Part I: The before

November 2017

Josh took a drink from his beer as he sighed and changed the channel. The world truly wasn't what it used to be, he thought to himself. Certainly he wasn't what he used to be either. In a different time, nothing could get him fired up like watching CNN, but now it just made him…numb.

Unable to settle on anything, he turned off the TV and leaned his head back in his armchair. Only 9pm and he was already thinking about heading to bed. The old Josh would still be at the office now. The old Josh used to spend the entire night in his office sometimes. He really wasn't sure what happened to that guy.

"Hey, I thought I heard you in here."

Josh didn't open his eyes, but spun around in the chair so that he was facing his wife.

"Is it morning yet?" he groaned, before he couldn't resist opening one eye just to see her roll her eyes and smile at him, the way she always has. One thing that hasn't changed—and Josh is thankful for it every day—is the love he feels for Donna, and the love she gives him in return. They had been officially together for more than ten years now, and still every moment with her was like he was falling in love with her all over again. Some days that was the only thing that got him out of bed.

"If you want to go to bed, go to bed," she made her way across the room to perch against the arm of his chair. Josh immediately pulled her into his lap and nuzzled into her neck. "Josh," she whined. "I have work to do. Go on upstairs, I'll be up in an hour or so."

Josh sighed but let her go, and she pulled him to his feet after her. He leaned down to kiss her, whispering a soft "goodnight" against her lips. She gently brushed a hand down the side of his face as he did so, before turning towards the room they used as their combined office, but Josh truthfully hadn't used in over two years.

He trudged upstairs after making sure the front door was locked—Donna would surly check before she went to bed too, but Josh liked to pretend that he was taking care of his family—turning off some of the downstairs lights as he went. At the top of the stairs, he peeked into the first bedroom like he did every night to make sure the twins were still sleeping, but kept their door open so that the night light in the bathroom was visible.

He stopped for a moment to just look at them, his babies. His professional life used to be all he had, but ever since the election his professional life was virtually nonexistent. He had tried, tried to stick with it; he'd worked as a consultant for a while, even after leaving DC, but as time passed, Josh had found his heart to be less and less in it until he just stopped altogether, no longer returning calls and rejecting appearances to speak about the line of work that used to fulfil him like nothing else.

This, though. This was something else entirely. Being a father wasn't something he had ever prepared for, because he never saw it coming. His work had truly been his life for the better part of twenty years, and he saw no reason for that to change until suddenly it did. When they found out Donna was pregnant everything really fell into place for him. Staying home and being a full-time parent just made sense, especially with Donna becoming one of the most sought-after professionals in Washington. It gave her the opportunity to continue to advance her career while giving him the escape he was craving.

Being a father completed him. He didn't know what true happiness felt like until the doctor handed him his daughter for the first time and he looked up to see Donna holding their son. He threw himself wholeheartedly into parenthood, waking up in the middle of the night for feedings and diaper changes and lullabies, and even once the twins had started sleeping through the night, Josh still found himself waking up to check on them every few hours. Even now that they're six years old, Josh still sometimes comes in to just watch them sleep when he himself has trouble quieting his mind. It's the place where he's happiest. His family is truly the best part of him.

After watching them a moment longer, Josh slipped back across the hallway into his and Donna's bedroom. The only light came from a lamp on Donna's side of the bed, but Josh didn't bother turning on anything else. He pulled off his sweatshirt—there was no use in dressing up when the most he left the house for was to drive the twins to school and go to the store—and jeans and grabbed a pair of flannel pants to wear to bed. He kept the lamp on as he slid into bed, leaving it for Donna whenever she came upstairs. He realized that this was a complete one-eighty from their first four years as a couple, when he was White House Chief of Staff and his duties sometimes kept him at work until after midnight, and even on the lightest days he'd stay up reading briefing memos until long after Donna had gone to bed.

It wasn't his favorite thing ever, but he had gotten used to going to bed alone. At least he still woke up early with her, his body long accustomed to waking up with the sun. Those moments early in the day, where they could lie in bed next to each other quietly, just sharing a space, were some of Josh's favorites. That was their time, where nothing and no one existed outside of the two of them. It grounded him, and gave him the strength he needed to get through the weeks when she was in DC and he was here with the kids.

Although he had done almost nothing all day, as soon as the covers were pulled up around him Josh felt himself being pulled into sleep. Exhaustion had seemed to follow him even into retirement, and ironically Josh just didn't have the energy lately to figure out why that was. After all, this was his life now, and he had another day to get ready for.

A/N: Hello, 'tis I. For anyone hoping I was updating NTWWPI, I sincerely apologize. I do fully intend to finish that story at some point, but I don't know what that point will be. In the meantime, my TWW brain has gone crazy with all sorts of post-series ideas, and I just needed to get them out. I have very little plan in terms of how this story is going to go, I'm just going to write and see what happens. Feedback is greatly appreciated (it also makes me update faster)...this is an intro of sorts, and this story has the potential to become a whole monster of a series if I stay properly motivated! If anyone wants to help this happen, please PM me...I could use a sounding board to help me develop ideas as I go!