I'm back

This Fanfiction contains Manga-Spoilers!

„Historia. No, sorry. Your Majesty."
The tender, blonde Queen of Paradis turned her head around. This couldn't be.
This was not possible. She was dreaming, there was no other option.
Historia dreamed so often about her girlfriend's return, but when she woke up she was always alone.
For full 4 years.

"Ymir?"
Her voice was quiet, kind of broken.
The blonde's hands were holding her belly underneath and her blue eyes met with these honey-golden ones she used to love so much.
"I came back for you, my Queen.", the tall brunette said and kneeled down as Historia turned around, Ymir's gaze was down.

There was a short time of silence, until Ymir lifted her head to find, that her love was not alone.
She was carrying someone. Someone new.
Historia saw that something broke inside her, when Ymir realized that she was pregnant.
Suddenly, she herself felt like she cheated on her.
Ymir stood up, they kept the distance.
This wasn't the reunion they both dreamed of every night. It was the total opposite of it.
There was just one question in Ymir's head, just one short question. Three words.
Words, which would decide if she would stay of if she would go again, this time forever.

"Are you happy?"

Historia parted her lips to speak, it was nothing more than a whisper, but Ymir understood.

"No."

This was enough. It needed not more than this single, short word.
Ymir raised her body to get back on her feet, she walked over to the blonde girl she used to know, the girl who became a woman. A beautiful, but broken woman.
There were tears in these azure eyes, it broke her heart.
Ymir wrapped her arms around Historia, who wrapped hers around the tanned neck of the other.
It wasn't that easy, as the Queen was short before giving birth.
"You grew, I remember you being much smaller.", Ymir smirked slightly with watering eyes.
"I missed you so much…", the blonde sobbed and her tears watered Ymir's shirt, even if a small chuckle was to hear when the freckled woman made a comment about her height.
"I thought of you every day, my Queen. I'm sorry, I … should have never left you."
They just stood there, on a field not far away from a country house where Historia lived since she was sure to be pregnant.
"Yes, you should have stayed…it would have changed so much…"

Inside the country house they sat down in the living room.
It was modestly furnished, but it was perfectly clean and everything seemed to be kind of new.
The royal baby and its mother shouldn't miss anything.
They talked, they talked much. What happened on Paradis, about politics and alliances and what was the price for staying alive. And what Historia had to do in this plan.
She had no choice but to continue her royal bloodline to make sure, that there was always someone with royal blood to inherit the Beast and the Founding Titan.
According the Azumabito Clan, this was the only way to save the people inside the walls.
So Historia confirmed to stick with the plan what led her to become pregnant to save humanity.
She was just a chess piece, she just did what was necessary.
"…I wanted to live for myself. As I promised you 4 years ago. But as you were gone, I… a part of me went with you. And it took my pride with it, or so it felt like it left with you.", Historia sighted.
One hand was on top of her belly, the other one was holding it underneath.
Ymir nodded and a sight left her throat.
"I see. Damn… this. This is all my fault. I would have never let that happen, I-…"
Historia stopped her and looked her right in the eyes.
"But you left. And it happened."
There was silence for a while.
"Do you want me to leave?", Ymir asked and Historia shook her head after a few seconds.
"No." – "So…what do you want? I'll do anything for you. Anything."
Historia closed her eyes and took a deep breath, the baby was moving, it felt that its mother was upset. She opened her eyes again and caught Ymir's golden orbs with her azure ones.
"Stay with me."
Her voice was shivering, tears were running over her porcelain skin and her shoulders were shaking.
No words could describe what Ymir was feeling when she heard those words, so she just acted.
Ymir got up and kneeled down to Historia's feet, she took her hand. There was no ring on it.
She looked up to her.
"His'. I'm sorry. For everything. For leaving you, for causing you all the pain, for… leaving you alone with all this crap, this shit, this fucking-…" – "You didn't change, did you?"
Both smiled and chuckled a bit, Ymir shook her head.
"Nah. I'm the same shitty human being as always." – "I noticed that."
Ymir hemmed and her cheeks went slightly red.
"I…this time I… I want to ask you one last time.", she started and her eyes kept looking in Historia's.
"I'm pretty sure to be the last one who should ask that but you know me, I don't care."
She took a deep breath.
"Historia Reiss, marry me after I finish this proposal, please?"
The blonde took her free hand to cover her mouth with it and she nodded in tears.
"I-…I should have said yes so many times before, Ymir…", she sobbed and pulled Ymir up with her hands on her cheeks to lean her forehead against hers.
"Yes… yes, I want to marry you, Ymir…", she whispered before she closed the distance which was left between their lips.
They kissed, it was not passionate. It was lovely and soft, they took their time and parted as oxygen was becoming rare.
It felt like eternity, both missed this feeling so much, it filled their bodies with joy.
"I love you… I never stopped loving you, Ymir…", she whispered with a shivering voice and Ymir wiped her tears away.
"Me neither. I have always loved you."

The day became night and both were laying in the big bed Historia normally shared with the father of her unborn child.
It bothered Ymir, but she did not had the courage to ask her about the baby's father.
She felt like she had no right to ask her about it, but Historia was finally the one asking her.
"Ymir. Don't you want to know? About…", she started and looked down on her belly.
"I have no right to, do I?", she replied and Historia's gaze went to the ceiling.
"Maybe I want to tell you." – "I won't stop you."
Historia thought a moment about it, before she started to speak.
"He's the son of a noble family here on the countryside. He… lived near to the farm where I was born.", she started to explain and caressed her belly while talking.
"When I decided to stick with this plan, to become a mother to several children… I of course needed to choose a father. He volunteered at an orphanage I opened and I met him when I was there to check if the children are alright."
She laughed quietly and turned her head to face Ymir again.
"I knew I could never love someone again after I lost you. But there was no other way, so I talked to him. I instantly knew who he was, there was no doubt. He was one of the boys who threw stones at me when I was a small girl." – "Wow, a real romantic, huh." – "Ymir. He apologized, he felt bad for what he did to me when we were children. That was the cause he was volunteering at the orphanage. We met several times and he treated me good. He was nice to me and that was enough.
I just needed someone who is interested in me, who would make babies with me and… who won't hurt me. Someone I can trust, at least a bit. So I chose him.", she explained and Ymir felt her stomach turned over. Someone was so close to her queen. So close like she was before.
She used to be the only one, now there was someone else.
Historia could read in Ymir's eyes, she knew exactly what she was thinking, what she felt.
"Ymir. He was never as close as you. We… had sex, for sure. But I don't love him. I never loved him and I will never do. I will never feel what I felt with you.", she said and laid one hand on a freckled cheek.
"Promise?" – "I promise."
Ymir leaned forward to kiss the lips she longed for 4 years. They tasted as sweet as she remembered.
"Where is he? Won't he be pissed when he finds us in your bed? Not that I would care."
Historia shook her head.
"He went to the city. He will be back tomorrow noon.", she answered and Ymir just nodded a bit.
"Alright. So… you did not marry him? I mean, no ring, you said yes to me a few hours ago~", Ymir started to list with her typical tone.
"No. I did not want that. He asked me, but I said no." – "Why? He's the father of your baby."
Historia smiled and stroked her belly.
"Yes, he is. But… Ymir. You asked me several times to marry you, I never took it serious, but when I read your letter I regretted it. I regret to never properly answer to it. I regret that I never got to marry you. So I decided I would never marry unless it is you.", she explained and Ymir tried to hold back her tears. She was never a person to cry much, but those words touched her heart.
"You… you decided this, because of me…? Even if you thought I was dead?", she asked and wiped hastily over her eyes.
"Yes. Why should I marry, unless it's you?", Historia smiled and kissed Ymir's tears away.
It became late, both were more than tired so they decided to get some sleep.

The morning came and Historia woke up to a familiar face she was sure to never see again.
But she was here, laying right next to her, still sleeping peacefully.
Historia was laying on her side, face-to-face with her presumed dead girlfriend.
No. Her fiancée.
She smiled, this was real, this really happened right now.
The blonde moved her tender hand to stroke carefully over the freckles on Ymir's tanned skin with her fingertips, she couldn't answer the question why she loved these small spots, she just did.
"…I love you…", she whispered and suddenly she cried as a thought hit her mind which destroyed every hope.
Again.
"Why are you crying, dear…?", a husky, sleepy voice said and golden eyes met the watering blue one's which belong to Paradis' Queen.
"You will leave me again…", Historia answered with a broken voice and Ymir wiped away her hot tears. Her eyebrows were drawn together to a worried expression.
"Hey. I'll never leave you again, you hear me?", she said quietly and kissed her pale forehead.
"You will. You… have not even one year left, Ymir…this curse will steal you from me.", she said and Ymir wiped away the new tears.
"But the time I got left is all yours, my queen. I'm sorry. I would do anything to get rid of that curse."
Historia shook her head slightly.
"No. If… if you weren't cursed, if… you never inherited that Jaw Titan. We would have never met.", Historia said and took a deep breath.
"I just don't know if I can take it to lose you again. I'm not strong enough."
Ymir shook her head and laid her hands on Historia's cheeks.
"You're stronger than anyone I know. Really. I will always be your ally. And I'm always by your side. Remember? This promise is valid even when I'm dead. I will always watch over you, even if I'm not here anymore.", she said and Historia let out a loud sob.
She nodded and got closer to her love who wrapped her arms around her and kissed her hair softly.

Noon came and the two women were sitting on the porch of the country house.
They drank tea as eventually a carriage appeared in front of the house.
A tall and skinny but quite trained man stepped out of it and smiled in Historia's direction.
When he saw that she wasn't alone he walked over with fast steps.
"Historia! Is everything okay? Who is this? Is she-…" – "It's okay."
Ymir didn't get up, she just eyed him up. She was jealous, she couldn't do anything about it.
"…", he gave that gaze back to Ymir and turned to Historia to bend down for a kiss, but she denied it by stopping him with her hand in his chest.
"We need to talk."

Inside the house they sat together in the living room, Ymir next to Historia, the baby's father in front of them. The talk was long.
"…so you tell me, she's the one you love.", he said and raked his fingers through his blonde hair.
"I told you from the beginning. What we have is not a real relationship. I admire that you care for me, are nice to me. You treat me good and I'm thankful for this. But she's my fate.", Historia said und Ymir couldn't hide a smirk.
"It's not that I will kick you out or something like this. It's our baby and it needs you and me. Ymir won't be here forever, she's a Titan Shifter. She has barely one year left. But I will spend the time she has left with her. And I will marry her.", she said and his eyes widened a bit.
"Marry her?" – "Yes, that's what she said." – "Ymir, please."
He laughed quietly.
"So, she's the cause you said no to me, am I right?"
Historia sighted and nodded.
"Yes."
He nodded.
"So. When she's gone. Will you marry me then?", he asked and Ymir grinded her teeth,
"This is not the time to talk about this." – "Oh, well, yes it is, Historia!"
He was pissed. He really developed feelings for the tender Queen, he knew she did not love him but it worked. And now someone appeared from nowhere and Historia wanted to marry her instantly.
"We will talk about it, when the time has come.", Historia decided and he just nodded.
"Whatever you wish, your majesty." – "Don't call me that."
Everyone sighted.
"I'm sorry. I did not want to speak like that to you. Just image what I was just told."
Historia nodded: "Yes. I'm sorry. But this is how it is now. I don't want to hurt you on purpose."
Ymir kept quiet, it wasn't easy for her but this was something between Historia and this guy.
"I know. I understand. So what do you want me to do now? Stay away?", he asked and the Queen shook her head.
"No, although we have to change something. I want to live with Ymir to be by her side for the time she has left. I will deliver soon, labor will come the next days, I can feel it. I want you to be there when our baby is born. You're the father, of course I want you to be there then.", she explained and he agreed.
"I will sleep in one of the guest rooms then.", he said and got up.
"Call me if you need something.", with that, he was gone.
"Wow okay? I thought this would be much uglier.", Ymir said with one eyebrow raised.
"No. He knows what this is about, I never lied to him. He knows that I don't love him. And I'm still the Queen, he has to obey.", Historia explained and turned to the other woman.
"Let's just forget him for now, alright? This is now just about you and me. Until the day you need to go…", she said and took both hands of the freckled woman.
Ymir nodded and kissed the pale hands she hold in hers.
"I love you. I will always love you, His'." – "I know, Ymir. And so will I."
She leaned over and Ymir leaned down to kiss these perfect shaped lips of hers.

Evening came and the couple was laying outside on the grass, counting stars.
"Hey, His.", Ymir started and the blonde turned her head to her love.
"Yeah?"
"Do you…know what it is? A boy or a girl?"
"Hm… I think it's a girl. I don't know, it just feels like it."
"Do you… have a name for her?"
Historia smiled and turned her head to the stars again.
"I was thinking about this for a while now."
"So, what name do you want to give her?"
Historia smiled, one hand was holding Ymir's the other was laying on her belly.

"Ymir."