More than a Happy Memory

DISCLAIMER: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by J. K. Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

A/N: I'm working on posting all my fanfics from different genres on this site, so they are all archived in one place. Most of my Harry Potter fanfics were written between 2003-2005 when there were only 5 books and 4 movies. A lot of them were posted on Portkey, and my HP pen name at that time was pottergirl786. Some of my stories are still archived there. I've made some minor edits here (mostly grammatical changes), but the content of the story is the same.

This story takes place somewhere amidst Chapter Twenty-Seven ("The Centaur and the Sneak") of OotP, before the DA meeting where the members are finally found out by Umbridge.

"Great work, everyone!" Harry told his fellow DA members as they finished practicing their Stunning Spells, and the room quieted around him. "Next meeting, I think it's time to start on Patronuses."

Eager murmurs greeted this announcement as the crowd filed in twos and threes toward the door, ready to head back to their dormitories for the night.

Harry was following behind Ron, Neville, and Dean, who were chatting enthusiastically, hypothesizing what animal forms their Patronuses would take on in their next lesson.

"I wonder what yours is gonna be, Weasley?" joked Dean loudly.

Ron reddened as the others laughed and shoved Dean playfully with his elbow.

Harry chuckled along with them until he noticed Hermione had planted herself down on one of the large silk cushions that littered the floor of the Room of Requirement, looking like she had no intention of going anywhere. She was holding a book high in front of her nose, appearing extremely absorbed in it.

"Aren't you coming?" he called over his shoulder at her.

Hermione's brown eyes peered over the top of the leather-bound tome, but she only waved one hand at him absently in reply.

Harry stopped his retreat through the open doorway, causing Fred and George to stumble into him. Ron, Neville, and Dean kept walking.

"Sorry," muttered Harry, as he stepped around the twins and made his way over to Hermione's side. The book she was reading was entitled How to Conjure a Patronus in Twelve Easy Steps.

"I thought I'd get a head start on next lesson," she told him, her eyes still fixed on the page in front of her.

Harry glanced at his watch. It was twenty minutes before curfew, so they were safe at present. He sat down on a cushion next to hers.

"You don't have to wait for me," she said, finally looking up at him. She lowered the book until it rested in her lap.

Harry seized the opportunity and glanced down at the page she had been reading.

Step Number Six: Think Happy Thoughts!

There were several smiley faces all lined in a row, following this pronouncement on the page, before the author went on to describe how one went about "thinking happy thoughts." Next came examples of what constituted one. Harry did not have to read any further to see it was complete nonsense.

"Who wrote this load of rubbish?" he asked, pulling the book out of Hermione's hands. Highly affronted by this action, she tried to grab it back from him but he dodged her actions.

"I usually reserve my judgment until I've read the entire book," she said, her voice sounding defensive as she watched him flip to the last page of text where there were notes about the author.

Harry read aloud, "Galen Gladstone is the successful writer of sixteen non-fiction books, including Harmonious Happiness: The Art of Positive Thinking No Matter Where You Rest Your Rump and the exceptionally popular Laughing in the Loo, which spent an astounding one hundred and twelve weeks on the Daily Prophet's number one best sellers list. He currently lives in London with his wife, Joy; their two small children, Gladys and Merry; and their pet crup, Jester."

Shaking his head in disbelief, Harry rose from his seat and placed the book on one of the many wooden bookshelves lining the wall.

"I was reading that!" said Hermione, rising to her feet as well. "I was hoping to get some tips!"

"Trust me, Hermione," said Harry, still shaking his head. "That book was not going to help you."

She gazed at him, frowning.

"I thought a large part of conjuring a Patronus had to do with recalling happy thoughts," she said.

"It does," confirmed Harry, "but it's more complicated than that."

He paused, pondering the best way to explain it to her.

Hermione watched him fervently. In the stillness, she moved a step closer to him.

"How is it more complicated?" she asked when Harry had been silent for over a full minute.

"Well," he started tentatively, trying to remember some of the things Lupin had told him about Patronus-conjuring in the past. "First off, you must concentrate on a single, happy memory. But it can't be just any old memory or thought. There's definitely more to it than that."

Harry hesitated again, recalling Lupin's words during one of their lessons two years ago.

"It's not only about happiness," he continued slowly, "but hope, and… and desire. The feelings connected with the memory you choose must be really strong for a Patronus to work properly."

At the word "desire," Hermione's eyes had dropped from his to stare at the floor at their feet.

"Can I ask you something?" she said with some indecision, head down.

"Sure. What is it?" asked Harry curiously.

"You've conjured some pretty amazing Patronuses in the past," she said, appearing to investigate something near her shoe. "To save Sirius—"

"To save all of us," Harry murmured quietly, though he was shaking his head to deny her words. Thinking about the lake swarming with a hundred dementors as Hermione and Sirius had lain unconscious around him was still one of his most terrifying memories from his past.

"Besides, that was a fluke," he added. "If it hadn't been for the Time Turner…"

Hermione shook her head, smiling up at him now.

"It wasn't a fluke, Harry. You know it wasn't. Nor was that time last summer when you saved your cousin," she reminded him, and Harry thought back to that alleyway in Little Whinging, of Dudley crouching on the cold pavement, of the empty feeling he'd had inside as a dementor's icy fingers had closed around his throat…

And once more, the image of his friends' faces rose before Harry, filling him with the kind of energy he had used that dark night to push the two dementors away.

Hermione's voice brought him back to reality, and it was as if she had been reading his mind. "What did you think of, Harry, to drive off those dementors? Can you tell me?"

Harry remained silent for a few seconds, wondering why he felt so reluctant to say that it had been her image—her face and Ron's—that had given him the strength he had so desperately needed on that horrible night not so long ago.

He opened his mouth, prepared to tell her the truth, but Hermione spoke before he had the chance.

"It's all right, Harry. You don't have to tell me," she said softly, and she smiled at him again before looking down at her wrist. "We'd better get going, or we'll be in trouble."

But neither of them made a move for the door.

Glancing at his own watch, Harry realized they only had five minutes to reach Gryffindor Tower before nine o'clock. It was a feasible task, if they made a run for it, but they would be cutting it close at this point.

Throwing caution to the wind, Harry suggested something that surprised even him.

"Do you want to stay for a while instead? I'll help you practice your Patronus, if you want…" His voice trailed off, and he could see Hermione weighing the options in her head.

She stared at him silently for a long moment, then said, "We'll have to come up with a way to return to the common room undetected."

In the past, their biggest worry had been Filch, the caretaker, or possibly Peeves the Poltergeist. Now, they had Umbridge to worry about as well.

Still, Harry smiled at Hermione, realizing she had told him something important without really saying so.

She wanted to stay! And truth be told—so did he! Though a part of him was wondering just why he was feeling so happy about it.

Harry thought for a moment. How could they get back without getting caught? Normally, he wouldn't have been so worried about this problem, but he'd left the Marauder's Map in his dormitory. If only he'd brought—

"That's it!" he muttered more to himself than to Hermione. Moving over to the window (that he couldn't remember being there before now), Harry swung it open, raised his wand, and shouted, "Accio Invisibility Cloak!"

Moments later, the silvery cloak came soaring through the window and into Harry's waiting hands.

"Hmm, I wonder who taught you that handy spell?" said Hermione smoothly, eyeing him with a grin.

Though he was surprised at her playful tone of voice, Harry couldn't resist retorting, "Someone who was just as willing to break the rules then as she is now."

Hermione's cheeks turned slightly red.

"I only break the rules when you're involved," she said quietly.

Harry raised his eyebrows at her.

"Though I seem to recall that particular time, it was for a very good cause," she added hastily.

Harry conceded that helping him defeat a fifty-foot Hungarian Horntail without his garnering barely a scratch had been a very good cause indeed. Now it was time for him to return the favor.

Standing in the center of the room with Hermione at his side, Harry asked, "Are you ready?"

She nodded fervently. He gave her a big grin.

And so, they began…

"Expecto Patronum!" Hermione shouted much later as the silver vapor coming from her wand was finally beginning to take form. For a few seconds, the body of a small, sleek animal could be seen before the mist faded away to nothing.

"Good!" complimented Harry. "That's much better!"

He plopped down on a red silk cushion.

"Why don't we take a quick break?"

They'd taken quite a few breaks between her incantations so that Hermione could stop and rest for a while. Conjuring a Patronus, even without the threat of a dementor nearby—though they had dimmed the torches on the walls and opened the window even wider to let in the cool air, in simulation of a dementor attack—was strenuous work. The only thing Harry had found that was harder to do recently was Occlumency. But both processes, whether it was closing one's mind to outside penetration or summoning good thoughts to block out the bad, were quite similar; both took tremendous concentration and strength of mind. He could see Hermione had been steadily tiring in the past few minutes and, knowing exactly how that felt, he couldn't blame her. But Hermione did not look like she was ready to sit down at his suggestion this time.

"I'm fine. I want to continue," she said with determination.

Watching her warily, Harry stayed where he was seated.

"You'll feel better if you rest first. Besides, we're going to be working on Patronuses all next meeting. You don't have to perfect this tonight," he reminded her, but asking Hermione not to perfect something she tried was like asking the sun not to rise in the East.

"No," Hermione repeated. "I want to continue."

Harry sighed and rose once more to stand by her side.

"Maybe it will help if I conjure it with you," he suggested, raising his wand in preparation. Lupin had never tried this tactic with him, but Harry thought it couldn't hurt to give it a shot. "On the count of three, okay?"

Hermione nodded.

"One, two, three… Expecto Patronum!"

Harry's voice rang out all by itself. A silver stag erupted from the end of his wand and galloped once around the room before disappearing into thin air. Hermione's jaw dropped open at the sight. Her own wand was still raised in mid-air though she had never uttered a sound. He turned and looked at her inquiringly.

"Why didn't you try it with me?" he asked her.

Hermione shook her head, staring blindly at the spot where the stag had vanished across the room from them.

"Do you want to try it again?" he asked tentatively. Maybe she was too tired to continue and was only attempting to put on a brave front.

Hermione, however, nodded once more.

Maybe he had not given her enough time to come up with a proper happy thought. Not that there was much time in a real-life situation, faced with real dementors and overwhelming feelings of cold and misery. Still, Lupin had let him establish some solid memories before letting him so much as utter the advanced charm.

Wondering what memories she had been using before, Harry decided whatever they were, they had not been strong enough. Coming up with a plan, he told Hermione to close her eyes. He guessed she thought she had misheard him for she was staring wide-eyed, looking more than a little doubtfully at him.

"You trust me, don't you?" he asked, slightly amused at Hermione's expression.

The look in her eyes changed immediately. It had been an unnecessary question.

"All right, then," Harry tried again. "Now, do as I say and close your eyes."

Hermione's lips pursed together as if she wanted to protest, but she did as she was told and dropped her eyelids.

For a second, Harry was startled by the image of Hermione standing before him, eyes closed, and lips turned up in slight expectancy. He could tell she was wondering what he was up to by the quirk of her brow, but the openness with which she stood there completely nonplussed him. For a moment, Harry had the crazy idea that he could have kissed her, and she would not have protested.

Pushing aside that perfidious thought, Harry moved around to stand behind Hermione. When he touched her shoulder, she jumped slightly at the contact but didn't move away from him.

"First, I want you to forget whatever you were thinking about before, no matter how happy you thought that memory made you feel in the past. Okay?" he whispered in her ear.

Hermione inclined her head toward the sound of his voice and nodded.

"Good," he said, trying not to notice how close her cheek was to his own. His body, however, was more traitorous than his mind, and he involuntarily leaned forward. His chest just barely grazed the back of her robes. His right hand, still holding his wand, slid from her shoulder down her forearm.

"Think of the happiest feeling you've ever felt, the most hopeful moment you've ever had…"

This time Harry excluded mentioning the word "desire," though if Hermione wasn't feeling it, he certainly was—though he never in a million years would have admitted it at that particular moment, even to himself.

"Imagine those feelings magnified a thousand times over," he continued in a low tone of voice, "until nothing is important but preserving those feelings. Make them want to last forever…"

Harry continued sliding his hand down Hermione's arm until it rested over her own warm fingers. Wand arm to wand arm, they stood, his hand touching hers, their wands tapping each other's lightly, issuing random sounds like notes of music in the still air. With his fingers curled over Hermione's hand and his own wand, Harry raised both their arms together until they were parallel with the floor.

Harry's other hand had moved to Hermione's waist, though he didn't realize it until later. His focus was on Hermione's breathing, on the little he could see of her face—until her cheek met his and he was too close to watch her expressions any longer—and on their outstretched arms pointing ahead of them, ready to voice their incantations.

This time Harry didn't have to count. He felt when Hermione was ready, when he was ready…

"Expecto Patronum!"

The spell burst forth from them both with lightning clarity. Harry sensed rather than saw Hermione open her eyes.

Two Patronuses, perfectly formed, had erupted simultaneously from the ends of their touching wands. His, a shining stag, more brilliant in shape and color than Harry had ever seen it, strode proudly ahead of them, erect and alert, its head held high in regal fashion. It pranced a few feet in front of them and stopped, as though waiting for something to follow behind it. As if on cue, Hermione's Patronus, a bright silver otter, flounced gracefully after the stag, its sleek body gamboling over the other animal's back. The otter circled the stag playfully, winding around its neck and legs with amazing ease, before sprinting to the other side of the room.

Harry heard Hermione gasp aloud as his stag took off after the otter, joining it once more as the otter leaped to one side and then back again, teasing the stag with its quick movements. The silver forms continued their dance, courting each other's attentions like wayward lovers, until they reached the opposite wall and the open window. Carried on the light, cool breeze, the Patronuses were starting to lose their shape as the edges of their bodies became blurred, floating out the window into the night sky.

It was here that Harry noticed his hand at Hermione's waist, for she stepped out from underneath it and rushed over to the window. Awestruck, Harry followed until he was at her side once more.

Standing by the window, together they watched as the stag and otter floated across the open sky, their silver shapes uniting as one before fading amidst the few clouds hanging high overhead. In all but a moment, the shapes were gone, and nothing was left shining in the sky but stars.

Leading Hermione back to Gryffindor Tower under the invisibility cloak that night was difficult for Harry.

They had not stayed long in the Room of Requirement after they had watched their Patronuses fade into the night, nor had they talked about what they had seen since leaving their spots at the open window.

Harry didn't know what to think about the whole thing, if he was completely honest with himself. He had come up with various theories to explain away what he had witnessed, but he wasn't sure that made him feel any better about it. For example, he knew a Patronus was a wizard's ally, so it only made sense then that two Patronuses could work together toward a common goal, just as two people could do the same against whatever threat may be facing them.

He was trying to forget, however, that there had been no dementors to chase away in this case.

And the way his stag and Hermione's otter had interacted with other…

Was that a normal thing for two Patronuses to do?

Harry didn't know, for he had never seen more than one Patronus at a time. Yet, the playful way they had chased each other around the room, the manner in which they had seemed to be touching so intimately, was a vision Harry was certain would not soon fade from his mind, whether it had been a completely normal thing for them to do or not.

He wondered what Hermione thought of the whole scenario, but her face had been amazingly stoic since they had left the room behind them. Not even when he had glanced at her now and then, when he was certain he had heard a noise as they had been creeping back to the common room, did he detect a hint of what Hermione might be thinking on the matter.

At last, they reached the portrait of the Fat Lady and whispered the password. She grudgingly let them enter. Once safely inside, Harry was never more relieved to get out from underneath the invisibility cloak as he was then.

He was about to utter a very rapid good night to Hermione before making his sprint to the boys' staircase when Hermione suddenly touched his arm, making him jump in surprise. He looked at her and was astonished to see her smiling at him.

"Thank you, Harry," she said in a voice just above a whisper. "Thank you for staying tonight and helping me with my Patronus."

Any awkward thoughts Harry had been having since they had left the Room of Requirement vanished entirely.

He had helped her! And she had succeeded—succeeded in producing a real, full-blown, very powerful Patronus! Suddenly his chest swelled with pride.

Still smiling at him, Hermione stepped forward and placed a light kiss on his cheek. For a moment, his hand returned to her waist, but only for a moment…

"See you in the morning," she told him, her smile widening, and for a brief instant, Harry caught a glimpse of the playful otter in her eyes.

He knew everything would be back to normal in the morning, that their studying would increase dramatically for their O.W.L.s in the coming weeks, that his Occlumency lessons would intensify with Snape, that the next time they practiced their Patronuses in the Room of Requirement, dozens more people would be there practicing with them—but for this one brief moment, Harry could be glad he had spent the evening with his best friend. He could be glad he had shared something so extraordinary with her, he was certain he would never share it with anyone else. And in that thought at least, Harry could be content.

Watching the figure of Hermione reach the stairs to the girls' dormitory and disappear, Harry waited before walking across the common room to stare out the nearest window.

The sky had cleared a bit in the brief time since he had seen it last. Numerous stars were still shining above but blazing more brightly where clouds had concealed them not an hour earlier. Yet, beyond the stars, somewhere in the distance—where earth met sky—Harry was sure something brighter still lit up the heavens. And forever after he would swear he had seen two luminous figures—fearless stag and brave otter—lost amidst the haze of the horizon but found in each other.