AN: Thank you all for reading this! I've really enjoyed all of your comments, and I hope you enjoy this final chapter.
Zane knew the others often talked about him. It was completely obvious, from the conversations that died off and hurriedly restarted on a new topic to the requests made of him to go do something "real quick," but Zane did not mind. He knew they had good intentions, and more importantly, they cared about him. He also knew why they were talking about him, which he did not mind either. They were concerned about him, and to be honest, he was a little concerned as well. He knew he could not go on forever acting like nothing had happened, but he was afraid of what would happen when he finally faced his experiences.
It was this fear that, perhaps irrationally, led him to what he was doing now, namely standing pressed against the wall in the hallway outside the lounge room inside of which Kai, Nya, Lloyd, Jay, Cole, and Wu were working. Zane was supposed to be getting supper ready, and he would do so in a moment, but for now he would see what the others thought would be helpful. It was likely their insights would prove valuable for once he was ready to process.
For a bit, the others chatted absentmindedly while they worked, hopping from topic to topic, but after a few minutes, the conversation turned more seriously to the topic Zane had been hoping for, namely himself.
"Do you think we should try to convince Zane to go see a therapist?" Lloyd was asking over the sound of someone hammering. "It could help."
"Yeah, but what kind of therapist deals with being treated as less than a person and being experimented on?" Jay wondered.
"I don't know," Lloyd admitted. "I don't actually know anything about therapists other than that they're supposed to be able to help people."
"We don't even know if he'd go," Kai pointed out. "Zane's been trying to act like nothing even happened, like being home for a couple of minutes was all he needed to be fine again. He probably wouldn't go."
"But we could offer it to him," Nya suggested. "That's all we can do for now, offer things and hope he'll take us up on them."
"I wish there was something more we could do, something more solid," Cole mused.
"Zane's healing process is up to him. We may offer assistance, we may encourage, and we may try to persuade him, but in the end it is in his hands," Wu stated.
The conversation trailed off after that, turning to light comments on the task at hand, so Zane turned away and walked down the hall, careful not to make any noise that would indicate he had been listening. He made it to the kitchen and started preparing supper, but his actions were automatic and habitual. His thoughts were on the words he had just heard.
The others all wanted to help and were coming up with to do so, but like Wu said, it was up to Zane.
It was up to him, like everything else. The entirety of his freedom simultaneously weighed him down and lifted him up. While he had been with Azizi, the only thing that was up to him was whether to submit, and by the end of his time there, even that was taken away by the remote control. Now, everything was up to him to decide. He could do whatever he wished, go wherever he wished, be whoever he wished.
And what did Zane do with all this freedom as it became clear to him?
He began to tear up.
It made no sense. He hadn't cried the entire time he was with Azizi, why was he crying now? Why did this overwhelm him, not the experiments, not the scientists, not the dismissals and the cruelties and the wounds both physical and emotional, but this? Why did the same situation he had been in before the first trial hit him so hard after the appeal?
It was because of everything he had been through. Although Zane wished it had not, it had changed him. His choices and his rights and his very personhood had been taken from him, and although they had been returned to him in the end, that did not alter the fact that for a time they had been gone.
Tears began slipping from Zane's eyes. At first he tried to ignore them and continue his cooking, but as they persisted, Zane stopped what he was doing and just stood there, letting the tears come. It felt... Not good, not entirely, but almost soothing. Zane hadn't exactly cried since he'd returned home, but he had broken down in fear and sorrow a few times, although no tears had come. Each time, he had separated himself as best he could from the others until he could get a hold of himself.
This time, however, he felt like that was not the thing to do. He was reminded suddenly of the day this all had started, the day of his father's funeral, as well as the few days before that. His family had helped him through his mourning of his father. They could help him through his mourning of his days with Azizi as well.
With that in mind, Zane headed toward the lounge. Tears still trailing down his face at a steady pace, he headed toward his family, and, although he did not know it with certainty at the time, he headed towards truly healing.