East Blue! Part I

Fooling Garp

"So Luffy... You're gonna be a good marine just like your grandfather, yes?" Garp the Fist asks and looks at his little grandson. The brat is thirteen years old and a bit too small but that's alright. Stealth is a trait of a respectable marine, after all, and small people can sneak better. (Nobody tells him he's the exact opposite.)

Luffy's pouting. His straw hat still rests on his head and he wants to be the Pirate King. But gramps is always nagging and it's so annoying because Luffy knows if he agrees on becoming a marine, he actually gets gifts like training and not the usual "Fist of Love" for disagreeing.

Ace is setting sail in less than three months and then he doesn't even have a partner to become strong enough for the world out there. Dadan and the other bandits are his family but they aren't exactly a fit bunch of people. Luffy is sometimes reckless but he knows it's not going to work if he trains alone in the wilderness.

He has to resort to drastic measures, also known as thinking. Gives him headaches.

And, oh no, it works! There is this really dumb idea sprouting inside his mind and it will overthrow some of his plans, alter the way people perceive him and maybe it will not work out... but Luffy also doesn't want to lie to his family. Yes, gramps IS family, even though he mistreats him constantly, put him out in the jungle when he was a mere child, gave him to some random strangers who are also criminals and still expects him to become a marine and the only true birthday present from Garp was this weird marine t-shirt at age eight... why is Garp family again? Ah, okay, blood, yeah.

The fact that he can't lie to save his life also plays a role.

Alright, it's not as if he could cause some inner conflict in the Marine Headquarters by doing that. So, he looks up to his gramps who's still waiting for at least some kind of answer and asks him: "Hey, gramps, if I promise to become a good marine would you train me? I mean here, not in some stuffy base. You wouldn't even have to tell anyone, right?"

Garp looks decidedly shocked and a shimmer gleams in his eyes. "Bwahahaha! That's my grandson! Sure, come on, we'll train before you set out to a marine base. When will you do that?"

Luffy sweats a little. But he has heard that nearly all islands around Goa have a marine base so the question can be distorted to "When will you, as a pirate, go to one of these islands which are under the protection of the government?" so he says: "Shishishi, at seventeen of course! If you train me yourself, I can become the best of the Marines!"

That's true as well if you think about it. By starting a crew, he inherently is the best one in that crew... because there are no others.

Garp tears up and actually hugs Luffy. Huh, that's weird. It's as if gramps actually loves him. It's also pretty awkward. Should he hug his grandpa like any other human? Is grandpa a human to begin with?

Good thing that the embrace doesn't last that long.

"Come on, brat. Let's make a fantastic marine out of you!"

Alvida and Coby

Luffy still couldn't believe that grandpa would have let him become a pirate without knowing any of the stuff he'd taught him. He refuses to believe it. He refuses to believe Garp would have rather let him die as a punishment for not being a marine than to actually ensure his safety and wellbeing. Because the basic marine stuff is already so unbelievably effective if you have the strength to do it properly that Luffy had a short-lived crisis when he'd thought about all the vice-admirals and admirals he would encounter in his pirate life.

Hopefully Ace finds some crewmembers who know these tricks and some more who can teach him haki and rokushiki. Basic navigation, basic information gathering, basic cooking skills, basic camp building, basic self-defence, basic light sleeping, basic technology and even basic knowledge all were things Luffy hadn't had a single clue about when he started training with Garp.

It's funny how soft his grandfather suddenly had become while teaching them basics. There is no "just hit it until it dies" in those things and Garp's actually a smart man when he doesn't act like a jackass.

There's a clench in Luffy's stomach when he realizes he's using his gramps as means to become a criminal. There's also sweat-dropping when he thinks that he could have lost his nakama or his life because Garp is too stubborn to help his own grandson who has the dream of becoming the Pirate King. An eye for an eye they say. Luffy's just glad he knows things now.

Other stuff is rather ridiculous and the marines themselves are totally not following their own set of rules. For example the clothing thing which says that every marine has to obey to strict rules concerning dressing themselves. That also includes headwear. He's never seen his gramps with a shitty marine cap or a white fedora hat with some swirly design on it... maybe they nowadays just take it for granted everybody's ignoring that rule?

Garp has retreated to the headquarters. "Make me proud, Luffy!" he'd said tearing up a bit. Would have been more genuine if he hadn't dug in his nose while doing that. So Luffy heads out without his grandpa but with the whole town at the shore, yelling him words of encouragement. They, surprisingly enough, both know and respect his dream. They just didn't feel it necessary to tell Garp as well.

Luffy beats down a sea king, navigates cunningly around a whirlpool and ends up on the beach of a small island. When he spots the grand ship... mind you, the pink, overly feminine ship with hearts on each side, he goes on land approximately half a kilometre away from it so that there is no way they see him before he sees them.

Hammering sounds reach Luffy's trained ears ("basic information gathering") and he shaves to the source of it when his observation haki sends him a shape of weakness. Said shape of weakness has light pink hair, glasses perched on his chubby nose and is building an atrocious boat. Honestly, sailing with this self-made dinghy is guaranteed suicide.

"You're not gonna go off with that, are you?"

Suddenly, the younger boy starts wailing and apologizing before noticing that Luffy's not one of Alvida's men. Well, at least he's never seen such a normal looking crewmember before. So either the one in front of him with the black t-shirt, dark brown shorts (the pockets of the thing are rather well filled), black boots and straw hat is a newbie or actually someone not belonging to Alvida. Coby hopes so dearly it's the latter.

It is.

They introduce themselves to each other, talk about their job wishes ("You can't be serious, Pirate King?! Ow, why did you flick my my forehead?" "Ah, dunno, felt like it. So you wanna be a marine or what?"). Then Luffy surprises him and takes out the entire crew of Alvida plus the fat whale lady herself. When asked what he is going to now with them, Luffy tells him to help gathering unconscious pirates without a bounty and dispose them on the deserted island. Coby is so used to commands by now he doesn't even question it and instead grabs two of his former crewmates by their scruff and gathers them and the following men into a human pile.

Three guys and Alvida are left on the ship when Coby's done and Luffy has finished exchanging the sails for normal white ones he finds in some chest.

"So, Coby, I have packed my things, my own boat is here as well... sails are different, wind is well" at that Luffy holds out a finger covered with spit ("basic knowledge"), "let's go to Shells Town!" When it finally clicks in Coby's head he begins weeping and stuttering "thank you".

"Shishishi, you're weird. Of course I take you with me! We're friends now, aren't we?"

Axe Hand Morgan and Zoro

"Oi, wanna learn something cool?"

With such a huge ship it is at times a little bit lame but Luffy likes it in general. Yeah, the colour and galleon's figure will definitely be replaced but those are just small inconveniences right now. All in all he is already a good Marine. It says in paragraph twelve: "Everything a pirate possesses is officially the marine's property." He feels as if he's living a single dragged out joke but that's alright.

Coby makes as questioning noise. Luffy moonwalks for the first time in front of someone other than his grandpa and Makino (she was really cool with it to his dismay; he wanted a funnier reaction, damn it!).

After profoundly claiming it isn't a devil fruit ability as he is a rubberman and not some... phoenix or something like that, the pink haired boy nods heftily because he really wants to do that too!

So, Luffy teaches him the moonwalk.

They still haven't arrived at Shells Town. Ah, fuck it. Observation Haki is a skill such a wimp like Coby would need to not be kidnapped again. So, he teaches him that as well. Coby's whole body is bruised when they finally arrive at the marine base but the boy's face is distorted in an equally insanely bright grin as Luffy's because he has somehow achieved some success at haki. Alvida and the others are still knocked out. Luffy supposes, when he made sure he hasn't really killed them, he used too much force.

Shells Town is weird. They flinch at the name of Roronoa Zoro but that's normal because Zoro sounds like a guy akin to a mythical demon and Luffy wants him on his crew for exactly that reason. They also flinch when the name Captain Morgan is uttered and that's kind of odd because he is a marine. Maybe someone actually realized his idea before him and Morgan isn't a marine but a Marine... ah, that sounds kind of stupid.

"Shishishi"

"Why are you laughing?" Coby raises his eyebrows.

"Nothing, nothing, just thought of something funny."

Coby and Luffy have Alvida and the other three guys with them and while Luffy gets those bounties, the younger of them is going with a letter to one of the office workers there. Garp's recommendation wouldn't be needed in Luffy's case but he wants to at least make up somewhat for his stunt.

Aye, Coby may not be physically as well as Luffy but he has taught the shrimp two important skills and the boy has enthusiasm.

Ten minutes later and nine million beri richer, he finds his pink haired friend even more beaten up in front of the marine base's entrance. "What happened?" Luffy's emotionless voice makes Coby flinch before he looks up with wobbling lips.

"They kicked me out before I had even finished my question. Some Captain he is, that Morgan! He held a freaking monologue about his greatness before asking what I was doing in his office. Then he whacked me with his weird ass axe hand. No wonder everyone is terrified if he's like that all the time!"

Luffy grits his teeth angrily and draws his precious hat deeper down to hide his murderous expression. "Come on, let's look for this Zoro guy and then..." there is a sharpness to his words which Coby isn't used to, "we're gonna get you into the marine."

"B-But how are you going to do that?!"

The straw hat wearing pirate balls a fist, holds it into the air and lets it blacken. "When everything fails, the answer is violence. Marine codex, paragraph nine, article four!"

Coby doesn't know if he should laugh or not because the apparent future Pirate King knows the marine codex better than most marines do but then he just sighs. They go on a Zoro hunt and promptly find him bound to a post. He looks like a demonic Jesus statue. Coby doesn't know what's up with this marine base. Are all marine bases like that? Surely not, they can't be...

Not minding the identity crisis his companion has, Luffy climbs on the other side of the fence which is parting him and his future first mate. Roronoa Zoro doesn't look like he has eaten anything in days and he seems thirsty as well as bloodthirsty.

Where had he put them -? Ah, there they are. Luffy's hand draws two slim energy bars out from one of his six shorts pockets, freeing one of them from the package and holds it in front of Zoro's mouth. They have yet to say a single thing to each other and Zoro isn't that trusting, so he starts to speak up: "Who are you and what are you do-" but then the energy bar is shoved into his mouth and he has to chew or else he will be deep throated by food.

When it's been fully eaten, Zoro wants to begin speaking again but there's another energy bar shoved into him. He didn't give consent to that, damn it!

"ARE YOU FINALLY DONE FEEDING ME, IDIOT?!"

The other decently muscled boy laughs out loud and tells the prisoner: "Yeah, yeah, I'm done. So, you're Zoro, aren't you? What's your thought on the Marine?"

Zoro frowns deeply. What's up with this dude? He doesn't seem stupid and he is strong. But at the same time the Straw Hat just appears, treats him like a fucking pet and asks ridiculous questions. He decides to humour the guy: "The marines are a corrupt organization full of weaklings without any will. They're just like a big pirate crew themselves and righteous as hell. Some of them aren't total assholes and I get paid decently for being a bounty hunter but that's about it. Why are you asking? You still haven't told me who you are, dumbass."

"Shishishi, I like Zoro already. Who I am, hm..." Luffy smirks an Ace-worthy smirk, "I'm a Marine. At the same time, I am a pirate."

"You're talking nonsense."

"Nah, I'm totally not. I'm the captain of the pirate crew called Marine. The name's Monkey D. Luffy. What about I free you and then you become a Marine... one of my kind of Marines, of course!" Luffy proposes, eyes gleaming.

Zoro's mouth has opened in awe. Luffy actually makes him want to be part of this shitty pirate crew just for the utter incredulous reason of pissing every marine ever off by carrying their name which is the name of a colour as well so they can't just put a patent on it. If he didn't have his dream, he might have just then and there agreed. Instead, he states: "I would but I strive to be the world's greatest swordsman so I can't just let my dreams be buried because I join some pirates."

Luffy looks blank. "As if I would try to bury your dream. I'm gonna be Pirate King so whoever's on my crew has to be the best anyways. Ne, Zoroooo, come oooon!"

"Alright but if you ever try to betray me, I will cut your head off." Zoro states simply.

"Shishishi! Sure. Come, we get your sword and then we'll burn half of the base down!"

The swordsman is alright with that. He has an open bill with Captain Morgan's bastard son so he doesn't mind destroying the base but... "Why only half of it?"

His new captain points to a boy who is currently casually standing in the air. "Coby there wants to join the other half we're not fucking up." And that's apparently a good enough reason. His new captain is a moron. He may or may not want a refund.

Luffy's finger points at the ropes and pierces them clear. But he puts in so much force the wooden cross just kind of falls apart as well. A little bit too used to the unnatural state, Zoro's body nearly tumbles down but his captain catches him. Luffy doesn't let go either, his arm stretches and tightly clasps the swordsman's upper body.

"The fuck are you doing? How's that even possible?" Zoro whispers shocked.

Grinning, the lunatic claims: "I'm a rubberman! And we can't really go in there or we will be chased and I would have to destroy the whole building. So we're going from top to the bottom."

Zoro wonders if there are more people like Luffy around who are just throwing out stuff like "Oh, by the way, I'm made of rubber" as if it's totally not something special at all. He accepts his fate and doesn't mind the handling as the Straw Hat is quite considerate and his embrace feels only like a too tight haramaki. When they're suddenly on the roof of the large building and see some workers completing an Axe Hand Morgan statue with the man himself supervising, it's a shitty coincidence.

"Who the hell are you, punks? Roronoa, is that you?!" Morgan spits out angrily.

"So you're Morgan? You're the one who hurt Coby?" Luffy's eyes become shadowed and Zoro feels overwhelmed with the killing intent rolling off of his captain's body. He hadn't thought that silly smiling boy is capable of hating somebody. Clearly, he's been wrong about that.

"Yes, I am the mighty Captain Mor-"

BOOM! The body of Morgan crashes into the statue, light grey pulverized dust is forming in a huge cloud as the Captain of the marine base just lies there, pathetically so. His axe is broken and splinters of it are seen all over the place but that's not the worst. There is a gaping wound in his axe arm as well as in his chest, scraping his lungs.

Zoro hadn't seen a thing. But suddenly Luffy had been gone and the marine captain was lying motionless. And now Luffy is back in the place he was before... in the exact same place with Zoro still in his arm. Somebody else might have not even felt him go away in the first place.

The green haired man stares up at him and asks himself if Luffy's truly human. There isn't any clear answer.

"Who's the second-in-command here?" Luffy grins. Some people shove a man to the front to face this Straw Hat devil. His name is Ripper and he is horrified. Zoro would be too if he were in his position. Now, he's just glad this boy isn't bothered at Zoro calling him an idiot.

"W-What did you do to my father?! YOU MONSTER, HEY, LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU!" Helmeppo cries in despair. His father, the almighty Morgan, is not moving a centimetre.

"Hey, Rip-guy, could you maybe bring Zoro's sword? He needs it."

Ripper blinks. Then nods and speeds away.

"That's taken care of, so..." Luffy turns around, lets Zoro go and slowly starts approaching Helmeppo. He comes closer... Helmeppo looks slightly uncomfortable... Luffy is getting nearer... Morgan's son is pretty sure he has just wet himself, glancing down he notes, indeed, he has... Straw Hat is nearly in front of him... Helmeppo doesn't want to die but his body is frozen... Luffy flicks his finger on the other's forehead.

"Boo"

Helmeppo shrieks like a virgin maiden assaulted by a dragon (he is, sort of, only it's Dragon's son and not Dragon himself), lands on his ass and directly in the wetness he has created.

Zoro chuckles darkly and Luffy "shishishi"s . None of the other men have dared approaching either Luffy or Zoro so they just watch the spectacle unfold. In another world, they may have celebrated seeing that the terror of Morgan's regime has been utterly annihilated but the shock is too scarring.

The second-in-command reappears with three swords. Those are all Zoro's so he takes them gladly, thanks the befuddled marine and fastens them to his hips again. Feels good not being without any weapons.

"Helmeppo, dearest..." Zoro's patented bloodthirsty canine features make themselves home on his face, "What did you say about Rika?"

"I-I will not to anything to her... please... M-Mr R-Rononoa... dontkillmepleaseiwillneverdoanythinginmylifeagainsoplease-"

A hand on his mouth stops Helmeppo from speaking. It's Ripper's. "Silence. Is that all you are here for?" he asks those two infiltrators, all traces of fear have left his voice.

"Nope. COBY COME HERE. WE'RE UP HERE!" Luffy uses both of his hands to enhance his voice and the floating pink-haired boy moonwalks to his friend. On his forehead is an x-shaped injury bleeding away. "Coby, Ripper. Ripper, Coby. Coby wants to be a marine and my grandfather wants ME to be one as well. I am already a Marine so I was here to ask Captain Morgan to take him instead. Well, aaaanyways... Wanna take him? He can moonwalk AND has Observation Haki."

Ripper doesn't know what to say so he asks the first thing that comes to his mind: "Your grandfather?"

Luffy nods, straw hat bouncing up and down happily. "Yeah, you should know him – vice admiral Monkey D. Garp. Do you still have the letter, Coby?"

"GARP IS YOUR GRANDFATHER?!" comes from all sides.

"Well, yes. I'm Monkey D. Luffy." the captain of the Marine Pirates introduces himself sweetly. Coby gives Ripper the letter which the man reads fast and then nods. "Good, now men, help cadet Coby. Good job on your part... which rank do you have?" he looks at Luffy.

"Shishishi, I'm a captain."

"Well, good job then, Captain Luffy!" They give Luffy and even Zoro (he hasn't actually done anything but alright) salutes and Coby hugs his friend thankfully before both swordsman and pirate captain leave them.

"You played them well. Captain Luffy... tche." Zoro grins at his companion when they are out of the marines' hearing range.

Straw Hat gasps dramatically. Some might have actually fallen for that as he looks quite naive by default but Zoro knows how wrong it is to underestimate Luffy. "I would never! Zooorooo, why do you say that? I actually AM a Marine and a captain... perhaps they are all just misunderstanding me." Both of them laugh. It's ridiculous, really.

Just as ridiculous as Luffy's ship. "The fuck is that?" Shudders run down the swordsman's spine as he looks at hearts and pink. Luffy is weird and he does unpredictable things... also he shoves things into other men without consent. Maybe Zoro should flee. Yes, sounds like a good idea. Only problem is that he would be captured within a yoctosecond.

As if sensing his discomfort, the captain "tsk"s. "Do you really think I wanna keep it like that? Its paintjob is disgusting and the galleon's figure as well. Next city, we're gonna see if it can be sanded. By the way, even if I wanted something with you, I wouldn't do it like that. I would seduce you slowly. You seem like a guy who wants a deep connection so I would give you little presents, manly presents though, and you wouldn't be able to not accept them as they could be meant platonic as well. Then I would gradually start watching your trainings and give you compliments. You'd feel obligated to watch my trainings as well. Then you would also start giving me compliments. It's a small line, Zoro, between friendship and relationship."

Zoro doesn't know whether he likes the fact that his captain could possibly seduce him if he wanted to do so. At least Luffy would be a gentleman about it.

Buggy

"Zorooo, why is this thing so laaaameee?"

"That's normal speed, dumbass."

"Zorooo, I wanna have meeeeat..."

A vein begins popping on the swordsman's forehead. Maybe they would have been better off going with a little boat rather than with this monstrosity of a ship but Zoro knows that it will be a short time until the crew starts expanding. They need a navigator, first and foremost, to ensure they're on the right course - later on, a cook, a doctor and someone smart to counter Luffy's... extravagance. His captain isn't dumb but he is kind of childish at times and doesn't like to think because it gives him headaches.

Or so he says. Zoro isn't entirely convinced.

After a couple of hours have gone by, the ship finally heads for the port of a small island. Hopefully, they would find a shipwright or at least someone experienced with woodworks. The pink is starting to annoy not only the easily unnerved first mate but also Luffy who hates this colour so much he has to restrain himself physically from punching the ship.

When they go on land, the first thing that happens is a girl running into Luffy. Three dangerous looking guys are on her toes.

"There you are, boss! I'm just gonna go now, okay? Thanks, bye!."

Five seconds later, the three clown-like guys lay in a heap of blood and groans. Zoro stretches a bit. It's been quite some time since he's had the pleasure of letting one of his blades roam freely. The girl introduces herself as Nami.

"I'm Luffy and that's Zoro. We're the Marine."

The orange haired girl lifts an eyebrow and asks unbelieving: "You guys are marines?"

Luffy grins and Zoro smirks. "No", the captain states, "We're the Marine Pirates!"

"Pirates?!" A disgusted expression flares over her face. If there is one thing she hates more than anything else it is piracy. Although this man with three swords has saved her, she can't help but feel wary about him and his companion as soon as she knows their occupation.

"Yep but we're not the "kill every innocent around" - type of guys. More like the "my idiot captain wants to be the Pirate King and I want to be the best swordsman" – type, you know?" Zoro calmly provides after a pregnant silence with Luffy crossing his arms and tilting his head, making the infamous straw hat go askew.

Nami sighs in defeat. They don't seem like they would attack her. She'd never lose attentiveness around them but she could at least prepare them something to eat. The captain's grumbling stomach tells her he hasn't eaten in quite a while (well, it's only been around five hours but the need for meat has resurfaced).

"Zorooo, I wanna have meeeeat. Nami, is there any meeeeat around?" Luffy pouts innocently.

The navigator sweat drops.

In the mass of collapsed houses they find an intact one. Luffy digs out an old red coat in a treasure chest and decides to take it with him. Mentally, he checks his list of "pirate things to do" at the point "steal from civilians".

Nami is shit at cooking. But she can look at the meat until it seems done and flip it experimentally. Luckily, Zoro and Luffy both have iron stomachs.

"Tell me – Is it true? Is your crew really called "Marine"?" the orangette asks genuinely intrigued, resting her head on both of her palms. It's been on her mind ever since their introduction.

Luffy, now with captain coat and all, stops gobbling down the food as he answers: "Yeah, but only until I'm a bit known. Then, we're gonna sort of betray the marines by naming our crew something else. Oi, Zoro, what name do ya suggest afterwards?"

The swordsman snorts in amusement. "How about the "Not-Marine"?"

"Norine?"

"Heh, we could be shitty and call us just "Nothing"."

Luffy laughs when a picture pops up in his mind of a high up marine calling out: "Be careful! Nothing is in front of us!" Would definitely be just as amusing as "Marine".

The navigator clears up her throat. "You're weird. Both of you. But well... I have a business proposal for you. I need a little bit of money and you need a navigator... If I am guessing correctly, you aren't really well on that, are you?" Luffy just nods in agreement, "We could work together until I have my required sum." She lids her eyes in a sexy manner but neither Zoro nor Luffy are influenced even in the slightest.

Nonetheless, the captain hits his fist on the palm of his other hand and yells: "Yosh! How much do you need?"

Smiling, Nami states: "100 million beri!"

"A HUNDRED MILLION?!" the swordsman shouts, teeth seemingly sharpened in a comical way, while Luffy starts drooling. "Hundred million... so much meat..."

"Stop dreaming about food! That's serious. What the hell you need that much for?!" Zoro asks, raising an eyebrow.

Nami huffs in annoyance: "None of your concerns. It's just that – money for me, navigation for you... and maybe... just maaaybee... I need help in stealing from Buggy the Clown whose base is here."

Luffy's thinking expression makes itself known. Honestly, now that Zoro actually sees his captain doing sheer acrobatics with his face he doesn't question how thinking can hurt.
After a whole minute stretching cheeks, eyelids and generally grimacing so hard Nami has to suppress a wince, it fades into complete neutrality when he states: "I don't know who Buggy the Clown is!"

One might have seen huge sweat drops forming on Nami's and Zoro's heads. Nami sighs but doesn't bother hitting the boy. "Buggy the Clown" she states, "Is worth fifteen million beri. He's one of the older generations, rumoured to have been around when Gold Roger was still alive!"

Luffy begins digging in his nose (somewhere, a certain vice-admiral is doing the same... family bonding!). "Fifteen million after so much time? What a lame ass. Probably can't even fight and has to rely on his men. Shishishi, when I think about the pirates in the New World... they would beat this clown with a single broken finger!"

The other two decide not to comment on that. They agree, though, to have this sort of contract between them.
Soon, they leave the house alone and the owner of it stripped of one of his finest pieces of clothing and thousands of beri worth of meat. Anyways, he will never notice it because in the exact same moment Luffy ushers them out of the door, a cannon ball hits through dozens of homes, and also the one they have been in just a second ago, leaving a path of destruction behind.

"Well, good that we weren't hit by that, right?" Zoro mumbles shook.

His captain's eyes are shadowed by his hat when he says: "Told you it's a nice time to leave. Saw it coming. We're gonna kick Buggy's ass – I hate it when people think they stand above others."

"Aye" the swordsman answers.

Nami stares in wonder at them. This boy... no, this man... he is insane. While Zoro hasn't caught the implication, Nami did. She suspects Luffy knew that this would happen but she doesn't have a clue on the "how" aspect. Maybe the captain with the straw hat would be strong enough to beat even Arl... no! She nearly has the sum she needs. She can't trust these pirates. There is no guarantee they would even want to help her. So she swallows down the impulse to immediately tell Luffy everything and silently walks at his and Zoro's side until they reach a circus tent.

Inside, they hear a cheery bunch of people partying away. This has to be their headquarters, Luffy thinks.
He beckons Zoro and Nami to wait outside for a moment and then strides in confidently after adjusting his hat.

A mass of pirates are drinking to the music made by some weird ancient looking guys. One of them plays a guitar, one is proficient on his accordion and two sing in rough voices a song about the "flashiest pirate captain of them all". Luffy rolls his eyes. How predictable! This reminds him of Captain Morgan. It also vaguely resembles the parties Shanks liked to participate in and for a second he's thrown back to his home town of Foosha Village.

Perhaps they're an okay bunch?

There's a clown sitting on a goddamn throne and he just stabbed one of the men next to him because he misunderstood the poor bugger. Not okay, totally not okay. A couple of subordinates wince when the body hits the floor but all in all people resume fooling around as if one of their own hasn't just fucking died.

"So you are Buggy the Clown, huh?" Luffy demands and all of a sudden, everything comes to a halt. It's not because he shouts it that they are shocked but because of the strength in his voice.

Music stops, men regard him with pure distrust. Only Buggy, the red nosed captain of this crew which not only resembles clowns in the clothes they wear but also in their shitty attitude, stays put and spares him a glance full of boredom.

"And who the hell are you?" the clown asks, clearly not amused.

Luffy's mouth corners go up as he says: "I'm Monkey D. Luffy, future Pirate King."

He's met with roaring mockery and insults thrown at his head. Internally sighing, he lets himself be dragged to Buggy's throne where the clown is flashily moving around his whole body erratically, mimicking laughing motions. What a disturbing sight indeed.

Buggy stops, wipes away a non-existent tear from the corner of his eye and inspects the young man standing in front of him so closely that his big red nose nearly squashes against Luffy's.

"I don't like you, Monkey D. Luffy. You remind me of that annoying redhead Shanks."

"Do I? Well, I guess it's the hat. It was his after all." Luffy says neutrally.

The blue haired captain stills and grimaces, apparently having a flashback. "That Shanks!" he spits out with hate colouring his voice, "He gave it to you?! No wonder you unnerve me, Straw Hat! Men, flashily get rid of this eyesore!"

"Gum gum hawk!" Before any of Buggy's men can attack Luffy he pierces his hardened fingertips into Buggy's chest causing the clown to cough blood and fall unconscious. "Just as I thought" Luffy states coldly, "Someone who rests on reputation. Mah..." he pouts when all of Buggy's other crewmembers take a step back as his eyes roam around, "...and here I wanted to have at least a bit of a fight..."

"What did you do to Captain Buggy?! I'll kill you!"

Luffy steps back just in time for a sword to rush past him. He puts his hand on his straw hat to keep it from being blown away and sends them all to their knees. There isn't anyone who is interesting. Their demeanour may be all big and flashy but the tiniest blast of Conqueror's Haki puts them out. What a waste, truly. Next time, he'll let his nakama deal with such overconfident pirate crap.

"Nami! You can plunder them all you want, I'll kick Buggy to the moon!" the captain of the Marines grabs the clown and walks out of the tent, motioning his temporary navigator to roam free. Then, he, truthfully to his statement, grins as he kicks the clown so far away that he vanishes on the firmament.

Beri symbols plop up in Nami's eyes as she happily trots over masses of knocked out clowns. Grandline map, money and food are all stolen in a single heartbeat. Zoro raises his eyebrows when the orangette resurfaces after such a short span of time with three huge sacks of goods dragging behind her.

"Insane..." Zoro mumbles under his breath, "They're all insane..."

After some villagers appear and the mayor thanks them (again, Zoro hasn't done anything besides standing in front of a freaking tent!) Luffy pouts.
"What's up with you?" Nami asks her temporary captain. Luffy groans and looks exasperatedly at his first mate who catches the notion and begins sighing.

Nami frowns and demands: "Honestly, what's up with... with... WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING?!"

Luffy has wanted to take the clowns' ship, really. After all, everything would be better than Alvida's vessel of pink death. But apparently some of Buggy's crew have managed to get away unharmed and have taken their ship with them. Now, obviously, they have to take the pink atrocity as there are nothing else that's halfway suitable.

"Eh" the captain of the Marine begins weakly, "That's... our ship?"

Nami finds comfort in Zoro patting her shoulder. "I know" the swordsman says, "I know"