A/N: Hi! This is the final chapter of this fic, but I may have something else in the works. I hope you enjoy this part, and please do drop me a comment and let me know! It's always helpful to have feedback from readers. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing!

All characters and their likenesses are property of Dick Wolf and NBCUniversal. The story and situations herein are a work of my imagination and I do not ascribe them to the official story of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit.

Strength in Vulnerability, Part 3

Peter could hear the soft murmur of Olivia's voice as she read to Noah a bedtime story. He couldn't make out what she was saying, but he could tell from the way her inflection changed that she was doing different character voices. He wanted to tiptoe closer to the partly closed bedroom door and get a better listen, but he was afraid he'd interrupt the Bensons' nighttime routine. He smiled to himself, delighting in now being privy to this softer side of Olivia, and instead busied himself by pouring two fresh glasses of wine.

He heard Olivia emerge from the boy's room, one last "I love you" whispered into the darkness.

"Two weeks ago that kid refused to look at me when I tucked him in. Now he's begging me every night for more snuggles", Olivia said as she rounded the sofa and took a seat next to Peter. She had one foot tucked under the opposite leg so she could face him, her elbow bent on the back of the couch, her head resting in her open palm.

When Peter didn't immediately respond, Olivia continued: "Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled we're back to normal but I can't coddle him for my own comfort and peace of mind…Wait, you probably have no idea what I'm talking about. Noah and I…for a few weeks there…nevermind". She waved her hand in front of her face in a dismissive manner.

Peter furrowed his brow but didn't press her. Instead he switched gears slightly. "Did you always want kids, Liv?", he asked as he picked up the two wine glasses, handing one to Olivia. She took a long sip.

"Short answer? Yes. Long answer? I don't want to bore you with that." More dismissive hand gestures.

"Nothing that you ever say will bore me, I can guarantee you that", Peter said resolutely. He could tell something was bothering Olivia, so he reached out to hold her fidgeting fingers, trying to calm whatever storm was brewing inside her.

"Liv, are you okay? If I said something that made you uncomfortable, then I'm so sorry". Peter made sure to make eye contact with her as he said this: "You can feel safe with me. You can say anything you want to me, anytime you want".

Olivia knew she didn't ever need permission to say what was on her mind, but Peter's words affected her. Olivia had always felt a false sense of security with all of the men she'd been with before; she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, and when it did, she blamed herself. She was aware that she never fully opened herself up in any of her relationships and that was the ultimate reason for each demise. Besides Noah, Olivia's heart was the thing she guarded most fiercely. After a lifetime of heartbreaks, she had no other choice.

But something was different about Peter Stone. And then it hit her: Peter's had his own lifetime of heartbreaks and he's still able to rip his heart out of his chest for others to see. He could hold it in front of you and let you experience all it had to offer. There was no rampart guarding the beat of his soul. Just last night he bared it all to Olivia and here he was, still standing tall. And because of that, because he knew she could handle him when he was defenseless and broken, because he trusted that she would pick him back up, Olivia realized that if she really tried, she could reciprocate. She knew she could be vulnerable, and Peter would never let her fall.

Olivia abruptly stood up from the couch, never letting go of Peter's hand. She tugged lightly, silently signaling that she wanted him to follow. They both set their wine glasses back on the coffee table, not caring that neither had taken more than one sip. Olivia led the way towards her bedroom, shutting off the last remaining light in the living space, flooding the apartment in darkness. The only light that remained was Noah's rocketship-shaped nightlight in the hallway between the two bedrooms.

Olivia entered her bedroom first but ushered Peter in quickly before shutting the door softly behind her. Peter heard the click of the lock, and a shiver ran the length of his body. He turned around to face Olivia, and although she was only partially illuminated by the moonlight streaming in from her window, he could see that she was crying.

Peter closed the small gap between them, enveloping Olivia in a hug. Kissing her temple he whispered in her ear, "I've got you, Olivia. Don't be afraid to fall".

And then she wasn't afraid; she wasn't afraid of falling and she wasn't afraid of being caught.

Olivia pulled back from Peter's hug but never fully broke contact. She looked into his eyes, blinked once, and whispered, "Please make love to me".

The visceral conviction in Olivia's eyes nearly caused Peter's legs to give out beneath him. He could see her chest rising and falling a bit more rapidly now, and Peter knew there was no doubt in her mind that this was what she wanted. And he was right; the invisible walls around Olivia were crumbling quickly, and she wanted, no needed, to become one with Peter, mind, body, and soul.

Peter reached for the hem of her green shirt, his fingers lingering on the soft skin beneath. He swallowed hard and closed his eyes as he committed this moment to memory. Olivia automatically lifted her arms and allowed the shirt to be guided over her head. As the shirt was tossed to the floor, her arms fell back down to her sides and for the first time in years she didn't feel the need to add a body disclaimer. It would be at this point that she would be very briefly explaining away the scars that were mapped out across the tops of her breasts and along her abdomen. She'd be quickly taking control so that her bed partner couldn't stare too long and couldn't ask any questions. But she let Peter look, she let him take her in and she reveled in it. She didn't say a word, because she knew Peter was seeing beyond her imperfections. He was seeing a story of one part of her life that he didn't know much about—but would eventually—and that both thrilled and terrified Olivia.

"You're beautiful, Olivia. Just fucking beautiful", Peter said as he ran his fingertips along her collarbone and down the side of her right breast. He took the fullness into his hand and squeezed, feeling her nipple harden beneath. She reached around her back and unclasped her cream-colored bra so that Peter could have unrestricted access, and as it fell to the floor she cupped his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

They moaned into one another, knowing they needed to speed up the process. Slow would come, but right now they needed to feel each other, needed the type of contact that only this level of intimacy can bring. Olivia dropped her hands from Peter's face, unbuttoning and unzipping her jeans. She pushed the denim down as far as she could reach but ultimately had to break the kiss in order to get them fully off. When she stood back up to full height, she noticed Peter had discarded his shirt and he was standing in front her, chest bare and flushed. Like magnets, Olivia's hands landed on him, roaming wildly over his toned form.

Peter grabbed both of her hands, stilling them. "Liv go lay on the bed."

She did as she was told, scooting backwards until her back hit the pillows, then reclining slightly so she could still watch Peter from her new position. Peter licked his lips as he toed off his shoes and made quick work of his jeans and boxer briefs. He crawled on his hands and knees up the bed toward Olivia, and when he saw her spread her legs to him he paused, letting the magnitude of the moment flow over him.

Peter sat back on his heels and watched Olivia. He was so close that he could see the goosebumps break out all over her.

Olivia's body was humming with anticipation. It made her shiver as if she was cold, but one touch of her skin would tell a different story. She was hot, and when she opened her legs she knew she was also dripping wet. She watched as Peter began moving again. This time it was just his hands that moved, slowly gliding from her ankles, up her smooth calves, to the silky insides of her thighs, and finally to her hips where he hooked his thumbs into the elastic he found there. His hands reversed the journey they'd just taken, this time with her panties in tow, discarding the last piece of clothing separating them.

They both sighed out, their eyes fixed on one another, both silently affirming that they'd passed the point of no return, and also acknowledging that they wanted to move forward.

Olivia was restless now. "Peter, come up here, please, I can't wait any longer." There was no need for foreplay now. Peter could see her shaking with want, and he didn't waste any more time. He spread his body out along hers, and she widened her legs even further to accommodate him as he settled in between her hips. Their eyes met once again as Peter skimmed his right hand down Olivia's body, not stopping until he reached the apex of her thighs. He used two fingers to spread her open, then moved one a little lower to push inside.

"Fuck, baby, you're so fucking wet…so tight", Peter moaned, moving his face to her neck so he could kiss her there. He fucked into her once, twice, three times, just to be sure she was ready. There was no question. He pulled his finger out of her and positioned himself at her entrance.

Just as he was about to push in, "Liv, shit, I don't have a condom. But I promise I got tested after…".

Olivia blinked out of the haze she'd just been in and looked Peter in the eye. "It's okay. I trust you."

No more words were needed as Peter slid all the way into Olivia, moving his lips to kiss her at the same time. The kiss caught her on her neck, though, as Olivia threw back her head in ecstasy, a deep guttural moan escaping her throat.

"Oh my god, Peter, holy shit!", Olivia choked out, her nails digging into Peter's back, her thighs raised and open. Peter began to move, pulling almost all of the way out, then pushing deeply into Olivia's core. He repeated this a few times, giving Olivia time to accommodate him. He struggled to keep a slow pace; the woman beneath him was so hot and wet. He wanted to slam into her but decided he'd let Olivia dictate the pace this time.

He didn't have to wait long. "Fuck me, oh my god, Peter please fuck me!", Olivia whined, trying with all of her might not to scream out. She arched her back as Peter heeded her commands, the strain evident on his face. Olivia was altogether thankful she'd been keeping her sessions with her trainer consistent, but she was sure there was no workout more pleasurable than this.

Peter continued pounding into her, both of them lost in a sea of pure rapture, but still cognizant enough of each other's body to recognize what the other needed. Before she voiced it, Peter knew Olivia was close to the edge, he could feel the shift in her. He moved his hand from its place on her breast down to her clit, desperate to feel her explode around him.

"I'm gonna cum, Peter! Fuck! Don't stop!", Olivia could barely contain herself, her voice rising to an alarming level. Peter dipped down kiss her, just in time to capture her scream as her body shook with release. Her arms dropped out to her sides, unable to hold onto Peter any longer, but she kept her legs wrapped tightly around his thighs. She knew he wasn't far behind her.

"Shit, Liv!", Peter whispered near her ear.

"Cum inside me. Please god cum inside me", Olivia had just enough strength for this one last request. And so he did, with one final push, Peter emptied everything he had inside of Olivia.

The room was silent as the pair laid side-by-side under Olivia's blankets. Olivia was wide awake but she could tell by the slow rise and fall of Peter's chest that he was drifting off to sleep. He was on his back, his left arm encircling Olivia's waist. She was on her side, her head nestled under his chin. Her mind kept going back to a question Peter had asked her earlier in the evening, and while at the time she had no intention of furthering her response, now, here, safe in his embrace, she wanted to tell him everything.

She blinked back tears, not for the story she was about to tell, but for the fact that she knew the man beside her was willing to hear it. That she could open her soul up to him and not feel anything but trust and understanding.

Olivia kissed his chin softly, urging him awake. "Peter? Are you awake?"

"Hmm. Kinda", he responded sleepily, but she saw his eyes blink open.

"I want to tell you something, but I want to make sure you hear all of it". Olivia lifted her head and switched positions just enough so that she could look at Peter, but still remain in his embrace.

Peter shifted a tiny bit too, placing a gentle kiss on Olivia's forehead. "I'm here, Liv. Fully. Completely."

"Okay", she took a deep breath, laying her head down once again on Peter. "When you asked me before if I've always wanted kids…"

Peter waited. He was going to let Olivia talk for as long as she needed. He rubbed his hand up and down her back, reminding her that he was there, reminding her that she was in a safe place.

Olivia continued then, "I sort of freaked out when you asked me that because I've been keeping this…this fucking guilt inside of me for so long and I've never told anyone about it and this is the second time recently that…".

She was having a hard time putting into words what she wanted to say, so she took a deep breath and started from the beginning. "Having kids was always a dream of mine, Peter. For as long as I can remember but it just was never happening for me. Work and life continually got in the way, and for so long I thought it was a closed case for me. I was getting older and it just wasn't going to happen. Then it did. It happened and I…I ended it." Peter could feel Olivia's warm tears landing on his naked chest. He wanted to soothe away her pain, make it all better, but for now he let her continue.

"You remember Brian Cassidy, right?". Peter nodded. How could he forget.

"He and I have a long history…", Olivia practically rolled her eyes at this, "…but about seven years ago we were in a serious relationship and I got pregnant. I was thrilled. I couldn't believe my biggest dream was coming true, I was finally going to be a mom. I remember standing in the kitchen early one morning making tea, before the sun even came up, and I could have sworn I was floating. That's how happy I was. But then I wasn't. I was terrified, and it wasn't just newly-pregnant jitters. I knew deep down in the depths of my soul that I couldn't have this baby. I had just been through the most horrific, most traumatic event of my life and I was sure I couldn't be the type of mother I wanted to be until I had some time to heal. The day I found out I called Brian and told him I *might* be pregnant, because I wanted to know first how he felt about it. We hadn't exactly talked about kids before. Do you know what he said? He said he couldn't picture himself ever being old enough to be a parent. I made up my mind right then that I wasn't going to have his baby…our baby. Right after I got off the phone with Brian I sat in front of my therapist and told him I had been pregnant but I lost it. I hadn't even had the fucking abortion yet, but I told him the baby was already gone! I lied to him, I lied to Brian, and I never told either of them the truth."

Olivia was practically sobbing, and Peter noticed her clinging to him even tighter now. He kissed her temple and continued slowly rubbing her back.

She shook her head, trying to compose her thoughts. She paused for a few moments and when her tears subsided she began again. "I'm not upset that I lied to them, I'm not. It was ultimately my decision, and I should have told Brian, but things crumbled with us pretty quickly after that. Then Noah came along and I finally had my wish and I was a mom. I was HIS mom, and I was in heaven. I'm still in heaven, but the guilt of that decision has never really gone away."

Olivia sounded so dejected and Peter's heart was completely broken for her.

Every ounce of Olivia's being wanted to apologize to Peter, wanted to explain away why she bothered telling him that, wanted to dismiss her experience, but the words didn't come. For the first time in her life, she said what she wanted to say, and simply let the other person listen and absorb it and process it on their own. She put her story and her feelings out there and didn't shrug it off as unimportant.

She felt lighter all ready.

Peter stopped rubbing her back and shifted them both so that they were laying on their sides. They watched each other, neither saying anything, both pairs of eyes brimming with tears. After a moment Peter moved forward and captured Olivia's lips with his. He kissed her with such passion, such understanding, such trust, that Olivia had to break away to catch her breath.

So this is what is feels like to let yourself be vulnerable, Olivia thought to herself.

Her thoughts were interrupted by Peter's low timbre. "Liv?" He cleared his throat.

"Yeah?"

"I'm glad you told me. You don't deserve to carry that guilt around by yourself", Peter's voice was stronger now. "You had to make a decision that was best for you at the time, and if you'd made a different one, you wouldn't have Noah. You were meant to be that boy's mom, Olivia. There's no question."

"I've always been a strong person, Peter. I think by now you get that", she let out a small laugh. "My entire life has been a test of will, it's always felt like it was me up against the world, and the only thing I could do was stand up for myself, and fight for myself, defend myself. There was no one that was going to do those things for me. When I started at SVU I realized I had a platform to fight for other people for a change and it felt good. So good. As I moved up the ranks I kinda got this reputation of being a badass, right? It's a powerful feeling. I've branded myself a Wonder Woman of sorts, ya know, I need to do anything and everything I can for other people. But it's come as sort of a detriment to myself. I've closed myself off to so many things personally because I thought I had to always be taking care of someone else. Does that make sense?"

Peter nodded. "But you're ready now to let someone see the not-so-strong moments? Because I know you have them Liv. No one can be strong all the time."

"Yes", Olivia's voice was barely a whisper.

"That doesn't make you any less of a Wonder Woman. Or any less of a badass. And if you want, I'll be that person for you." Peter swiped his hand across Olivia's forehead, moving away the hair that had fallen there.

"I want that, Peter. More than anything." Olivia couldn't hold back her tears any longer and she allowed them to slip down her face unrestrained.

Peter took his thumb and gently wiped it under both of her eyes before pressing his lips to her forehead. No more words were needed.

Olivia turned over to her other side and their bodies melded into one. She couldn't ever remember experiencing such a sense of serenity, and the last thing Olivia felt before she fell asleep was the crumble of the last remaining brick in wall the around her heart.

"Vulnerability is the key to happiness. Vulnerable people are powerful people. Opening your heart and sharing it means that you're going to get so much love in your life." - Amy Poehler