AN: You can thank my friend for telling this to me: "Write some Oliver angst. Barry and Kara don't deserve any more of your sadistic tendencies."
Also, I usually post on the Flash/Supergirl side of this website, but I realized stories that are Oliver-centric deserve to be in the Arrow fandom, so stories that are more Oliver-centric will now be under the Arrow/Supergirl tab.
It just sucks you can only crossover two fandoms on here.
Thea walks through the threshold of her brother's loft, heels clicking loudly and precisely against the marble floor, just enough to demand attention and authority from anyone within hearing distance. Her arms swing — not gently, not gracefully — by her sides, rocking with just a bit more force than normal to let it bleed through that she's irritated, maybe even pissed. There's a glint within those green irises: it's grim and angry and perhaps there's still tears in those slightly reddened eyes.
In the living room, she finds the TV on and the sight of some stupid show playing pushes her fury a bit further up her already growing meter. She swipes at the remote and jams the off button.
"Oliver!" She yells, almost growling, as she looks up towards his room. She can't bring herself to call him by his nickname, not when she's just... so... mad.
After a few seconds tick by, ample time for a response, there's no reply.
This makes her blood boil, and her eyes water as a result from it.
"I swear to God, Oliver!" She shouts, louder, walking towards his room that used to cater for three. "I know this is hard for you but Jesus Christ can you not be selfish just for today? John, William and I have been waiting..."
Whatever else she's supposed to say in the heat of her anger, it ends up lost somewhere within the crevice of her conscience. Having thrown the door open, she had honestly expected her brother to be in some sort of a drunken stupor as a result from a shameful wallowing or be passed out from said wallowing. What she hadn't anticipated is her brother on the ground in front of the mirror, crying in his crumpled suit as he's tying his tie.
Or at least trying to.
"Ollie?" She says, in a tone that's much more soft compared to her previous holler, gentle eyes meeting his own that are clouded with too much despair.
"I..." He breathes deep to avoid stuttering. "I can't tie this thing."
The mess of words she's about to tell him in some bullshit effort to comfort him evaporates because... well, what is she supposed to say?
This is a man she's grown to know as someone who is steadfast in his rock solid ability to make it seem like he's indifferent to everything, good or bad. He's always the one there for her. Now the roles have been flipped.
She stands there motionless, probably looking so stupid with her mouth open in dumb shock.
He doesn't look at her... he can't look at her, keeping his eyes downcast as he breathes, breathes, breathes to keep himself steady, grounded. She knows what that's like to a certain degree.
After all, she's lost people too but Oliver... Oliver's lost too much.
Her grief is as devastating as she sees it but she knows it is minuscule compared to Oliver's, having lost the two people he's put above everything and everyone else he cares about, with Barry and Kara being on a pedestal with her and his son because that's what family means to Oliver.
"My... M-My hands," he says as a sort of explanation, leaving the satin hang loosely from his neck to show her his hands that are trembling, an odd thing to occur to a masterful archer and marksman, and an even more disconcerting feat when she realizes this is Oliver, a man that almost never lets anything faze him.
And just like that, her anger leaves her system with sympathy raining down on her.
She's been seeing it all so differently: initially thinking of Oliver as selfish when, in reality, it's him that's obviously going to feel the most pain; loss leaves a cut deep within anyone, and who's lost more people than him?
She's grieving, too.
Barry was exactly the kind of brother she wanted Oliver to be when she was younger and Kara was the sister she never had but almost did. Together, they were both exactly the kind of people she wanted for her brother, exactly the kind of people her brother needed: good, loyal and extremely loving, always putting him first when he himself doesn't, saving him from his self-destructive tendencies.
They let William, her beautiful nephew, integrate into their lives so easily, so seamlessly, that their little makeshift family just made sense.
Barry and Kara loved William like he was their own.
And now the poor little boy has lost his second mother and other father...
She'll cry for her nephew, mourn over the horrific trauma he's going to have to live through again because some higher being doesn't want him happy.
She inches forward and settles on the floor right in front of him, letting her elegant black dress drape the space around her and cover her legs as she tucks them beneath her. She wordlessly takes the tie and decides to do a simple knot, all the while avoiding his tired piercing gaze that quietly begs for release from the agony. When she's done, she's reluctant to let go because then it would mean they have to go back to reality, to the stabbing pain of the truth.
"Thanks, Thea." He smiles, as if he's not absolutely falling apart and says, "Let's go. Can't be late to my own spouses' funeral, right?" He says, attempting at a joking kind of manner but it falls flat by the way his voice quivers and eyes swim in tears. He clears his throat. "We have to be strong. For William. For Joe, Iris, Wally, Alex, Eliza... Today is..." One shaky breath, he takes it deep to steady himself. "Today is gonna be hard for them."
He's saying it to convince himself, she knows.
He will be or at least pretend to be strong, she knows.
In her case, she will be strong, but only for her brother, whose false exterior of 'fine' will eventually wear out and she will make sure to be there for him when that happens because today...
Today is gonna be hard for him too especially.
By the end of it all and the rain decides not to come, everyone's presence slowly dwindles until it's just Oliver left, wedged between Barry's and Kara's gravestones with a phone in his hand, outstretched in front of him as if there's two other viewers sitting on either side of him.
She lurks quietly behind him, unbeknownst to him that she had left behind too to keep an eye on him.
She squints and is able to take a peak at the small screen.
"Kara, you'll love this part. Barry does."
He's watching Kara and Barry's favorite show.
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He yells, then stumbles, then falls, then curls himself into a ball.
Right between Kara and Barry, where he once belonged.
"I miss them. So much."
She doesn't respond; she does what he's always done for her whenever she feels close to the edge of giving up: she's there for him.
Shameless self-promotion: come say hi/follow me on tumblr at temmie-loony. I post WAY TOO MUCH Karivarry stuff on there that I can't really put into fics.
AN: Thank you and I'm sorry.
To Debbie: bruh, you right they dont deserve any more of my shit so i killed em
*cue me developing horns and a tail