Chapter 36 - Killer Queen Has Already Touched The Panic Button
Tokyo, Japan, 2 May 1986
"That stand should be my father's! Return it! Return it!" said Megumin as she latched herself on Aqua's back and start pulling on Aqua's hair.
"Stop it Megumin! There is no clause in the contract forbid me for drinking blood that was already spilled! Do you want your father's blood to end up wasted in the toilet?" said Aqua and this definitely give Megumin a stop.
"Well, Aqua is not in the wrong this time," I said as I scratched my chin. "Bloodstain is notoriously almost impossible to clean on tatami... We need to either replace all the mats or used professional cleaning service, both would be very expensive propositions..."
"You are filthy rich now, dammit!" said Megumin as she glares at me as if what I said was wrong, but at least, my statement successfully stops her from assaulting Aqua further.
"Anyway, it's still damn interesting to see that you get your stand that way, Aqua," I said while poking the mini-dogu version of herself with Whitesnake's hand. "Your stand..."
"My Divine Necklace!"
"When your stand manifested anyway?"
"I remember dreaming about pushing myself out of a cave full of teeth, and as I went awake, my Divine Necklace just flows out of my mouth..." said Aqua, and I quickly jumps away from her stand, as turns out that her stand is basically bound to her drooling saliva. "WHAT? My Divine Necklace is made of pure water you jerk! I could still purify all water that passes through my body! You could even drink it and not becoming ill!"
"That's still gross you idiot! Stand bound to saliva! This is literally the worst stand ever!"
"I tell you! My Divine Necklace is made of clean, healthy, pure water!" said Aqua as the mini-dogu figurine of her turns into a long floating Hagaromo before she nonchalantly slurped the floating water into her mouth. "See?"
"THAT'S EVEN WORSE!"
"EW! GROSS!"
...
Tokyo, Japan, 3 May 1986
Thankfully, nothing else happened last night. Everyone else except Youjiro-san was already asleep, and he agreed to keep whatever happened at Morioh as a secret.
Even the news about yesterday's explosion is a lackluster one, mainly because according to the news, nobody was killed. Great-grandmother did ask me if I knew anything about it, but we vehemently deny anything other than just spending our time inside Kira Family home.
It was another story, convincing the girls to not flaunt their stands in the open, but at least Megumin could be reminded on what Yoshikage-san already said yesterday, to keep their family ability secret from 'outsiders' because he didn't want the Speedwagon Foundation to come snooping on their lives. Assuring Aqua's silence is harder, but at least she agreed to just get to sleep when the sun is out and not meeting my great-grandmother face-to-face.
But just as I and Megumin arrive at our school... I end up looking nervously on a certain green ghost floating in front of the class. And before she could say anything, or the green ghost is able to look at us, I pulled Megumin away to a rather secluded part.
"Remember as well that Kakyoin could see stands too if he realizes that..."
"Why must I pretend not looking at that?" said Megumin obtusely. "You already said to Kakyoin that you could see stands without having one, why can't I..."
"Please... I can't be revealed as..."
"Oh yeah," said Megumin with a sadistic grin on her face. "But you definitely owe me one, this time around."
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...
"Ohayo Kujo-san, Kira-san..." said that certain Pinkie as we walked toward our respective desks. "Why are you two absent yesterday?"
"That's not your business..." I said while Megumin just rolled her eyes and sit on her desk.
"Owh..." said the pinkie sadly as he just returned to look around at the incoming students and teachers. "He can't really evade justice for this long..."
"Still in a crusade to catch that creepy molester ghost, aren't you?" said Megumin while she sat on her desk. "Are you certain that you could catch him someday?"
"Of course, Kira-san. I shall stay vigilant to catch the creepy molester who preys upon the innocent women of our school. He can't just stay hidden forever!"
"Well, good luck then..." said Megumin offhandedly as the school bell started to ring.
...
"And thus I must suffer, hiding my true power here, all because of you being such a trashy pervert!" scold Megumin as we walked back to my house after the school hours ended (early on, this is Saturday).
"So, what do you want..." I said in defeat as we walked through the public garden.
"Get me somewhere where I could start practicing my explosion properly!"
"Dammit! Your stand ability is literally causing a huge-ass explosion! There is simply no way in Tokyo you could..."
"Should I just said to everyone that you are the one behind that 'creepy molesting ghost' who terrorize our school..."
"Alright, alright... What do you want?"
"You could drive a car, right?"
"NO, I CAN'T! I'm still too young to have a license!"
"You are big enough to pass as eighteen years old!"
"I never learned how! My mom could drive a car, but even she prefers to use Metro or Taxi!"
"Ask your parents for one!"
"I am still fifteen! It's not like they would permit me to have one!"
"YOU OWE ME!"
"I can't! The only vehicle I could drive is my bike!"
"Tonight! Or else!"
...
And the night comes and everyone else was already asleep because it is almost 23.00...
"Ne, Jojo-dono, are you certain about this?" said Aqua as she opened the gate and I ride my bike out of the gate before she closes it again.
"You are the one physically strongest of us now, and I am more than certain that you could easily run and pull us as fast as average cars, right?" I said as I fastened the rope on her waist before fastening the other end on my left arm. All while Megumin sat on the passenger seat.
"I should be a Goddess or an ultimate being, not a rickshaw runner!"
"Shut up, you are my youkai servant, and I command you to run west toward the wilderness!" I said while referring to the still less developed parts of Western Tokyo, where there are wilderness and Megumin could hopefully set up her explosion without anyone really noticing.
"You are genius, Jojo!" chirped Megumin happily. "I can't wait to use my explosion ever again!"
"Why can't you use your car!" said Aqua while pointing out towards my family car that sits on the garage.
"Because I am not yet permitted to drive that, duh! I am still fifteen years old dammit!"
"But... But..." said Aqua as I start pulling the rope to sign her to start running. "If uncle Kars see this..."
"Yes, yes, you told us that you used to run hundreds of kilometers at night, it's time to prove your claim you useless Pillar Woman," I said while giving the rope another tug. "Remember our blood-sealed contract?"
"Uuuuuuuiii..." whimpered Aqua, but she apparently realized that she is indeed my youkai servant, and thus must obey my command, so she started running after that.
...
"Reminds me to ask for a motorcycle when I turned sixteen," I said to Megumin as we are literally pulled on speed comparable to one, even if it this was turned to be slower than what I imagine of Pillar Men speed.
Still, Pillar Woman muscle power is definitely faster than riding my bike. It does feel surreal that my half-brained plan to use Pillar Woman muscle power actually works.
"Why can't you just buy a rickshaw instead?" said Megumin as we overtake a (rather slow) car, that must think what the fuck happened to run faster than him in the dark of the night. "You could use Aqua for transport at night that way!"
Yes, Aqua does have perfect night vision, and aside of the flashlight I carried inside my backpack, we literally travel in the dark.
"Good idea..." I said while Aqua just runs us alongside the deserted riverside road.
"I HEARD THAT YOU JERKS! WHAT DO YOU THINK I AM? A HORSE?"
"JUST KEEP RUNNING!"
...
Tokyo, Japan, 4 May 1986
At least, we arrive in a semi-forested hillside way past the industrial area, and this should be where it would be safe enough for Megumin to unleash her explosion without making too much fuss with anyone else.
"Uhuuu... Huuu... Uuuuuuuiii... I never thought that Jozuma will end up enslaving me mercilessly like thiiisss..." cried Aqua as she laid at the side of the parked bike.
"Well, I'm sorry Aqua... But Megumin needs her explosion fix and I can't drive a car yet..." I said while tossing her a slab of pork, which she munched, but she keeps crying at that.
"Uuuuuuuiii..." whined Aqua while digging on the meat. "Why are you so meeeaaannn!"
"You said that your uncle Kars used to order you to walk thousands upon thousands of kilometers at night, and this is barely sixty-kilometer trek on a good road!"
"I haven't run like this for more than two thousand yeeeaaarrrsss!"
"Well, at least you could still run back to Jojo's house before sunset, yes?" said Megumin while putting her hand on Aqua's shoulder, looking at me as if this is my doing all along, without even telling her that this was started by her own insistence to test her explosion.
"You said you walked thousands of kilometers! Don't blame me for expecting you to really do your reported feat!" I said while the useless Pillar Woman ends up crying even louder. "Sssh, calm down... We'll go home at cycling speed, ok? The sun won't rise until 4.45 at the fastest around this time... More than enough time to go back home before that..."
"If you really want to travel fast at night, I could make you some vampire horses! Just don't ask me to run like a rickshaw runner again!"
"Why aren't you telling me earlier about this?" I said as the mention of 'Vampire Horses' definitely piqued my interest. "At least, as far as I knew, horse riding license is not limited by age..."
"Well, can I start my explosion now?" questioned Megumin as she pointed towards her watch. "If we stay here for too long..."
"Alright, alright... You could start..." I said to the explosion maniac while even Aqua stops sobbing and start watching her, as Megumin's cat-person materializes at her side.
"Oh, the dark shroud engulfing the sky, fierce blaze contained in mine power! The power of ages within my hands, collapsing the strings of the universe! In the name of the Crimson Demons, summon before me the pure power of the Killer Queen! Let the earth forever knew my wrath! EXPLOSION!"
"Ano... isn't this rather too... Anticlimatic?" said Aqua while the cat-person stand of Megumin formed the familiar cat-skull-headed mini tank that immediately picking up speed and makes a run towards the dark open plain laid in front of us. "That looks like a suicide vehicle of some sort..."
"I am indeed an opinion that you actually did not need that kind of useless chant," I said while Megumin just looked unamused towards us.
"SHUT UP YOU TWO! EXPLOSION!" said Megumin as she pressed her thumb.
*CLICK*
*BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMM!*
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"I'll give that 65/100, yesterday's explosion is definitely much better than this..." I said while Megumin and her Killer Queen started to fall unconscious. "Well?"
"I... Am... Still... Out... Of... Practice..." said Megumin with a weak smile just as she plopped herself unconscious into the grass.
"Well, at least she got what she wanted..." I said while carrying the unconscious explosion maniac back toward my bike. "Well Aqua, you could start pedaling this time, no need to go really fast this time..."
...
My watch shows the time is 2.15, and we already arrive back in front of my house. Aqua did say she pedals at her leisure speed, and literally carrying two passengers at her back, but that was still much faster than the average human pedaling speed, mind you.
Of course, everything seems to be perfect, the house light is still dimmed and everyone is still asleep. Perfect.
As we carried Megumin inside the house, however, I noticed something as I passed near the parked family car. Its engine feels warm as if someone recently used it...
"Weird..." I muttered while opening the door, and found that unlocked, which is suspicious because I definitely locked up the door before I went away.
Maybe I just forgot though, as I summoned Whitesnake and there are no signs of anything amiss.
As Aqua carried Megumin to her room, and I walked toward mine, however...
"What are you thinking sneaking away at night like this?!" said none other than my great grandmother, who apparently already waiting in front of my door.
"G... Great-granny? H... How?"
"What are you planning with the Pillar Woman? Why did she and your girlfriend suddenly become stand users out without us noticing about them!" said her as she dragged me inside my room and close the door.
"Hey... How did you know?! L... Let me explain! Let me explain!"
"You better explain whatever you have done right now, mister! I have seen everything!"
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