Heal Chapter 10: Death and Despair, an inuyasha fanfic

Oh. My. God.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I cannot apologize enough for not updating for-- oh, I don't know-- THREE YEARS?!? Good GOD, I saw that and just HAD to write something. Plus I was so inexperienced when I started this that the character flaws and weird jumps in logic make me cringe... T.T; I hope my writing style will have improved to your liking.

I am now finally in college and instead of the 14 year old otaku I used to be, I am gonna be 20 in March. As in, a Japanese adult. basically nothing has changed except I'm acting more like a kid than ever and finally visited Japan, TWICE, woot and of course, I have a liiiiiceeeence... (ominous music)

I hope the wait hasn't kept you too long, and maybe this'll get some new readers as well as some old ones who wanna kill me... XD If you wanna flame me for taking so long, and it'll make you feel better, go ahead. Y'all deserve it. Go on. (dons football helmet)

Enjoy! O-matasete gomen nasai!

(P.S. Nuriko's name is now Noriko; expect changes in character, in people... and hopefully a little more depth, good Lord...)

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

HEAL

Chapter 10 : Death and Despair

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Inu-nii-chan, more! More! Over here!"

"No, me! Pick me, Nii-chan!"

"No, me!"

The sun was already down, but the parents who'd been calling for their children in exasperation were now merely watching with crossed arms and gentle smiles as the crippled half-demon had begun playing catch with the youngsters in the square, following their voices to aim. A pair of fathers were watching and chuckling as their sons waved excited arms at the dog demon, who couldn't even see their antics, and chirped at the top of their lungs to be thrown to next.

"Kids up and swarmed him the minute they saw him," one man with a grey-blue gi murmured, stifling a laugh when one boy fell on his face trying to push to the front. "Amazing... They would've run screaming from any other demon."

"We spent a lot of time running ourselves," the other whispered, "both from him or after him with spears. Poor guy deserves a break; we didn't exactly treat him well after he stopped chasing us, either."

"Mm." The man in blue nodded. "It took a near-death experience of his to heal our own prejudices somewhat... I just hope to the gods that it doesn't take that much to fix the wounds in here as well," he tapped his own chest, over his heart.

"Sou da ne... "

In validity of this quiet exchange, other old habits were proving to die hard: a few of the mothers looked a little concerned with the close proximity of the children to a demon. But every so often throughout the game, Inuyasha would flinch or sigh at a stinging in his legs, or bump against something and gasp, and the children would set him right, letting him know where they were, and keeping him away from jagged rocks or bushes. Matronly concern made their hearts melt in sympathy.

He just looked so sweet, playing with the children.

One child, however, seemed to have captured his heart out of all of them; one of the youngest girls, named Noriko. She was perched on his shoulders as her weight was slight enough not to be a burden, and the white-haired hanyou was obviously infatuated with her openness and sweet voice.

"Inu-nii-chan, can I go? I wanna go next!" she begged, tugging on his sleeve to be let down. At the achingly vibrant smile Inuyasha wore, it was clear she would be next whether she wanted to go or not. Shrugging gently, the half-demon let her slide to the ground using a nearby boulder as a step.

"Ready?" he ventured. A small 'un!' came from his left, and he ever-so-carefully tossed the ball to the side of where she stood, so as not to hit her. Inuyasha bit back a sheepish groan when he heard her yelp and run after it; he'd missed.

"Sorry," he apologized, scratching his neck. Am I never going to be able to play with her properly? he wondered, a slight heaviness casting its net over his wandering spirits. I have to learn to do this... I want to.

It must have turned to night while they'd played, because a chorus of parents were one by one calling for their little ones to head home:

"Manami-chan! Time to come in!"

"Aww, Mama--"

"You too, Kasumi!"

"Aww, man... coming, Mami," answered someone else from the little group. Slowly but surely he heard them leaving, until only a handful of parents stayed behind. Three children were still playing with the subdued hanyou: the boys and Noriko, and they seemed at ease with the late hour.

"Come in when you're done, Noriko-chan," her father called over his shoulder, heading for their fire-warmed hut with a smile in his deep voice. Inuyasha recognized it as the voice of the man who'd helped him up when he'd fallen. "Ii ka?"

"Hai," she tittered back. Something in her tone made Inuyasha pause, and an image of a tall teenager with flowing silver locks and a crescent moon on his brow made him freeze. The clarity of the moment in his mind was crystal-- a babbling brook, soft grass, the scent of a cooking meal, the glint of moonlight in his brother's golden eyes, making them shine like real gold:

An adolescent Sesshoumaru, one without the weight of life, breeding, and rank on his shoulders. "You come in when you're finished with your game, Otouto-chan. Ii ka? We don't want you to catch a cold."

"Hai!"

Nii-chan...

A flash of red, bright and painful in his eyes, and his heart contracted.

B-BMP.

Blink.

"Huh?"

"Pathetic. You're nothing but a half-breed whelp. I refuse to recognize your existance. You sicken me, Inuyasha."

His own voice: "Bastard!"

"What's wrong, Inu-nii-chan? Are you cold?"

Noriko. She was worried about the shudders wracking his body as a deluge of images swarmed his unprotected mind, curling his hands into fists. A stab of sick foreboding shot through him as memory after memory poured into his mind like an evil current:

"--Your birth was an abomination! You are a disgrace to our father's bloodline."

"Stupid, useless half-breed."

Fear, pure fear as the shadowed figure went for Kagome, intending to kill her, fear as something agonizing and bright was wrenched from his eye, feeling like his brain was going to explode--

"I should have killed you long ago," someone snarled. "You cannot defeat me!"

They had a whip, painful, with acid and poison laced through it. It burned, and he growled as he leaped to the attack. A name was on his lips, screamed in frustrated bloodlust and blinding anger. His ears were roaring, he could barely hear through the fury rushing through him-- What was the name? He could hear more clearly now...

"Se...m...ru..."

"Sessho...ru...!"

"Sesshoumaru!"

"SESSHOUMARU!!"

"No!" he whispered. "It... it couldn't be..."

It was him? All that time... The one who hurt me was...? He shook his head, confused. No-- but-- why do I remember him like--?

"Inu-nii-chan--? Inu-- ahh!"

With a frightened shriek, Noriko was quite suddenly holding Inuyasha up on top of her, struggling not to be crushed and not let him fall at the same time.

"Inu-nii-chan?! Inu-nii-chan, wa's wrong?!?"

"Nngh--" The hanyou was holding his head as though it would break apart if he didn't keep it together; eyes clenched shut, teeth gritted so that blood was most likely being drawn from the force. His cane clattered uselessly to the pebbled floor as the two men came running, reaching to relieve the little girl of her heavy burden.

"What happened?"

"I dunno, he jus' fell over!"

"Holy--"

"What's happening to his hair?"

Beneath the rain of chatter, one word emerged from the changing hanyou's lips:

"...Nii-chan..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

If there had ever been a time when Sesshoumaru had ignored trying to keep things quiet, it wouldn't have held a candle to his attitude right now. The silver-haired demon was leaping from rooftop to rooftop, making a loud bang each time he hit the shingles and basically waking the whole village. And to top it off, he was bellowing at the top of his lungs.

"Inuyasha! Brother?! Inuyasha, answer me!"

His scent trail was as Shippou had said: they'd been walking back to the hut, then the children had come and he'd wandered off to play with them. Trouble was, he'd played EVERYWHERE. The strength of his scent was the same all over the village, and he couldn't hear anything but the rushing of the river beside him.

Damn it all... He'll be feeling the effects by now, Sesshoumaru realized, taking the jump to the ground and running the pathways on foot. "INUYASHA!" he yelled.

Nothing, nothing-- Damn it all--

A shriek came from his right, punctuated by voices raised in alarm:

"What happened?"

"I dunno, he jus' fell over!"

THERE. A streak of white was all that was visible as Sesshoumaru shot down the path and into the square.

"Damn that man, he knows we're too slow to follow like that!" Kagome fumed, running at full speed with her skirt practically flying up in the wind. Miroku didn't mind at all running behind her.

"That way!" he yelled at the girl's loud shriek.

The two of them came skidding into the clearing just after Sesshoumaru had landed beside the hanyou's prostrate form. He was definitely hurting.

The demon lord had gone into full-blown protective brother mode. "Inuyasha?! Inuyasha, wake up--" Sesshoumaru had grabbed the half-demon possessively from the villagers' grasp and hoisted him up into his lap, momentarily forgetting just how grateful he should be at having both hands to do so. "Inuyasha--?"

He paused.

A warm, wet something had just dripped onto his wrist.

With wide eyes the demon lord looked in mute horror at the drop of dark blood staining his skin.

Oh. No.

Sesshoumaru's prediction had been right. His brother's demon blood was waning, allowing its natural healing powers to disappear along with it. In only moments things would be back to the way they were before he'd been healed. Fear was rapidly clawing at his insides as he realized there was nothing they could do to stop it. Come on, not now, not here!

With a low moan from the half-demon in his lap, Sesshoumaru was brought back to the present problem. "Inuyasha, hang on; we're going to get you some help," he soothed, trying to hold him tighter in an effort to let him see that he wasn't alone.

"Nii-chan--"

Sesshoumaru winced inwardly, despair clenching his heart. "It's okay, brother, I'm right here with you."

Oh gods, please, not this again, anything but this-- He was doing so well--

"Hahahahaha," a deep voice chuckled throatily from the forest's edge: "So nice to play with you again after so long, Inuyasha. Come, let's get you back home, shall we?"

Kagome froze, looking up and going still as a statue.

The square went as quiet as death. One by one, all the torches flared and snuffed out like cheap candles, leaving only moonlight to cast shadows on the streets. Miroku paled as the voice registered in his head, and the name dripped from the monk's lips with unadulterated hatred as two red eyes glowed from the foliage:

The one who'd cursed his family. The one whose evil was even now feeding off of his life-force and sentencing him to an early death. The one who'd caused all of them more pain and suffering than they should ever have had to experience.

"Naraku," he snarled.

Another chilling laugh sent the humans behind them running for cover, some screaming for their children, others shouting for weaponry to be brought, raising the cry of 'DEMON!' Villagers were scattering left and right, trying to flee or fight. Both would have been in vain.

"Yes, yes, run," he laughed. "Ah, such funny little cockroaches, aren't they, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

The Lord of the Western Lands was stone faced, glaring with the cold fires of damnation into the darkness from whence the voice came.

"You are not welcome here," he growled, his canines showing from beneath a curled lip. Inuyasha whimpered, and he tried to calm him in his distress, holding his sibling closer to his chest, not removing his gaze from the shadows for a moment.

"Oh, I hope you don't mind, milord," the voice continued, unseen, "I went looking for you in your mountain fortress. Terribly troublesome to get by; so many vermin to dispose of..."

Sesshoumaru's eyes went wide.

No.

"You needn't worry, Lord Sesshoumaru. I took care of everything. Your infestation is no more," he continued silkily. "Here, I bring you a gift to remember it by. Feel free to hang it where you will."

With a loud thump, something dropped from the trees and fell in two pieces to the dusty ground:

A head...

...and a body.

A very, very small body.

Kagome gasped and turned her eyes away, leaning into Miroku, who stood open-mouthed and motionless at the horrible sight.

The dark hair of the severed head was soft and long; Sesshoumaru knew because he'd brushed it so many times. The eyes: big, chocolate-coloured eyes, were half open and flooded with tears. The skin was white, even more so than usual, and from the lips was a rivulet of blood leaking down to the neck. On one side of the head was a little sprig of ponytail, still held by the cloth tie he'd placed there only a few months ago.

Rin...

"I knew it'd please you," Naraku purred at him. "You're speechless."

It was three months ago he'd left, and she'd smiled with her usual: 'Itterasshai!' He felt himself growing ill as her final words rang out in his head.

'You'll be back in no time, right, Lord Sesshoumaru?'

'Ne, next time I'll go with you! I'll be old enough soon--'

'Lord Sesshoumaru?'

He hadn't answered her.

"Rin." The name came out as a croak.

It was like a dream. He couldn't take his eyes off her, couldn't move, not even to gather her in his arms. He stared at the lifeless body sprawled in front of him like a doll, not speaking, not moving even at Naraku's amused laughter. At last, his body seemed to move on its own and slowly he rose, nearly tipping an unconscious Inuyasha to the ground before Miroku could grab him.

"Sesshoumaru, wait--!"

He didn't heed the cry. Kneeling next to the limp body and the severed head, the silver-haired demon placed one hand tenderly upon it, stroking the soft hair with a gentle claw. "Rin," he murmured hoarsely.

"I will take my leave," came the mocking reply. "It looks like our two brothers are not well. I'll come to collect the hanyou when he's feeling a bit more up to some playtime." A plume of miasma began rising from the vale.

"Naraku!" Kagome screamed.

Sesshoumaru stared at Rin's motionless face in the dirt, unmoving, unresponsive.

Naraku...

A flame was growing in his head, in his chest, slowly eating outward at it's icy prison.

Naraku.

Hotter now. Burning.

He did this.

He did this to her.

HE DID THIS TO HER.

"Naraku." The word tumbled from his lips.

Both miko and houshi looked up as Sesshoumaru stood, faltering on his feet as if he would fall. "Naraku," he whispered.

'Lord Sesshoumaru!'

A smile. A kind, loving smile.

The flame burst into life.

"NARAKUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes were blasted open in a comet of violent ki as he screamed his rage to the sky. White hot light was blazing from his pupils as he roared his anguish and killing anger from the depths of his being. His muscles bulged and writhed like snakes beneath his skin, hands crushing into rock-hard fists, his teeth elongating into razor-sharp spikes.

Kagome pulled Inuyasha away as a blast of heat and storm wind rushed over them, circulating out from the enraged demon lord's convulsing form. "Miroku!" she cried, trying to shield the injured half-demon from the blasting torrent. "What's happening?!"

"He's out of control!" yelled Miroku, draping himself over the two of them as small tree branches and acorn-sized pebbles began to pelt the huddled pair. "We have to get Inuyasha out of here!"

Sesshoumaru's body was twisting, rising up above the trees as he grew larger and larger, still screaming, his nose forming a canine snout, his tail shooting outward into a sweeping arc. Two decades-old oak trees were crushed into splinters as Sesshoumaru sprang ever upward, howling like a beast from hell. His eyes shone red in the blackness and tore through the curtain of night, laying onto a bright spot of ki moving quickly into the forest.

A feral, predatory instinct took over and his mind locked down onto the target moving away into the mountains.

This one wasn't getting away.

In a streak of angry white, Sesshoumaru shrieked out a bloodthirsty bellow, tearing a hole of pure white into the night as he ran after his prey.

"Sesshoumaru, no! Come back!" Kagome shouted, tears filling her eyes. "SESSHOUMARU!"

He didn't look back.

The winds died, and the evening was dark once more, punctuated only by the rush of the river and Inuyasha's labored breath.

Rin's pale hand lay sprawled over the ground, and in her palm lay a tiny carving of a dog, with a crescent moon on its forehead. Her fingers were still grasping it with a tenderness that shouldn't have been possible for the dead, unnoticed.

A tear slipped from Kagome's eye as she stared up at the new moon where the demon had vanished.

"Sesshoumaru..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Hours later, near dawn, Inuyasha was no better. His pitch black hair was matted with sweat and blood, as almost all of his wounds had reopened. "Gah! Isn't there anything we can do to stop this?!" Kagome cried in exasperation, wiping her soaking brow. Her hands were covered in bright red.

"We have only to wait until dawn," Kaede conceded, "and that is only a few hours away. I believe he will make it through tonight." The old woman threw a bundle of kindling onto the fire, trying to light another log on the hearth.

"I hope so," she said tiredly, pulling the blanket over him as he sighed from the ache in his stomach. "I can't take another night like this."

"Aye, child," Kaede answered. "But Sesshoumaru may present another problem. Going after a foe such as Naraku on one's own is not a wise decision."

Kagome watched as Inuyasha twitched in his sleep. But if only she could have seen... Poor Rin... And Sesshoumaru; he must have been hurting so badly; I've never seen him react like that--

Nearby, Miroku was chanting a spell and adding even more wards to shelter the hut from demons. There was no way they could survive an attack in the state they were in. Outside, Sango, Kilala and Shippou were gathering more wood for the fire, along with a few medicinal herbs. In reality, the taijiya was really looking for an excuse to get the young fox away from the gory scene, and give the adults time to mend things before Shippou was truly traumatized. He hadn't been handling this well; especially feeling that he was responsible.

A knock on the doorframe made Kagome look up, and a flash of white caused her heart to leap into her throat.

Naraku... Is he back?

"Let me in, monk," came the exhausted request. "I can't pass through the door."

Sesshoumaru had returned.

"Sesshoumaru?!" Kagome leapt up and ripped the seal off the doorframe, parting the noren and peering out at the demon Lord. "Are you all-- Ah!"

Blood was dripping from a deep gash that covered most of Sesshoumaru's chest and gut. He was barely standing; his mouth was bleeding as well, and closer inspection showed a slice of skin taken out of his cheek and forehead in a vicious stripe across his face. His eyes were dead and dull, features completely slack.

Kagome was shaking.

"Oh my God-- Sesshoumaru--"

"'M fine... I'll be fine," he muttered. "Fine... Unhh--" As he stepped through the door, his legs gave way from under him and Kagome was swift to catch him, completely freaking out. His entire weight flopped onto the girl, and she felt a hot gush of blood pour out onto her, soaking all the way through her clothes.

"MIROKU!" she yelled hysterically.

Miroku was pulling him off of her and laying him onto his back before she even finished yelling his name. "Lift him up; we need to stop his bleeding," he barked out.

"Unngh," Sesshoumaru was pulling into himself, grimacing from the pain as the houshi pressed a wad of cloth into his wound. His eyes found hers, glistening. "I couldn't-- I couldn't kill him--"

"None of us could, Sesshoumaru, it's not your fault," she assured him, cupping his face in her palm. A bloody fingerprint lingered on her cheek, streaking from her tears as she smiled forcedly at the silver-haired man. "It's not your fault. We will get him someday."

"No... I couldn't--" he choked. "I couldn't save her-- Inuyasha-- I couldn't--"

"Come, Kaede, we need to deal with Inuyasha's wounds," Miroku murmured. He could feel that they needed to give the demon some privacy, so he quickly left her side and led Kaede along with him to tend Inuyasha, once he saw that Sesshoumaru's wounds were healing. His demonic blood was already visibly repairing him, so he was definitely going to survive, but his wall of stability was crumbling fast.

"Sesshoumaru, no," Kagome begged him. "You couldn't have known that he-- It wasn't your fault. She wouldn't want you to feel like this."

Her hand found his, and he fell apart.

Crying like a baby, the Lord of the Western Lands curled onto his side and sobbed until he couldn't breathe, leaning against Kagome's stomach. The miko crushed his head into her lap, cradling him and rocking him in motherly fashion.

"She-- She was just a child," gasped Sesshoumaru. "She was--"

"I know, I know," the girl soothed, her own tears pouring down like rain. "I know, shh..."

Through the open window, a beam of morning sunlight came streaming in, illuminating the figures inside.

It brought no warmth.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o

OMG, that was depressing. That chapter did NOT go where I expected it to... I actually do have a plan with this though, so ha. (I just KNOW I'm gonna get flames for killing off Rin... For my purposes, no Tenseiga exists, so double ha. XD)

TTYAL! I'll update sooner than last time, be assured.

Oh, and more review carrots means longer, quicker updates from the Plot Bunny...

GIMME REVIEW CRACK TO FINISH THIS WHACKED FIC WITH, PEOPLE.