Loki, Where's My Snickers?

a Getting Away With Mischief Lost Tale

(story takes place in the chapter Thundering Twos of Capes, Cups and Glittery Things)

It was a fine sunny day and Loki decided it was perfect to go and take his pint-sized brother and his two mischief makers over to Central Park to play. Aleta and Max loved going to the park and feeding the ducks in the pond, playing tag around the benches and trees and petting people's dogs as they walked along the paths. Loki enjoyed going there because it gave him a chance to be outside and let his kids run around while he relaxed on a bench and read the paper or just watched everyone going by. He thought Thor would like it too, since the rambunctious little god enjoyed being able to run all over like a dervish.

"Come on, kids! Let's go to the park!" Loki called upstairs, where Aleta was playing house with her brother and uncle.

"Okay, Daddy" Aleta answered. "C'mon, Max and Thor! We're gonna go to the park!"

She ran down the stairs, followed moments later by Max, who was untying an old tie of Loki's from around his neck.

"Where's my brother?" Loki asked.

"He's coming," answered his small son.

Loki looked up the stairs and then his jaw dropped.

There was his brother, walking slowly down the stairs in Aleta's pink nightgown wearing a baby bonnet over his long blonde curls.

"By the Nine! Thor, what are you doing in that?!"

"Playing house," replied the baby Thunderer.

"He's the baby, so we dressed him up," explained his three-year-old daughter.

Loki doubled over laughing. "Oh . . . oh dear sweet Valhalla!" He could just imagine the horror on his brother's face if he ever saw what he had on. "Max . . . where's my phone?"

Max ran and got Loki's green iPhone Plus. "Here, Daddy."

Loki snapped several pictures of 'baby Thor' and then tucked the phone in his pocket, still giggling. "Okay, let's get changed before you go to the park."

He removed the nightgown and baby bonnet and dressed his brother in his jeans and dinosaur shirt, brushing his flyaway hair and pulling it back in a tail.

Then he examined his other two kids, and seeing they were presentable, said, "Now we're ready to go to the park."

Five minutes later they were all walking down the street, Aleta holding Loki's hand and Max holding Aleta's. Loki carried Thor, not trusting the toddler to stay next to him. Thor had a habit of darting away when he saw something he wanted.

They reached the park and Loki set Thor down and told the kids to go play on the swings or the jungle gym.

The three toddlers raced away as if freed from juvie, giggling and screaming.

Look out, here come the Troublemakers Three!

Loki took a seat on a bench not far from where the children were playing on the slide and the jungle gym so he could watch them while he sipped coffee from his travel mug and read the paper he had just bought from a vending machine.

He was just reading about the hurricane that had slammed Puerto Rico when Aleta ran up to him. "Daddy, Thor won't let this other little kid on the slide."

Loki set the paper down and rose. His brother often had issues with sharing, despite their attempts to teach him to play nicely with others.

Thor was glaring at another small boy of about two, who wanted to climb up the slide. "Mine!"

"No, my turn!" cried the other boy.

"You gotta share," Max tried to keep the peace.

But the other two were having none of it and were glaring at each other like they were going to start World War III.

"Hey," Loki said as he strode over to the arguing toddlers. "Thor, let this little boy have a turn now. You already have been down the slide twice."

"But Loki!" Thor pouted, his lower lip sticking out adorably.

Loki frowned. "No 'but Loki,' Thor Odinson. You have to take turns. Like you do at home."

Little Thor crossed his arms over his chest. "Don' wanna!"

"Thor," Loki warned, his hands on his hips. "Do you want a time out?"

Thor sniffled. "No!" he whined.

"Then play nice and take turns."

He gave his brother one of his famous Disappointed Looks.

"Okay!" Thor pouted, stamping his foot. "Loki mean!"

Loki rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I'm always mean when you don't get your way. Now go play on the swings."

Thor stormed off, still sulky.

The other boy happily climbed up the slide and Loki returned to his paper, crisis averted for now.

Thirty minutes later, all three kids came running over to him. "What's up, Doc?" Loki said in Bugs Bunny's voice.

Aleta giggled. "Daddy, you're silly!"

Loki tweaked her nose. "You going to answer my question?"

"We're hungry!" Max told him.

"Hungry, Loki!" Thor echoed.

Loki checked his watch and saw it was past noon. "Okay, why don't we get some lunch? I saw a hot dog cart just over there."

"Yes! I love hot dogs!" Aleta cheered.

"Me too!" Thor agreed, clapping.

"Okay, imps. Let's get some Sabretts."

He brought them out of the park and across the street where a hot dog vendor had set up a cart. "Stay by me," he ordered his brood while he ordered two plain hot dogs, two with mustard and relish and two with onions n'sauce. The onions n'sauce ones were for him, the others were for the children. He also ordered chips and a large coffee and three small water bottles.

Max tugged on Loki's jacket. "Daddy, can we go by that vending machine?"

Loki looked where his son was pointing. It was literally two feet away next to a convenience store. "All right. But you stay there and do not move, understand?"

"Yes, Dad. We know about stranger danger," Max recited.

The stranger would be in danger if they ever tried to take you away, Loki thought and handed his son three dollar bills. "Here. You can each get a candy bar."

"Thanks, Dad!"

He grabbed Aleta and Thor's hands and they raced over to the candy machine, which showed Hersheys, Snickers, Nestle's Crunch, Almond Joy, and other assorted candy.

Loki turned back to the vendor and took the water bottles and tucked them in his backpack. He poured the coffee in his travel mug after fixing it and stuck it on the side of the backpack, leaving his hands free to take the hot dogs when they were ready. He shoved napkins and the chips into the pockets of his jacket.

The vendor laughed. "Man, you got it down to a science!"

"With three toddlers? Yes, I have to," Loki agreed.

"They all yours?" the vendor whistled as he wrapped up a hot dog.

"One is my little brother," Loki explained. "The other two are mine."

The vendor whistled. "You are one brave man!"

Loki shrugged. The hot dogs were almost all wrapped up when Max raced over to Loki. "Dad, we have a situation!"

Loki looked at his small son. "Max, what situation?"

"Thor is flipping out over the vending machine with the candy."

Loki groaned. "Define flipping out."

Just then a hair raising shriek came from the vending machine next to the convenience store. "I WANT MY SNICKERS!"

Loki face-palmed himself. Nine Hells, Thor!

"Daddy, you better hurry! He's tryin' to bust it open!" Aleta yelled.

Loki hurriedly shoved some cash at the hot dog man. "Here. Keep the change!"

The vendor gaped at him. "You sure, man?"

"Yes." Loki grabbed the hot dogs. "Now if you'll excuse me, my little brother is about to have a meltdown."

Loki ran across the sidewalk, leaving the vendor smiling and counting the change from a hundred dollar bill, to where Thor was screaming and pounding on the vending machine, his face beet red from sobbing. The vending machine was shaking from the mini god's tantrum.

"Thor! Stop it! Holy hells, you know better than to behave like this!"

"LOKI, WHERE'S MY SNICKERS?!" bawled the irate little Thunder God.

Loki bit back the first smartass comment that came into his head. If it were up your butt you'd know.

"You can't get candy unless you put money in the machine," he remonstrated, thinking that was the problem.

"Daddy, we did," Aleta told him. "We put in a dollar and the Snickers won't come out."

"Okay. Thor, quit beating the machine up," Loki ordered. "I can get your Snickers. Max, hold two of these hot dogs."

He gave two of the Sabretts to Max.

Then he flicked his finger against the machine, using magic to get the stuck candy bar to fall into the receptacle. "Got it!" he reached into the machine and took the candy out.

Meanwhile, his obstreperous little brother continued to howl like a dog being tortured by fireworks.

Several passersby stared at the little boy and shook their heads, some in sympathy, others in disapproval.

"What a brat!" one elderly lady said to her friend.

"Kid needs a good spanking," the other woman retorted. "Parents these days don't know how to discipline."

"I agree. My Johnny would have never behaved that way," sniffed the first woman.

Loki clenched his jaw. Yeah, right, you old busybody! I bet your Johnny ended up in jail for robbing banks thanks to your discipline!

"Thor, you better stop having a fit or else you're gonna be in trouble," warned Aleta in her doomsayer voice.

"Yup," Max added. "You are going to be in time out forever!"

Thor gulped sharply and Loki wasn't sure if he was trying to stop crying or going to start screaming again.

"Thor, buddy, look," he said, showing the toddler the candy.

"Humph!" snorted the elderly lady, scowling at Loki. "Young man, if you want my advice, that child needs a good smack, not candy!"

Thor whimpered and hid behind Loki.

Loki turned his head, gritting his teeth. "I beg your pardon? I don't recall asking for your advice, ma'am."

"Well, you look like you need it, young man!" the old woman began.

"Thank you, but I can handle this." Loki said softly, with a glint in his emerald eyes.

"Kids these days lack discipline!" her friend put in. "A good paddling would—"

Loki set his jaw. "I beg to differ. All toddlers have tantrums when they are overtired. Or hungry. Now, please excuse me . . ." He turned back to find Thor clinging to his leg, his cerulean eyes bright with tears.

"No time out, Loki!"

"Next time don't beat up a vending machine, little brother, and you won't need to worry about it," Loki scolded. He pulled some napkins from his jacket and wiped Thor's face.

"Want Snickers, Loki!" his brother whined.

"Only if you behave," Loki told him. He looked at his other two children. "Did you get your candy?"

"Yeah. I got M &M's," Max said, showing him.

"And I got Nestle's Crunch!" Aleta told him.

"Okay. Then let's go sit down and eat our lunch before it gets cold." Loki picked up Thor and walked back over to the bench near the duck pond. He spread the newspaper out on the bench and put the hot dogs on it along with the bags of chips and the drinks.

Aleta and Max started eating their plain hot dogs eagerly, and crunching the chips. "Mmm! I love these!" Max said happily.

"So do I!" Aleta agreed.

But Thor stared at his hot dogs mutinously. "Want Snickers, Loki!"

Loki rolled his eyes. Clearly it was going to be one of those days. "Thor, no candy until you eat your lunch. Come on, I know you like hot dogs." Loki encouraged him by biting into one of his own hot dogs.

Thor pouted. "Loki, want Snickers!"

Little brother, you are determined to drive me to drink! Loki sighed. "What did I say, young man?" He ate some more of his hot dog. "Mmm! It's really good."

But Thor was in one of his stubborn goat moods. "Want Snickers!" He went to shove the hot dogs on the ground.

Loki caught his wrist. "No you don't! If you don't eat your lunch you don't get dessert. And you don't throw food."

Thor stamped his foot on the ground. There was a slight rumble of thunder.

Loki's eyes narrowed. "Stop it, Thor!"

"Want Snickers, Loki!"

Yeah and I want a vacation, Loki thought. "Thor, you stop being a contrary goat, and just eat your hot dogs."

"Daddy, can I have another hot dog?" asked Max.

"Sure. Why don't you eat one of Thor's since he doesn't want it?" Loki said. He reached over to give one of the hot dogs to Max.

"No! Mine!" Thor shouted, grabbing both hot dogs and held them to his chest.

"Then eat them."

Thor nodded as he started eating and Max smiled up at Loki.

"That was smart, imp," Loki praised. "Are you still hungry?"

Max shook his head. "Nope. I just wanted Thor to eat his lunch so he could eat his Snickers."

Loki laughed and ruffled his hair. "There's more than one way to outstubborn a Thunder God, huh?"

Thor gobbled down his hot dogs and chips.

"Are you still hungry, little brother?"

"Yeah!" Thor said, using the napkin to wipe his mouth.

"Then you can have your Snickers."

Loki handed his little brother the candy bar as Thor took it in his hands then looked at Loki.

"Thank you," Thor said.

"You're welcome." Loki smiled at his brother. "Looks like you remembered your manners."

He opened the Snickers and gave it to Thor.

To his shock, the toddler took it and broke it in half. "I share with Loki."

Then he gave the God of Mischief an angelic smile.

Loki took the candy and grinned down at the little boy. "Thank you. You know, little brother, you drive me nuts but you do have your moments, don't you?"

Both of them ate the Snickers and then Loki used a wet wipe to clean off their hands.

Thor held up his arms to Loki. "Loki, m'sleepy."

"Me too, Daddy," Aleta said and crawled onto the bench on his other side.

"Me, too," Max said, crawling onto the bench to sit next to Aleta.

"Then I guess it's time to go home," Loki said with a small smile.

Loki picked up Thor and put him on his shoulder.

By the time they reached the house, his brother was snoozing, sucking his thumb.

Smiling, Loki led Aleta and Max to the couch as they crawled onto the couch and settled against the pillows which had appeared against the arms of the couch.

Using his magic, Loki covered them with their favorite blankets then walked to his chair and carefully sat down.

He pulled the Got Mischief throw from the couch and covered both him and Thor with it. Then he set his recliner and put his feet up.

He had just closed his eyes when Mischief jumped up and curled up inbetween his feet, purring. Loki opened one eye and winked at the kitten. "Time for a cat nap," the god chuckled. Mischief seemed to agree as she closed her eyes and soon she and Loki were sound asleep. The house grew still and not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse.

In his sleep, Thor muttered, "Loki, where's my Snickers?"