chest.

"Fey-re," the last syllable broke off in an almost sob.

"Tamlin. I don't know why the hell we're back here but I still love Rhys. I will die for him and I know you're sorry but you locked me up after what I went through down there. Maybe you were just trying to protect me but I'm not your prize. I'm not anyones prize."

"Feyre, I'm sorry. I was just as broken as you after Amarantha."

"Yes, but instead of us healing together you gave up on me and locked me up like some weak human. I loved you and you gave up on me. I went through hell for you."

"I know," he covered his mask with his hands and weeped. I took a breath and calmed my temper. "I just want to earn your forgiveness."

I stilled. Forgiveness. As if I could forgive what he'd done. It wasn't just the fact of locking me up in this house but he'd traded those I loved in a deal with Hybern to get me back. My stomach tightened and I thought I'd be sick for a moment before the nausea passed. At least I didn't have to pretend anymore.

"One day I may be able to forgive you but that day is not today. "

"Did something happen with Rhysand? Why are we back here?" Tamlin asked and dropped his hands from his face.

"I can't remember anything," I said and hugged myself. "Does Lucien remember?"

"Yes, but you'd played your part so well we thought you couldn't remember a thing. I've been holding him back from going to get Elain since we woke up the first day here."

Elain.

Elain would never be fae if Tamlin didn't betray us. If he planned to fix some of his mistakes this might be one of them. Perhaps it was for the best for Nesta though. But if Elain was never fae then Lucien would have to live without his mate. Not that their relationship had gone anywhere in the past months.

"Feyre," Tamlin said and stepped closer.

"Tamlin…please go."

He hesitated and then claws poking out of his hands he left the room. I took a deep breath. I needed Rhysand. Two days and I'd see him again. But the next two days seemed to drag by with Tamlin going to the border to deal with whatever it was at the border causing problems. Likely Amarantha or Rhysand. The summer solstice came but I didn't want to go. I didn't want to get dressed or spend time with Tamlin but perhaps it would give us time to talk and close up loose ends. Or at least form a plan for Amarantha because she was alive again. That alone was problem enough.

"Again I have to say —you look positively fae," Lucien said but didn't whistle.

"You two know you might be ruining the future by not saying and acting the same," I said.

"Oops?"

"Come on," Tamlin said and offered his hand. I took it for appearance sake but all I could think about was tomorrow. I would see Rhysand tomorrow.