Author's Note:

Well greetings everyone! Today I present to you a short little erotic ditty about Kylo and Rey being stuck in an elevator together (get the pun in the title? Subtle, right? Well it's going to be that kind of story!)

This is more than just a short smut story, though. October 1st marked my 2 year anniversary to the world of fanfiction and fiction writing in general and of course I wanted to do something special to celebrate! Specifically, I'm hoping to tempt writers of all levels to do what they do best. To this, I've created a sort of writing guide for both establish fanfic writers well as complete newbie's to help encourage them to join in on the Reylo community fun.

IF YOU"RE JUST HERE FOR THE STORY:

Jump ahead to chapter 5, cleverly titled Kylo and Rey Fuck in an Elevator (spoilers!). It's a fun story and I hope you'll like it!

Okay, now the rest of these next four chapters are going to be me gibbering about various writing design and theory topics. The whole purpose of posting this is to encourage as many new Reylo fics (or really, any fanfiction writing at all!). Two years ago I was a newbie who wanted to write but was so, so unsure and nervous. Now I'm here to hopefully smooth the way for first time writers and, if you're an experienced writer already, hopefully this guide can offer you some interesting shop talk. I like to chat a lot. You've probably guessed that by now. And I've read a TON of writing guides, books, blogs, you name it. Time to channel Corrine from Threadbanger: Let's get started, shall we?

HOW TO USE THIS GUIDE (er, and by guide, I mean fanfiction…)

I've divided this "story" up into 6 chapters. Chapter 5 is the actual fanfiction itself, no notes, just writing. Chapter 1 is about to go into general story design topics, chapter 2 is where I present a challenge to any writers or writers-to-be out there. Yeah, that's right. You've just been dared. Dared to write a Reylo fic. If I could figure out how to embed a video of the family on Arrested Development doing their chicken impersonations I would right now. Challenged. Boom.

Chapter 3 is three different levels of outlines I've prepared. Feel free to skip it or not use them, but I've organized them in three levels of hand-holding as it were from a very brief talk about general structure of a 1 shot for the experienced writers to a full breakdown of my STORY and an intermediate step.

Um, where was I? Right, chapter 4 is some more technical aspects of fanfiction writing like some tips I've learned about the blurb, keywords, etc. 5 is the STORY. And chapter 6 has some final notes and words of encouragement and writing-mom pearls of wisdom.

Since I'm anal like this, here's a chapter index for easy reference:

1: general story design tips

2: Avdal's Reylo Challenge TM

3: six outlines and how to use them

4: technical misc

5: Kylo And Rey Fuck in an Elevator

6: Final Thoughts (as if you haven't heard me ramble on enough by this point, well here's some more!)

PART ONE: GENERAL STORY DESIGN TIPS, TRICKS, AND TALK

1. Choosing Topics

No matter how long or short your story is, you're going to be spending on it a good amount of the most precious commodity on Earth: your time. The last thing you want to do is write a story you're flaccid about. If you're not interested in the topic, it WILL show. Some Do's and Don'ts of choosing a topic:

DO pick something based on a scene you've imagined out. If it sounded fun and exciting in you head, it can be made into something fun and exciting on paper, too. (And by paper I do mean text on a digital screen but sure, you can print it out, too! Hard copy that bitch!)

DO pick something inspired by your favorite scene in a movie, TV, or another fanfic. The movie doesn't have to be Star Wars. Lots of people are freaking obsessed with Pride and Prejudice or Phantom of the Opera. Got a favorite scene from somewhere else? Reylo it! But what about a favorite from another fanfic? Sounds dodgy, doesn't it? Well I know I certainly don't have to tell you to never, ever steal but yes I absolutely encourage you to take inspiration from other peoples works. And of course you can use my stories if you'd like. Here's the key to the line between inspiration and duplication: identify what THEME of the work really appealed to you and use that to get your imagination into high gear.

Example (and there will be many examples throughout this guide): in PREY, written by one of my all-time favorite authors KagamiSorciere, the central THEME of the first 1/3 of the work was about an obsessed Kylo using the tether of their force bond to stalk Rey, but stalk her in a really obsessed romantic style. Got some real Grade A classic angsty romance tropes going on there. Find the core theme of your favorite story (or favorite scene from a story) and try to identify what exactly about it resonated with you.

DO write what you really want to write, even if it's already been written 50 times. Or 500 times. Someone once said (and I can't remember who) but "the only time you'll ever read the story you really want to read is after you've written it yourself". And, you know WHY there are 50 or 500 versions of that same topic out there? Because it's a good one and people like reading it. Think about that.

DON'T write something just because it's popular even though you're not super into it. Remember DO #1? Don't be flaccid about your topic. You want to be hard and girthy for it.

Example: when I first started considering commercial writing, the '50 Shades Bad Boy Billionaire extorts an innocent virgin' schtick was HUGE. I thought about trying to cash in on that but… I did and still do find it distasteful. But if you're into that, damned well right it. Be turgid and true to yourself.

DON'T drive yourself into fits trying to find the "perfect" topic. Pick a topic that appeals to you now and write it with passion. Remember this at all times: writing should be FUN. Have fun while writing it and it will show.

DON'T judge your topic as "Good or bad". Continuation of the above, but don't ever hold yourself back because you think an idea is stupid.

Example from Going Down: I wanted to write this guide and I wanted to write a sex scene where Kylo ties Rey up with some loose wires caused by the aftermath of his lightsaber tantrums. Is that a stupid idea? Um, yeah, kinda. But who cares? Sexy fun and if it IS a stupid idea, play off that! Let you characters let you know how dumb this is and let them have their fun with it! (note from future self: that part didn't actually make it into the final story! But it started the idea for the story so good effort still!)

2: Writing on controversial topics

A few months ago there was a big thing on Tumblr about an author vs a group of people who though his/her works shouldn't have been written. I'm not going to say anymore about that or give my opinion either way, but if you are a new author or, like me who has some experience below their belt but is conflict-adverse, I would recommend you avoid touching on any of these topics (and I mean even writing on them at all):

racial issues

anything ending in -philia

more iffy topics that I personally tend to avoid are:

incest

non-con

adultery/cheating

With these three, I think you're kinda guaranteed to get a few negatives comments/reviews. The more grey area is softer non-con or dub-con which, if you tag correctly and maybe include a warning note, you might be alright with. Or you could just write the story you want to but be aware that you may take some heat for it. If you're fine with that, go forth and write, young scribe.

Also remember that you can both moderate comments or post on AO3 anonymously. Some people may consider that last option a cop-out, but I disagree. IMO the Anonymous group is open to anyone who wants to post on it for whatever reason. You do you.

ps. IF you ARE going to be writing about any of the above topics, please please please don't advertise your email, social, or tumblr. Tumblr especially will come after you for no reason other than the thrill of churning up some blood in the water. Keep it on the DL.

3) Erotica, Romance, and what rating?

Most Reylo stories are some shade of romance. It kind of goes with the whole Reylo thing and not just a "Star Wars Story". We've got every shade to choose from, from dark and kinky fuckathons to sweet adventuremances with plenty of plot fighting for screen time with the flirty gazes.

How do you know which one to write about? Well you gotta go with your gut. I've said it before and I'll say it again: WRITE THE STORY YOU WANT TO READ. If you're excited about a sweet and wholesome Holiday romance, do that. If you want to see how many inches Rey can take (or Kylo, we don't discriminate here!) then f'ing hell write that and let me know when you post it!

Write whatever you feel inspired by. I can't stress that enough, so I'm going to stress that some more.

But what about rating? Well, here's where the rub comes in: probably not nearly as many people are going to read you G rated Christmas Romance as those who will want to read "Filled to the Hilt: One Jedi Orphan's Journey to the Impossible". Sorry. I know it sucks. Write what you want to, but do be aware that the higher the rating the more viewers you'll probably attract.

Personally, I don't typically write G-T rated. Like at all. But that doesn't mean there isn't an audience for it. For instance, I was feeling in a silly mood so I wrote 'A Game of Strategy, Not Chance' which is a dumb-as-anything fluff piece. While it's not super popular, it's gotten all around warm fuzzy reviews from people who thought my silly nonsense was funny. I'll take it! Or the number of people who though DICK in 'On Ben's Knee" was a hoot. IDK why, I really don't, but I'm glad you liked it!

So, even if you write sweet and off market, you'll find yourself an audience for your piece.

Now for the rating:

E reigns king in popularity, followed closely by M. The difference is subjective and differs by the site. For me, E pieces are extremely explicit and graphic. M pieces can have exactly the same theme and plot, just toned down in the detail of the descriptions. On AO3 and Tumblr anything goes (remember to tag!), and is M or less. I talk a little more about the different sites in section 4: technical aspects.

T ratings seem to have a smaller but dedicated audience. These are the people who really want a fun story. Not that M or E fics don't have plot, but T is a good zone for fics with some swexiness and a whole lot of non-romance things going on too.

G is a tough sell, TBH. A lot of people don't read them at all, I guess because they're perceived as dull and like a chaste Christians's Children show in the midwest? That's at least the perception I've noticed. If you want to write a G fic, my suggestion would be to do a search for Reylo fics with a G rating, then sort by either hits or comments/kudos. Find the fics that have the most viewer response, and read their comments to get a feel for what people liked about them. I know this is slightly contradictory to my whole "write what you want to write" platform, but this is about market research. You want to find that sweet spot where your preferences and reader's preferences overlap.

4: Getting down to business: plotters, pantsers, planning, and pre-planning

Plotters and pantsers: if you have any idea what these mean, you've probably read a writing book before! It seems like every single design theory book talks about this in its own way: do you outline the plot of your stories before you write (plotters), or do you fly by the seat of your pants (get it?) and let the story evolve as you go?

Like everything else in the world of writing life, there are many shades on each side as well as middle ground where you wear your plotting pants with pride. Rachel Aaron, author of the excellent resource '2k to 10K' is very very much a plotter. She writes very detailed plots, world building, character sheets, timelines, you name it. I plot too, though not nearly to the level that she does. On the other side are the pantsers like Ray Bradbury and Stepehn King. They like to be surprised by their own stories and feel it creates a more organic, natural, and less forced piece of fiction if they have only a general whiff of direction in the air before they put fingers to keyboard.

So who's right? Do plotters suffer from the rigidity of their own construction while pantsers are free and expansive? Or do plotters benefit from actually knowing what they're about to write about while pantsers universally are going to have a really, ahem, interesting time editing down their whimsy? Stephen King once said in an interview that his 300k books started off as 600k epics of more nonsense than coherence and he literally had to prune and shape his story down by half. Half being 300k. That's like 6 normal, non-Stephen King novels. That's like half a year's writing for me. The thought of having to scrap that much makes me… itchy in strange places. Like the back of my cerebellum.

But, of course, that's the method that works for Stephen King and he seems to do quite well for himself.

Again, there are no right answers.

For the sake of my upcoming challenge in the next chapter, we're not going to worry too much about plotting since we're going to be doing a 1 short shortie. But, if you're curious to learn more about both plotters and pantsers and plotting pantsers, go get my #1 all time bible of writing guides that I keep talking about in my stories: Plot and Structure by James Scott Bell. He has a whole detailed breakdown of different techniques to make the most out of both styles. And the book is less than $10 and pretty much the essential guide I've used for the last 2 years.

5: The importance of preplanning your scenes:

This applies to both plotters and pantsers and is probably the key thing I've learned the hard way over these last two years: before you write a scene, think about what's going to happen. Seems freaking obvious, doesn't it? Your characters have to be doing something, if that something is starting wistfully out of window thinking statically about what might have been. No matter what sort of planner you are, I recommend spending 5 minutes or even just one minute sitting down quietly and scribbling notes about what actually happens during the scene. I usually separate the physical and mental, but that's up to you and your own unique style. I don't think I explained this too clearly, so here are some individual scene examples:

Example 1 from a chapter of No Rest for the Wicked: Rey wakes up next to a severely injured Kylo and tries to leave him until the power of their bond and her own good conscience forces her to return to his side. Key events: wake up, reaction to Kylo laying there, leaving the crash site, struggling in the jungle, "sensing" Kylo, feeling compelled to return, reluctantly returning all the while kicking herself for doing so. Note to self: focus on the inner roller coaster of emotions Rey is feeling. Estimated length*: 2k.

That "scene" pretty much covers a whole chapter. And the * is because I write long. Like looong, long. For many authors this might be 750-1200k or less.

How about a shorter example? Here's the outline for a a fictional conversation I just made up: (let's say this is a fic where Kylo's kidnapped Rey and she sees an opportunity to escape, modern AU). What happens: Rey is restrained in the passenger seat but has gotten free of her handcuffs. Kylo steps out of the car to get (something) and she sees the keys in the ignition and debates if she can risk driving off. Key events: testign the slackness of the handcuffs, testing range of movements (can she reach the wheel?), looking around to see where he is, debating on if she can do it or even if she SHOULD. Note to self: to keep up the pace of this scene, have some inner dialogue but use short sentences. Intersperse with action beats. Scene ends with Rey deciding not to leave and Kylo returning. Note to self: maybe this was a setup by him to test er? Maybe her decision to not leave at this point will feature later on in the story? Estimated length: up to 500 words.

Okay, so the above is just a madeup example, but hopefully you see how I personally would pre-type plan this scene. And would also have an overall plot which would show how this scen would fit in with everything.

Third example for the pantsers, this time it's just a super short action plot of the above scene: Rey breaks free of her handcuffs, Kylo leaves car, Rey decides if she can/should drive off without him.

Aaaand, end that plot note. If you're a pantser, I think that having a hint of direction will help with not spinning your wheels and staring at he blank screen figuring out what happens.

A note for serious plotters: I tried doing really detailed scene breakdowns when I first started writing. I found they inhibited me and I spent more time wrestling with the outline then I did trying to make the prose work. Some people (ala Rachel Aaron) might not have this problem. If you're new to writing, why not try writing a scene in three or four different ways and see what works best? Just write one paragraph just for practice. Here's a prompt:

post Last Jedi, Kylo and Rey have to cuddle for warmth in a cave (since this is probably the trope to end all tropes). Why? Don't matter. Try writing it several different ways and start with completing this sentence: "Kylo unzipped the sleeping bag- their only sleeping bag- and" (and take it from there!)

Go on. You have a 100 word maximum limit. Try writing it three or four times, starting with the least/pantsiest minimum of outlining and working your way more detailed on the next rounds.

5. Conflict: the core element of any work of fiction, and the AROC

Writing guidebooks are peppered with examples of what not to do in a scene and they all typically distill into a character facing no conflict or opposition. Or a character having no goal and therefore no conflict or opposition.

Let's Reylo this example up: Rey is hungry. She goes to where she stores food at her ATAT and pulls out a portion. She prepares it, eats it, then goes about her day. Next scene is her off into the desert scavenging, feeling less hungry.

Right… so this scene suffers from several things, first and foremost being that, unless Rey is about to get struck by a severe case of morning-munchies based botulism, the scene is useless filler that served no purpose in the greater story. How to fix this?

A. cut it out. Don't need it? Take it out. B. do what the movie did and use Rey's hunger to show her plight in life and bring the audience onto her side. C. add in some conflict. Just as Rey is about to pour water onto her portion, an intruder busts in and tries to take it from her. Or the portion was secretly a love portion planted by Kylo to make her fall head over heels with the next person she sees and, oh wait, was that a knock at her door? Okay, I'm being silly with the last one, but you get the idea: make the scene interesting or else.

Conflict conflict conflict. First establish what the character wants (Rey wants nummies) and then put something in opposition to it (Kylo wants Rey).

AROC. This is the acronym I build all scenes on. Action, Reaction, Objective, Conflict.

Action leads to reaction. This is the physical "what goes on in a scene". Kylo traps Rey in an elevator with him. They fight then bump like bunnies in the springtime. There are going to probably be many cycles of this throughout every scene. Action: Kylo smashes the control panel on the elevator, breaking it. Reaction: Rey is fucking pissed off. Action: Kylo gets horny (yes, it is going to be that classy kind of story, how did you guess?). Reaction: Rey notices his boner, has a reaction to it. Action: They go at it. Reaction: well, spoilers for ch4!

So we've got the AR of AROC, now for the OC: objective, conflict. This is the emotional, mental part of the scene and for every AR is an OC. Objective: Kylo wants to talk to Rey, conflict: Rey is still pissed off about Crait and now even more pissed that he cornered her here. (This set leads into Kylo smashing the computer panel). Objective: Kylo realizes that they're trapped in the elevator… and no one is watching. Conflict: Rey realizes that they're trapped in the elevator and no one is watching. Sometimes have your characters have ostensibly the same OC, this sort of miscommunication parallel is a staple in comedy and it can breathe some life into a scene if you feel like it's dragging.

So, whether you're a plotter or a pantser, keep the AROC in mind as you write. Frequently ask yourself:

What action is happening? What will be the reaction to the action? What is the character's objective? What conflict or speedbump will they encounter to that objective?

If you;'re a plotter, chances are you've already got a few ideas about the AROCs, if you're a pantser than remember AROC as a guide to keeping your scenes on track if you feel them wandering out of the plot corral too far.

6) On Writing Faster

Storytime: when I wrote my first fanfic 2 years ago, Bad Habits of a Vivid Imagination, can you guess how long it took me to write this 5k wank piece? One month. One full month. That comes to a little over 150 words a day, and you'd better believe I wasn't working on it every day in a productive manner. I was focusing on editing as I go, agonizing on every word, and I had an intense and crippling fear of being judged for writing smut. That last part I've grown out of, if you haven't guessed. I was trapped in that circle of self doubt merged with not knowing what I was doing or exactly what I was trying to accomplish. Don't do that. Write smarter, and you'll write faster too. Guaranteed.

There are a lot of different techniques for writing faster, but the basic core idea is to just keep writing and write consistently. Here are some tricks that I've collated over the two years since, some of these I use and some just didn't work out for me but results will very much vary:

write first thing in the morning, within 5 minutes of waking up when your mind is still in a semi-sleep state. Write for 10, 15, 30 minutes.

Set yourself a daily quota. If you feel you can write 300 words a day, make your quote 10% more at 330. Now round it up to 350. 350 words a day is your quota. Or 500 becomes 550 which rounds up to 600. Etc.

Set yourself a WEEKLY quota. Say 2,000 words a week or a little less than 300 a day. This way, if you skip a day, you can make up for it later on.

Write in pomodoros. These are 25 minute section of non stop DISTRACTION FREE writing. Turn off your wireless. Turn your phone to silent, face down. Better yet, put your phone in another room. If being away from it for 25 minutes seems daunting, seek help. Joking on that last part since I'm a technophobe, but also not really :P. Take 5 minutes off between each pomodoro. That 25 write, 5 break, 25 write, end just under an hour. Start with doing one of these "sets" a day and build up.

Buy an Alphasmart. The Alphasmart Neo and Neo2 were clunky writing devices from a decade ago with a built in screen and very limited functionality. They're no longer being made, but you can get one on ebay for around $20. They're actually very comfortable to type on and they have limited functionality that only allows them to type and nothing more. No internet. No spell corrections. Editing is a pain. They let you type and produce and not do anything else. Get it now?

Yes. Exactly. Forced, distraction free writing productivity. If you're brand new to writing you can pass until you know if writing is for you, but for anyone who writes even occasionally it's one $20 investment that can make a HUGE differences in your wordcount output. It did for me, at least.

Write to music? Very personal, some people can't stand music at all. For me it depends on the scene. I love Solar Fields (ambient chillout music) for most scenes, for fighting or action scenes including sexytimes I go for heavy metal like Nine Inch Nails and Rob Zombie, and for dialogue nothing at all. Check out Solar Fields, Klaus Schultze and GMO vs Dense on youtube. That's my kind of music but again results vary.

So how much DO I write now? I debated if I should answer this or not (this being a question I proposed at myself), but now I average 4-6 pomodoros and anywhere from 600-1400 words a pomodoro. Big range there but certain scenes just flow much better than others. So anywhere between 2400 to 8400 a day. I don't write every day, but I try to. Again Rachel Aaron's 2k to 10k is a great resource. The closest I've ever gotten was around 9200 in day. For me, planning is everything, but no matter if you're a plotter or pantser I believe that, if you're finding it hard or unpleasant to write, something is wrong with the scene or possibly the whole story itself. The exception being if you're a brand new writer and then… well, like me with my mighty 5k in a month, there's a chance that the first stepes may just be like pulling teeth and they suck and you hate them and you just ave to power through. Or not. Don't psyche yourself out, and remember the mantra: write what you want to read. Writing should be fun, not a competition.

And, speaking of a competition, Ms. Rachel Aaron herself posted her writing numbers and she actually writes more than I do but a lot slower. Her 2-pomodoro-hour cycles get her around 1100 but she writes more of them.

If you're doing the writing challenge in ch2 of this I'll talk more about the word count, but for now just focus on telling yourself to write "a little more". If you only write for half and hour once a week, make it 35 minutes. Put in a conscious effort of just writing a teeny bit more each time.

And a final tip on writing faster, if you're writing a piece over several writing sessions (ie. you don't finish it all at once) try the age old trick of ending mid sentence. That way, when you start up next time, you'll already have an exact startoff point and once you finish the sentence hopefully you'll just keep on going because no one likes a sentence that just breaks off mi

7. what is a good length for fanfiction?

Whee, more purely subjective narcissism! Here's my own preferences for what I like to read and write.

For 1-shot fics, 3500 feels like a good spot. Sometimes up to 6k but I feel my mind usually start to wander after the 5k mark. A great example of a long 10 one shots I freaking loved was A Lady Shall not Promenade Alone by KagamiSorciere /works/8139538. It's 10k of pure delight. Like delightful really is the best word I can think of to describe it.

For multi-chapter pieces (beyond the scope of this challenge), I've identified 2 main categories I like to read plus an outlier First I like the 30k, 7-ish chapter novellas as seen in the fabulous (or dare I say… delightful?) series Monsters are We All by DragonWhispers. This length is perfect for my short attention span. You can tell a full story at novella length, but it's fast paced enough that there's literally no time FOR the story to drag. Perfect!

Next is the proper novel length that's common in commercial ebooks. 50-75k. I'm trying my darnest to become a commercially successful author at the 50k at $2.99 or 60k+ at $3.99 is a very standard and accepted ratio. For fanfiction of course it's free (we don't want to be sued, right?) but there's a very stable audience at the 50-75k word count and this gives you all the storyarc and character development that's possible with novells but now with some more room for bells, whistles, and pretty-pretties.

Finally there's the "long ass book" wordcount of 75k and up. I've written one story at this length, No Rest for the Wicked, and it's both my most popular story and also one that I've decided is just too dang long. However, some of the greatest Reylo fics ever devised have been of this epic length. I'm going to have a whole list of reading recommendations at the end of ch5, but some immediate standouts at this length are:

PREY by KagamiSorciere

What the Hell is Wrong With Kylo Ren? By Tuli Azzameen

Commemoration by wineandpotatochips

A Collision of Stars by dustoftheancients

8. Where I gibber about handling exposition

Exposition is a very tricky part of writing that even some of the most seasoned of mega name writers like Jonothan Kellerman occasionally lock horns with. For my writing challenge I give very specific instructions on how to handle exposition in your challenge 1-shot, but for this general writing tips section what I can say is that less is 10000% more. Have faith in your readers. You don't need to tell them Rey is a brave but lonely character. We've seen it ourselves and, far better than stating is, is throw Rey into a scene with conflict (that all important C word) where she gets to show off her bravery and loneliness.

Show not tell. This has been beated to death by fiction books ever since the Godfather of Showing Dashiel Hammet first Sam Spaded his way into the world of popular fiction. That world was never the same and it was absolutely for the better.

So I'm not going to go on anymore about exposition and showing other than to emphasize that we are discerning readers as well as writers. Trust us to read between the lines.

9. Scared of smut?

Well I sure was, at least of writing it! A big part of what held me back from writing Bad Habits of a Vivid Imagination in, oh, under a month was a fear of smut writing. I'd certainly read enough, so I knew the subject matter wasn't the problem, but something else was.

For me I think it was a fear of being judged. So, if you find yourself crippled by smutparalysis, what can you do? First reassure yourself, that whatever you're writing, there's already a far filthier, nastier, more debauched version of it out there that someone's already beaten you to. Then consider trying what I did with my third story, the uber-smutty A Vulgar Display of Power. For this fic I unleashed my characters and let them be as vulgar and explicit as they wanted to be. Which turned out to be pretty damned E rated. I wrote basically the filthiest thing I could ever imagine and I wasn't even sure if I would publish it, so go ahead, try that: write an explicit sex scene, but write it true to yourself. Don't be afraid of really getting into those descriptions of what's going where and how, good or bad, it makes the characters feels. For some people, you may naturally find a milder more vanilla happy place. That's perfect and you will absolutely have an audience because not everyone wants to read about insertions, sounding, cumshots, everything going everywhere. Some people just want to read a sexy but not necessarily blow by blow accurate account of Kylo and Rey getting it on.

Or you could spend you 1-7k wordcount writing a loving description of Rey getting a facial and detail where each rope of sploodge lands exactly on her body. You do you (and again let me know if that IS what you write because now I kinda want to read that scene!)

Ahem. Yeah. Smutparalysis. Write it smutty and then you have 3 options:

save it or delete it if you feel compelled. But please save it but never publish it if you don't want to.

Publish it. Publish that bitch. I did with Bad Habits and I honestly didn't read the reviews until 3 days later and when I was thoroughly drunk because I was so scared of bad reviews. Does it help if I tell you I'm still waiting for the first one? All my reviews were positive. That helped me a lot.

Option 3: publish anonymously. Again that's what the anonymous collection on Ao3 is all about. Publish it there. If you want to use other sites like tumblr or , create a new throwaway account. Leave no traces of who you are and I think you'll still be pleased with the results.

10. a brief history of not editing

You know Marcel Proust? This world famous author drove himself into fits of alcoholic, agonizing, abject misery trying to find the right word for every part of every sentence. He's also regarded as possibly the best wordsmith in the history of all time, but don't do that to yourself. Write fast and with passion and if it's kinda clunky who cares? Writing is entertainment, not a battle.

Do you know who my personal favorite author is? Well, me neither, but one of my top 3 has to be Dean Koontz. He is the only author I would ever allow to write at me a 3 page long paragraph. His choice of words and sentence structure and sheer eloquence are breathtaking. He is a true master of his craft. A Proust of the modern era.

He also edits as he goes, making sure each paragraph and sentence within it is "right" before he moved on. To quote my other mentor James Scott Bell: "that way lies madness". Don't do it. Don't do that to yourself, ESPECIALLY if you're anything less than a New York Times selling author. Trust me, there are more pleasant ways to lose your mind. Like drinking absinthe or chronic masturbation. Going around the bend from self editing isn't the way.

So when DO you edit? Well I can say that,as I've written more, my stories need less and less editing. I generally give it a pass after I finish where I run a spellchecker and do a readthrough. Sometimes, if it's just a dumb one-shot, that's all I do. Sometimes I'll spend upwards of maybe 3 hours editing, but that's pushing it. There are whole books just about editing, two I like are:

Revision & Self Editing by (guess) James Scott Bell

and

Revision is a Process by Catherine E McLean

The McLean book is definitely more targeted toward novels, be aware, and she also used an annoyingly big font size (ahem!) so only get it used at a good price. Still she has some good points in there, so it's worth checking out.

Just remember this mantra: you gotta have something to edit. Write first, edit later.

11. Just do it: the Oxford Comma

Soap box time: the American AP style says not to use the Oxford comma, the rest of the world says one, two, three is written like that not one, two three. Be better than the AP, that obnoxious thing we've all had to do for sources in college. Ask yourself why be left behind from the rest of the world as it moves on? Hashtag metricsystemworksbetter.

Or, as Chuck Palahniuk ( the un-adjectifiable author of Fight Club) so eloquently exampled in his spirited defense of why he uses the 'Oxford C', spot what's wrong with this sentence: "I once had dinner with Nelson Mandela, an 800 pound gorilla and a dildo enthusiast." Probably shouldn't be calling Nelson Mandela any of those things, just sayin'.

So use the Oxford Comma. Be part of the solution, not the problem.

12. If you get stuck (the ubiquitous writer's block section)

Every writer gets writer's block. Period. You could argue poor, tortured Proust never did NOT have writer's block. Do a search on "overcoming writer's block" and you'll find everything from taking a walk and doing people watching to laying upside down and letting blood flow into your head.

I wish I could say I had a solution to writer's block. I don't. I really don't. But, sure, try this:

have a cup of strong coffee

watch your favorite scene in the SW movies

spend 20 minutes re-reading your favorite SW fanfiction

by now your coffee should have kicked in so get typing while you're all hopped up!

Write the scene you've always wanted to write. Better yet, write the scene you've always wanted to read. Make it sexy, dumb, poorly written, and even more riddled with type-os than this fic. Have a blast while doing it. Is it going to suck? Probably. Do you have to publish it anyhow? Nope. But now you've just had fun and that's 100% of the point of writing fanfiction.

Hope that helps and good luck! Now are you ready to be writing challenged? Because you're about to get writing challenged.