AN: I haven't been able to write anything in a long time due to reasons, but it was my sister's birthday the other month and I really wanted to write her a present, so I did manage to write this during my rather short summer vacation.

(My sister already read it a while ago of course, but I was, ah... trying to wait to post it until I had something to offer my Death Note followers... But then I figured, oh well, might as well just post it. Gotta be better than nothing, right? And for any of my Death Note followers who happen to see this, I hope that for that fact that I'm still alive and writing fanfiction when I can and that I do plan on returning to that fandom when I'm able will be some amount of conciliation...)

Possible Spoilers for the Devil is a Part-Timer! light novel/manga: In this story I include information about Ente Isla and especially Lucifer's history which is not included in the anime, and which I got from the Devil is a Part-Timer! wikia pages (with a few gaps and details filled in/made up by me).

However, I have read neither the manga nor the light novel, so it is highly likely that some of those bits that I took liberties with are not at all canon.

AN: Since this story is essentially a character study, it switches POVs between the three demons (and all three of them are something of unreliable narrators).

Anyways, my goal with this story was really just to write something that was kinda cute and sweet with Urushihara, Maou, and Ashiya that my sister would like, and also to try to make all the character psychology and relationships work for what I saw in/inferred from the anime while still going deeper, because I felt like the three main demon characters and their relationships could be far more interesting than the anime portrayed.

Hopefully I succeeded at this. At the very least, my sister says I did.

Posting this story just in case someone else out there enjoys it, too.

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This

"Dead people be like this," Urushihara said, and promptly crumpled to the floor, lying there motionlessly. He wasn't even breathing.

"Well," Maou acknowledged, looking at him, "that is kind of what they look like…"

"There's usually a lot more blood, though," Ashiya noted.

Alciel. Lucifer. Satan.

They're the Ente Isla's most powerful demons. They're ancient; hundreds and thousands of years old. They've seen empires rise and fall. They've ruled worlds. They've taken countless lives, both demon and human. Especially human. They've pulverized humans' bones beneath their feet and licked the hot human blood from their teeth, the taste salty and sweet. They fed off the screams.

Now they live among humans, living like humans. Like young, foolish humans who have no experience at much of anything, and can hardly scrape together enough money for rent. They starve, and freeze, and they pant like dogs in the heavy summer humidity. They struggle to remember that they need to eat and sleep and breathe.

They're living like this by choice. They could leave this world at any time—except that they can't. Not because they're not able to, but because it would be meaningless. Disadvantageous. Asinine. Suicidal.

They left Ente Isla in complete and utter defeat. There was nothing they could do. There's still nothing they can do. No demons have ever possessed so much power—so much blatant power, so much latent power, so damn much confounding power—and yet in this they're completely, utterly powerless.

So they're living as humans. In a world of huma

They're figuring it out as they go.

In a completely foreign culture and society, in a completely foreign parallel universe, as a completely foreign species, they rely on each other. They have to. There's no one else.

No, not just that—there's nothing else. Nothing else at all.

The Hero and the Church's Assassin want to subdue them, if not kill them. The Church and the humans of Ente Isla definitely want to kill them. The twenty-first century Japanese humans are even more demanding: they want them to be human.

They are not human. Satan, Alciel, Lucifer—they are demons.

They just want to survive.

For themselves.

For each other.

There's a reason, after all, that the demons Alciel and Lucifer are following Demon Overlord Satan even now, in this world of humans.

Maou and Ashiya were walking along the empty sidewalk back to their apartment when Ashiya stepped on a banana peel.

He slipped, and he would have fallen backwards had he not quickly turned the motion into a neat backflip, landing nimbly. "Phew," he said as he kept walking, looking over at Maou beside him and smiling slightly, "that was a close one."

Ashiya then walked right into a recycling bin that had been left out on the sidewalk, knocking it over and falling on top of it, bottles and cans spilling everywhere.

Ashiya just lay there on the blue recycling bin for a moment, his eyes wide.

"Ah," Maou said, having come to a stop. He was surveying the mess. "Guess we better pick all this up."

"I am sorry, My Lord!" Ashiya cried as he quickly scrambled up off the recycling bin to throw himself at Maou's feet, kneeling on the ground with his head bowed low. "I should have been looking where I was going!" His shoulders were shaking in mortification. "This is an unforgivable mistake that was perfectly avoidable and completely unbefitting of one of your Great Demon Generals. However can I redeem myself?! Please, My Lord, name any punishment."

"Okay," Maou said, bending over to pick up an empty plastic bottle. "Help me pick all these up, then."

Before encountering Lord Satan, Alciel had been the proud leader of the demon clan known as the Iron Scorpions, known throughout the demon realm for their strong defense and telekenesis magic, for their tough skin and the nigh impenetrable black carapace that protected most of their body. He had never been bested in battle. Not once.

And then Satan Jacob had come along, an unsightly, gangly, poorly-outfitted mess of horns and hooves and fur and leathery wings with childishly adamant red eyes, claiming he was creating a Demon Army and planned to rule as the Demon King.

Alciel had laughed at him, then. What could a member of a lowly goblin race do against him? Not to mention one so incredibly young.

Satan Jacob couldnt've been more than 100 years old a the time, Alciel already well over 1,300, his experience far exceeding this lowly goblin's, not to mention the vastly superior physiology and intellect of the Iron Scorpion race.

Goblins were known throughout the demon realm to be one of the weakest and dullest of the demon races, and one needed look no farther than the fact that this Satan Jacob had allied himself with a Fallen Angel to see the proof of this stupidity and inferiority.

There was no way that any demon could unite the warring factions of the demon realm under one king, and especially not this pitiful creature.

And yet Satan Jacob had not only defeated him in their duel, but had completely crushed him. This young, lowly goblin. It was the first time in Alciel's entire life that he had felt despair.

He'd wished for death, then—had knelt on the ground at Satan Jacob's feet and exposed the non-armored area of his neck for the goblin to claim his head as the trophy of his victory and release Alciel from his his feelings of mortification and utter inferiority.

But instead of killing him, as was the demon custom, Satan Jacob had offered Alciel his hand, pulled the baffled Iron Scorpion to his feet, and asked that he join his Demon Army.

It was the first of many occasions that Demon King Satan would bestow mercy upon the undeserving Alciel, and the former leader of the Iron Scorpions, tears stinging his eyes for the first time in his life, fell back to his knees and pledged Satan Jacob his undying loyalty.

Never had he encountered an individual as overwhelmingly powerful, as fiercely intelligent, as unbelievably kind as Satan Jacob—and he knew he would never encounter another.

It was evident, even at that early time, that Lord Satan was without equal.

In under 150 years Lord Satan had conquered demon faction after demon faction until all the demon races were united under his leadership.

He was truly Demon King Satan, then—never had there been a Demon King since the Ancient Demon King who had formed the first Demon Army and perished during a failed assault on Heaven, a legendary event that had occurred long before even Alciel's time.

Lord Satan's success only confirmed what Alciel had already known: Lord Satan was indeed the most superior being. In the demon realm, and in any other.

It was the highest honor just to serve him. Alciel would follow him anywhere, would obey his every order to the letter, would perform any deed and accomplish any task with the utmost devotion.

And when Lord Satan asked him to be one of his Four Great Demon Generals and his Master Strategist for the invasion of Four Continents, Alciel dropped to his knees and pledged that nothing in the world would prevent him from serving these duties to the very best of his capabilities.

His life was Satan's; body, mind, and soul.

And yet even with his considerable power and battle experience he could not succeed in conquering the Eastern Continent, could not succeed in defending Lord Satan's stronghold when the Hero Emilia led the entire human forces in an attack.

It was unthinkable. Unbelievable. Unforgivable. He was inadequate, utterly incompetent—completely undeserving of the honor of serving Lord Satan.

But he had pledged Satan his life, no matter the circumstances; and he would follow Satan anywhere now, even into unknown dimensions.

(It was Love, he would realize, after becoming acquainted with the Japanese language. The word was nonexistent in their native demonic tongue, the concept itself entirely absent from demon society, and Alciel had never before thought to express his feelings for Lord Satan as anything other than eternal loyalty. He'd never needed to. But the thought that he loves Lord Satan feels right, and he's glad to have the words to express it, even if just to himself.)

Even as humans in twenty-first century Japan, as Shirou Ashiya and Maou Sadao, he is his Lord's most devoted servant—though he is more unfitting to serve him than ever.

Without both his magic and his tough carapace, he has nothing but his intelligence and his devotion.

He does what he can.

When it became clear that he couldn't seem to hold a job, he started taking care of all the cleaning, cooking, and errands so that his Lord could focus all his attention on his work at MgRonald's. He manages their budget to keep them from starving. He does his best to make sure his Lord is as well-dressed, well-fed, and well-rested as their meager earnings will allow. He spends all his spare time at the library researching ways to replenish their magic.

It isn't enough, what he does. And it got even harder when Lucifer moved in as Urushihara Hanzou, taking nothing seriously and wasting their precious finances. For food they often have to rely on those two humans, Chiho and Suzuno, just to keep from going hungry.

He's woefully inadequate at living as a human. He hasn't been able to help his Lord in his plans to conquer Japan. But still Maou-sama rises in the ranks of the human business, all through his own intelligence and hard work. He's succeeding in this human world even despite being a demon from another dimension, and even despite Ashiya's shortcomings as a subordinate.

Ashiya hasn't even managed to find a reliable way to replenish their magic that would let them return to Ente Isla so they can take back the Center Continent from the humans, reestablish Satan's Demon Kingdom, and proceed to conquer the rest of the continents and enslave the humans in order to save the demon race.

He's been nothing but a disappointment, but his Lord still forgives him despite his transgressions and ineptitudes. Maou-sama still keeps him by his side, still relies on him, still smiles at him.

It makes Ashiya's chest ache, sometimes.

It's is all he wants, all he's ever wanted—to be able to serve his Lord and be regarded by him, just as he was in Ente Isla, and just as he is here in Japan. That hasn't changed.

He just wishes he were actually deserving of this honor he's been bestowed.

Maou and Ashiya walked into the apartment to find a long cardboard box which had definitely not been there before they'd left. Urushihara was nowhere to be seen.

"What," Ashiya blinked.

Maou walked over and crouched down in front of the opening of the box, looking inside.

"Uh, Urushihara…" he called into the box. "What are you doing?"

"I'm in a box," came Urushihara's voice from inside.

"A cardboard box?" Ashiya asked, baffled.

Maou's brow knit slightly. "Why are you…?"

"I dunno," came Urushihara's cardboard-muffled voice. "I was just looking at it, and suddenly I got this irresistible urge to get inside. No, not just an urge—more than that. It was my destiny to be here; in the box."

"Destiny…?" Maou asked, as Ashiya walked over as well.

"Yeah," said Urushihara from inside the box. "And then when I put it on, I suddenly got this feeling of inner peace. I can't put it into words. I feel… safe. Like this is where I was meant to be. Like I'd found the key to true happiness."

"Uh huh," said Maou dubiously.

Urushihara crawled closer to the opening of the box so he could poke his head out slightly, looking at them. "Does any of that make sense?"

"Not even a little," Ashiya informed him.

"You should come inside the box," Urushihara said, settling on his stomach with his chin resting on his folded hands. "Then you'll know what I mean."

"I don't want to know what you mean!" Ashiya cried, throwing up his hands.

Maou's brow was still furrowed slightly. "Urushihara…"

Urushihara looked at him, his gaze relaxed. "You want to come in the box, Maou?" he asked.

"One, I'm pretty sure there isn't room for two people in that box," Maou said. "And also, there was no way you were just staring at the box and then decided to get inside; that large box is actually made from taping together five of the noodle boxes from the noodles that Suzuno brought over."

"So what?" Urushihara asked, utterly placid. "Just 'cause I taped it together doesn't make it any less meant it to be."

"Right…" Maou said, looking at him for a moment. Then he sighed, standing up and making an indifferent gesture. "Well, I suppose even that taped-together cardboard box has got to be a more comfortable place to sleep than just lying on the floor."

If asked what he is, Lucifer will say that he is half angel and half demon.

It's actually a little more complicated than that.

What the humans and demons of Ente Isla don't know is that both the angels and the demons are actually scientific experiments in the attempt to create immortal beings.

The angels are the successful experiments. The demons are the descendants of the failed ones.

The entire situation of Ente Isla is due to his parents, the leaders of a group the group of scientists/magic-users that moved to Ente Isla after succeeding in achieving immortality when the humans of their world demanded the research be shared.

His mother is Ignora, now the leader of the angels and the individual worshiped by the humans as God. His father was Sataniel, the original Lord Satan of myth. He wanted to live peacefully with the humans; Ignora wanted to subjugate them.

Sataniel stole the Yesod Fragment from the fruit of the Tree of Life which had let them obtain immortality (taking Lucifer with him when he fled). In trying to create immortal beings through other means, Ignora started experimenting on humans. These failed experiments were the first generation of demons.

Sataniel found out about the experiments, freed them, and then led an army of them against Ignora (Lucifer, mercifully, was too young at the time to participate). It is for this reason that he's known as the original King Satan. He was never really a King, though—not like Satan Jacob was.

Sataniel didn't even lead the demons for that long; in the ensuing battle against Ignora and the other successful experiments, aka the angels, Lucifer's mother killed his father.

His father dead and the demon army defeated and scattered about the Central Continent, aka the demon world aka Hell, Ignora then took Lucifer back with her to live amongst the angels, aka in Heaven.

So while technically yes, his mother is the leader of the Angels ans his father was the original King Satan, but Lucifer himself isn't half angel and half demon. His father wasn't really a demon; Sataniel was one of the successful experiments.

Lucifer, too, is just another successful experiment. His mother experimented on him. It was when he was still in her womb, so of course he has no memory of it, but like the angels and unlike the demons he is perfectly immortal.

So really, the whole Angel and Demon and Heaven and Hell and God and Monster deal is all totally stupid. It's just a bunch of scientifically/magically-altered humans thinking they're better than other scientifically/magically-altered humans as well as just plain old humans.

Could anyone really blame Lucifer, then, for not giving a fuck about any of it? He's so sick and tired of it all.

In Heaven he underwent intense training, as would become the son of God, and when he was mature enough it was his responsibility to lead the archangels. Which basically meant he led the soldier faction of the angels in battle. He was esteemed and revered.

It was all terribly dull. It was so boring in Heaven that he felt like he was losing his mind. He had so much damned responsibility that he'd never even wanted but was forced on him simply because of who his mother was and it was all tiring and boring and and irritating and he didn't want it. It sucked.

He didn't care about Heavens' stupid goals. He didn't care about the other angels. They were annoying. He didn't care for their stupid imperiousness and stupid ideals, and they were all so serious all the time and they actually believed in all the stupid things they said and nothing was fun.

The only entertainment or enjoyment he got was causing chaos and destruction when leading the archangels in battle, and there wasn't nearly enough of that.

So he left Heaven and went down to Hell, because there the demon factions were all constantly warring and killing each other and he could kill and cause chaos just as much as he wished and nobody esteemed or revered him and had stupid expectations of him he was supposed to uphold and he could do whatever the fuck he wanted for the first time in his entire long-ass life.

He was far older than all the demons, even though he often looked much younger. His immortality was perfect; the demons had an imperfect immortality that let them live much longer than humans, but they still died. Several generations had passed since Sataniel's Demon Army, and it was hardly more than a myth that nobody really believed anymore.

A united Demon Army under one Demon King? Really? What a laugh. The demon realm would forever be a dark mass of killing and chaos. It was a perfect world for a jaded angel who held no beliefs and delighted in nothing but wreaking senseless havoc.

Lucifer started gaining a certain amount of power and influence over his demon compatriots, almost despite himself.

If it came with responsibility, he didn't want it. But whether angel, human, or demon, the masses were all the same—they congregated around those in power and proceeded to put them on a pedestal, admiring them and demanding things of them. And the way to gain power and come out on top in the demon world was through merciless violence and brute force. Lucifer had these things in abundance.

It was starting to get boring. He could kill whoever and do whatever, but what was the point? All that effort and yet no reward whatsoever.

Or at least, the only reward—power over others, and therefore responsibility for them—was an annoying one.

He didn't want it. He didn't want any of it.

He just wanted happiness. Amusement, diversion, enjoyment—something to ease the heavy, meaningless burden of existence.

Immortality. Why had his parents ever wanted it? So much effort and pain, and for what? An infinite length of time for expending more effort and experiencing more pain? It was stupid.

He was tired.

It was around that time that Satan Jacob found him.

Stepping over the dead bodies of those demons who had dared disturb Lucifer's brooding, the small goblin, so young that his tiny horns barely stuck up past his messy hair, had come right up to him and staunchly declared that he was going to unite the demon realm and rule over the entirety of it as its King, and he wanted Lucifer to be his loyal follower.

Lucifer had been intensely amused by the prospect. The little demon had seemed so earnest, so ignorant of the way the world worked.

And perhaps Satan Jacob must have seen how little Lucifer was taking him seriously, because he stared the fallen angel dead in the eyes and somberly proclaimed that if the Lucifer ever felt displeased with his leadership, he should feel free to kill him.

The determination and confidence in that declaration and the readiness with which the little goblin was willing to claim full responsibility not just for the entire demon realm but for any mistakes he might make made Lucifer pause, staring at him.

The little goblin held his gaze, unflinching.

This Satan Jacob was crazy, Lucifer concluded. Totally crazy.

He was the most interesting individual Lucifer had ever encountered.

So Lucifer had agreed to follow him. It would be entertaining, watching this little goblin try to conquer the demon realm. Lucifer never expected Satan Jacob to get very far; the only question was whether he'd get himself killed in trying to subjugate some demon faction, or whether Lucifer would get bored and kill the kid himself.

But then it became clear that Satan Jacob both could and would likely succeed, and that was even more interesting. The kid's mind was sharp as a scythe, and he was far more powerful than his appearance would suggest. He was not half bad as a leader.

And Lucifer never found himself dissatisfied. It was fun to follow Satan Jacob. He kept Lucifer amused and entertained, even sometimes genuinely enjoying himself. He might have been boggled, sometimes, at why the hell anyone would actually want such immense responsibility, but he was never dissatisfied with Satan Jacob's leadership.

Until, of course, the so-called Demon King lost the war against the humans and fled to the safety of another dimension. Where he then proceeded to live a pathetic and boring life as a human, not even trying to get back to Ente Isla and regain his reign.

No, the Devil King utterly abandoned the demon realm, utterly abandoned Lucifer.

So what if Lucifer had been reported dead? Satan Jacob should have known better than to believe that the fallen angel could be killed by the so-called hero and her so-called holy sword. The only reason hadn't rejoined the battle afterwards was because it had become too annoying, become far too much work, and because the other generals were falling and it seemed like the Demon King was finally losing his grip.

So Lucifer thought he'd just watch. See if Satan Jacob could pull himself out of this one.

Except he didn't. Wasn't able to.

Apparently even the demon prodigy had his limits.

When the Demon King abandoned everything and fled to Japan and started living as a human, he went from being the only individual Lucifer respected to the individual Lucifer hated more than anyone else he'd ever known.

The situation had looked hopeless, but so had so many others, and Lucifer had been prepared to be impressed—not disappointed. Satan Jacob had never before disappointed him.

And yet here all the Devil King's grand talk had gone to nothing, just like the humans and the angels—stupid, stupid lies. The world was such a predictably boring place. Satan Jacob had been the only one who had been able to change things up and make them interesting, and yet here he had failed, and the world was boring and predictable again, and Lucifer felt cheated. Betrayed.

When Olba had 'saved' Lucifer, after the so-called Hero had cut him down, he had offered to reinstate Lucifer in Heaven if he worked with him.

It was utterly laughable that this human thought he actually wanted to go back to that boring-ass place—he clearly thought Heaven actually was some paradise and so of course anyone and everyone would want to live there and so clearly any 'fallen' angel must have been kicked out against there will and want to go back more than anything, the foolish human—but Lucifer had agreed, never intending to actually go back to Heaven, because he'd expected King Satan to win.

But when he didn't, Lucifer's alliance with Olba turned out to be perfect. Olba wanted Lucifer's help in disposing of both the Demon King and the so-called Hero—and that was exactly what Lucifer wanted, too.

He was utterly dissatisfied with the Demon King's pathetic failure of leadership. So he was going to kill him, just as the goblin had said he should.

It was only right that Lucifer himself should kill his favorite amusement before anyone else did and rendered him even more unbearably pathetic. He certainly couldn't let Olba or the so-called Hero kill the goblin first—it would be such a boring, stupid, predictable, meaningless end, and yet everyone would think "Oh, Good has defeated Evil! Hurray! We knew it had to end that way!" and it oh so typically would be the falsest thing ever and Lucifer would probably laugh so hard he cried.

So no, he couldn't let that happen. He'd kill Satan Jacob first.

And he'd kill the so-called Hero while he was at it, too. She was one of the stupidest of hypocrites and Lucifer could never stand to see her lauded. It would sicken him terribly and he'd have to go on unnecessarily exhausting rampage of chaos and destruction just to make himself feel less like dying.

It would be so easy to kill them. So boringly easy, they being humans without any power at all. And Satan Jacob—or Maou Sadao, as he called himself now that he was stripped of the scientific/magical meddling of human DNA that had turned some humans into what became known as demons and so had reverted back to a human form—the 'genius' hadn't even managed to figure out that he could harness demonic power from the humans' negative emotions.

Even though that was exactly why he'd started the war against the humans on Ente Isla in the first place.

The idiot. Had his intellect completely left him along with his demonic form and powers?

And the task of killing them as powerless humans was so incredibly boring that Lucifer couldn't help but play around. Cause unnecessary destruction. Torture them a little. The fact that the stupid high school girl had fallen in love with the Demon King was too hilarious not to abuse. It amused him greatly to use the power from her negative emotions to kill the former Devil King.

He'd done exactly as the Demon Lord had said he should. Fulfilling that would be his display of gratitude for the years of amusement the goblin had provided him.

But Lucifer had underestimated Satan Jacob.

And when the Demon King (and Alciel, the foolish devotee) regained his demonic powers and let his intelligence slip past the stupid human facade he'd created, Lucifer had again felt that oh-so-rare stab of surprise and excitement which only Satan Jacob had ever been able to induce in him.

And when the Devil King had faced him in the air, putting on a show as he prepared to punch him, it had been all Lucifer could do not to burst out laughing. Hysterically. Delightedly.

He'd been wrong—the world was still somewhat interesting and unpredictable after all.

And it had even been somewhat flattering, too, how much power Satan Jacob used to punch him, knowing he'd easily survive it, that he was powerful enough it wouldn't do more than bruise his face—it seemed the Demon Lord had known that Lucifer hadn't and couldn't have actually been killed by the so-called Hero, after all.

He'd been on the verge of laughing, it taking all his effort just to turn his manic delight into a show of fear, and Satan Jacob wasn't even bothering to hide his pleased grin as he'd said to Alciel and the so-called Hero, "How should I punish him?" while his gaze, holding Lucifer's own, said amusedly, You did exactly as I told you you should, didn't you? I almost didn't think you capable of such a show of loyalty.

Aren't you glad you chose to follow me?

And it was a good thing that Satan Jacob finally punched him, then, because Lucifer didn't think he'd be able to hold back his laughter much longer, and that would have given away the farce.

Some things were best kept exclusive; what the others didn't know would only further amuse him.

Everybody but Lucifer was astonished when Maou took him in. Flabbergasted when Maou believed him when he said he could do all kinds of things with a PC computer and bought him one, even purchasing the laptop on credit, something he'd claimed he'd never do.

They didn't know just how long Lucifer and Satan Jacob had known each other.

There was a certain amount of trust between them, a certain amount of understanding—they didn't have talk to come to an agreement about the role Lucifer would play as the teenager Urushihara, the role Maou would play as his guardian.

Lucifer had always been Satan's Master of Chaos. Satan let him loose and reigned him in, directed his destructive tendencies where they would be best put to use to further the Demon King's plans, which Lucifer always found endlessly entertaining.

As Lord Satan's Demon General Lucifer had been happy—delighted, ecstatic, gleeful, maniacal, effervescent highs that seemed to more than make up for the lulls and lows, the irksome responsibilities and monotonous idealism. It was the happiest he'd ever been.

And yet, the malaise had never left him. Something inside him had been discontent. Bored. Tired. Exhausted.

Heaven was said to be a paradise, but he knew first-hand it wasn't. The demon realm, for all its freedom and excitement, hadn't been a paradise either. Lucifer hadn't thought that paradise existed.

Until he moved into that six-tatami one-room apartment as Urushihara Hanzou.

It's the first time in his life he'd ever been content.

He can buy whatever he wanted with a click of the mouse. All the info of the human world is directly at his fingertips.

He can play games, and sleep whenever he wants, and other people bring him food, and he can laze about and whine and complain about things all he wants.

He's never before had the luxury of that.

As the angel Lucifer, he was the son of God and responsible for leading all the archangels, esteemed and admired and expected to be the best of the best, perfect in every way.

As the demon general Lucifer, he was Lord Satan's left hand and responsible for leading a quarter of his army, esteemed and feared and expected to be the worst of the worst, terrible and terrifying in every way.

As Urushihara Hanzou, there are no expectations he had to live up to.

He isn't responsible for anything.

He isn't have to accomplish anything.

He doesn't have to do anything.

Being a NEET is everything he's always wanted and hadn't even known he could ever have.

It won't last forever, he knows. In fact, it won't last very long at all. Satan is already on his way to figuring out the secrets of the circumstances of Ente Isla, and once he does things will likely come to a head, and it will all be very dramatic and world-changing and yet at the end things will ultimately still be boring and predictable.

Satan Jacob will die someday, after all.

And anyways, Lucifer has lived more than long enough to realize that nothing lasts—something he's used to being grateful for, not resentful about, like he is now—and that this period of contentment can be more than a blink of an eye in the infinitely long duration of his immortal life.

All he wants is to be allowed to fully enjoy this time while it does last.

"Hello," Urushihara said, picking up his PASTA console and holding it up to his ear. "I'm using a real phone."

"That's your handheld gaming device!" Ashiya cried, irritated.

Urushihara lowered the PASTA console from his ear, looking over at him. "You got me, detective," he said. " Looks like I'm going to liars' jail."

"You'd be in jail if Maou-sama hadn't been kind and forgiving enough to take you in after your transgressions!" Ashiya pointed out angrily.

"Probably," Urushihara admitted, shrugging. "Too bad you have such a kind and forgiving Lord, huh?"

Alciel never liked Lucifer.

Firstly, he wasn't even a true demon. With his celestial origins, there was way he could understand the concerns of demons and the demon realm, and it was quite clear he didn't care about Lord Satan's goals.

As a general he was a terrible leader who let his troops run wild with next to no guidance or plan of strategy. (If Alciel used shrewd and economical strategy, Malacoda used acute fear and terror tactics, and Adramelech used overwhelming brute force, Lucifer's battle tactics were to create complete and incomprehensible mayhem.)

The fallen angel was even worse than Adramelech—at least the Ashen Horn, as violent and destructive as he was, took their war of conquest seriously.

The angel, on the other hand, treated it like a game. Often times, in the midst of an intense battle, he wasn't even leading his troops or fighting at all, but hovering high above in the air, hanging upside-down and laughing insanely.

And as if all that wasn't bad enough, he was completely irreverent to their Lord. He didn't bow, he didn't kneel, he wouldn't even lower his gaze. He would stare at Lord Satan defiantly, even occasionally contemptuously, and he would talk back to him and interrupt him.

And it was only Lucifer that Lord Satan allowed to behave in such a way—many other demons had been crushed for less.

When Alciel had once asked Lord Satan allowed the fallen angel to get away with such insolence, the Demon King had pointed out that since Lucifer was not a pure demon, he did not have the same absolute right to rule him, and that Lucifer, having once been an archangel, had knowledge of Heaven and the Church that no other demon possessed and which was invaluable to their endeavor. He couldn't risk killing the fallen angel or inciting him to run back to Heaven.

Tactically, Alciel knew that this made sense. There really wasn't anyone they could replace Lucifer with. But it never kept the fallen angel from rubbing him the wrong way.

After the report that Lucifer's army had been destroyed by the humans and the fallen angel himself killed, however, Alciel came to believe that Lucifer's celestial knowledge hadn't amounted to any advantage, after all. It was one of the only matters on which he believed his Lord's judgment to have been wrong.

Alciel was also convinced that Lucifer's undue violence was part of what put their Lord Satan's mission into such jeopardy that they'd had to flee Ente Isla. If Lucifer, like Malacoda and Alciel himself, had avoided civilian casualties and only killed the human soldiers who actively fought against them, aiming to make the humans willing surrender, rather than killing and destroying whoever and whatever he came across, then the humans might never have become so desperate as to rally the way they did.

Of course, he'd believed Lucifer killed at the time, so it wasn't like there was anything he could do about it aside from curse the dead angel in his head.

And then, after they'd been forced to flee Ente Isla and ended up in the country of Japan in a world without magic, Lucifer had shown up again, having teamed up with a member of the Holy Church, and tried to kill them.

A traitor. Ashiya should have known.

And he would have succeeded, had Maou-sama not temporarily regained his powers.

And yet Maou-sama, after defeating the angel, had taken him in to their apartment. Even though he betrayed them and tried to kill them.

Ashiya didn't understand it. He didn't understand it at all.

"Because he's my underling and my responsibility," Maou-sama had told him, ever the sublime Demon King. "He only teamed up with the Archbishop because that was his only option at the time, so it doesn't make sense to hold it against him. Besides, we have a much better chance of conquering Japan and Ente Isla with three of us than two of us. And his knowledge will be potentially invaluable if there's any further action against us from the Church."

And Ashiya couldn't argue with any of that. But it still didn't explain why Lucifer, now called Urushihara, was trusted with a computer and allowed to waste their precious funds.

And it doesn't explain why Urushihara is still allowed to treat Maou-sama so insolently.

And it doesn't explain why he's allowed to laze about all day and not do anything, being far more of a burden than a help.

Ashiya would've never thought he'd think nostalgically of when Lucifer was a demon general, but at least then he'd been willing to actually do work—now, as Urushihara, he refuses to put in any effort at all, always playing his game console or fiddling around on that computer, when he's not sleeping.

And here their Lord is working his hardest at his job to make enough money for all three of them to live by, and Ashiya doing all the housework for three people and trying to budget their funds to keep them alive, and Urushihara doesn't make money and he doesn't help cook or clean unless forced and he wastes their funds and he's utterly impertinent and ungrateful.

"Just trust me," Maou-sama has said. "Having Urushihara around will be incredibly beneficial in the long run."

And Ashiya trusts his Lord. He trusts him completely.

So he puts up with Urushihara, no matter how much the fallen angel drives him mad and makes him despair.

Ashiya has always prided himself on his keen intellect and his ability to adeptly assess situations, understand them and come up with the best strategies for dealing with them. This includes his ability to assess individuals.

But he's never been able to understand Lucifer at all. Why he doesn't take anything seriously, why he's so averse to putting in any kind of effort, why he doesn't seem to care about anything—and why he stays, even despite that.

But now that Urushihara has been staying with them in their one-room apartment for all this time, it's… well, force anyone to occupy the same room as someone else for that long and they're bound to see sides of each other they'd never seen before.

Sometimes, it's clear that Urushihara does care, even if the actions he takes tend to have negative side effects.

When he and Maou-sama had to take jobs that paid by the day, it was because Urushihara had bought expensive tracker devices, which had let them save Chiho and Emi and prevent the angel Sariel from getting his hands on the sacred sword.

When they got scammed by that company that had sold them five mattresses, a water filter, and a fire extinguisher, it was because Urushihara had tried to sell his hard-drive to help with the costs of the tracking devices.

Of course, there are also times when Urushihara pretended to be helpful simply to fulfill his own ends, such as when he sent them to the supposedly haunted room of the school in order to get his PASTA console back.

But then there are other times when it was clear that Urushihara really was on their side, such as when Olba tried to get his cooperation again but the fallen angel knocked him unconscious and then tied him up. And he proved to be more useful in that situation than Alciel did, having arrived far too late, much to his eternal shame.

So Ashiya has been forced to reevaluate the fallen angel and conclude that he does care, in his own way, even if he won't admit it and his efforts to help tend to cause at least as much trouble as they solve. And it's even more evident that Urushihara listens to Maou-sama more than he ever listens to anyone else, as irreverent as he is about it. But maybe that listening is his version of respect.

Ashiya doesn't know what it was like in Heaven. But after encountering Sariel, he can't help but think it must have been a truly repulsive place. And maybe some aspects of Urushihara's attitude make a little more sense, now.

It doesn't excuse Urushihara for how unhelpful he is and how many problems he causes, but Ashiya wouldn't want to see what would happen to him if he were sent back to a place that creates and is full of beings like Sariel, and he doesn't want to see Urushihara dead.

After all, there's the way that Maou-sama tolerates Urushihara, sometimes almost fondly, in a way that suggests he knows something about the fallen angel that Ashiya doesn't. Ashiya is aware that Lucifer was allied with Lord Satan before he himself was, and he thinks maybe there's something in the circumstances of their relationship to account for the tacit understanding that appears to be between them.

In any case, Maou-sama clearly wants Urushihara neither dead nor gone, and Maou-sama's will is Ashiya's command.

Urushihara still gets under Ashiya's skin, he's still problematic and he still doesn't make any sense, and Ashiya still doesn't like him.

But at the very least, he doesn't dislike the fallen angel as much as he used to.

Their six-tatami apartment would feel oddly empty without him.

Ashiya walked into their apartment to see Urushihara sitting hunched in front of his laptop, in the exact same position as when Ashiya had left several hours earlier.

Ashiya frowned. "Did you eat today?"

"Yes, I did," Urushihara said, not looking away from the screen.

"Did you bring the mail in?" Ashiya asked.

"Yes, I did," Urushihara said, still looking at the screen. "I meant to—"

"Has Maou-sama returned yet?" Ashiya asked.

"Yes, he did!" Urushihara said, clicking hard on something with his mouse. "I think he went out again though—"

"Did you get off your—" Ashiya started to ask.

Urushihara whirled around to look at him, demanding exasperatedly: "How many more questions are you going to ask?!"

Ashiya frowned at him, crossing his arms. "You should get off that computer, Urushihara," he said. "You're on it all the time. Why don't you actually help out for once?"

"Okay, well, can I go out?" Urushihara asked.

"No," Ashiya said. "No, you can't."

Urushihara looked at him blandly. "Then it looks like time for me to go out and seize the day," he sighed, standing up and stretching his arms up above his head, his back cracking.

Then he turned around sat right back down in front of his laptop, reaching for the mouse. "So I'm gonna eat Sugiya's for dinner and browse the internet on my computer until nightfall."

Lucifer knows that his problem is that he doesn't care enough about anything; and Alciel's problem, he knows, is that he cares too much about everything.

It's probably why they've never gotten along.

Not that Lucifer had disliked Alciel—at least, not any more than he had disliked all the demons, which was a significant amount, though still less than he disliked all the angels, and the humans, too. Aside from Satan Jacob, Lucifer had disliked everybody. They were boring, predictable, exhausting.

Alciel was boring, predictable, exhausting. He took everything far too seriously, reacting overdramatically to the smallest provocations. He reacted to the world as if it was set on affronting him personally, as if everything he perceived was the Truth with a capital T and a matter of life, death, and that stupid concept of honor that people always got so hung up on.

Lucifer didn't even have to do anything to upset the demon—he could just stand there not saying anything, and Alciel would act as if he'd just called the Demon King something unforgivable and heinous.

Alciel really was rather hilarious, actually. Lucifer appreciated that. It eased the monotony of being a fucking general.

He also appreciated that Alciel quickly became the Demon King's right hand and master strategist, which meant less work and responsibility for Lucifer. He could let the Iron Scorpion do most of the boring, difficult work—Alciel was more than willing to do it. Why not let him, since he was so extremely eager to?

Alciel obviously worshiped Satan Jacob. He would do anything for him and jumped at the ability to do so, he treated the smallest order with the utmost gravity, he unconsciously did the Devil King the favor of taking offense for him and demanding that his subjects respect him so that he didn't have to bother with it himself—he basically treated the goblin like some kind of deity incarnate. Not quite a God, the way the humans treated Ignora—Alciel's devotion wasn't quite so self-serving as that. It was more like an obsessive love, to be honest, which Lucifer found pretty amusing.

It was so easy for Satan Jacob to use him, and he was so willing to let the Demon King do so.

The most amusing thing was when Alciel made mistakes, though, because whenever he realized he'd made a mistake, he acted as if he'd just received a death sentence. Lots of moaning and sinking to the ground and clawing at his hair and declaring how unworthy he was, even though he was rather obviously Satan Jacob's greatest asset. Like, the Devil King couldnt've asked for a more devoted and useful follower.

Someone who was deeply in love with him and was intelligent enough to be an adept strategist? Yeah, Satan Jacob couldnt've done better.

As the Demon King, Satan Jacob had garnered quite a lot of idolatry. The demons had been waiting for centuries for someone like him, even if they hadn't been aware of it, and in him they finally found their supreme leader and icon. Someone with an ambitious dream worth living and dying for, and who had the power to make it seem plausible.

But most of those demons that idolized to him to such an extent were complete fools, and better for the dying part of that equation than the living part.

Certainly, in taking a demon with him when he fled Ente Isla, Satan Jacob couldn't have done better than bringing Alciel. Sometimes Lucifer wondered if the Demon King actually completely understood just how much the Iron Scorpion would do for him.

He probably did, though.

But yeah, back in Ente Isla, Alciel had just been someone Lucifer found somewhat amusing and whom he was glad Satan Jacob had around to stick responsibility on.

Now, in Japan, Ashiya is someone who is still somewhat amusing and whom he's still glad Maou has around to stick responsibility on.

In a way it's worse than it used to be, because now Ashiya really can yell at him and occasionally force him to do things, which is kinda annoying.

Overall it's a lot better, though, since now Ashiya's doing an even larger percentage of the work and Urushihara doesn't have do anything at all.

So he's perfectly content to let Ashiya lecture and yell at him all he wants; he's not going to lift a finger.

"Why did I have to come?" Urushihara whined, dragging his feet behind Maou and Ashiya as they entered the pool area. "I thought I wasn't supposed to go outside."

"I doubt the police are still looking for you at this point," Maou said, shrugging off his shirt. He was already wearing his swimtrunks.

"We couldn't very well leave you in the apartment while the flooring was being redone," Alciel added. He handed Maou a bottle of spray-on sunscreen. "Here, My Lord: put this on."

"I still don't understand why we had to come to a pool, though," Urushihara muttered, sitting down on one of the pool chairs and pulling his knees up to his chest. "I don't like the water, and I don't even have a swimsuit. So don't expect me to actually swim or anything."

Maou finished applying with applying the sunscreen and handed the bottle bottle back to Ashiya, who had shrugged off his shirt as well and began applying the UV protection to his arms.

"That's fine," Maou said, picking up a hulahoop that someone had left at the side of the pool and holding it out to Urushihara. "You can hold this for me, then. I'm going to jump through it into the pool."

"Do I have to?" Urushihara muttered, but he took the hulahoop anyway, walking over to the edge of the pool and holding it out so Maou could jump through it. "You're crazy, you know?"

Maou gave him a grin and a thumbs-up as he took several steps back. "That's perfect, keep holding it just like that!"

Then Maou ran forward towards Urushihara and the hulahoop.

And instead of jumping through the hulahoop, he pushed Urushihara into the pool.

"Wha—?!"Urushihara tumbled into the pool with a splash, still holding the hulahoop.

Urushihara's head broke the surface and he swam back to the edge of the pool, glaring at Maou who was grinning smugly down at him. "What the hell was that?" Urushihara demanded, lifting himself dripping out of the pool.

"You should've seen the surprise on your face!" Maou crowed, grinning broadly, and even Ashiya was smiling where he was standing a few feet away, just finishing up with the sunscreen.

"You're a demon," Urushihara accused sullenly, beginning to squeeze the water out of his hair.

"The King of them, in fact," Maou grinned, and jogged past Urushihara to jump into the pool.

Satan knows why Lucifer and Alciel decided to follow him, and he knows why they follow him even now, in this world of humans.

For example, Satan knows that the only reason Lucifer agreed to follow him was because he was bored and he didn't see any alternatives which were more interesting, and he is very aware that the fallen angel follows him even now simply because it still happens to be his most interesting option.

This doesn't bother him in the least; Satan knows that Lucifer has lived far longer than himself and any other demon, and that all the things he's seen and experienced have made him cynical and jaded.

Lucifer has never told him explicitly, of course, but it wasn't hard for Satan to figure out.

Even if he hadn't suspected that angels were perfectly immortal from what information he'd been able to glean from the mysterious angel who had saved him when his entire family and goblin tribe had been slaughtered in a conflict between demons, his suspicion was confirmed when he was able to observe the way Lucifer never seemed to age a day while Satan matured not just enough to catch up to him but to entirely pass him, and the other demons around him slowly aged with the passing centuries as well.

After coming to Japan and learning what the humans know about brain development, with human brains not fully matured till around 25 years of age, Satan can't help but think that Lucifer's immortality is why he still looks and acts like a human teenager despite being much older than both Alciel and Satan himself, both of them, even with their lengthened demonic lifespans, still being able to easily pass for at least a human of early twenties.

It's somewhat odd, because Sariel also had the appearance of being a man in his mid to late twenties, and Satan recalls that the mysterious angel who saved him appeared to have been around that equivalent human age as well. And yet Lucifer appears to be perpetually around the equivalent of a human eighteen-year-old.

Satan suspects that Lucifer has an idea for why this is, though he hasn't troubled himself to share it. Satan suspects that Lucifer knows a great many things (about angels, humans, demons, the strange and suspicious circumstances of Ente Isla) which he doesn't plan on explaining unless Satan can put him in a situation where he has absolutely no choice but to do so.

Satan learned a long time ago that Lucifer's answer to any prying questions from him is always a lackadaisical: "You're a genius, aren't you? You figure it out."

Lucifer has always been only unwillingly cooperative, but once Satan had figured out that the fallen angel was bored, jaded, and didn't care much about anything, it hadn't been difficult for him to secure the fallen angel's loyalty.

In fact (and this would have surprised many demons had they known, including Alciel), Lucifer was Satan's second follower. (Camio of the Pahalo Denino clan was the first, the bird demon having acted as a mentor to him and having taught him much of what he knows about magic and the ways of the demon realm.)

But it was from the stories told to him by the mysterious angel who'd saved him that Satan learned of the way humans had once united their kind, which inspired him to do the same with the demons; and so since it was an angel who had sparked his ambition, it was an angel he'd sought as his first ally (stumbling into Camio before that had been a fortunate accident), and he'd heard rumors of the fallen angel Lucifer.

He also knew that this fallen angel would be his best possible ally, tactically. The rumors about Lucifer said that, unlike demons (who almost always lived in large groups), the fallen angel roamed the demon realm entirely alone, and yet he was as feared as some of the greatest and largest demon tribes and clans.

So Satan knew that if he could get Lucifer on his side, he would have the strength of legions after having convinced only one individual to join him. It was very unlikely that he could have convinced an entire tribe of demons to follow him right at the get-go (power in the demon world was determined by brute strength, whether magical or physical, and Satan was still very young and was lacking in both), but he thought that, if Lucifer was anything like the angel who had saved him, he wold be able to get his support through words alone, and then he would have the power he needed to begin conquering the demon tribes.

As it turned out, Lucifer wasn't anything like the angel who had saved him. But it still worked out exactly as Satan had planned. Even better, actually. Lucifer was just as powerful as the rumors had claimed, and Satan was able to be even more confident in the fallen angel's loyalty than he'd expected.

As long as Satan was interesting, Lucifer would follow him. And it wasn't that hard to interest the fallen angel; Satan just had to defy his expectations.

And Lucifer's expectations were (and still are) incredibly low.

Satan's never had any trouble defying them.

In three hundred years, the only time Lucifer betrayed him was when he'd teamed up with Olba and tried to kill him, and Satan doesn't blame him for that. He'd essentially abandoned the fallen angel after all, even though he'd suspected that Lucifer wasn't actually dead; he hadn't had a choice, with the way the tide of the war was turning. And fleeing to live as humans in Japan couldn't have looked very interesting to Lucifer.

"If you're ever displeased with my leadership, feel free to kill me." It was one of the things Satan had told Lucifer at the very beginning, and it had had an even greater impact on the fallen angel than he'd expected.

"If you fail this, just know that I'll kill you even before they do," was what Lucifer would tell him before each battle or negotiation, his gaze dull and always prepared for disappointment.

Satan, especially in those early days, always took great pleasure in surpassing those low expectations. "See? I told you I could do it. Aren't you glad you decided to follow me?"

"Well, lucky you, Satan Jacob. Looks like you live another day." But for a moment those violet eyes would be wider, brighter, like Satan was the most interesting thing he'd ever seen, and if the fallen angel wasn't laughing there would at least be a trace of it in the quirk of his lips.

Satan had really admired and wanted to impress the fallen angel, when he was young, looking up to him like an older brother.

And then when he caught up to him, and then passed him, both in apparent age and in power (or at least, the power that Lucifer was willing to use, which Satan always suspected wasn't all of it), the fallen angel became more like a younger brother.

It was easier to issue him orders, and instead of having to urge the fallen angel to use his powers he started having to hold him back and prevent him from causing too much damage (the more responsibility Lucifer found himself with, the more bored he seemed to become, and the more likely he was to let his self-control slip). But Satan still took pleasure in proving him wrong. (See? I told you I could do it. Aren't you glad you decided to follow me?)

It was somehow refreshing that, even once he became the Demon Overlord and the entire demon realm expected him to succeed, Lucifer still always believed it possible that he would fail.

(Satan was sure that nobody had ever been as afraid of his failure as Lucifer was; the fallen angel seemed to lack any and all faith in the world, and it often made Satan wonder what he'd seen or experienced to make him that way, but Lucifer had never been very forthcoming with information, and especially not about himself.)

So Lucifer trying to kill him was far more a display of loyalty than one of betrayal; he was doing exactly what Satan had told him to, exactly what he'd promised he would do, should Satan disappoint him (the fallen angel is still the only follower he's ever given permission to try to kill him, under those circumstances or any other).

He's known Lucifer long enough to know that the fallen angel only laughs and causes destruction like that when he's angry, hurting, or both.

And Satan is aware that this was fully his fault, that for the first time he had met the fallen angel's abysally low expectations, had confirmed all his fears instead of assuaging them.

And when he'd regained his powers and put a stop to Lucifer's destructive rage, he saw again in the those violet eyes that look he got when he defied the fallen angel's expectations (a kind of surprised, almost perplexed, giddy delight), and Satan knew that his surmise had been correct.

(He couldn't keep from grinning at how hard Lucifer had to struggle not to start laughing, the way he'd always laughed after Satan's successful battles: an insane-sounding laugh of delighted, disbelieving relief).

Satan had no fears that his punch, powerful as it was, would damage Lucifer very much; he'd seen the fallen angel survive far worse (part of why he didn't believe Hero Emilia could have actually killed Lucifer).

And he had no doubt that, afterwards, Lucifer would willingly join him again.

He knew, after all, that Lucifer had a hatred for Heaven and the humans of Ente Isla (though he still, even after three hundred years with the fallen angel, doesn't know any more about why except that "They're boring"), and he can only imagine what Lucifer must have felt when Satan's demon empire was destroyed and he found his only option to be Olba's offer of reinstating him in Heaven (the only thing Olba could possibly have offered a fallen angel to get him to agree to an alliance).

And Lucifer's love of playing video games and dislike of doing work that requires effort doesn't surprise him at all, either.

(Lucifer's skill with computers was somewhat unexpected, but when Lucifer said he could do all kinds of things with one Satan believed him without question; Lucifer might at times purposefully understate his abilities, but he never exaggerates them.)

Satan would be lying if he ever denied that he's glad to have Lucifer back at his side again. Lucifer's been with him for over 300 years, after all, staying by his side through all his wars of conquest, all the trials Satan's ever faced since deciding he would become the Demon Overlord. They know each other better than anyone.

So yes, Satan knows exactly why Lucifer follows him. Knows it's because the fallen angel is demoralized and apathetic and world-weary.

But it's still satisfying that the fallen angel follows him; that Lucifer, who's seen who-knows-how-much and who could live anywhere with the angels, the humans, or the demons, finds Satan to be the most interesting.

It's just as satisfying as the fact that Alciel is besotted with him.

Urushihara was staring with lowered eyelids at his computer screen. Behind him, Ashiya and Maou were clinging to each other and sobbing.

"Ashiya!" Maou sobbed.

"Maou-sama!" Ashiya sobbed. "You can count on me!"

"Ashiya!" Maou sobbed again.

"Maou-sama!" Ashiya sobbed again.

Urushihara finally whirled around. "You guys need to take some relaxation therapy classes!" he cried, gesturing exasperatedly. "Get some scented candles! Take a nice herbal bath! Smoke some weed! I don't care, just do something, relax!"

Satan is very aware that Alciel agreed to follow him because he was in awe of him, and he knows that the iron scorpion follows him even now because at some point he became completely enamored of him.

The way Satan got the Iron Scorpions on his side was much more typical of how he conquered the demon factions than the way he'd convinced the fallen archangel. Demons lived in tribes and clans led by the strongest of their kind, and they would follow whoever defeated their leader.

Certain demon factions had different concepts of honor, of course. Sometimes Satan and his growing army had to fight an entire clan or tribe to conquer them (for these factions it was usually necessary to kill the leader in order to get them to submit), and others he only had to challenge the leader to a duel and then defeat them one-on-one (sometimes these duels required the death of the previous leader, sometimes they only required an unquestionable defeat and the leader would then pledge allegiance to him).

The Iron Scorpions were one of the dueling clans, and one of the ones who required only unquestionable defeat rather than death. It had been one of Satan's most challenging duels; not only did Alciel posess the Iron Scorpions' remarkable durability and exceptional magical ability, but Alciel possessed clear tactical genius which had allowed him to land more blows against Satan than he was used to receiving by that time (the Iron Scorpions were one of the last factions he'd conquered, knowing their power to be significant, and he was matured and nearly at his full power by the time he decided to conquer them).

Alciel's skill in battle had already caught Satan's attention enough that he was already considering making the Iron Scorpion one of his demon generals, but the way Alciel reacted to his defeat and the manner in which he pledged allegiance was even more noteworthy, and ultimately sealed Satan's decision.

Most demon leaders of dueling clans who would yield before death did so either in abject terror of him or in furious, resentful resignation of their loss. In both cases, they agreed to follow him because they knew they had no other choice except death.

Alciel, however, was different.

When Satan defeated him, Alciel had stared at him for a moment with yellow-brown eyes blown wide in shock and awe, and then had lunged to one knee, crossing his right arm over over his chest and bowing his head, and declared his loyalty with such vehemence and determination that for a moment Satan himself had been stunned.

He'd almost suspected a trick, at first, and had braced himself even as he'd spoken to accept Alciel's and the Iron Scorpions' surrender and allegiance and told him to rise, but when Alciel raised his head there was nothing but amazement and admiration in his gaze, and Satan quickly realized that he was in complete earnest.

As he would soon discover, Alciel was the most earnest and straightforward individual he'd ever met. And he still is, even now.

Alciel hides nothing. He says exactly what he thinks and does exactly what he means. One never need worry that Alciel is lying or being insincere.

In a world as full of back-stabbing and lawless powermongering as the demon realm, the fact that Alciel was able to become the leader of a clan and hold that place without any use of guile at all was remarkable indeed.

(His uncompromising forthrightness admittedly works against him in the human world and its culture of complex social rules and projected politeness where power is determined by money and red tape, but in the demon world, the culture and society of which is based on brute force and violent displays of power, it's a trait that earns him great respect.)

If Alciel could be said to have any flaw at all, it is his ingrained superciliousness and sense of superiority.

But this trait doesn't bother Satan in the least; Satan knows that Alciel has lived his life as the leader of one of the most powerful demon factions, making him one of the most powerful demons in the entire realm. Before Satan, no demon had ever beaten him.

All demons thought themselves superior to both humans and angels (humans were weak, angels inane). And in their world where physical strength and magic ability determined power and governed demon society, Alciel was indeed superior, had every right to believe himself so and behave accordingly, and no demon would have expected him to act any differently (to not do so would have been seen as pathetic and cowardly).

And besides, Alciel's pyramid of hierarchy placed Satan at its apex. It was satisfying indeed to have Alciel, who had lived for over a thousand years considering himself superior to all others, kneel down before him and call him Lord.

In the demon realm, at least, when Satan was acknowledged by all as the Demon Overlord. It's become somewhat embarrassing now that they're living as humans in Japan, as Alciel keeps behaving the same way despite the vastly different society, without any regard for what human witnesses might be thinking.

It's not that Satan doesn't still find it flattering. It still pleases him immensely (he still considers himself the Demon Overlord, will never cease to do so; it's who he is, who he's meant to be and what he's meant to do).

But it attracts suspicious attention, which is the last thing Satan wants. Despite what he might say about conquering Japan, he's there to lay low (and to learn as much as he can about human society while he's at it, picking and choosing what aspects to bring back to the demon realm when he returns).

And frankly, Alciel's continued worshiping of him puts him in an odd position, now, one uncomfortably in limbo between living as a demon king as he used to, living as a simple human as he's currently trying to, and living as a demon king as he plans on eventually returning to, and he hasn't figured out how to deal with it.

He always knew that Alciel was loyal to him to a degree that far surpassed simple loyalty. That Alciel had devoted his life to him completely and would do anything for his sake.

It went far past simply following all his orders. Alciel was never a blind follower; he wanted desperately to do what would be most beneficial to Satan, which meant that if he saw something that he deemed needed to be done he would do it without hesitation without having been ordered to, and if he saw a better method of conquest than what Satan was planning he would suggest it, and if he deemed that what Satan was doing or planning to do was an unnecessarily dangerous risk he would try to argue him out of it and suggest a safer and more surefire way of accomplishing the same end (for him, everything revolved on Satan).

It was a sense of entitlement that Satan would not have tolerated from many of his other followers, had any of them been so foolish as to step out of their place as his subordinates (his underlings are his responsibility, not the other way around; it was part of being Overlord).

But Alciel clearly had Satan's best interests in mind, and he was intelligent enough that his judgments were almost always right, so Satan allowed him the freedom.

(Alciel's devotion to him and him alone was why Satan had kept him by his side and appointed him his master strategist and one of his demon generals, but he would not have trusted the iron scorpion with running his kingdom; the duty of Deputy Demon King of the demon realm when Satan left to conquer Ente Isla was one that he left to Camio, whom he trusts more than anyone. Alciel might be brilliant, but his emotional state is unstable and too dependent on Satan.)

At the time, however, Alciel's intense devotion had seemed to Satan to simply be his due as Demon Overlord. It was useful to him and made Alciel his ideal right hand, and he'd never thought about it as anything more than that.

The first Satan had heard of the concept of love had probably been from the mysterious angel who'd saved him and the tales she'd told him of human society. But if she'd talked of love, he hadn't remembered it.

The only part of her tales which had caught his attention, and which he'd therefore remembered, were of the way humans had ended the constant wars and bloody conflicts between their facts by uniting themselves as one kingdom under one ruler.

It was such conflicts in the demon realm which had killed his entire goblin tribe, and all that mattered to him was improving the lives of all demons by ending such conflicts and ruling the entire demon realm as its overlord.

This goal was so important to him that he had overlooked the obvious problem of what would happen to the demons when all the realm's internal conflicts were ended, since demons, rather than surviving off food and drink the way humans do, survive off the magical energy they obtain from negative emotions. Without the negative emotions from these conflicts, the demons were beginning to waste away, and it was for this reason that Satan had decided to subjugate and enslave Ente Isla's human population, and in such a way that they would hate and fear demons. Their negative feelings towards demons was going to be what kept the demon population alive.

The more he learns about humans as he lives in Japan, the more he realizes that he might need a different plan. (This is another reason he stays, and the reason he still has Alciel researching if there are any alternative ways to replenish their magic other than negative emotions.)

There are many things Satan admires about human society. The fundamentals of capitalism are one of them. (He wants to observe the system in Japan so that he can establish a more civilized society in the demon realm, one where profit and trade can be used as a means to obtain power without unnecessary violence and bloodshed.)

The concept of love is another.

But love is more puzzling than capitalism, and he's not sure how, as a human rather than as a Demon Overlord, he's supposed to deal with Alciel's devotion.

From his experiences in the human world he's realized now that back in the demon realm he was a tyrant. Even if he'd had demonkind's best interests at heart, he'd still been the kind of person who had seen Alciel's feelings for him only as something he could make use of.

There must be another way to be, and he's making an effort to be more considerate and appreciative of his underlings (Alciel and Lucifer, and also Chiho and the other MgRonald's employees he oversees as manager).

But even if he could figure out the human way of responding to Alciel's affection for him, he's still Alciel's Lord; he's still planning on going back to Ente Isla to rule again as the Demon King with Lucifer as his left hand (his Master of Chaos) and Alciel as his right (his Master of Strategy), a dynamic which is vastly different from that of three young human guys sharing a one-room apartment and struggling just to feed and clothe themselves.

He can't forget that, ultimately, he's their King. It's his responsibility to take care of them and to lead them. Bringing in too much of a human dynamic of equality and companionship would potentially upset that. Overcomplicate things and make it difficult for him to do his duty as Demon Overlord (he's responsible for all his subjects; he could never belong to a single individual, could never devote the kind of attention to Alciel that the iron scorpion devotes to him).

So mostly he's been getting by by continuing to ignore Alciel's love for him, pretending he hasn't realized the extent of it, that he doesn't even have the ability to understand what it is (similar to the way he willfully ignores Chiho's feelings for him, except that with Chiho he tries as hard as he can not to encourage her in any way so she hopefully won't get too hung up on him and end up getting hurt, but with Alciel he makes no such attempt).

He tries to give Alciel what he can. He lets Alciel fuss over him, lecture him, care for him. Alciel has never asked for anything more than that. And he seems happy.

Alciel, and Lucifer, also—both of them are the happiest he's ever seen them.

Alciel humming contentedly to himself while he cooks or hangs up laundry. Lucifer smiling happily while lying in his cardboard box playing on his PASTA console.

The pride and satisfaction in Alciel's eyes when Satan eats the food he cooked and wears the clean clothes he washed. The way Lucifer laughs or smirks in satisfied pleasure when he finds something interesting on the internet or succeeds at some hacking experiment.

To live simple lives free of violence and bloodshed, constant vigilance and powermongering, crushing responsibility and expectations—it's something they'd never had never had the luxury to experience on Ente Isla.

It's something that Satan wants to make possible for all demons of Ente Isla, as much as he can.

(And maybe for the humans and angels, too. If he can. He has no idea how he would accomplish such a thing. He hasn't yet figured out how to even figure out what the root of Ente Isla's conflicts between the three species is, much less how to solve it.)

And Satan is staying in Japan for now because he wants to learn more about humans and the way they live, because tactically he'll have a much easier time reconquering Ente Isla if he waits, and because living as humans like this gives Lucifer, Alciel, and himself opportunities they've never had before.

They aren't very good at living as humans, admittedly: Lucifer's personality is still so discordant that he causes chaos even when he tries not to; Alciel still can't temper his assertive sincerity enough to hold down a job; Satan is still struggling with being a subordinate himself and working his way slowly up a promotional ladder that doesn't work by any of the means he's used to.

But what they have here in Japan, as little as it is—it's enough. They have each other, after all. And even Satan feels it; a certain contentedness he never experienced on Ente Isla, not even as Demon Overlord.

(Kings don't have peers; and so maybe Satan is indulging himself by staying here in Japan, too.)

When Ashiya entered the apartment, he found Urushihara sitting at his computer and Maou sitting at the table, shirtless and reading a manga.

Maou-sama," Ashiya frowned. "Why aren't you wearing a shirt?"

Maou looked up at him over the pages of his manga. "It's in the washer," he said. "I spilled some cereal on it."

"We bought you extras!" Alciel cried.

"Yeah, Maou, go put a shirt on," Urushihara said, not looking away from the computer screen. "You're as pale as bird shit."

"Don't insult our Lord!" Ashiya berated him.

"I ripped through my others those times I transformed due to regaining my powers," Maou explained to Ashiya, before turning to narrow his eyes at Urushihara's back. "And Urushihara, you're one to talk; you're paler than I am!"

"Yeah, but I'm wearing a shirt," Urushihara pointed out.

Ashiya sighed, rubbing his face with his hand. "I'm going to have to budget more money for your clothing, Maou-sama…"

Maou grinned sheepishly. "Thanks, Ashiya."

They're more content than they've ever been.

Even when Alciel rants or cries, or Lucifer complains or whines, or Satan's manager at MgRonald's threatens to send him to Greenland.

Even with the days of eating only cucumbers and soba noodles, and Emilia butting in at least once every other day to cause problems, and Church officials and blue-haired angels crawling out of the woodwork.

Their simple life in Japan can't last, Satan knows. At some point he needs to return. And with Hero Emilia and Crestia Bell around, and all the actions the Church has already attempted to take against him, it's unlikely that they'll be able to live in this relative peace for that long, anyway.

Even if he didn't want to return (which he does; he can't just abandon his kingdom and all his followers, he's responsible for them all), he suspects that he'd soon be forced to.

So when Lucifer spends the entire day on the computer or lies around obstinately refusing move, or when Alciel works earnestly on planning and managing their budget for months and even years into the future or clings to him and sobs against his shoulder begging to be punished for some perceived failure, Satan lets them. He doesn't have the heart not to.

Lucifer and Alciel are his underlings, after all. After everything they've done for him, he wants to at least give them this.

For as long as he can afford to, at least.

That's all he can do. But maybe that's enough.

In fact, it has to be.

He's the Great Demon Overlord, and it's his responsibility to do better by his subjects than anyone else possibly could.

It's why they follow him, after all.

Maou and Ashiya were standing there, staring at Urushihara.

Maou sighed. "Urushihara…"

Ashiya was pinching the bridge of his nose. "Urushihara, what is wrong with you?" he asked.

Urushihara rubbed at the back of his neck and laughed slightly. "You know, I really don't know…"

End.

AN: The truth is that I suck at humor and my writing tends to get unintentionally dark - so in order to help keep this story on the lighter side the interlude scenes are taken from/inspired by crack!vines that either I or my sister found on the internet. (All except for the one about the cardboard box - that was taken from/inspired by a scene from a conversation between Snake and Sigint in the video game Metal Gear Solid 3.)

And again, I have read neither the manga nor the light novel. All the information about Ente Isla (especially that concerning Lucifer's history) is taken from the Devil is a Part-Timer! wikia pages, and I then took the liberty to fill in some gaps and details. This story was intended only for enjoyment's sake.