It's OK, is the thing.
Kyle is OK.
He has a decent job and he takes out the trash (when reminded). And he got Stiles the tickets to the game for his birthday.
Not that Stiles really likes football. ("Lacrosse, Kyle. I played lacrosse in high school.") But it's the thought that counts. And, right, he watches it sometimes with his Dad. On Thanksgiving. So there's that. It's kind of thoughtful, really.
Of course, if he'd invited Dad it would have been even better. Especially as Kyle's yet to sit through lunch with him. But nobody's perfect.
It's fine.
"It's fine, Laura. Drop it."
Laura just gave him an unimpressed look.
"It is not fine, Der. You need to get out of your man cave. You've been in here for days."
"I have not!"
"Don't even front. I asked Boyd, and he says he hasn't even seen you for over a week. I'd ask how you're even alive, but I saw your little Leaning Tower of Pizza Boxes." Her lip curled a little, and that's fair, he should really take those out.
"Boyd's a traitor," he said, instead.
Laura rolled her eyes, like her eyeballs were doing their best to pull off a 360° Linda Blair impression.
"Boyd is the doorman, Derek, and it's part of his job."
"What? To spy on me?"
She huffs. "No. But it is his job to keep you and your neighbours safe - "
"From intruders! And clearly he's failing," he added, pointedly. Laura dismissed him with a wave of her hand.
"And he was concerned about you, and so was I -"
"Wait. You two talk about me? Remotely?"
"We're Facebook friends," she said, like it's nothing. Which it is, for some people.
"Come on, Derek. Look, I even got tickets to a suitably macho, manly event." She waved a pair of NFL tickets around, before delivering the killing blow. "It'll be just like old times."
Family, nostalgia. Like Hale kryptonite.
So that's how he found himself sitting next to Laura, crammed into a metal seat, surrounded on all sides by screaming people.
Laura yelled something at the referee, standing up to do it. She made an aborted move to climb onto her seat, like the added altitude would somehow carry her voice to him. Derek pulled her down before she could try it, and she subsided surprisingly good-naturedly, flinging an affectionate arm around his neck as she crashed back into her seat. She was happy, eyes bright and cheeks flushed, grinning wide.
"What did I tell you?" She yelled, over the roar of the crowd. "Just like old times!"
And he couldn't help smiling back and nodding, which was rewarded with a smacking kiss, delivered to the side of his head with more panache than finesse.
"Save it for the Kiss Cam!" Someone to Derek's right shouted. Laura flipped him off without looking, but a few people were already titterring. And that was why he doesn't get PDAs.
"Shut up, Kyle! Oh my god!" Derek's immediate neighbour hissed.
"Don't tell me to shut up!"
It devolved into a furtively furious low-voiced argument from there, which Derek mostly avoided hearing, thanks to the noise of the crowd, and ended when Kyle took a swig from his bottle and apparently forgot his boyfriend's existence. And they had to be dating, Derek definitely saw a possessive arm around not-Kyle's shoulders earlier. The boyfriend clenched his fists hard as Kyle stood up to shout something at a quarterback, then turned in his seat to catch Derek's eye before he could avert it.
Sorry, he mouthed.
Derek shrugged expansively, in a way he hoped conveyed, Not your fault.
Luckily, the guy seemed to have that rare aptitude for Derekese and quirked a smile. His eyes crinkled warmly when he smiled.
Emboldened, Derek inclined his head towards Kyle, who was shouting abuse, and raised an eyebrow. Shut-up-Kyle winced and shrugged defensively, correctly interpreting the Kyle is an asshole comment for what it was.
"This is bullshit. I'm getting another beer," Kyle announced, interrupting their silent conversation. Derek took a moment to be irrationally irritated, which turned into real annoyance when Kyle walked off without waiting for a response.
And that was just rude, not even asking if his boyfriend wanted anything.
Seriously, an asshole, his eyebrows told the guy. But this time Shut-up-Kyle hunched his shoulders and dropped his eyes to his phone.
Which stung. Derek was a little taken aback by how much.
Whatever.
He turned back to Laura, who was watching him avidly, looking gleeful. His phone buzzed a second later, and when he checked it there was a text from Laura waiting for him.
OMG CALL THE PRESIDENT START THE PARADE YOU WERE TALKING TO A BOY!
Ridiculous, he texted back.
YOU WERE!
We didn't speak, Laura.
YOU DID! WITH YOUR EYES
enough of the caps lock.
WHAT DO THE KIDS CALL IT THESE DAYS? RIGHT. EYE FUCKING
He gave her his best glower, the one that could make little kids cry, but, alas, familiarity and contempt. She just laughed merrily and went back to her phone.
YOU SHOULD GO FOR IT
He has a bf, Laura
OMG SLANG IM SO PROUD! BUT RLLY THE BFS A DICK GO FOR IT
Wouldn't that be immoral, though? He was still thinking about it when Kyle returned from the concessions stand, spilling beer on his boyfriend's lap when he sat down. He didn't seem to notice, but Shut-up-Kyle did the fist clenching thing again.
Laura nudged him and Derek grit his teeth.
The thing was, he could imagine it, suddenly. Being in Kyle's place, his arm around Shut-up-Kyle's shoulders. Except he'd be leaning back into him, as much as the seats permitted, not sitting rigid and stiff, and they'd whisper and giggle and share food and dear God - where are these ideas even coming from? He's never done anything like that, not even with Kate.
It would never happen.
And this guy had a boyfriend, who must make him happy, at least some of the time, or they wouldn't still be together.
Stop thinking about it, Derek.
By the time the whistle blew for half-time he had yet to succeed, but he was distracted by Laura suddenly jolting with excitement and grabbing his arm.
"Yes! Kiss cam! I wonder if we'll get any proposals today! Oh, maybe there'll be a break-up!" She was practically vibrating, a true romantic.
As the camera panned over the crowd, it seemed to hover over their section. Laura squeezed his hand hard.
"Oh my god," she breathed. "Derek! Remember what we talked about. If it stops on us, we have to hug it out and give them a show. Like I've just returned from the dead or something. I want tears, Derek."
When did they - Oh, right. In eighth grade.
Before he could say anything, the camera zoomed, and, for a second, he really thought it'd stop on them.
Instead it focused on Kyle and Shut-up-Kyle. Who froze, then grinned and waved at the camera, before turning to say something cajoling to his boyfriend.
Except Derek was sitting right next to them, so he got to watch himself look uncomfortable as he listened to his neighbour whisper: "Come on, Kyle. It's Kiss Cam! I've always wanted to be on Kiss Cam!"
Except Kyle was still an asshole.
He sneered and turned away, and Derek was still watching the screen, so he saw Shut-up-Kyle's face fall. People around them shifted uncomfortably and averted their eyes. A few giggled nervously.
Then Shut-up-Kyle was smiling again, leaning back in his seat, like he didn't care. His arm brushed Derek's and their eyes met.
Derek had no idea what his face was doing, but he hoped it was something sympathetic. Whatever it was, Shut-up-Kyle must have seen something he liked, because he tilted his head, shrugged and raised an eyebrow. Derek felt his respond, and Shut-up-Kyle grinned, and it was like he was challenging him, or something, and then there was an eyebrow wiggle and he was leaning forward slightly and OH RIGHT.
Shut-up-Kyle's lips were soft and slightly wet, like he'd licked them recently. The thought made something clench hot and sudden in Derek's stomach.
Then Shut-up-Kyle was gone and sitting back in his seat, grinning like the cat who got the cream. And Derek's brain buzzed for a solid five seconds before rebooting.
People were laughing - a woman in the the row in front was practically in hysterics - a few were clapping, he could hear catcalling, Laura was pounding him on the back and someone nearby was shouting.
"I can't believe you, Stiles!"
Kyle was standing, wedged in the tiny gap between seats and standing over Shut-up - Stiles - looking furious.
"You slut!"
Stiles (Stiles!) looked affronted. "Are you seriously trying to slut-shame me right now? Are you kidding? Dude, that was chaste. Seriously, I could have been kissing my grandmother."
Laura snorted loudly in his ear, and Derek wanted to feel offended, but Kyle was already speaking again.
"You can't just kiss random guys!"
"Says who? You don't own me. And he's not random! For all you know, Eyebrows here could be one of my dearest friends."
Eyebrows?
"He is not!"
"How would you know?" And there was an edge of steel in Stiles' voice. "It's not like you've taken the time to actually meet any of them."
A few people ooohhhed quietly.
Kyle looked uncomfortable, then rallied. "Still, you can't do that. I'm your boyfriend, you're embarrassing me." He looked around for support, but everyone in the vicinity avoided his eye. Stiles actually laughed.
"You're kidding. If anyone's embarrassing anyone, it's you. You were being a dick, and now you're making a scene." He gestured to all the people watching, then at the screen, which, yup, was still trained on them, drinking in the drama.
"Have you been cheating on me?" Kyle demanded, out of nowhere. "With this guy. Is that what this is?"
Stiles snorted. "Please. If I could get with a guy like that, do you think I'd still be with you?"
Head explosion, Derek reflected, might be imminent.
"What?"
Laura chose that moment to lean forward over Derek's lap. "Can I just point out, Stiles - May I call you Stiles? Well, can I just remind you that you already did."
Stiles flushed and glanced at Derek speculatively. Laura grinned at him, thrusting a piece of paper into his hand, and Derek got a glimpse of a series of numbers that looked suspiciously like his phone number. She nodded at Derek while making the Call Me gesture.
"Laura!"
But Stiles pocketed it, looking thoughtful, then turned to his boyfriend.
"Kyle, I think we need to talk. Maybe we can go somewhere more private?"
"No! I payed good money for these seats and I'm not leaving. You wanna say something, you can say it right now."
"Fine. I think we should break up."
The collective ooohhhh was much louder this time. A few flashes went off, aimed at Kyle's gobsmacked face.
"What? You can't just. On TV. What?"
"Seriously. We shouldn't have this conversation here."
He stood up, and somehow shimmied past Kyle with unexpected agility, then headed downstairs, towards an exit with a mesmerising long-legged stride, Kyle trailing in his wake, like a lost duckling.
"Nice view," Laura commented, and Derek rounded on her.
"What the hell were you doing?"
"I'm your wingwoman! I was helping you out!"
"By giving a stranger my number?"
"You were into him! And come on, Derek, that's how it works. You meet new people. You hang out. You stop being strangers. Friends you don't yet know, y'know? And luckily someone gave him your number, so you might actually see him again some day. You're welcome."
Surprisingly, Stiles reappeared just before the game kicked off again.
Sorry, he mouthed, as he collapsed back into his seat. His phone rang a second later.
"Yo, Scotty!" He said cheerfully as he answered it. "What, you saw that?... I guess... Crap... Yeah, we just broke up - Wait, what do you mean good?... Scott! You're supposed to be my best friend! You should have said something! - Well, whatever, it's over... Oh course, I'm still here, the tickets were my birthday present, you think I'd leave?... Of course, I know they were for Kyle, I made him leave. Well, he kind of just left on his own. I think. Unless he's lurking somewhere... Nah, I'm fine, I'm not alone... Dude, it's a stadium full of people... Yeah... You know what, no, I'll talk to you later. Bye!"
He hung up and turned immediately to Derek.
"So, hey, uh, brother of Laura. Friend of Laura? I didn't get the boyfriend vibe? Unless you guys are into threesomes, in which case, I gotta tell you -"
"No!" Derek interjected, and Stiles grinned.
"He speaks! Anyway, brother of Laura? Cool. Thanks for back there, it was really decent of you, helping me out like that."
"I actually thought I made it worse," he admitted.
"Nah, Dude. That wasn't on you. Or me. And, you know, Kiss Cam! Gotta give 'em a show!"
"Exactly!" Laura chimed in, looking far too approving. It was a little terrifying.
"So, uh, if you wanted to do it again some time...? I mean, we could get coffee?"
"Yes!" Derek replied, a little too quickly. He'd be embarrassed, but it was worth it for the wide, relieved grin.
"Awesome!"
And then they're staring at each other awkwardly. They both looked away.
Laura drummed her nails on the armrest, which graduated into nudging Derek in the ribs with increasing frequency. He glowered at her, in a Yes, I know, I don't know what to say way.
Shegestured, Say anything!
"So, this is kind of like a first date," he blurted out.
Oh. God.
Coming on too strong. Though, who's he kidding? They just starred in a Kiss Cam video together.
Luckily, Stiles laughed. "Dude, you're right. I totally didn't think of that. But start as you mean to go on, right?"
"Unexpected and full of public drama?"
"Hell, yeah! No one expects the Stilinski Inquisition! Or, you know, experience. Oh, I'm Stiles, by the way."
Derek nodded and instigated a weirdly businesslike handshake before he could stop himself.
"I'm Derek."
Stiles smiled, making his eyes crinkle again, and Derek's heart lurch briefly into doublespeed, like an exercising hamster getting a burst of motivation.
Laura snorted, but, for once, ignoring her was effortless.
"So. Derek," Stiles said, suddenly serious. "Now that we're movie stars, I've gotta know your stance on PDA."
Dismal.
But with Stiles struggling to maintain his serious face, he couldn't help smirking, then watching it break down completely.
"Do you, now?"
"Yes. I mean, the Kiss Cam was a decent preview, but, dude, we've gotta work on it if we're ever going to be ready for Oscar night."
"Of course."
"First base, at least."
"What, no touchdown?"
Stiles gasped in false outrage, and beside him Laura choked.
"On a first date? Sir! What kind of boy do you take me for?"
"Of course. Third date. How could I forget?"
Stiles cackled, like a dime store halloween decoration.
But they did get in a lot of practice. Though not much football.
Derek was OK with that.