Numbness. I can feel the joy of the crowd around me. They are free. I should be celebrating with them. I should be laughing and smiling and rejoicing that I was not forgotten. I above all should be happy. I who was trapped in the shell of my own mind, while I watched myself move and speak without consent. I most of all should be happy to be free of that control. But all I feel is a numbness.
She was a small girl, hard to see amongst the crowd. She wandered in their general direction, lost in her own thoughts. Although not oblivious to the crowds around her, she seemed unstirred by their seething emotion. She did not understand why she was here, or how. In fact, she did not even know where she was. Where had she ever been except inside the walls of Noradz? Only once had she ever seen the outside of those walls. When she was caged and chained in iron and taken into a place she would never forget.
True, she was free of the Shadowlands, but freedom was a concept she barely even understood. Before the Shadowlands, she had belonged to a people with the strictest laws of hygiene. She was raised with this painfully instilled in her. She had hardly known her parents. Her whole life had been taken up with training. Training to be nothing more that a servant girl. Like everyone else, she had blindly followed the laws of her city, not knowing, and through fear, not wanting to know what the world was like outside. Curious people had a way of disappearing. Change was not something that could come to her people easily. After all, idealists had a way of being silenced.
At the time, it didn't seem to matter. This was life as she had always known it. Her city was built on the ideals of cleanliness. Cleanliness and complete trust in those who preached it. But those ideals had fallen when they were betrayed by their own government. What was she to do with herself now? Everything she had ever known was a lie. So what was truth?
Thinking of the Ra-Kacharz brought anger to her mind now. Never again. She thought. Never again will I be ruled so blindly. I don't want to rely on people anymore. I have already seen that such heavy dependence leads to a downfall. I will not suffer that again. Naivete got my people and I into this mess. I won't go back to that state of mind again. …Well I'm not in Noradz anymore. I don't think I'll go back there. This place…the King brought me here. I think it must be Del. Perhaps I could stay here. I could not call it home. But I don't want to call Noradz my home either. I will not have a home then. But perhaps I could at least find work here. I don't need anyone to tell me where I should go, I'll look around this place on my own. I want…to be able to take care of myself…from now on.
The blue eyed girl was wandering unconsciously. The crowd had halted it's march, but she had continued her steady walk. She didn't realise it, but had been staring at the King and his companions, whilst heading towards the palace stairs. Dimly she could hear what the King had done to protect and rescue his people, and she half saw him receive a bejewelled belt from a palace maiden. Apparently they had a lot to say to each other, although the young girl could not hear what they were saying. She wasn't listening anyway.
"Had you heard this tale?" Lief demanded of Jasmine and Barda. Both of them felt rather awkward, but Barda chose to keep his silence. He was rather amused at the outcome of the rumor. Who would have thought that this foreign stranger in the palace had indeed been Lief's cousin? It never occurred to him that they might have been related. It was obvious that Jasmine had been somewhat more distressed about the rumor than he was though. He also had a fairly good idea why.
"Palace gossip. But you are far too young to marry. I always said so." Jasmine had chosen her answer well and expressed it more carelessly than she felt, Barda could tell. Feeling he should give them a moment, he looked around the crowd again, smiling to himself at their obvious joy, feeling proud to have been part of the rescue which brought them this happiness. Then he caught sight of one girl separated from the crowd, looking lost. He muttered an 'excuse me' to Lief and Jasmine as he walked towards her.
"Tira!" she turned and saw Barda. She smiled weakly at him. "Tira. It's great to have you back. I was afraid we would never see the real you back when I saw you in the arena." Then he smiled back at her. "But here you are."
"Yes." The serving girl Tira replied slowly. "I am…here. This is Del correct?" Barda nodded.
"You have never seen it have you?" she shook her head. "Would you like a tour? Not necessarily now, but when you're ready." Tira thought. It was a kind offer, but she had already resolved to show herself around.
"I thank you for the offer, but I will be fine on my own."
"Where will you go now?" He asked her. "You're welcome to make a home for yourself in the palace if you wish, although you will need to find work."
"Mmmm… although I doubt that will be difficult for you Tira." Tira looked past Barda, and saw Lief, who had made the last comment. He was hand in hand with Jasmine, and looked very pleased about it. Tira felt rather awkward. She did the only thing that seemed appropriate. She got down on one knee, and addressed Lief as the King of Deltora.
"Your Highness. Forgive me but, why did you not tell me of your titles? King Lief, Sir Barda and Lady Jasmine."
Now it was Lief's turn to feel awkward. Of course. She doesn't deal well with authority. He momentarily let go of Jasmine's hand, and took Tira's, lifting her out of her kneeling position to face him.
"Because I did not know I was king at the time either. And even had I known, I still would not have done things any differently. You are my friend, Tira, and I would not have wanted your servitude. Please just call me Lief." The concept of being friends with authority was new to her too, and looked with slight fear in her blue eyes from Barda to Jasmine. Jasmine smiled at her as Lief took her hand again.
"The same goes for me Tira. Besides, I was raised in a forest, nothing about me is ladylike."
"May I ask, how am I here?"
"Ah that…" Barda trailed off. "By magic." Lief put in, and he and Jasmine exchanged smiles. An inside joke no doubt. Tira felt awkward again.
"I want to thank you all for your kindness, and for saving me from the Shadowlands. I am in your debt."
"No you are not Tira. If anything, all we have done is repay a debt to you." Barda said with conviction.
"Yes, it was the least we could do after all you did to us." Jasmine added. "Our quest to save even Deltora might have ended there had you not helped us."
Tira nodded once.
"Well, we should probably go inside and straighten a few things out in palace. You're welcome to come with us if you choose, Tira."
"Once again I thank you, but I will remain out here. I have…a few things to straighten out also." Lief smiled and nodded, then he and Jasmine started to walk away. Barda turned to go, but looked back over his shoulder a moment longer.
"Tira?" he asked softly.
"Yes?" she replied.
"That was a very brave thing you did back in Noradz."
Tira's eyes met the ground again. She didn't look up until Barda's footsteps could no longer be heard.
"So…"