"Why do we have to go to Iowa? That's like a million miles away from Nana." a six year old Leonard whined from the back seat of the station wagon his father was driving through yet another corn field. Leonard wondered if anyone actually lived here or if it was just the scarecrows.

His father laughed a little, "I told you already buddy, Starfleet needs me to consult on the Medbay design for the new starships. It's a great honor that they think so highly of my skills. It's only for a couple years though, then we will head back to Georgia, I promise."

Leonard crossed his arms, putting on the best sulk he could, but even he had to admit it was pretty cool they called his dad of all people to help with this. "Well, of course they called you, you're awesome." Leonard sat quietly in the back seat for a few minutes until a thought occurred to him, he excitedly turned to his dad, "Do you think they'd take us up in one of those ships, you know like for a spin around the moon or something?"

"Leonard, they're still building the ships, they are not ready to fly anywhere yet, but maybe we can get a ride in one of the shuttles sometime." His father smiles at him in the rear view mirror.

Suddenly forgetting he was sulking Leonard began bouncing in his seat, "Yea! That sounds so cool!"

The rest of the car ride was quiet as Leonard watched the world go past. Soon they were pulling up the dirt drive to an old farmhouse. The moving truck had beat them there, but luckily their Starfleet liaison was waiting for them and the unloading was already underway. Leonard jumped from the backseat as soon as the car had come to a stop and ran into the house, ducking inbetween boxes and furniture wrapped in plastic and up the stairs to find his new room.

His dad had already told him about the house and the room he had chosen for Leonard. It was in the front of the building with the turret in the corner. His father had told him all about the round window seat that he could look out onto the front yard from on a cushioned bench seat. "It will be perfect for reading." his father had promised. What he had failed to mention was that the room was a soft shade of pink with a floral patterned wallpaper border just under the crown molding. Leonard could only stare in horror at the offending roses that circled the room.

When his father finally joined him upstairs he almost threw a fit about it, but his father had taken one look at it and knelt beside his son placing his hands on his small shoulders. "Sorry buddy, I was hoping they would paint it white or something before we moved in. Just remember it's only for a couple of years, and did you see the window seat?"

Leonard stepped into the room and headed for the window seat. It was a large cushioned bench seat just like his father had said, and the view out the bay of windows was beautiful. "And look, there is a hidden compartment under the seat. You can keep your treasures there." His father lifts the seat to show the open area below.

"Cool!" Leonard was getting excited again. Perhaps if he hung enough posters on the walls it wouldn't seem so pink.

The first day at his new school had Leonard feeling a bit nervous. Back home in Georgia he knew every kid in his class from the time they could all walk. He had grown up with them and gone to Preschool and Kindergarten together. Here though he felt alone, he didn't know anyone and had never really needed to learn how to make friends. The morning had been without incident so far, his father had brought him into the school and the Principal had walked him to the first grade class.

His new teacher, Mrs. Walker, seemed nice enough, and the other kids were all smiles when they greeted him. Now though, it was recess and there were many more children on the playground. Children from the other classrooms ignored him for the most part, but there was one kid who made a beeline for him as soon as the teachers had their backs turned. He was a ruddy faced boy, tall for his age, flanked by a couple other beady eyed boys. "Hey look it's the new kid. What's your name new kid?"

Trying to make a good impression Leonard held out his hand to shake, "I'm Leonard McCoy, what's your name?"

"Leonard!" the boy laughed, "That's an old man name. Are you an old man?" Leonard dropped his hand, knowing these boys were not going to be his friend. He turned to walk away from them and head towards the swings, but the tall boy grabbed his arm tightly, pulling him backwards and making him fall. "I wasn't done talking to you old man!"

"Leave him alone Paul!" Suddenly there was a blond boy standing between Leonard and the bully named Paul. He was smaller then them, Leonard thought he had seen him come out with the Kindergarten class.

"Get out of the way Kirk!" Paul yelled at the blond and tried to push him down, but the younger boy was quick and dodge him causing Paul to lose his balance and stumble forward. Although he would never admit to doing it, Leonard stuck out his foot just in time to trip Paul and he went down, face first into the dirt.

Leonard stood then and went to stand next to the blond boy in case they tried anything more, but by then the teachers had seen what was going on and rushed over. Paul put on a good crying act trying to claim Leonard had started it and but the teachers paid him no mind. They were used to his antics already. Leonard turned to the younger boy and saw he had some of the bluest eyes he had ever seen in his life, it was as if they were lit from the inside. "Thank you. I'm Leonard, what's your name?"

The other boy grabbed his hand and gave it a fast shake, "I'm Jimmy, nice to meet you. You wanna be friends?"

Leonard laughed as Jimmy kept shaking his hand, "Yeah sure as long as you stop shaking me before you turn my bones to jelly!"

After that day Leonard found himself looking for Jimmy on the playground every day during recess. He usual found him surrounded by the girls in his class, as well as a few from Leonards class. Jim was always nice to the girls picking them dandelions and smiling at them, Leonard would sometimes even start to feel weirdly jealous until Jim would smile at him. Leonard didn't get why he felt that way, he didn't have anything against the girls and plenty of them flocked around him as well whether he wanted them to or not. They said they liked his accent, he just thought they were silly headed girls.

Of course as much as Leonard liked Jimmy, he wasn't to fond of the nickname he'd been given on the second day of school. "Bones!" Jimmy called out as he ran across the playground towards him.

"What did you call me?" Leonard was sure he must have been talking to someone else.

"Bones, you know because you thought I'd turn your bones to jelly. I thinks it's much better than Leonard." Jim explained with a smile.

"I happen to like my name you know." Leonard huffed.

Jimmy just threw his arms around the older boy in a tight hug, "Come on Bones, let's go have fun." Leonard soon learned it took a lot to dampen Jimmy's mood, and decided he liked having a friend more than he cared about a silly nickname and just went with it. Jimmy was too much fun to be around.

They spent pretty much every recess together, and sometimes Leonard would stick around after class to play with Jimmy and his older brother some more because Jimmy never really wanted to go home. Leonard was a observant kid and he'd notice when Jimmy would have new bruises, but he always said they were from falling out of a tree or something. Leonard was young enough to believe Jimmy's stories. They never really saw each other outside of school though. Jimmy never invited Leonard over to play on the weekends. When Leonard invited him over for his birthday Jimmy was really excited to come, but then didn't show up. When Leonard saw him next on Monday he had a new black eye and a story about a crazy game of tag with his older brother.

Another thing Leonard noticed about Jimmy was he never seemed to bring enough for lunch. They had the same lunch time and Jimmy would usually sit on one of the tables outside. Once they were friends Leonard began to sit with him. Leonard noticed that Jimmy would rarely bring more than a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with him. Leonard never ask him why he didn't bring more to eat, he just started packing an extra apple in his own lunch and maybe a cookie too if he could sneak one past his dad. He also started saving change he'd find around the house to buy an extra milk. Eating a proper lunch was important to grew up strong, his dad had told him, and he wanted to be sure his friend had what he needed to do just that. At first Jimmy didn't want to take the extras that Leonard brought him, but eventually his grumbling stomach won out. He seemed to really enjoy the apples.

It was in his second year there that tragedy struck that would change Leonard forever. Leonard was now in second grade and Jimmy was in first. Although Leonard thought that Jimmy was smart enough to be in his class, if he would stay out of trouble long enough for the school to see it too. It was too bad that he wasn't though, as the school had managed to arrange a field trip for all the second graders to go to the Starfleet build site to get a tour of the new starships. Leonard's dad was even going to show them around one of the medbays he had helped design.

It was a bright and sunny Tuesday when a bus load of seven year olds pulled up to the gatehouse outside the build site. All of their little faces pressed against the bus windows trying to get a glimpse. Once the gate began to roll open all the kids cheered excitedly. The tour went really well, the kids were too much in awe to cause any trouble or wander off. They were just leaving the ship, Leonard's dad in tow, on their way to go sit down to eat their lunches when a loud screeching noise drew their attention to the sky.

Not to far in the distance they could see a shuttle craft falling from the sky, one of the engines was clearly on fire and a long streak of black smoke trailed behind it. The group of children watched in horror as the shuttle crashed into the ground just on the other side of the starship they had just been touring. The explosion that followed was loud and Leonard could feel the heat from the fire on his cheeks. Later he would say that he could hear the screams from the passengers onboard as they burned, but the only screams were his own as everyone aboard the shuttle had died instantly on impact.

It was years before the two saw each other again. After the accident Leonard couldn't stand to be near the starships so they went back to Georgia. It wasn't until he was in middle school that they asked his father to return for another consulting job. They set them up in the same rental house as before, and he was in the same room. Even years later the room looked the same with the floral wallpaper. The window seat seemed a lot smaller then it had when he was little, but the view was still nice.

When he got to school and once again knew no one, this time he wasn't as worried about it. He had already found that he was smarter than most of his classmates in Georgia and that a good portion of them resented him for that fact. He didn't see Iowa as being any different. He wasn't going to worry about making friends. He just wanted to get through this trip without too much incident. So when he was confronted with a pair of the most startling blue eyes in the world as he ate his lunch the feelings that they brought up were unexpected.

The memories flooded his mind, "Jimmy?"

The blue eyes widened a bit, then squinted in thought. "Bones?" Leonard handed over his apple as an answer and Jimmy's smile was almost as brilliant as his eyes. "Dude, it's great to see you. How long are you back for?"

"A couple of years probably. They have my dad consulting on the new batch of flying death machines." Leonard grumbled before going back to his sandwich.

Jimmy flopped down next to him on the bench, "You used to like those flying death machines."

"That was before I learned how many ways they can kill you. One tiny crack in the hull and our blood boils in thirteen seconds." He was about to go on but a laugh from Jimmy stopped him.

"Man, I have missed you! And not just because of the apples." Jimmy took a big bite out of the apple in his hand. "I hope you're wrong though, about the death machines, because I'm gonna be on one this summer."

Leonard stopped eating to look at Jimmy in shock, "What? Your going out there, into space?"

"Yup, this summer I'm gonna go visit my uncle and his family on some new colony planet, Tarsus four. It's gonna be awesome!" Jimmy was so happy, Leonard couldn't bring himself to dampen his enthusiasm with more statistics.

The year went by fairly quickly, the two boys becoming nearly inseparable. Leonard was happy to have a friend, it made the time in Iowa bearable. He even began to bring an extra apple and sandwich with him in his lunch for Jimmy who still never brought enough food to school with him. Jimmy was still quite popular with the girls, although he was old enough now to have some understanding as to why. Jimmy was a charmer, and those bright blue eyes of his could make the most stoic of girls blush when he turned the full force of their gaze on them. It still made Leonard a little jealous when Jimmy would be surrounded by girls and barely notice Leonard was still there. He just figured it was still because he wanted his friend to himself. Jimmy was his only real friend here.

Jimmy's mysterious bruises were still a problem as well, but he no longer bothered to come up with reasons for them. Jimmy would just shrug and change the subject, but Leonard did notice Jimmy didn't spend much time at home. When he mentioned it to his dad, his father looked concerned. He knew that Leonard cared for his friend deeply, and said he would look into it. Unfortunately there seemed to be a lot of people aware of the situation, but no one who wanted to do anything about it. (Leonard would not learn of this for many years, and when he did it would make him physically ill.)

The summer came to quickly for Leonard's liking, and soon he was saying goodbye to his friend, waving as Jimmy boarded the shuttle that would take him to the transport ship to Tarsus IV. It was only meant to be for about six months, but Leonard knew it was going to be the most boring six months of his life with no one left to hang out with, and not even school to occupy him for the first half of the time.

Leonard did send communications to Jimmy, but it took weeks to get a message there and weeks to get one back. The wait was agonizing. It was in the third month that Leonard got the message from Jimmy that they were having problems with the crops, and people were worried that there wouldn't be enough to eat. Jimmy tried to keep an upbeat tone to it but Leonard was worried all the same. He told his dad about the letter, but the elder McCoy assured his son that the local governing body there would have a plan, and thing might be a little rough but it would ultimately be fine.

The next week news broke about the total crop failure, and about the governing bodies plan to conserve food by carrying out mass killings of the settlers. Only those chosen few in charge were safe from the kill squads. Men, women and children were being massacred in the town square. Leonard started hyperventilating as the news played out in front of him. His father tried to comfort him, but was in almost as much shock at this turn in events as Leonard was. What he could say was that Jimmy was resourceful, if anyone could find a way to survive this it was Jimmy, but his words had little conviction. How could anyone escape this kind of evil.

It was another month before Starfleet was able to retake the planet. Those in charge that didn't flee were arrested, and the area was scoured for survivors. Leonard heard stories of small families that had hidden and survived the horrors that befell the other settlers, but they were few and none of the video feed sent back included a boy with bright blue eyes. Leonard didn't give up on that last sliver of hope he had that his friend would be found. Then one night the story broke of a group of small children found hiding in the woods and the boy who had helped them escape even when their families did not. The tale of how he would sneak out of the hiding place at night in search of food and water to keep them alive, all why dodging the patrol and searching soldiers. It was an incredible tale, but when this heroic young boys face was shown on screen Leonard cried with joy. Dirty and much to thin, Jimmy was barely recognizable, but those blue eyes couldn't have belonged to anyone else.

When he was brought back to Iowa he was in the hospital for months recovering. His father had been doing volunteer work there in his free time from working his consulting job, and was able to keep an eye on Jimmy's recovery, even if he wasn't his primary doctor and he made sure to give Leonard updates about his friend everyday that he could. Eventually when they deemed Jimmy was stable enough for visitors Leonard's dad brought him up to the hospital.

When Leonard entered the room Jimmy was all smiles, "Hey man! Did you miss me?" Leonard stifled the sob that nearly escaped and instead went for humor. He didn't want to get all emotional on his friend.

"Were you gone? I hadn't noticed." he smirked as this got quite a laugh outta Jimmy.

They sat and talked for awhile about the good things they had experienced in their months apart, trying not to think of the rest. Soon the nurse came in with Jimmy's lunch and told Leonard he could only stay a few more minutes, but he could come back the next day. The lunch tray was sparse, only a little broth, and crackers and jello. Jimmy didn't look to thrilled by the options. "They say the lack of food up there left my immune systems all screwed up and I've got a long list of allergies now. I could have eaten more, but they were all so hungry. They seemed like they needed it more than me. I've been hungry before." His voice got quieter as he kept speaking, the last bit barely a whisper.

It made Leonard's chest ache, but he knew not to dwell on it, that was not what Jimmy needed. "Well, you'll have to get me a copy of that list. I wouldn't wanna pack anything you couldn't eat in my lunch when you're back in school."

Jimmy gave him a small smile, "Sure man, you'll be better at remembering that stuff than I will anyhow. It will be like having one of the medieval food tasters, keeping the king away from the poisoned food."

"If you think for one minute I'm calling you Your Majesty or something you got another thing coming." Leonard responded. "I'll try to come back tomorrow if you want, maybe bring some cards so we can play rummy or something."

"Yeah that'd be great, it's so boring here. I hate hospitals." Jimmy smiled and waved him off, and Leonard managed to get all the way to the elevator before breaking down in tears.

It was a while before Jimmy came back to school. Once he did he was fawned over by many of the other kids who either saw him as a hero or a survivor of a terrible disaster. Leonard tried his best to treat his friend no different than he had before, and it was exactly what Jimmy needed. They became even closer than before and Leonard truly hated the idea of going back to Georgia and leaving Jimmy behind. He wished he could take him back with him, but that just wasn't an option. His only consolation was he could keep in touch with him this time, and his dad had said he would be called back to Iowa again in a few more years.

As more years past by and Leonard grew he came to realize his jealousy of the girls hanging on Jimmy had not been about their friendship at all. He laughed when he finally realized it, but it was something he kept to himself. Anything other than pure Godly heterosexuality was not well accepted in his part of Georgia, even in the more enlightened age they were living in.

Sure he still liked girls, so it was easy to keep his secret but he had to wonder about if things were different. If he lived somewhere else. If he could tell Jimmy about his feelings, how would Jimmy take it? It had been years since he had seen him last, well before puberty. What if Jimmy didn't like him back like that? What if he decided he didn't want to be friends with him anymore because of it? Leonard couldn't imagine a life without Jimmy there, so he didn't say anything to him in their communications.

It was right before his junior year in high school that his father announced another trip to Iowa. He told Leonard he didn't need to come this time, that he could stay in Georgia with his grandmother if he would prefer. Leonard was too busy deciding what books to pack to hear him though, and just rushed out of the room to start packing. Spending the last couple of years before college with Jimmy felt like the best thing that could have happened.

Once he was back in school in Iowa he found Jimmy. He hadn't mentioned that he was coming back, wanting it to be a surprise. Jimmy hadn't been all that hard to find, they had the same lunch hour and Leonard just followed the sound of giggling girls. Not that Leonard could blame them for their adoration of his friend, Jimmy had grown quite attractive over the years, and his eyes almost seemed as if they were even brighter than they had been before. Leonard had to take a breath to calm himself, he wasn't expecting the sudden onset of emotions he was experiencing just at the sight of Jimmy. As soon as he was sure his face was not betraying his feelings he moved forward. "Hey Kirk, think fast."

Jimmy's head shoot up in the direction of the voice as soon as he heard his name. His hand came up almost as quickly to catch the bright red apple Leonard had tossed at him. As soon as he saw what it was in his hand and he realized who it was that was standing in front of him he smiled the brightest smile Leonard could have imagined. It made his heart feel like it was about to break out of his chest it began beating so hard.

"Bones!" Jimmy jumped up from where he was perched atop a table and came jogging over to where Leonard stood, much to the chagrin of his adoring audience. "Man, when did you get back into town?" He slapped Leonard on the shoulder in greeting.

"Over the weekend, they called my dad back for another couple years. Thought I'd tag along, see if I couldn't keep you out of trouble for a bit. I know how you get when left to your own devices." Leonard smirked at Jimmy.

"Ain't that the truth, but you know better than to think you can stop me from doing anything once I put my mind to it." Jimmy said between bites of apple.

"That may be true, but maybe I can come up with better escape plans then you usually do. So we don't get caught."

"Now you're talking!" Jimmy gave him another friendly smack to the shoulder, "Come on over and meet the loveliest ladies in town." He said this last bit loud enough for the girls back at his table to hear, and dissolve into another fit of giggles. Leonard could only roll his eyes as he followed his friend back to the table.

As one year progressed to the next the two became near inseparable again. To an outside observer they would never understand how a grump like Leonard could put up with a jump first kind of guy like Jimmy Kirk, but most of his gruffness was all a show and Jimmy knew it. It was there thing, Jimmy would come up with some hair brained scheme and Leonard would tell him all the reasons it was a bad idea and Jimmy would do it anyway with Leonard right on his heels.

Pretty soon some of the girls fawning over Jimmy were batting their eyelashes at Leonard too. Not that he minded the attention, but he only had eyes for Jimmy. Something he worked really hard to keep to himself. Unfortunately some of the other boys were not to happy with not getting the attention themselves. One in particular decided to take it out on the two of them in the corridors of the school between classes as they were walking together to their lockers.

"Well looky here, if it isn't the old man and the charity case. Tell me Leonard are those girly lips of his good at sucking you off, or are you the one on your knees in this relationship?" Paul hadn't changed much in the years since their first meeting, he just got bigger. He even still hung around with the same lackeys he had back then.

Leonard couldn't help but blush at the implication, but Jimmy just gave a smirk as he leaned against his locker to look at the older boy. "What would you know about that Paul? Nobody is desperate enough to touch your dick. Maybe you're just jealous."

Paul puffed up a bit as his face started turning red at the insult, "That's because you and your boyfriend here are stringing all the girls along, all the while you're probably banging each other."

Leonard was about to say something, his finger pointing, but his mouth was hanging open at what Jimmy said next. "Even if that was the case, could you blame me. Look at this guy, best looking guy in school. If i was gonna sleep with a guy, he would be the cream of the crop. Face it Paul you're just pissed that all the girls can see you're nothing but a blow hard and would rather spend their time with a couple of good looking guys instead."

Jimmy slapped Paul on the shoulder as he went to walk past him and down the hallway. Leonard was just coming back to himself when Paul turned and grabbed Jimmy spinning him back around and landing a blow right to his face. ""Fucking faggot!"

"You asshole!" Leonard yelled as he jumped into the fray. It was two against three, but Jimmy was a scrappy fighter, and Leonard was a lot more graceful then his lanky height would make you think. Paul and his buddies never really stood a chance. Not that they didn't get a few hits in, and they all came out of it a little bruised and battered and with detention.

Detention went by in silence. Leonard had never really been in trouble before and was a little worried about what his father was going to say about it, but mostly his thoughts kept going back to what Jimmy had said about him. Did he really think Leonard was good looking? Leonard had never thought Jimmy was interested in guys, but he hadn't asked either. Shit, he was probably just shit talking to piss off Paul and didn't mean a word of it, but what if? The thoughts kept going around in circles in his head while they sat in that classroom for an hour, the only sound the ticking of the clock on the wall.

When they were finally released Leonard and Jimmy headed off together towards Leonard's house. He was quiet, his head hanging in thought, still trying to work through what Jimmy had said. Meanwhile Jimmy was talking a mile a minute, as if all the words he would have said in the last hours were forcing their way out of his mouth so he could catch up to where he should be by then. It was two thirds of the trip before he realized that Leonard wasn't talking back to him. "You're awfully quiet there Bones, you're not worried about getting in trouble with your dad are you? I'll tell him it was all my fault, he can yell at me for corrupting his perfect student son till he's blue in the face. It's cool. I'm pretty used to being yelled at for the stupid shit I do." Jimmy smiled and slapped a hand on Leonards shoulder who just sighed and slumped hi shoulders a little bit more.

"I'm not worried about getting in trouble with my dad Jim, I've been in detention a few times back in Georgia." Leonard started walking again, his house just coming into view at the top of the street.

"Then what is it Bones? You've obviously got something on your mind." Jimmy followed after him, but didn't push him to talk as Leonard just nodded his head in the direction of the house to indicate he didn't want to talk about it out on the street in front of their nosey neighbors.

Once they got inside and settled in Leonard's room Jimmy waited for him to start talking. Leonard sat in the old window seat and Jimmy was on the bed. He rubbed his hands over his face and looked up at the ceiling, "Did you mean what you said?"

"What I said? I say a lot of stuff Bones, you might want to narrow it down for me." Jimmy tried to make the conversation light since he could see Leonard was having a hard time with something and he wanted to ease his mind somehow.

"What you said about me, about if you were going to be with a guy you want to be with me?" Leonard looked up at his friend, he hoped the desperation he was feeling wasn't completely evident on his face. He could tell by the look on Jimmy's face it was, and he nearly ran from the room, but a part of him needed to hear the answer.

"Bones, are you gay? Is that why you never do anything with the girls that have been throwing themselves at you?" Jimmy was smiling, like he was relieved that it wasn't something worse. Like there could be something worse than being in love with your best friend and him not loving you back.

Leonard sighed again, and hung his head, "I'm not totally gay. Girls are fine, I've dated a few back home."

"But you prefer guys?" Jimmy asked, although it sounded less like a question and more a statement of fact.

"I don't know, I've never been with a guy. I'm attracted to them, but it's not really something that would go over really well in Georgia, even now a days." Leonard started pacing, it felt good to say it outloud, but Jimmy still hadn't answered the question and he was getting nervous.

Jimmy stood up too, "Man, you need to take a breath. Okay, so you're attracted to guys but are stuck in the closet. It sucks but it's not the end of the world. I mean you came out to me, and I am honored. And your dad is awesome, he's not going to have a problem with it right?"

"No, I think he'd just shrug it off like I was telling him the weather and go on as if nothing changed." Leonard let himself smile at that.

"Well alright. That's a start right. I know it's better here than back in Georgia, but not by much sadly. Still a bunch of small minded hicks, so I wouldn't go spreading it around here either. Sorry man, but really nothing to get so worked up about. So are we good then?" Jimmy was smiling fully now.

Leonard closed his eyes in silent frustration, "You haven't answered the question?"

"Question?" Leonard rolled his eyes and glared at Jimmy. "Oh right. I was kinda hoping you would forget about that. The thing is I'm kind of in the same boat as you, with the whole closet thing. You're a good looking guy, don't get me wrong, if you were some stranger in a bar I would totally fuck you against the men's room wall." Leonards eyes felt like they couldn't get much bigger. "But you're my best friend. I wouldn't risk ruining that."

Leonard could feel his heart breaking. "Yeah, of course. You're my best friend too Jimmy."

"If I was a stranger would you fuck me against the men's room wall?" Jimmy smiled at him.

"Of course not! Who knows what kind of viral infection you'd get from a place like that!" Leonard left of the thought that he'd gladly fuck him into the mattress right there in his room.

Jimmy laughed and slapped him on the shoulder, "There's my Bones! I knew you were in there somewhere."

The rest of the school year went without much drama. Leonard even found a girl he liked enough to take to the senior prom. Of course they doubled with Jimmy and his date, so it was easy enough to imagine just going with Jimmy alone. Leonard tried to keep those thoughts out of his head, knowing they would only lead to heartbreak. He tried to be happy with just being friends with Jimmy, which was still pretty good, but every once in awhile his mind would wander to a 'what if' scenario.

When the year ended and he walked across the stage to receive his diploma it was bittersweet, as he was happy to be going off to college but it also meant saying goodbye to Jimmy. Jimmy had already said that once he graduates next year he was leaving Iowa. Leonard knew his friend was smart and could have gotten into any college program he wanted if he hadn't gotten into so much trouble over the years. Jimmy said he would rather travel and see the world before he decided to settle down to anything or anyplace. Keeping in touch with each other would be hard, so Leonard figured he might not ever see him again.

It was in a quiet moment of desperation that he decided what he was going to do. It might ruin what friendship they had, but he had to take the chance since he could also lead to something wonderful. The two of them had plans that weekend, before Leonard headed back to Georgia, one last hurrah. They were going to drive out to Saulsbury Bridge Recreation Area for a weekend of camping, hiking and fishing and Leonard was determined to add a kiss to the list of activities. Just one was all he wanted, what could it hurt if they were never going to see each other again after this anyway.

They left from Leonard's house early in the morning and headed straight to the campsite. Leonard had packed some sandwiches for lunch that they could eat on the way as both boys were eager to begin their excursion. The bed of the borrowed truck was loaded with a tent and other camping gear, including fishing poles and some beers Leonard had snuck from his dad. (His dad had actually bought extra knowing that they would pilfer his supply, he had been a teenager once too.)

As they pulled into the park Jimmy drove slowly past all the campgrounds that were loaded with families and kids and didn't stop till they had made it to the most remote campsite the park had to offer. They were at least a couple miles deeper into the woods than any of the other campers. Once they found the site they both worked quickly to get the tent set up and their supplies properly stashed before heading off towards a nearby stream to catch their dinner.

They sat quietly watching their bobbers floating in the gentle current of the stream just enjoying the sunshine and the freedom of summer. No responsibilities, nowhere to be, just time to enjoy the world before life stuck it's ugly head back in. After they each caught a decent amount of fish they headed back to camp to collect some wood and get their dinner over a fire. They talked happily as they watched the fish cook above the flames. Happy to be away from school and on their own for a couple days, they talked about the future and what they were hoping it would turn out like for them each.

They drank some of the beers as they ate and by the time they were finished they were both a little drunk. Leonard decided it was now or never, the alcohol giving him the courage to speak his desires. He turned to Jimmy, expecting to find him gazing into the flames, instead he found him looking right back at Leonard. Leonard opened his mouth to speak but before he could get the words out Jimmy was kissing him. Shocked to stillness Leonard wasn't sure what to do, but when Jimmy seemed to start pulling away he realized he need to kiss him back. So he did, threading his fingers in the blonds hair he pulled their faces back together and pushed his tongue into Jimmy's mouth.

The two pulled apart a few minutes later, short of breath and flushed. They stared into each others eyes and Leonard finally spoke. "Where did that come from? I thought you only wanted to be friends."

Jimmy turned away from him to stare back at the fire, "I did, I mean I do, but you're leaving and we will probably never see each other again. It seemed stupid not to try, I wasn't lying when I said you were a good looking guy."

Leonard smiled. "If I knew all it would take to get a kiss from you was to head out to the middle of nowhere, I would have done it months ago." Jimmy turned back to his friend, happy that he was taking things this well, and Leonard took his face in his hands and kissed him again. "I've been dying to kiss you for two years."

"Anything else you've been thinking about doing, because we might want to move this to the tent." Jimmy was smiling now as well, kissing his way up to Leonards ear as he spoke.

"There is a myriad of things I'd like to do with you, but I didn't think it would go this well. I didn't bring anything with me." Leonard still had one hand in Jimmy's hair but the other was now stroking the younger man's thigh as he tried to remember to breath.

"Good thing I planned accordingly then. I've got condoms and lube in my pack. We can zip our sleeping bags together and try anything you want." Leonard's breath hitched at the thought and he pulled away just far enough to look Jimmy in the eye and see if he was being serious. He saw lust, desperation and just a little bit of fear there and kissed him one more time before taking his hand and leading him to the tent.

They spent that night fumbling through things neither had experienced before. It was awkward but neither was worried about it. It gave them the chance to find out the things they liked and didn't about themselves and each other. Once they found a good pace they were speechless in the ecstasy. Eventually they fell to the floor of the tent exhausted and covered in sweat.

The next morning they woke early and made their way back to the stream to clean the sweat and grime off before any hikers might come wandering by. Once they were clean and dressed again they locked their valuables in the truck and hiked up to the top of the highest point they could find in the park.

Sitting on a flat rock at the top of the path overlooking the rest of the park below Leonard decided maybe they should talk about things. "You know you could come to Georgia, you know next year after you graduate. You could crash with me for a bit, I'd like to have you around for a visit."

Jimmy sighed, "Bones, you know that is not a good idea. I mean, who knows where your head will be in a year. You'll be in college and busy with classes, studying to be a doctor like your dad. I wouldn't want to derail that, and I would. I am an amazing distraction."

"I might need a distraction by then." Leonard gave a half hearted smile, knowing Jimmy was right.

"I'm sure there will be plenty of distractions already there for you to pick from, you won't want me." Jimmy leaned back and stared up at the dark clouds gathering above them.

"I'll always want you," Leonard's honesty almost choked him, "in my life that is. You're my best friend, but if you don't want to be anymore, you know after last night, that's okay." He stared down at his hands clasped together in his lap.

Jimmy popped back up, "Bones, I'll always want to be your friend. Man if I could drag you with me wherever I go I would. If I did that though, I would be depriving the world of the great doctor that I know you'll become."

"What if I wanted to come with you anyway?" It was barely more than a whisper, but Leonard was completely serious.

"I wouldn't let you. I can't ruin your life just because I like you in my life. I'm better off with you around, but the world will be better off with you in school." He slapped a hand to Leonard's shoulder, "Come on Bones, it's getting ready to pour we should get back to camp." the two got up and made their way back down to their campsite, just beating the rain.

That night they went slowly, taking the knowledge and confidence they gain the night before and each took turns making the other come apart under their lips and fingers. They savored it, knowing it would be the last time they were together like this. Afterwards Leonard cried himself to sleep silently, his heart broken knowing they would part ways soon. They barely spoke in the next week, and then Leonard was gone.

Years had gone by and life had continued regardless of how Leonard felt about it. College, followed by medical school and his preceding internship gave him ample opportunity to find many a distraction in his off time, male and female. Nothing seemed to sooth his broken heart though. Eventually Leonard was able to move back to Georgia and take a position in the hospital in Atlanta. He felt that perhaps if he were surrounded by the familiar it would take his mind of the torch he was carrying for one Jim Kirk.

He even managed to get his emotions under control enough to find a nice girl and settle down just like mama wanted for him. It was a terrible mistake from the start, and he could do nothing but blame himself for the following implosion of his life. He ignored her. She cheated on him, and then they divorced. He should have expected the lengths she would go to to get back at him for wasting a year and a half of her life. Leonard barely got out of it with the clothes on his back and a bottle of cheap whiskey. Even his professional reputation was in tatters. So he decided to try to start over somewhere else familiar and headed off to Iowa.

He had been back in Riverside for only a week when Christopher Pike came across him in a tiny medical center exam room caring for children with strep throat and skinned knees. Pike convinced him that he was wasting his talents in this tiny family clinic and that Leonard should take a page out of his father's book and join up with Starfleet, working in the very medbays the elder McCoy helped design.

As he sat in the tiny bathroom on the death trap of a shuttle he began to really wonder if Pike had slipped something into his drink to get him to agree to this crazy idea. When the security officer started pounding on the door, yelling at him to take his seat he was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. He took another swig from the flask he had stashed in his breast pocket as he heard her inputting the override code to open the door. She was nearly a foot shorter than him but dragged him up and out of the bathroom with no effort at all. He tried to reason with her, but when she threatened physical violence to earn compliance he decided to shut his trap and take a seat.

He turn to the person on his right, "I may throw up on you." When he looked into the face of his potential victim he was greeted by the bluest eyes he had ever seen in his life. "What the hell are you doing here Jim?"

Jim Kirk gave him a lopsided grin as Leonard started counting the injuries on his face. " I was about to ask you that same question. Thought you hated these things."

"Yeah well, my ex-wife took the whole damn planet in the divorce, all I've got left are my bones." He pulled the flask out of his pocket to take another drink and then handed it to Jim. "What's your excuse?"

Jim took a swig and smiled, "I'm here on a dare."

"That sounds about right for you." Leonard couldn't help the little grin he had on his face as he took back the flask and stashed it in his pocket. "Starfleet has no idea what they have gotten themselves into with you."

"With us, you mean. Me to get us into trouble and you to get us out of it, they'll never know what hit'em. Man it is good to see you again Bones." Jim was practically giddy as the shuttle began to lift off the ground for their flight to San Francisco. Leonard gripped his straps tightly and closed his eyes, trying to imagine he was anywhere else at that moment then where he was. Then he felt a familiar hand on his knee and all other thoughts left his head. "Don't worry man, I got you."

Leonard slowly looked up into the face he dreamt about still, "Yeah, I suppose you do." Jim leaned over and kissed him gently as the engines really kicked in and Leonard's fears were forgotten.

The two men stared into each other's eyes for a moment until Jim leaned back into his seat. "So, a wife huh. How'd that work out for you?" he asked with a sly grin.

"You just had to ruin the moment, didn't ya." Leonard groused, before laughing despite himself.