A few warnings for this fic: Mpreg | Intersex | Unplanned Pregnancy | Identity Porn

Summary: With the positive test held loosely in his hand, Kakashi struggled not to panic. He was pregnant. He had whelped. There was a tiny baby growing inside him.

Oh Kami, Kakashi cursed, his face growing paler beneath his mask, he was pregnant with an Akatsuki member's baby.

[insert me cackling] i got hit with this idea after reading the absolutely amazing "take the fire out" by kotoamatsu. its a/b/o and takes the sukea/tobi premise and makes it wonderful. far better than this garbage, GO READ IT

i liked the whole 'they dont knows its the other person' trope, so have some 'oops im pregnant' trope thrown into it.

Honeypot

It's not Kakashi's first honeypot mission. Not by a long shot. It is one of his more unique assignments, he'll give it that. The Akatsuki were secretive enough that even Jiraiya wasn't getting a lot of information on exactly who each individual member was.

Tsunade eventually sent him out to the last known siting of one of the Akatsuki teams—Deidara and the newest member Tobi—with the instructions to use all of his assets to get any information he could. He knows a henge might be enough to trick some civilians, but seeing as the two were S-ranked missing-nin, Kakashi opted to put on his Sukea disguise.

It worked in getting him close enough to the pair in a bar that he was able to strike up conversation with the two. Deidara was rather self-absorbed, and seemed to be too busy with his own self importance to respond to Kakashi's flirting, but his partner, Tobi, was much more receptive.

The bumbling shinobi act was obviously fake, Kakashi wasn't an idiot, but he let the masked man put on a show of awkwardly flirting back. His appearance seemed to get some type of flustered reaction out of the man, enough that he stuttered a few times in a genuine way. Kakashi, while understanding that he was part of an organization after Naruto, still felt a little flattered.

Tobi had mentioned a few off hand comments that a civilian would've missed, but Kakashi picked up on. When Amegakure is mentioned, Kakashi knows he's gotten a huge clue on the Akatsuki and their origin. While Tobi doesn't seem to suspect Kakashi can do anything with this information, he does seem to realize what he just said and instead shifts the talk to 'Sukea's' photography work. Kakashi smiles and asks Tobi if he would like to go back to his room.

Kakashi doesn't regret going through with it. While he never sees Tobi's face, he does get a look at his body and is welcome to an interesting site. The man is fit, he would have to be, but there is a distinct difference between the left and right half of his body. Kakashi makes sure to make an interested face—a civilian would notice the skin tone differences—but says nothing, making sure to meet Tobi's eye through the eye hole in his mask. A civilian would never have the gal to ask a shinobi about their injuries, frightened of the violence behind them, so Kakashi as Sukea stays quiet on the subject.

It's good, Kakashi has to admit. Tobi is eager and rough enough to make it fun while gentle enough that blood isn't drawn. Kakashi can admit that he wouldn't have minded a little more violence, but Sukea isn't the type of person that would be into pain play. It's a shame.

Kakashi pretends to fall asleep afterwards, sore and sated, and he doesn't 'stir' when Tobi gets up and leaves him not long after. Another successful honeypot mission under his belt.

He's puked for a week straight before he starts to suspect what exactly is wrong with him. It wasn't something Kakashi put much thought into, the physiology of the Hatake line, but he admits that maybe he should've before now.

The Hatake are a clan that put a lot more emphasis on power and intellect than on gender roles. Kakashi can distinctly remember his father's inquiries on Kakashi's feelings towards his identity. The Hatake clan put no stock into the sex of a person being their gender identity. Kakashi could have a penis and identify as female. The Hatake clan sported members throughout their history that included people with more than the one set of genitalia. Hatakes who have identified as men, who also have penises, have gotten pregnant in the past.

The thing is, Kakashi thinks with a grimace, he had been certain that he had known his own sexual organs. He was aware of the womb he carried, had known since his first medical examination as a newly minted shinobi, but he had been summarily informed that he was infertile. His predicament should be impossible.

Kakashi tilts his head over the toilet bowl once more, gagging, as more bile made its way up his throat.

Obviously not impossible.

With the positive test held loosely in his hand, Kakashi struggled not to panic. He was pregnant. He had whelped. There was a tiny baby growing inside him.

Oh Kami, Kakashi cursed, his face growing paler beneath his mask, he was pregnant with an Akatsuki member's baby.

Kakashi cursed his luck, tossing the test into the trash. He didn't even know who this Tobi was. He constantly wore that dumb mask and there had never been any village identifying clothing on his person. The only things Kakashi knows about him are that he's powerful enough to be part of the organization, that his cheerfulness is fake, and that he has some type of weird skin condition.

Kakashi sighs. Why is it always him?

dumb drabble is dumb, but no regrets

a small bit of headcanon on the hatake clan in this universe was thrown in because fuck it