The end :( I've had this chapter written for so long, and, as you do, I'm now worrying I haven't got it right after all! Callen and Sam are my favourites, so I hope I have done them justice here, and filled in some of Sam's journey of grief between S8 and S9.

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Sam turned furiously on Callen, waving the gun he still held wildly in Callen's face. "You didn't tell me!" he yelled. "They're my kids, and you lied to me!" Callen unconsciously took a step backwards. Sam armed and furious was an intimidating sight even to those who knew him.

"I didn't lie," Callen said calmly, working to even out his panting breaths as he wrapped an arm round his healing ribs.

"You didn't tell me you knew - you KNEW - those bastards know about my family! My KIDS were in danger, G, and you didn't tell me!" There was still a faint slur to Sam's words, and the lingering effects of the drugs flickered in his eyes.

"They weren't in danger as long as I did everything they wanted," Callen said placatingly.

"You still lied!" Sam was barely containing himself, balling his left fist angrily at his side while his right hand twitched on the weapon.

"I didn't lie, Sam. I just didn't tell you what you didn't need to know."

"What I…! Lies of omission are still lies, god dammit! What makes you get to decide what I needed to know?"

Callen shrugged, spreading his hands defencelessly, and his calm demeanour was suddenly too much for Sam, who let out all the pent-up frustrations of the past week and slammed the butt of the gun into Callen's jaw. Callen reeled backwards onto the floor and he supposed he should be thankful that the incapacitating drug still coursed Sam's veins, that his partner's full muscular power wasn't packed behind the furious punch. He ran his tongue across his split lip and recognised the familiar metallic taste of blood, but he didn't retaliate. He slowly stood up, and raised his hand to wipe the blood, looking Sam fully in the eyes.

"Tell me honestly, Sam, what good would it have done? If you had known? If you had known but been unable to do anything about it in that goddam cell? I was trying to protect you."

"I don't need protecting," Sam said sullenly. His shoulders started to lose some of their aggressive tension at last.

"I think in this case you did. I needed you focused Sam. I needed you to be able to help me get us out of here, not have you paralysed worrying about your family, or going off on some hell-bent mission of your own! They were in no danger while I was cooperating, and as soon as there was a risk, I called Eric and got a guard on them. I will ALWAYS protect your family, Sam. Always." Callen remained calm, but there was undeniable conviction in his voice, and Sam finally sighed and loosened his strained shoulders, and looked at Callen with a mix of sadness and shame in his eyes.

"I'm not like you, G," he said in a low voice, by way of apology. "I can't do what you do, compartmentalise the way you do."

"I…" Callen felt helpless. It was just who he was. Put things in a box in order to get a job done. He'd never had the family ties, the emotions that Sam had. He knew he came across as detached and cold sometimes. But he also knew it was necessary in order to be able to do the job he did, to be able to survive the positions he was often put in for the greater good. He shrugged, an explanation impossible.

Sam shook his head. "I'm sorry for hitting you."

"It doesn't matter."

"It does. You've had a hell of a week too, and somehow you've managed to get us both through it in one piece."

"Are we in one piece? Are we good, Sam?"

"We're good," Sam said gruffly, clumsily clapping his partner on the shoulder in an embarrassed gesture of apology. "We're good."

"Are you going to come back?"

"I…" Sam stumbled. "I'm still not ready G," he admitted. "I don't know if I ever will be. But I'm going to go visit the kids, and spend some time on my own… and maybe we'll see."

"Okay," Callen responded lightly. He recognised that pushing Sam now would not bring him back, but only push him yet further away. He reached out his hand to take the weapon and Sam passed it to him with an air of finality. His eyes hovered sadly over the cut on Callen's lip. Callen saw the direction of his gaze, and spoke light-heartedly, with a ghost of his trademark smirk in place. "Say hi to Kam and Aiden, and let me know when you're back... I'll stop by for that beer. God knows we deserve one!"

Turning to leave, Sam gave him a small smile that didn't reach his eyes.

Callen watched as his partner shunned the attentions from the hovering ambulance crew and walked slowly, desolately, away. Free now from physical chains, but trapped still inside a changed soul. Back to the beach, back to loneliness, back to a future without his wife and family around him. Callen desperately hoped Sam's future wouldn't be without his work family too, but time, only time would tell, and though it pained him, time was all that Callen could now give his grieving friend.

The loneliest walk you'll ever take is the one down the road of grief…