A/N: 10/18/2018

Yes, I'm uploading this shit, again. I'm only putting it back up because Sharon complains she has nothing to read… LOL! I thought she might like this one. I realize no one else likes this story, but if you do, you can leave a comment—if you want. I'm working on the next chapters of DTBT and Oblivion. I'm going to do better. I swear… LOL!

Stefan's Diary: Chapter 1: Emote

Bonnie rolled over in bed and gazed up at the ceiling. It was five o'clock in the morning. She couldn't sleep, her mind rolled with thoughts of Jeremy. She trusted him. She thought that things would be different since she'd died for him. She thought that he would feel more connected to her, more in love with her.

He asked her to trust him to be alone with Liv, and that's exactly what she did, trusted.

Bonnie could no longer choke back the soft sobs that had been imploring her to come out, when the vivid images of Jeremy laying between Liv's legs flashed into her brain, she bawled her eyes out, yet again.

"No! You're not going to cry over him," she scolded herself.

She forced herself out of bed and to shower. What she had imagined would be a tedious task, proved to be stress reducing as the hot water poured over her and washed her cares away. She was filled with the illusion that her cares were being washed away, but only for a blissful flare.

She stayed in the shower for over fifteen minutes. She bounded from the water, feeling a little more energetic. She felt spirited and certainly envious enough to wear her most revealing outfit and show Jeremy Gilbert exactly what he'd be missing.

She fumbled through her drawers for a pair of jeans and a shirt; she stopped when she ran across a top that she had worn on a date to the movies with Jeremy. They had managed to do a few things together as a couple since she'd returned from the prison world.

For the most part, she was happy. They were happy—so she thought.

She fished around in her drawer until she came across the pair of black, skin-tight jeans that Jeremy made her promise not to wear unless she was with him. She then searched her closet to find the perfect top to go with her painted-on jeans. She chose a black low-cut sleeveless blouse that she adorned with a black, studded leather jacket to shield her from the cool, breezy day. The clothing she picked out ended up being more of an expression of the darkness she felt inside, then the eye catching outfit she saw in her brain.

She primped in the mirror for over thirty minutes, making sure her make-up was flawless, and her hair was perfect, and it was.

It was now nine o'clock in the morning and Bonnie found herself on the highway in her blue Prius bound for the Salvatore boarding house to talk to Elena. Why she wanted to talk to Elena, she couldn't understand for the life of her. Lately, Elena seem to be so clueless and emotionally detached from anything that didn't concern Damon. Bonnie smiled when she thought about the possibility of Damon being home.

Since being thrown into a world where only she and Damon existed (along with a manic named Kai Parker) Bonnie had grown quite fond of him. They bickered and entertained each other. They were devastated and torn, but they came together; they protected and took care of one another. She loved him. She dared not say a word to Elena, but she felt closer to Damon than she did to her supposed best friend.

Bonnie's focus soon shifted back to her failed relationship with Jeremy. She rolled her eyes when she realized Damon would find out about Jeremy's indiscretion. She really didn't want him to know about Jeremy cheating on her. A part of her knew that Damon didn't approve of her relationship with Jeremy. She had caught Damon on many occasions side eyeing them when they entered a room hand in hand.

She finally pulled up to the front of the Salvatore Boarding House. She closed her eyes and sighed as she prepared to face her friend. She climbed out of the car and slowly walked to the front door, in her four-inch heels.

Her gold tone bangle bracelets clinked together as she pulled her purse over her shoulder. She straightened her jacket, that hit her right at the waist, before adjusting the large, square, gold tone trinket that hung from her necklace.

She strutted up the steps, leading to the front entrance and rang the doorbell. She stood there for a minute, but no one answered. She tried the bell, again, and someone yelled back that they were on the way. Her brow creased, she knew that voice. She turned to leave but his greeting halted her dead in her tracks.

"Bon Bon," Damon greeted all glowingly.

"Shit," she murmured, slowly rotating herself back around to face him.

"I heard that." He smirked.

She raced him an embellished grin.

"Good morning Damon," she greeted back. "Is Elena here?"

"Nope." His lips popped. "Come in." He signaled with a slight nod of his head for her to enter.

"No, it's okay. I'll come back later," she said disappointedly.

He looked at her suspiciously. Something was off. He could see it in her eyes. He looked her over, from head to toe. She looked amazing, but not like Bonnie.

"You can come inside. I don't bite," he said playfully, his voice comforting. He stepped aside and waved to the inside of his home with a slight swing of his hand.

She gave a nod to his invite, then stepped over the threshold. She turned to him, waiting for him to close the door. They walked to the living room side by side. They were in perfect stride.

"Have a seat. Would you like a drink?"

"It's nine o'clock in the morning." She gave him a sideways glance.

"I'm not talking about getting boozed up. Would you like some juice, a soda, coffee, or tea," he smarted, with a roll of his eyes. He was amused by her hypercritical way of thinking.

"Diet Coke is fine."

He vamp sped to the kitchen. He was back in seconds with a paper towel wrapped soda in hand. He sat down on the couch beside her, then handed her the drink.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." He sent her a cocky little smirk.

She popped open her soda and took a sip. Leaning forward, she removed a coaster from the holder on the coffee table and sat her drink down on top.

"Where's everybody?" she asked as she returned to a comfortable seated position.

"They got a lead on Stefan's doppelganger. Elena just had to tag along." He crossed his eyes in exasperation. "She couldn't stand the thought of Caroline being alone with Stefan," he added, his tone peppered with envy. "They should be back by this evening."

"Okay, I'll come back tonight."

"You can stay, Bonnie," he enunciated. "Why are you so hell bent on leaving? I thought we were beyond being annoyed with each other," he blurted.

As Bonnie was about to respond, her cell phone started to ring.

"Cute ring tone." He bobbed his head to the beat. She giggled, then dramatically whipped out her phone.

"Ugh," she grunted after glancing at the Caller ID. She rolled her eyes and hit the 'ignore' button. It was Jeremy. Seeing his name on the screen made her want to gag.

"Who was that? Jeremy," Damon teased.

Bonnie cut her eyes at him, an irritated look on her face.

"Wow, I was right. What's up with you two?" He cocked a brow in confusion.

"It's nothing. Look, I have to go." She stuffed her phone in to her purse, slinging it over her shoulder as she stood, and then made her way quickly towards the front door.

Damon jumped up, watching her as she walked away. His eyes darted down to her ass. He was impressed. He could tell her legs were beautifully shaped through her skin-tight jeans, and her rounded bottom was the icing on the cake.

He suddenly felt compelled to call her back. Not only because he wanted to gawk at her a little while longer, but he had a feeling that baby Gilbert had fucked up, and despite previous statements to the contrary, he couldn't stand to see her hurting.

Not that he would ever tell her, but he actually—kind of loved Bonnie Bennett.

"Bonnie," he called to her, then sped to the front entrance. As Bonnie was opening the door, he pushed it back closed.

"What's wrong? You can talk to me," he said seriously, a worried look in his eyes.

"No. I- no. I'll wait for Elena." She could barely get the words out; she started crying—in the presence of Damon Salvatore no less, and it was the last thing she ever wanted him to see her do.

At a loss for what to do, she altered her course, and marched back to the living room. She threw her purse down in the corner of the couch, ripped off her jacket, and continued to cry, using her hands to hide her face as she blubbered pitiful sobs of devastation.

Damon walked back in to the living room, grabbing a box of tissue off a table as he passed. He sat down next to Bonnie before pulling pieces from the box. He lightly touched her hand with the tissue; she snatched it away and loudly blew her nose. He bit down on a chuckle.

She brought her miserable eyes up to meet his fiery blue gaze. The amusement he felt dissipated at seeing his little witch's despondent mushroom eyes that were still ever so beautiful. Bonnie snuck two tissues from the box. She blew her nose, once again, and it was shrill. She lowered, then left her fluttering lashes back up at him, mortified. They burst at the seams the moment their eyes locked. Their laughter immediately lightened the mood.

Bonnie tried handing the soiled tissue to Damon, not realizing what she was doing.

"Really, Bonnie?" He looked at the snot paper with a raised brow.

She looked at the soiled tissue, next. It finally dawned on her what she had done. She let out a hearty chortle, and Damon followed.

Bonnie grabbed her tummy, still falling all over with amusement.

Damon sobered. Seeing this side of Bonnie warmed his heart. He was soon taking back in time, back to the time Jeremy told him Bonnie was dead. Even though she was sitting here before him now, alive and well, it still hurt him to know that she had died, and that there had been a chance that he would never see her again.

"I'm glad you're alive," the words mindlessly slipped from his lips. He never meant to say those words. He didn't want Bonnie to know that he had saved her—for himself—for her. He wanted everyone around him to believe that it was all for Elena, but that wasn't the case… it wasn't the case at all.

She calmed as she slowly sat up on the couch. She stared into Damon's misty orbs.

He stared right back into her glistening greens.

"I wouldn't be here if it weren't for you," she said above a whisper. "Thank you."

"Don't." He shook his head. "You don't have to thank me. I wanted to save you."

She smiled, then timidly reached her hand out to his. His accepting fingertips lightly brushed against hers before they intertwined and locked their hands together.

They gazed intensely at each other, silently they sat. As she looked at him, she couldn't help but think of how beautiful he was. She had always admired him, his passion, how he loved so vigorously. She respected his drive and his ability to never give up on the things and the people that he loved. He was intelligent, charming, sexy, and witty.

As she fondly thought of him, she laughed outwardly. Damon gifted her with a smoldering glint. He too, was thinking fondly of her.

He had always revered her selflessness, her loyalty, and how compassionate she was. She was a fighter and so brave; she'd do whatever it took to save her friends. She knew what she wanted out of life, and she demanded respect.

Her beauty was like no other woman that he had ever met. He didn't even think Elena's beauty could hold a candle to hers. Her full lips, tawny smooth skin, and perfectly toned body was a sight to behold, and more importantly, he always felt composed, and truly confident when around her; he loved being that guy.

A few minutes went by of them being enthralled with each other and stealing flirtatious gawks when Damon decided to finally continue the conversation on why his little witch was so sad.

"…so, what did baby Gilbert do?" he asked, his jaw square, and a stern look in his eyes.

"He, he… He cheated on me with Liv."

A surge of red burst in his eyes, before and explosion of words flew from his mouth.

"GOD DAMN IT! I KNEW IT!"

He jumped to his feet and thrust his tightly fisted hands, forcefully out in front of him. His face turned beet red and his jaw began to tick. He kicked the bar, then hurriedly turned around to face Bonnie, an infuriated look in his eyes.

She nervously fidgeted in her seat as she intently observed an angry Damon. She knew that he wouldn't be too happy about Jeremy cheating on her, but she wasn't expecting for him to be enraged.

"I'm going to kill that fucker," he avowed through gritted teeth.

"No. You can't. He's Elena's brother," she reminded in a firm tone.

He didn't respond to her remark. He didn't even flinch or let on that he cared that Jeremy was very important and beloved by the woman he had professed his undying love for many times over.

As Bonnie dazed abstractedly at Damon, visions of Jeremy having sex with Liv popped back into her mind. "Jeremy's so stupid." Her face twisted with disgust. "They didn't even lock the door to the house. I thought he might be hungry. I decided to take him diner. I bought his favorite sandwich from the dinner," her voice wavered; her speech was marred by the unpleasant images that rolled around in her brain. Here she was, breaking down, showing her vulnerability to Damon Salvatore, yet again.

Her teary green eyes and sad face broke Damon's heart all over, again, when all he wanted to do was hang on to the rage he felt for the man that broke her heart. He absolutely wanted to murder Jeremy.

"I walked in to the house, and I heard… sex noises… moaning, but I didn't think it would be Jeremy. Not him."

Damon found himself gravitating towards her. Not only in body, but in spirit, too. He walked over to the sofa, anger and commiseration weighing him down. He sat down next to her, invading her personal space. He placed his fingers under her chin and turned her sights on him.

Damon, don't do this. She's vulnerable, he thought, but he wanted to kiss her, take her pain away. He had to kiss her. He began to drift into her. He closed his eyes, and she closed hers.

What are you doing Bonnie? You can't kiss him. He's your best friend's boyfriend. She mentally battled with the licentious temptations burning inside her.

Damon's soft mauve lips finally made contact. They pushed slowly, softly against hers. No. No. No Bonnie. You must stop this, the logical part of her mind protested, but her body couldn't seem to do what her brain demanded. Her lips had a mind of their own as they pushed back into his.

Damon you can't do this. This is Bonnie. This is Elena's friend. Stop! Please stop. Please. He pleaded with his libido and scolded himself, for his lips seemed to do as they pleased as they pushed her mouth wider apart. He meandered his tongue into her mouth, swiftly and smoothly it moved around hers. Her warm orifice was heaven to his cool mouth.

Their kiss became heated, quickly. They shifted to lie down on the sofa, Damon still kissing Bonnie. He grabbed her purse and tossed it to the floor. Their tongues battled, the parry and riposte of the skilled.

Bonnie had never experienced such passion. Her body was on fire; chills ran up and down her spine. Her core throbbed and moistened with anticipation as Damon repeatedly rolled his hips against hers, positioning his knee to slightly spread her legs all the while kissing her with such libidinous fervor.

Damon too, was also feeling something that he had never felt before. He wondered as his tongue twirled in harmony with Bonnie's, why he couldn't feel this same type of connection with Elena.

With Elena, he felt like an animal in heat, but with Bonnie, he wanted to take his time. He wanted to make love to her, kiss her body all over, and then rock her in his arms all night. His body seemed to be thirsty for this type of bond, this new sort of partnership. His body quivered with such a wanton and desperate desire for her that it hurt.

She kicked off her shoes and wrapped her legs over his as her hands busily massaged his back and tugged at his shirt. She rotated her hips excitedly against the huge bulge in his pants, seeking the friction her center hotly desired, as her hands slowly worked their way up to his raven hair. She ran her thin fingers through his hair feverishly. He continued to kiss her, deeply and with carnal abandon.

He pulled away from her mouth and began trailing his lips over her cheeks, down her neck, and chest.

He sensuously licked and sucked on her, exploring this new landscape of skin for several minutes before breaking away.

He lifted himself off her and was now kneeling over a closed eyed Bonnie. She opened her eyes to see Damon staring down at her. Her chest rapidly rose and fell as she took him into her.

She wondered what he was thinking as he gazed down on her with a ravenous look in his eyes. He was dangerously handsome in this moment.

Get up Bonnie, she demanded herself to do the right thing, but her body still wouldn't budge.

Damon, you must stop. God she is so beautiful, his mind whispered. He swallowed deeply, gulping back words he didn't want to say aloud. His hands suddenly had a mission all their own as he began to massage her all over, her breasts, her abdomen, her thighs.

I'm touching her breasts, oh God. Elena, please call. You need to stop me, he pleaded internally before his eyes glanced over to his cell phone sitting on the table.

He turned his gaze quickly back to Bonnie, as he ran his hands down over her abdomen, massaging a path to the waistband of her jeans, and undoing the buttons. His eyes quickly darted back up, locking gazes with a nervous looking Bonnie. She rubbed the back of his hands and the move gave Damon the approval to proceed.

She closed her eyes and focused in on him undoing her clothes. She felt him unzip her jeans. He then began to work them down over her hips. She bit her bottom lip as he fastidiously worked her pants down over her thighs.

He pulled off her jeans, then worked her panties down her legs. He licked his lips with anticipation as he placed his hand on Bonnie's knee, pushing her legs apart. He took a deep breath and swallowed hard as he looked down at her perfectly manicured pussy.

Just one taste, he whispered lowly to himself.

She was expecting him to penetrate her with his penis, but it was his fingers instead, spreading her weeping folds apart.

He spread her wet groove apart with his fingers, then lowered himself to tenderly suck, and lick on her precious nub. She whimpered as he moved his tongue quickly over her clit. His licking and sucking drove her into a frenzy.

She lifted her shirt and began to rotate her hips underneath his face.

"Yes," he whispered between her legs.

"Uh," she moaned, lowly.

He then licked her folds insatiably before fucking her warm, wet, canal with his tongue.

Is this really happening? She thought to herself, her eyes still closed.

His moves became more aggressive as her juices flowed from her secret sweetness. He continued to lick, suck, and rapidly plunge his tongue in and out of her hot, tight sheath.

"Oh God, oh shit, yes," she panted as she pushed her face in to the back of the plush sofa. She finally lifted her head to watch him as he worked her over. She clamped her legs snugly against his face as she rubbed her fingers briskly through the hair on the crown of his head.

She bit her lips and moaned repeatedly as a wonderful feeling began to build up inside her. As her excitement rose, so too did Damon's. He continued to lick her clit and lovingly delve his middle digit into her extremely wet opening. "You are so wet," he murmured.

She pushed her head back in to the sofa and cried out as her center rapidly throbbed and clenched around his probing finger. She began to giggle as her orgasm hit her in waves.

He lifted his head, his lips glossy with her nectar, and smiled at her as she giggled and squirmed about the couch.

She finally looked up to see him smiling down on her. She feverishly rubbed her trimmed hairy bush before twirling her finger around her precious nub. Damon sucked his finger clean of her velvety liquid.

He was feeling mighty confident after making Bonnie Bennett cum, but he wasn't finished with her, not by a long shot. He got to his feet and quickly removed his shirt. He wanted to be inside of her. He wanted to feel her warm center clench, cum, and throb around his engorged cock, too.

She watched him with an intent look in her eyes as he undid the button and then the zipper of his jeans. Bonnie you can't. This is Elena's home, her boyfriend, she thought worriedly.

He gripped the waist of his jeans and pushed them down over her hips.

Bonnie's eyes widened at seeing Damon's raven pubic hair peeking out of his jeans. This was her queue. Someone had to be the bigger person. Neither one of them were thinking with their brains. She elected to be the stronger individual in this moment. She quickly sat up, grabbed her panties, and jeans from off the floor and hurriedly put on her clothes. The savvy and abrupt move put a halt to their secret rendezvous.

"Hey, what are you doing?" he asked in a low, husky voice as he observed her with wide eyes.

"Damon, we can't," she blurted as she slid into her heels.

"…but, but, this feels right," he pleaded with her, skepticism maiming his aching voice as he sent her a humiliated look.

"This feels right?" Bonnie questioned hysterically. "You're my best friend's boyfriend. I go with her brother," she reminded in a raised voice.

"He cheated on you! Twice! You need to dump his ass!" he argued.

"…and what do you think Elena will do to us when she finds out you cheated on her with me?" she screamed.

"I killed her best friend. She didn't dump me then, and she certainly won't dump me now," he said, sure of himself.

"We can't do this; as much as I want to be with you, we can't." She grabbed her purse and jacket and tried to march out of the house.

"Bonnie," he called breathlessly. He grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back into him. He snaked an arm around her waist and stared desirously into her eyes. "I care very deeply for you. I want you."

"Are you willing to leave Elena for me?" She asked seriously, looking Damon square in the eye.

He was rendered speechless.

Here he was, in love with two women. One woman was all wrong for him, and the other was perfect for him in every way, but he was selfish. He wanted them both, but there was no way Bonnie would go for such a trashing thing, and he wasn't quite strong enough to give up his toxic relationship with Elena.

Seeing the look on his face told her everything she needed to know. "That's what I thought." She glowered. "Let's pretend this never happened."

"I'm not going to pretend that this never happened," he answered, frustrated.

They heatedly eyed each other down.

"Look, I don't want this to ruin our friendship. Can we still be friends?" she asked, harking back to what Elena had told her about Damon not wanting to be her friend if they were broken up.

He nodded, his eyes moistened.

"I will always be your friend, and I will always be here for you," he replied assuredly.

She couldn't believe his answer. She pressed her hand to her chest, calming the elation she felt over his words, his declaration.

He pulled Bonnie into him, placing a chaste kiss on her lips.

She threw a hand up on his shoulder, shying away from his embrace, but he wasn't going to let her take this away from him. He took her by the chin and planted another sweet kiss on her lips. He pecked her lips… over, and over again. She became weak in his grasp. He had a power over her, and she hated the way it made her feel.

If it weren't for Elena, she'd move heaven and earth to be with him, to try and make a life with him, but it was obvious that they weren't going to happen, not in this lifetime.

"May I freshen up before I go?" she asked, breaking the moment.

She turned to walk away, her back to him. Her hand trailed down his shoulder, then his arm to the tip of his fingers. He gripped her fingers, stopping her in her tracks. She squeezed her eyes shut. She couldn't look back and see him. She'd knew she'd melt like butter at the sight of him.

"Damon," she whispered, her back still to him.

He loosened his grip. Her fingers slid over the palm of his hand, over his fingers, and just like that, she was free, but that wasn't what she wanted at all.

She rushed to the guest bathroom. She gripped the sink and took a deep breath, trying to regain her composure. She grabbed a towel from the linen closet. She wanted to cry, but she berated herself instead.

"No, don't you dare cry," she reprimanded. She then laugh-cried at the fact that she was taking a whore's bath in Damon Salvatore's washroom.

After freshening up, she sighed at her reflection. She ran her fingers lightly over her lips, remembering Damon's kiss. She tried to be satisfied with not having him. If he was happy, then so was she. She tried to convince herself of that.

She made her way back downstairs. She stood at the end of the stairwell, looking at Damon, her expression dismal. He was sitting on the couch, drinking a glass of bourbon, at eleven o'clock in the morning.

She felt like it was all her fault. She wanted to say goodbye, but she didn't want to further aggravate the situation.

He could smell her aroma drifting in the air. Black veins swam across his cheeks, and his eyes were bloodshot red. He wanted to see her out, but right now, it hurt too much to even look at the woman that he could never have.

Bonnie hurriedly put distance between them before exiting the boarding house. She stood at the entrance of their house for the longest before willing herself to leave the one person that made her feel like she was the only girl in the world.

Bonnie was now gone, and it wasn't until she left that Damon found the tenacity to turn around and look at the door that he had let Bonnie Bennett walk out of.

"Bye Bonnie," he whispered dejectedly.

:::::

Bonnie drove slowly down the road. She didn't know where to go, or who to talk to about what had transpired between her and Damon. She felt nervous, and confused, and guilty about the entire incident.

She thought about going home and meditating over what had happened between her and Damon, but she really didn't want to be alone, especially not now when her life was becoming even more complicated.

She shared a very intimate moment when her best friend's boyfriend. They said things to one another that could not simply be forgotten. There was no coming back from what they had done.

She found herself in front of Matt's house. She climbed out of the car and leisurely strolled to the front entrance.

She knocked on the door and waited patiently for Matt to answer.

"Bonnie!" he welcomed excitedly and then pulled her in for a tight squeeze.

"Hey Matt," Bonnie greeted dryly as she timidly held onto him.

"What the hell are you doing here?" he asked playfully.

"What, I can't visit a friend?"

"Well, of course you can. Don't be silly."

"You better be," she forced herself to smile.

"I was about to make me a late breakfast. Are you hungry?"

"I can go for a bite." She was famished, frolicking around on the sofa with Damon really worked up her appetite.

Matt went to the kitchen and whipped them up a batch of pancakes and fried some turkey bacon.

As he tended to the food, he noticed Bonnie sitting at the kitchen table with a faraway look in her eyes. He then remembered that Jeremy had been calling him all morning looking for her. He suspected that her thoughts were on Jeremy.

"How are things with you and Jeremy?"

"Uh, they're great," she lied.

"Are you sure? He's been calling me all morning looking for you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, he seemed pretty upset."

"Well, I guess I might as well tell you. I caught him cheating on me with Liv."

"What the hell? I can't believe Jeremy would do that," Matt said, disappointedly.

"Don't worry Matt. I'm fine. Really."

"No, you died for him, and he cheats on you! How is that fair? I'm so sorry Bonnie," he expressed, vexed

"I really don't want to talk about this right now."

"Bonnie, don't let this eat away at you," he advised.

"I said I don't want to talk about this Matt," she quipped.

A wounded expression tinted his face. He searched her with a great scrutiny, then went back to what he was doing.

Jeremy wasn't currently on her mind. Her mind was occupied with thoughts about her encounter with Damon. He admitted to having feelings for her and she, in a roundabout way, admitted her feelings for him, too. She realized she should be thinking about and considering her friendship with Elena, but she had to face the inevitable truth, she was falling in love with Damon.

For the first time in her life, Bonnie was feeling a little resentful of Elena. Her friend was all that stood in the way of a relationship with Damon.

"Hey Bon, the food's ready," he announced giving her a concerned mien.

"What?" She jerked her gaze over to him. He had taken her abruptly away from her thoughts.

"The food is ready."

"Oh." She forced a smile.

He placed the food down in front of her. She picked over her pancakes and doodled in the syrup. Matt looked at what she was doing and then chuckled.

"You don't like my cooking?"

"I do like your cooking," she said robotically, a curl in her lips.

"Here, let me help you." He took her plate and neatly cut up her pancakes. She smiled as she watched him be so attentive to her needs. She had never had a guy to do something so sweet for her.

"Thank you."

"Anytime." He blushed.

They smiled at each other, not saying a word. As Bonnie regarded him, she thought about what a wonderful friend Matt had been to her. She then thought about how Elena had broken his heart, how his sister was murdered, and how his mom had run out on him, repeatedly.

She felt pity for him. He deserved so much better. He was humble and kind. He was a great catch. Any woman would be lucky to have him... so why didn't she want him?

Why couldn't she make herself fall for Matt? Anyone would be better for her than Damon, who was already madly in love with her best friend.

Matt too, felt heartbroken for Bonnie. He couldn't imagine why any man would want to cheat on her. She was beautiful, smart, and funny; she had done so much for him and all their friends.

He couldn't imagine why everyone was so gung-ho about protecting Elena and not Bonnie. She was always the one who ended up hurt, and she was always the one who continually gave up everything to make sure everyone else was happy.

She deserved a good boyfriend, a happy ending. Bonnie is a great catch. She'd be the perfect girlfriend for me, he thought. He began to wonder why he had never thought about dating her before. They were already great friends. Friendship was the perfect foundation for a good relationship, he thought.

He wanted so badly to make a play for Bonnie right here and now, but she was with Jeremy, whom he considered his best friend.

They finished their food, and Bonnie helped Matt clean the kitchen before they sat down in the living room, letting the TV watch them whilst they played a game of cards.

Matt couldn't ignore how distracted Bonnie was. He reached his hand over to hers and gripped it tightly.

"I can see this thing with Jeremy is bothering you. You can talk to me."

She looked at him for a few seconds, wondering if she should confide in Matt about what happened between her and Damon. She'd rather talk to him about Damon, than Jeremy, but she'd knew that Matt would probably blast her for liking Damon and being intimate with him knowing that Damon was with Elena, her best friend.

She rolled her eyes internally as she imagined how that conversation would go down.

As she looked at Matt, she began to picture how Damon looked when he knelt over her.

Her heart went ablaze when she pictured Damon's crooked smile. His declaration began to echo in her cognizance. He wanted to save her for him. He cared deeply for her. That great muscle in her chest began to pitter patter simply thinking about hers and Damon's conversation. She outwardly smiled as the plethora of thoughts of her time with Damon rolled around her head.

"You're smiling. Were you remembering old times with Jeremy?"

"Huh, what?" She startled.

"Were you remembering old times with Jer?" he reiterated.

"Uh, yeah, sure." She gave a grin, hiding the true nature of her feelings.

They stared blankly at each other, not knowing how to continue their awkward conversation.

"Why do you suppose people cheat?" She asked.

She hoped that Matt could give her some answers as to why Damon would cheat on Elena with her. She trusted that his response would give her hope that there was even the smallest chance that Damon could love her more than Elena, because why else would he try to make love to her.

"I don't really know, but to me, a cheater is someone who's selfish. A cheater is only concerned with their own happiness," he replied.

"When Jeremy cheated on me with Anna, it was because he couldn't stop loving her, but I can't figure out why he would cheat on me with Liv."

"…because he's stupid, Bonnie; he doesn't know what he wants. He's a jerk, and you deserve better."

She gave him a diagonal slant of her lips and squeezed his hand. Matt returned the squeeze, then darted a desirous gaze her way.

She became nervous under his desperate gape. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her tightly into him. He wanted to touch her, and a hug seemed appropriate enough in this instance.

He slowly pulled away from her, a ravenous look till in his eyes.

"What do you think about me?"

Bonnie's eyes widened at the question posed.

"I think you're a great guy, Matt." She looked anxiously into his inconsolable peepers, then hurriedly looked away.

He beamed in response to her answer. Her response gave him the courage to steal a kiss from her lips.

He wrapped his hand around the back of her neck, pulling her into him to deepen the kiss. His lips greedily pushed against hers.

Her eyes bulged at the initial shock of Matt having the gall to kiss her. She then shut her lids and melted into his virtuous osculation. She had never known a kiss as innocent as this one. Their lip lock was loving and pure—like the man kissing her. The tip of his tongue touched her bottom lip. She hesitated to part her mouth and let him enter. He wasn't persistent. His mouth stiffened, and the kiss became awkward. She felt sorry for him, so she put her all into their smooch, and he let loose like a horse right out of the gate.

He took her face into his hands, steadying her as their kiss developed. They smooched for several minutes, only breaking for air.

You don't love him Bonnie, don't do this. I need to move on. I've got to forget about Damon, she argued internally with herself.

Oh, God, I'm kissing Bonnie. Jeremy doesn't deserve her. We'll break it to him gently, Matt thought confidently.

They sunk deeper in to the couch as they continued to kiss and caress each other. They cuddled, kissed, and necked for half an hour.

"Damn. I hate my life," Matt pouted as he pulled away from their make out session.

Bonnie lowly giggled. "Why?"

"I have to go to work, but I could do this with you all day."

"Yeah, this is nice," she halfheartedly agreed.

"I get off at nine. Will you come by and watch a movie with me?" he sat up on the couch and patiently awaited her answer.

"I would love to," she beamed.

They kissed a little more before Matt walked Bonnie to her car. He kissed and hugged her goodbye and then watched her drive away. "I can't wait to see you tonight." He grinned.

"Bye, Matt!" she yelled and waved as she drove off. She held onto the smile that Matt instigated for a jiffy, but her mind soon wandered back to the time that she shared with Damon earlier that day.

She propped her head up on the door of the car, steering her vehicle confidently with one hand as anger, heartbreak, lust, and jealousy begin to rip her consciousness apart.

"What the fuck is happening to my life?"