Good grief, it feels like I've spent an eternity in my room.

Fortunately, thanks to the wonders of science and technology, the world is at our fingertips no matter where we are or who we are. Unless you're a certain man-gorilla hybrid, in which case you're a prime example of science gone wrong.

Sitting before me on my desk is my computer. Don't let its simplicity fool you. This is the entrance to a terrifying realm with time travellers running rampant with their testimonies, very possibly causing the next World War in our lifetimes.

Thanks to the disappearance of my telepathic abilities, gone are my days of playing discounted video games which no one ever plays. I can finally partake in the simple joys of the average, normal, teenage male.

I shall create a Raddit account and upvote posts on the front page.

These are called, "Rad" posts, I believe. Everytime you upvote something, a voice clip saying "THAT'S RAD!" plays. Yes, in capital letters and with an exclamation mark. And a little man in sunglasses pops up in the corner of your screen and gives a thumbs up.

Alright, I am now "normalperson123". Let's take a look.

["The Government is Lying!1! PROOF, 100% REAL"]

Sounds like just the kind of thing idiots would fall for.

There's a reply by… "JetBlackWings666".

["i knew it! must be working tgt w/ the Dark Reunion! upvote if u agree!"]

And it's got… Zero upvotes.

And here's another post, this time it's from "rad/omgz".

[I saw an angel today! - PHOTO ATTACHED - ]

There's a million upvotes.

Of course, it's an image of Teruhashi on the street, taken from around a corner probably by an unsuspecting male. You can tell by the golden glow and sounds of angels singing when you open the image.

Maybe the other posts on the front page have more interesting content.

[NEW SPECIES OF GORILLA DISCOVERED IN LOCAL ZOO]

Wow- Hold on. That's just a photo of Nendou. Why is he in the gorilla enclosure- Oh, he's just gone back to his natural habitat. Of course.

Good grief. I still don't understand how trawling through all that nonsense is at all interesting-

[COFFEE JELLY PROMOTION NATIONWIDE IN JAPANESE CONVENIENCE STORE CHAIN]

…

THAT'S RAD!