Chapter 1
Rating: Pg-13 (may increase, depending on whether I give into Sirius/Remus shaped temptation ;-D)
Summary: "It's hard being attractive and popular. No, really, it is." Sirius' friends will deal with his flamboyant bisexuality, he knows that, but how will a certain person cope with his biggest secret, if he gets round to telling, that is. Sirius/Remus, told through Sirius' journal. WIP.
Disclaimer: the characters belong to JK Rowling, the lust is all my own.
A/N: My first attempt to write something long, so we'll see how it goes...
Haha! Well I told them all that I'm bisexual, a swinging nutter! And they pretty much reacted how I had expected - well, mainly. James laughed, and proceeded to think of as many derogatory gay names as possible (fudgepacker was his favourite, I recall.) Lily claimed she already knew and scolded James for his teasing. Peter merely looked rather terrified, as he always does. Remus, though, well he looked more interested than I would have thought, or perhaps that was just my imagination.
This all kicked off really when Remus came back this September. I'd guessed before then that women weren't really, well, enough for me, of course, but that warm September morning in King's Cross completely opened my eyes. Remus' parents had taken him on holiday that summer and he'd gotten a tan that took away that pasty quality his face used to have. He glowed, literally, and the moment he stepped onto the platform every pair of eyes fell upon him. I felt as if I should have said something, but there was no need; we all knew - he knew - that the Remus Lupin who had left us, weak and bashful, at the end of our fourth year was not the same Remus Lupin who greeted us on that humid late summer morn. He had grown - into himself, if that makes any sense. He was comfortable in his own skin, and it was plain to see, to everyone from Severus Snape up.
That grated me something rotten, that it took me as long to see the beautiful, brave - confident? - person Remus is, as some twit like Snape. Well, anyway, it was then I knew. When Remus called out, "Siri," and the crowds parted as he ran towards me, the golden hair he'd allowed to grow out slightly sweeping over his face, and he dropped his cases to hug me and I had to *think* to make myself breathe.
My! If I didn't know myself so well, I'd say it was love. It's just lust though, I'm sure, mixed with friendly affection. Even if it did help open my eyes.
And I may be able to tell them about the whole boys-and-girls thing, but there's no way I'm ready to tell them this. You know, it's hard being attractive and popular. No, really, it is. You see, it's the high and mighty who fall the hardest.
A/N: Eeek, I know, I know. Please give me some constructive criticism, if you can.