- This is (obviously) a work of fanfiction. I don't own anything but the original characters. I don't claim ownership over the characters or storyline of the TV show Supernatural, no matter how grateful I am for them, which is hella.

- No posting schedule, because I am a garbage person comprised of garbage, and cannot commit to anything but my husband.

- Thanks to the Sister Husbands, who are my best friends in the whole world, and happen to be gracious enough to also beta most of my works for me. I don't know what I'd do without you girls, but I certainly wouldn't be doing this.

- I come by any mistakes here honestly, but feel free to point them out so I can correct them.

- Chapter lengths will vary, because the pacing of the story is important to me for no good reason that I can put my finger on. So. This one is short, the next one will (probably) be much longer.

- I recently went through a Cain/Dean Winchester reading phase (read: binge), and I was thinking about how much I like their dynamic in a lot of the fics I've read, and then I was thinking that I definitely don't need another WIP, and then this happened. I hope you guys like it as much as I plan to.

When his phone rings for the fourth time in twenty minutes, Dean finally picks up. He doesn't have to look at the screen (which is a good thing, since he's driving) to know who's calling.

"Cut it out, Sam."

There's a beat of silence when he realizes with a sort of petty gratification that Sam didn't actually expect him to pick up, then, "Dean! Wait, don't hang up. I'm just trying to-"

"I know what you're trying to do, and I'm not coming back."

"Just tell me where you are!"

"No."

"Why not?" his brother demands.

Dean huffs. "Because you're just gonna try to track me down and make me come back."

"I would not!"

Dean's skeptical silence must be answer enough for Sam, because he just keeps talking.

"Is this because of Ketch?"

Dean scowls at the name. "No."

"Then what?"

"Sam, I'm not doing this with you right now."

"Then when? Jesus, Dean, Dad's funeral was yesterday, and I wake up and you're gone? What kind of shit is that?"

"Them's the breaks, kid."

"Dean."

Dean heaves a sigh. "I just can't be there, Sam. I can't do it anymore. And I don't have to, not now that you're taking over as Alpha."

"You can't do what anymore? I know that you took over a lot of responsibility while I was at school and Dad got sick, I do, and I appreciate it. We all appreciate it. But that doesn't mean you can just bail now!"

"Why not?" Dean snaps. "What the hell do you need me for now?"

"Because you're my brother! And I don't know how to do this stuff! And, fuck, there are a million ways to get pups these days, you don't have to-"

Dean hangs up. He doesn't want to hear any more.

He tosses his phone into the passenger seat and seethes as he drives.

The thing is, Sam's sort of right. Dean did take on a lot of responsibility when John Winchester, Alpha of the Winchester pack, fell sick. Sam was still in school, still passing as a human so he could get an education that would help the pack when he got back to the small town they all live in. Dean didn't want that to be interrupted, so he insisted that Sam stay where he was and Dean just… Took care of things.

He settled disputes and blessed matings and stood over pups being birthed, all in his sick father's name. He had his share of fights about it, too. The inner circle of the pack, John's Council of Elders, none of them have ever cared that he's an omega, but the rest of them had to be taught a thing or two. Omega or not, he's still the Alpha's son, and he demands the same respect, and if he doesn't get it automatically, he'll earn it with claws and teeth.

Not anymore, though, he thinks. His shoulders relax noticeably at the thought. Not any-fucking-more.

Sam doesn't understand, but that's a good thing. The shit Sam does now for the pack, the shit that he will do, it'll all come easily to him. Sam's a people person, he always has been. He likes interacting with the pack, he's a good decision maker and a natural leader. Sam's an alpha, through and through. He does know how to do everything Dean's been doing. He watched Dean do it for weeks before John took his final turn for the worse. He's just trying to manipulate Dean into coming back.

How dare he mention pups? a tiny voice in his head, the one that sometimes lets him be mad at the brother he took care of for so long, whispers. How dare he?

It doesn't matter. I'm gone, and I'm not going back.

It's not that Dean doesn't love his pack. He loves them with a fierce intensity. It's just the noise. Not just audible, obvious noise, but it's the constant company, the never having any privacy, the always having someone who needs something. It's so much. Dean was able to pull it together and do it while John was sick and Sam was gone, but now that Sam's back and about to take over permanently as Alpha, all he can think about how much space he wants to put between him and them.

All he can think about is how much he wants it to be quiet.

His phone buzzes with another incoming phone call. Instead of answering, he declines it and hits the speed dial, holding the phone up to his ear.

"Hello, Dean."

"Sam won't leave me alone." He knows he's whining, but he lets it happen. Cas has heard it all before.

"Hmm, that's what happens when we run away from our problems, isn't it?" Cas says serenely. Dean hears the hurt beneath the words, though, and closes his eyes as guilt washes over him.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was going. It wasn't… I wasn't planning it."

A heavy sigh crackles through the line. "I know you weren't. You left your Metallica shirt here."

"Did I… Shit!"

Cas' low rumble of a laugh is enough to let Dean know he's been forgiven. "Don't worry, I hid it before Sam got here. When you get settled, I can send it to you. Or a post office box would suffice, if you don't want to give me an address." From anyone else, the words would be a jab. From Cas, they're just him being considerate.

Castiel Novak has been Dean's best friend since they were pups, barely toddling around in diapers. Cas is an artist, and he thinks and talks like it. He's a weirdo to the max, but Dean loves him. Dean probably could have even been in love with him, too, once upon a time. He doesn't give a fuck that Cas is a beta and they would have difficulty conceiving a pup (and isn't that a laugh now), but Cas is aromantic and asexual. As it is, Dean's awkward teenage feelings toppled over into a deep, strong friendship instead of romance, and he wouldn't trade it, or Cas, for anything.

"Fuck that. Once I stop, you'll come visit."

"Oh? I get the honor of visiting the great Dean Winchester, vagabond and runaway?" The awe in Cas' voice sounds almost sincere. The prick.

"Oh, fuck you."

"You wish."

"Come get it, sweetheart. You know I'm up for a chase."

"... Dean, that's disgusting."

Dean laughs out loud, feeling lighter than he has in the two years since John's dire diagnosis. "Fuck, man. I miss you already."

"No, you don't."

Dean thinks about it, and it's true. He doesn't miss Cas, not quite yet. He will soon, he knows. He's never really been without his best friend for long. Cas is the only person he can stand to be around for very long without feeling drained and depressed afterward.

"I will, though."

"I know. Do you know where you're going?"

Dean grins. "Somewhere quiet."

He pushes the pedal down to the floor and listens to Baby purr beneath him.