Kelly takes a deep breath as he slowly opens the door to his shared condo. He tries to prepare himself for the state he'll find his roommate in. Over the last few weeks he's found Jay drunk more times than he could count. And when he wasn't drunk, Jay was just sitting on the couch staring at the wall. He walks in and sees a young brunette woman grabbing her jacket before almost walking into him. She mumbles an apology as she leaves. He throws his coat down on the chair and makes his way to the kitchen where he hears glasses clinking.

"You need help."

"What?" Jay snaps as he goes to take another swig.

"I get this feels like the easy way to get through things, the drinking and sleeping with random women."

"I didn't sleep with her."

"Hmm?" Kelly gives him a look of anger and confusion.

"I didn't sleep with her, I was going to but I didn't."

"Well regardless you still need help and I can promise you there's no answers at the bottom of any of these bottles." He gestures to the beer bottles on the counter. "When you're ready to get the help you need, let me know." Kelly concludes before leaving his roommate in the kitchen.

XXXXXX

A few hours later Jay is sitting on the couch, his head in hands when Kelly walks back out of his room.

"I don't know where to start but I do know, I need-." Jay starts and Kelly stops in his tracks and nods. "I need help."

Kelly nods and says, "You start at the academy on Monday."

XXXXXX

His days at the academy seem to fly by, but the nights are when his thoughts plague his mind. The idea of alcohol is just so alluring when he's supposed to be studying. Usually with a shake of his head he can push aside the temptation of driving to the nearest liquor store. But there's times where he actually gets into his truck and goes to the old brick building on the corner of the street. He's even purchased a couple bottles just to dump them down the drain when he gets back to the condo.

Somehow he gets to the day of graduation without so much as a drop of liquor.

XXXXXX

He's finishing up one of his first shifts as the candidate at Firehouse 51, lining up the hose properly when Stella walks up to him.

"We're all meeting up at Molly's tonight for Kelly's birthday if you want to join us."

He thinks about it for a minute while he continues to work.

"You don't have to Jay, but you guys have become friends and I just figured I'd ask."

"Thanks Stella, but I think I'll pass." Jay answers.

She nods. "Maybe next time." She concludes and it's his turn to nod. Stella walks away and Jay finishes his task before heading home.

XXXXXX

He stops at the grocery store on his way back to the condo. He's just grabbing a container of almond milk when he sees her. She seems to see him at the same time and a weak smile makes its way onto his face.

"Jay, hey." She greets bashfully, tucking some of her golden blonde hair behind her earas he walks closer to her.

"Hey, it's good to see you." He admits and she looks up then, seeing exactly how much closer he's gotten. They stare longing into each other's eyes for what seems like an eternity before she looks at his shirt.

"You too." She says as she tugs lightly the sleeve of his grey candidate shirt. "Look at you!" She adds with a little more excitement in her voice. Her eyes drink him in—marveling at the way he's grown out his facial hair and how his arms seem to be even more muscular. Her mouth becomes dry and she has to look away to calm herself down.

"Yeah, I uh, I owe a lot to Kelly." He mumbles.

"I'm glad you guys became friends." She mutters awkwardly.

"Look Erin, I know we didn't really end on the right foot."

"You were grieving."

"Still. I shouldn't have pushed you away."

"Maybe we shouldn't really talk about this in the middle of the supermarket?"

"Ok, well maybe we can talk back at the condo?" He suggests.

"Jay-"

"Come on Erin, just hear me out! Please? I'll even make you dinner." He pleads and he can tell she thinks it through.

"Ok, but I need to finish shopping and then I'll take this home and meet you there."

"Great." He concludes and then they go their separate ways.

XXXXXX

About an hour later she knocks lightly on the door of Kelly and Jay's condo. He opens the door quickly and Erin takes the outfit he's wearing now, admiring how the maroon colored Henley magnifies the muscles of his arms, chest and abdomen. He checks her out the same she is him before he lets her walk in. The smell of the dinner he's making wafts through her nostrils as she gets further in.

"Dinner is almost done." He explains as he passes her to get back the kitchen.

He wasn't lying. Within a few minutes the dinner he prepared is finished and he makes them each a plate. They make small talk in between bites and it continues while they do the dishes together. Then they move the couch and Jay turns on the hockey game for background noise. Both of their hearts pound in their chests as they think about what to say.

"I'm sorry." He finally blurts out. She looks at him in confusion, but she doesn't say anything. "I know I shouldn't have pushed you away that day. I just, I felt like I had already put you through so much—too much—and we hadn't known each other for that long. I didn't think it was fair to you."

"Everyone grieves in their own way. I was afraid to push back and lose you forever."

"You wouldn't have lost me Erin."

"I wasn't so sure of that Jay, you were slipping down a hole similar to the one you were in when we first met. I didn't want you to get in too deep."

"Yeah, but I was lucky to have a lot of people reaching in to pull me out. Like you." Jay states before pausing briefly. "Truth is Erin, even though we weren't together, you helped me get through Terry's death too. Every time I wanted to drink or drop out of the academy, I thought of you. I realized in our time apart how much I loved you and how I still love you." He admits and she looks at him in shock before she smiles and leans in. Their lips meet in a gentle kiss and then she pulls away a little.

"I love you too." She whispers before attaching their lips again.

They talk some more before turning their attention to the game that's already half over. She falls asleep a few minutes into the third period and he moves them around a little so they're chest to chest. He gently pushes her hair off her face and then kisses her forehead.

Later on, after he moves them to his room, he thinks about their future. He's grateful that the hole he dug himself wasn't too deep and he's even more grateful that she was the first one reaching in to pull him out.

XXXXXX

A/N: It's not exactly how I wanted it to end but I hope it was still enjoyable. Thanks to those of you that followed along and of course halsteadpd and queseraone for literally everything 3.