one: all good things

Katara's hands, chafed and dry from the return to South Pole weather, were balled up into tight fists at her sides, her whole body strung with tension. Her mittens were probably filled with nervous sweat. She was barely conscious of the fact that she was biting her lip.

This was it.

After all this, it was really going to end like this.

Nobody would have predicted it, least of all her. She'd hedged her bets and still came out in a loss.

Aang's voice, deeper and smoother than it was just a few short years ago, was loud and clear. "And the winner of the Second Annual Southern Water Tribe Official Penguin Sledding Circuit is… Yuko!"

The crowd erupted in enthusiastic, if slightly confused, cheers.

Aang was indeed officiating the event - in fact, it was Aang who had founded the SWTOPSC in the first place. It was partially a piece of the overall effort to restore culture that had been lost to the war, but also partially just because Aang was baffled that it wasn't already a thing. It wasn't that penguin sledding hadn't been done competitively before in her tribe, it was just that… no one who was alive had any experience with it. It was a small reminder of what the war had done to her people, that even the smallest of joys had been taken from them.

It was seemingly insignificant, but the community had really bonded over it in the last two years. Hakoda, having returned to his post as the Chief of the Southern Water Tribe, fully endorsed it, allocating public funds for the prize - the winner received two hundred gold coins. There wasn't much cost involved in setting the track; Katara had been used it as an opportunity to get out and do some real training and practice with her students - they'd collectively donated their time to waterbend the circuit over the last month.

Yuko, this year's apparent winner, was the very definition of an underdog. One of the youngest contestants - the competition was restricted to children, under age 17, but he was a mere twelve years old, older only than his younger brother Kobo, who was eleven, and whom Katara was pretty sure had only entered the race after throwing a fit to his parents that Yuko was doing it. He had shown serious disinterest in the circuit when it was announced, and hadn't attended last year's race; no one was even sure why he ended up competing at all.

He was a pretty good hustler, Katara thought with a raised brow, perhaps practicing in secret or at night. She wasn't sure why he would do that - as intense as all of the adults were on the outcome of the race, there were strict sanctions on official betting. In any case, she knew most of the village was hoping that the prize would go to someone whose father had not survived the war, someone who truly needed it.

It didn't matter now. Katara shuffled her way through the crowd - a giant sea of blue, Katara noted, with a brief whispering in her head that she hadn't really missed the monotony here - up to the podium. She watched on as Aang placed the pendant over Yuko's neck with a gleeful smile that rivaled the kid's own. He posed with him for a moment as the tribe continued cheering, hand on shoulder, giving a thumbs-up for the crowd. His parents were quick to join them, followed by Kobo, who wore the deepest frown Katara had ever seen on an eleven-year-old. They accepted the money graciously, and his mother, a tall woman with unusually short hair for a Water Tribe woman, gave Aang a bear hug which he happily returned. They all waved at the tribe once more before descending from the podium.

"30 minutes, town square, food and drink - 30 minutes, everyone!" Aang announced, then made a final bow, making a quick wrap-up of the event.

He made his way down from the stage, hesitant to make eye contact with Katara until he'd reached the last step, unable to look elsewhere - she was there, waiting for him impatiently. They exchanged a quick, awkward kiss before Katara mustered a smile for him.

"That went great!" she chirped. "Everyone loved it. You did a great job." Her hand rested on his arm and she gave it a light squeeze, trying to convey nothing but pride and cheer for him.

He rubbed his neck, somewhat embarrassed. He didn't return her smile, a fact she tried diligently to ignore. "Thanks. I still think Sokka should have done it - but I'm always happy to help," he muttered, waving a hand. "You know, Avatar stuff."

Katara sighed, letting go of him. "It was your idea, Aang, all of it. You deserve this. I'm sorry I-"

He cut her off with another handwave. "Let's not talk about this right now, okay? I want to take you to the party and try to find any kind of food that didn't come off the bottom shelf of the sea." He smiled at her, and forced or not, she accepted it with a nod.

"Okay."

Lately there had been so much fighting, it felt like they each had a foot out the door. Katara didn't know which way was up anymore; it was one thing after another, and Aang never stuck around long enough to finish a conversation, let alone a fight. They'd dug themselves into such a deep trench, he was going to have to take months of leave from Avatar work for them to swim back up.

They walked quietly side by side through the lightly packed snow, trailing behind the rest of her people. The sun would still be up for quite a while, and everyone was eager to get indoors where they could force some semblance of night. The new ice tavern in town, which some of the men of the tribe had established after returning from battle, was purposefully darkened on summer nights and lit floor-to-ceiling with candles on winter evenings - a refusal to accept the natural seasonal cycle of the South Pole.

Frankly, Katara was pretty fond of it, and she knew why the men who'd been abroad for so long pushed so hard for it. Spending so much time in places with even setting and rising cycles made you feel more used to it than not - midnight sun and dark noon were painful now.

Children weren't usually allowed inside the tavern, but seeing as this was the most sociable place in town at night and this was a day dedicated to the harmless fun of children, an exception was made by the owner, so long as their parents were mindful of them. As they entered, they could tell the place was completely packed, and almost half the patrons were children tonight. Katara could tell without looking that Aang was smiling for real now - he loved children more than probably anything else in the world, quite possibly even more than he loved her. It didn't take him five minutes to be dragged away by a group of small boys for a game outside. Her eyes trailed after him as he left without a word to her, completely taken with his fans for the night.

Sighing, she turned away from the door and scanned the tavern for Sokka, spotting him at the bar with a half-empty mug in his hand, chatting happily with the barkeep. She pushed through the thick mass of bodies, shoving her way to the stool beside her brother. His eyes lit up as she slid clumsily onto the seat.

"Little sister!" he yelled. "Damn, that was a good race today. I wasn't expecting that. Were you expecting that? I was not expecting that." His drink splashed slightly over the sides of his mug as he shook with vigor, trying to gesticulate with full hands to emphasize just how much he was not expecting that.

Sokka looked so different from the boy he had been just a few years ago. He was pushing twenty, well past a man by Water Tribe standards, and even had some facial hair to prove it. His jaw was more pronounced now, his hair longer - though still in the wolf's tail, as it would be until the day he died. He looked a little less burdened than the rest of them; something about his ability to laugh himself out of any dark place kept him floating. She'd been jealous of her brother for a wide variety of things throughout their lives, but that had to top the list.

She laughed despite herself. "No, Sokka, I don't think anybody was expecting that. All the rest of them look so dejected. Everyone's bets were on Kika or Tikar, I think. And poor Kobo - I think it would have been better for him if neither of them had won," she mused.

"Yeah, but he'll get over it. Remember when you and I were kids? All the stuff we fought over?" Here Katara opened her mouth to agree, but was cut off before she could begin. She laughed at the irony. "No. You don't. Nobody remembers what those dumb kid fights were about, you know? That's just what brothers do. And sisters." He held his mug up in cheers, then peered down at the contents. "We need to get you one of these."

Katara chuckled. He wasn't drunk quite yet, but he had already chugged enough to get him on his way. Aang seemed to have deserted her for the night, so he couldn't be there to give her disapproving sad eyes as she ordered herself a round in celebration. To hell with it, she decided with a smile, raising her hand to get the bartender's attention.

He gave her a wide, toothy grin as she called out her order. "So where's your lover?" he teased, shoving her arm lightly. "I thought he'd be here, since this whole thing is his holiday." Sokka gestured vaguely through the air to signal 'this whole thing'.

"He's out front, playing with some of the younger boys. I don't know that he would have stayed inside long anyways."

"Still not getting along, eh?"

Her eyes flashed up at him angrily. "He doesn't like drinking, Sokka, you know that."

He raised his hands defensively. "I know, I know. But don't act like nothing's going on. Everyone's been talking about it."

Katara's cheeks flared red, and she squirmed on her wooden stool. She leaned up against the bar, eyes down. "Talking about what? What does anyone else know?"

"That you two aren't as touchy-feely as you used to be. Aang used to go stand on the tops of buildings and yell about how much he loved you, and now you two don't even look at each other if you don't have to."

"It's none of your business, Sokka," she shot back defensively. "Besides - it's not like you and Suki are in paradise right now either."

His expression sobered up for a moment. "Yeah, you're right," he said quietly, taking a long drink of his spiced cider. "But, at least I'm not pretending everything's fine when it's not. That's what you're doing, and it's making it worse."

"Maybe so."

They were quiet for a moment before Sokka brightened up again, seeing her drink arrive. "But hey! For tonight, you can keep putting it off like normal. Drink up!"

She rolled her eyes and smiled, obliging. "Have you talked to Dad?" she asked after a large swig.

"Yeah," he muttered. "No luck. It's like… he doesn't want to be home. He's so insistent that he needs to live in the Earth Kingdom, and I don't know why."

Katara reached over and patted her brother's shoulder, seeing his face fall. What a roller coaster night this was for him. "There's a lot of sadness here, Sokka. He lost his wife here. I wouldn't want to stay, if I were him."

"I mean, it would be fine, I guess, if I could go too. He shouldn't be able to force me to stay. It's not right. And it's-" he burped, loudly "-it's messed up, because three years ago I would have given anything for the chance to be Chief. It was all I wanted. I just want to feel like that again. Or at least - I want to want to. I want to... want to want to?" Sokka's face scrunched up as he struggled to express this train of thought.

"Maybe just give him time. He has to realize eventually you have responsibilities elsewhere. But you know - you're going to have to have a family for him to take it completely seriously."

Sokka burped again. "Ugh - why are we talking about all this? I came out to have a good time, and, honestly, I'm feeling pretty attacked right now."

"Hey - you started it!"

By the time Katara made it back to her hut, Aang was already home and asleep. Well - it wasn't really his home, just hers, or at least that seemed to be where they had left off on the issue.

She sighed deeply and took off her shoes and coat, careful not to make too much noise, folding them up and placing them on the trunk at the foot of her bed. Aang was sleeping face down, his thin frame expanding just slightly beneath the thick woolen quilt, the one that Gran-Gran had made for her while she was traveling with Aang and Sokka. Sliding in bed beside him always filled her with deep longing, as well as an off-kilter sense of dread. She took a deep breath, slipping off her dress with shaking hands and letting it fall quietly to the floor. Katara pulled the covers up over her, curling up against Aang's wiry body.

For all their distance and unease, a part of her still wanted desperately to close the gap between them and feel him close, even just for a night. Chances were slim, she knew, but spirits help keep her from trying.

Katara didn't know how long she lay there awake, unwilling to move and toss around to try to fall asleep. There was a knot deep in the pit of her stomach, even as she held him, and she was terrified to shatter the moment. Her mind, as much as she willed it quiet so she could have her small slice of peace, traced back through the last few fights they had had, poring over every word, every shift in body language, dissecting it all as if there was something she could do about it now.

#

"You did what?"

Aang stared up at her, confused. "I - asked the White Lotus for advice?" he repeated, tilting his head just a bit. "What's wrong?"

Katara pressed her fingers to her temples, already feeling a headache coming on. "Why would you tell other people about our personal business, Aang? Especially without asking me?"

Aang frowned, standing up from the table. "You said we needed to get help, Katara! I thought I was doing what you wanted." He placed his plate with the stack of dirty dishes that she was working on - failing to offer to help, she noticed with a shred of bitterness.

"Yeah - we need to get help. Together. After we've talked about it and decided who to speak to and then we do it together. Not that you get to go off and tell everyone how miserable we are." She dropped the water she was using - not paying attention and frustrated were bad conditions to be bending in, as it turned out.

"Well - how was I supposed to know?" he asked defensively. "You didn't exactly elaborate when you yelled at me that we needed help."

"I didn't get a chance to - you ran off, just like you always do," she spat back. Katara dropped the water again, having tried to restart, ultimately deciding to give up. The dishes would be there later - it wasn't like Aang was going to do them.

He bristled at that. "I don't like to fight, Katara, you know that. I don't understand what's so bad about wanting to calm down so we can talk."

"You don't come back to talk!" She shouted. "That's what's so bad about it! You don't just not fight - you won't even talk to me!"

"And you won't talk - all you want to do is yell!" he shouted back at her, throwing his hands up. "So, are you happy now? Is this what you wanted?"

Katara was crying before she knew it. He was right, and she knew it - and yeah, as much as she needed him to engage in a fight with her, it still didn't feel good.

"I just want you to stay!"

"Well, I'm here. Say whatever you want."

She paused for a minute, trying to collect her thoughts. She'd never gotten this far before. There was so much on the tip of her tongue - sex, intimacy, the fact that he was keeping something from her and had been for a very long time - that she didn't even know where to start. Katara looked up at him helplessly, tears still brimming her eyes.

Apparently, that just made Aang angrier. "All that, and you don't even have anything to say to me. Great." He swiveled around and grabbed his staff, leaning against the door frame as it always was - ready for quick takeoff, Katara noted, not for the first time - and made his way out the door.

She had lost count of how many times he had left her standing there alone, swimming in a pool of her own misery.

#

Katara, flinching at the too-recent memory, tightened her grip around Aang reflexively. She squeezed him too tightly, apparently, as she heard him start to cough - she quickly let go, and he lifted his head tiredly. The stubble on his head scratched her just a bit as he turned over to look at her, eyes bleary with sleep.

"Hey," he mumbled.

Her heart skipped a beat, a flash of hope running through her, and she reached over to hold him again. He flinched - barely noticeable, but still there - and he took her hand gently in his. "I need some space," he whispered. He kissed her hand before squeezing it and letting it go.

Katara nodded, throat closing up and unable to say anything. He rolled back over, scooting away and pulling the comforter up over his arrow.

The next morning found them on either side of the bed, much the same way the night had left them. Katara was used to feeling cold as she woke up, but this was bone-chilling - especially for summer. She reached over onto the floor to grab her dress, and put it on while still lying down, trying to warm up the fabric before she had to get up.

Aang, as per usual, was already up an about, using that fancy airbending trick that she'd never fully understood to warm himself up. She could smell that he was preparing breakfast - the vegetarian oat plate that Katara almost always passed up.

Today, she suddenly decided, she would make the effort. An olive branch, of sorts. Because this - the silence between shouts - all of it had to stop. And it had to start somewhere.

Her feet padded silently along the floor as she came up behind him, reaching up (only recently had he gotten taller than her, causing her to stretch up for contact) to press her lips to his cheek. "Good morning," she rasped, still imbued with sleep.

Aang turned and swayed back to look down at her. "Hey."

"Can I have some?" she asked, pointing hopefully down towards the pot, trying her best to look bright-eyed and happy.

"Um -" he stuttered, his gaze following her gesture down to the oats, "well, I-I didn't really make enough for two. You don't usually eat with me," he said quietly, sounding just the smallest bit guilty.

"I can help cook some more so we can eat together," she offered, turning from him to look through their small pantry on the far side of the kitchen space.

"We're out," he said flatly. "I didn't restock since - since I'm leaving tomorrow."

Katara froze for a moment, before remembering - he had mentioned, in passing, a meeting with the Ba Sing Se council, something about city planning. "Oh." She put her hands on her hips, switching her search from oats to her normal breakfast - sea prune bites.

"Did you have fun last night?" she asked, voice an octave too high, after a prolonged silence lapsed between them. "I didn't see you after you left with the kids."

The only sound for a moment was the clanking of pottery as he poured himself a bowl and grabbed a spoon. Aang, perfectly warm with only pants and socks on, treaded lightly over to the table, tucking his lanky legs underneath him as he sat down on one of the two polar seal fur cushions.

"Yeah, I did."

Unable to keep conversation going on her own, she focused on her own meal for a while, shying away from asking Aang to start a fire for her and struggling to get it going. He didn't offer to help - she was pretty sure he wasn't paying her any attention.

By the time she finally got to sit down with her meal, Aang was finishing up, scraping his bowl for the last little bits he could find. She blew on her hot prunes, biting into them without noticing the taste, staring wistfully at the wall behind Aang's head.

To her surprise, despite finishing his food, he didn't get up from the table. He sat across from her, staring down at the table intently, some deep thought playing out across his expression. "I've been thinking," he said after a long silence, "about my trip. I think - I think I'm going to head down today, instead of tomorrow. They're heading into rainy season, and I'm afraid I'll hit a storm on my way there, I don't want to be l-"

"Stop."

He blinked, looking up at her, meeting her eyes for the first time in what felt like forever. "Huh?"

"I know what you're doing. You can just say you don't want to be here."

He didn't have a response for that. He still hadn't moved from the table, though his bowl now sat empty between them.

Katara took a deep sigh, and the words tumbled out before she had even consciously processed them. "I can't do this anymore."

"Can't do what?"

"This. You, leaving me whenever something goes wrong, or you don't want to talk about something. I can't handle it anymore. I'm lonelier with you than I am when you're gone, and it's gone on too long." Normally, these words would be streaming out of her in a stream of fury, accompanied with yelling and hands on hips and tears. But she was resigned; her voice sounded devoid of hope - or any emotion at all.

Aang was unusually still. It was rare to see him not fidgeting - playing with his air marbles, fiddling with his thumbs, pacing, channeling some outlet for all of his 116 year old energy. "You... you want to take another break?"

He was referring, of course, to the three other times they had split up over the years - never with the conscious intention of staying apart forever. They'd been able to cover it up by taking trips to separate places, and passively letting everyone assume that they were still talking via letters, even if they weren't. They were young, they reasoned. Neither of them had done this before. It was going to take some time to sort things out.

But enough was enough. She was eighteen now, an adult, and their relationship was childish. If he wouldn't respond to her - her attempts to talk, to fight, to make peace, to have any semblance of a romantic relationship - it was time to stop wasting the effort.

"No," she said quietly. She couldn't keep his gaze; she didn't want to see the way his face fell. "Not another break. When you're done with this trip, don't come back, Aang."

author's note: what's up nerds

i'm super excited about this fic, updates may be slower than ideal as i'm finishing my last year of school and working simultaneously. however, as with my FMA fic (which i am about 3/4 done with the next chapter), i'm putting my seal of promise on this that it will be seen through to completion.

pls leave me thoughts, comments, criticisms, and excited gushing over the upcoming reboot in the review box~

Cover Art Credit: Nymre