The thing about this whole mess is it's just so very, very dumb. There are a million and three ways it could have (and really ought to have) been avoided.

Gol D. Roger could have just not passed on the family inheritance. Rouge could have seen he was a boy and decided not to push it on him. Garp needn't have given him the shiny magical necklace, and Ace really didn't have to touch it and say the magic words, just to know what would happen.

But he did and she did and he did and Ace certainly did, for all he regrets it now.

Turns out that what happens is, there's a flash of rainbow everything, he suddenly levitates a bit, and actually cannot stop his body from moving as ribbons appear to strangle him and weights dig into his ears and his back bends in a frankly painful arch and a brand is applied to his forehead.

It lasts for just a bit longer than forever, and ends in the dumbest pose he could possibly imagine, one with a wink and a smile and pointing fingers that he will never be caught dead in again, not ever.

There's words on his tongue, too, words that want to be said, but what really comes out is a shriek.

It's bad enough that the top is really tight across his shoulders, but the gloves are also white and really delicate looking, the boots have a lot of ribbon but no decent sole or support, and overall, he lives in a forest and this is the least practical outfit ever for that.

And that's before he finds the fancy dangly earrings or the giant bow over his butt.

Really, it's no wonder he panics and runs.

He finally trips and stops a while later, on the edge of the Grey Terminal, and that's when he discovers that, for all he's been tearing through a forest in a white leotard, it's still spotless. The delicate gloves have been used to catch branches and hit cliff walls, and by all rights they should be shreds, or at the very least, dirty. The blue skirt is not even close to long enough to protect his legs, but none of the branches he hit left marks on his skin. And for all that he's never in his life worn boots with so little ankle bracing or so much heel, he didn't trip once because of them. In fact, he's pretty sure he's never run faster or jumped higher than he did just then.

But. There's something sticky on his lips.

He tries to tug off one of the gloves to touch his mouth, but it won't come off. Neither will the boots, or the earrings, or the crown-thing he discovers on his forehead.

And that's when he realizes that Garp didn't tell him how to turn the damn thing off.

When he finally calms down, he tries to logic it out. Saying the words again doesn't turn it off, he can't remove any part of his new outfit, and nothing can hurt either it or him while he's wearing it.

He's gonna be stuck like this for the rest of his life. His self-pity party is immediate and deep.

"Hey," the random kid perched halfway up a nearby trash pile says to him.

Ace looks up, scowls and says. "What do you want?"

"Nothing," the kid replies. "I was just wondering if you were the Moon Princess."

Ace groans and hides his face forever. "I hate my life."

"So that's a yes, then," The kid performs a few nimble leaps and then skids down the rest of the trash pile, landing by Ace. He looks Ace (and Ace's outfit) up and down a few times, then finally offers, "Mine's blue."

Ace nearly cries in sheer relief. He immediately springs up and tackles the other boy, who's a bit shorter and a lot dirtier than he is. "Please please please tell me you know how to turn it off."

The kid does know how to turn it off. He even tells Ace, after a long period of pointing and laughing.

"Just, like, imagine your transformation item, and then do it backwards," the kid says, which seems obvious and unhelpful.

But Ace will take literally anything at this point, so he grabs his necklace and focuses on the feel of it under his hand, and then imagines all the glitter and rainbows and ribbons being sucked back into the beads.

Warm wind surrounds him for a second, and then his head gets all spinny and his knees hit the ground.

"First time, huh?" the kid asks from a long ways away. "It's really draining, isn't it? Just wait til you start using your magic."

"Magic?" Ace, well, okay, whines. At least his head's stopped spinning. "I don't want magic! I don't want any of this!"

"Too bad." He sounds so unsympathetic, though. "No one asked us if we wanted magical powers, and also you're going to have to learn to collapse like a girl."

"What?!"

"Well, look! If you're gonna fight in a skirt, you're gonna collapse in a skirt, and if you fall like that…"

Ace looks down. He'd fallen with his legs out in front of him, arms supporting himself from behind, and unconsciously bent his knees when he sat back up. "...oh."

The kid sits down next to him in a neat tailor's-seat. "My name's Sabo," he says, dipping his top hat in greeting. "But I'm also Mercury."

"Ace," Ace responds. "I'm-no, I can't, sorry."

Sabo laughs at him some more, but also says, "I'm no expert, but I can show you what I do know about being a Sailor Scout."

Ace eyes him warily. "Does that include collapsing like a girl?"

Sabo grins cheerfully back. "We'll start there," he decides. "And then move on to the magic."

"Why do you even know this?"

Sabo's face draws up into a scowl, and he looks away. "That doesn't matter. Do you want my help or not?"

"Yeah, yeah. Sorry. Okay, teach me, then."

"First things first," Sabo says. "Let me tell you a story. Once upon a time, there was a kingdom on the moon."

After Ace has been bonked on the head and is listening properly again, he continues. "There was a kingdom on the moon and they were peaceful and happy and-no, shut up, seriously. Okay, so they were peaceful 'cause they had the strongest army, okay? And the pride of that army was the Royal Sailor Scouts, who drew their powers from the planets themselves. They were supposed to protect the Moon Princess, who could channel the power of the moon itself.

"But then the youma, who were chaotic and cruel and had been banished, decided to attack. They wiped out the kingdom, there was a whole war, yadda yadda yadda. Point being, the Moon Queen cast a spell to allow the Moon Princess and her Sailor Scouts to reincarnate to fight the youma and restore the Moon Kingdom. And it seems the Sailor Powers have been passed down ever since."

Ace waits a moment, but that's it. "So….how do I get rid of it?"

Sabo stares at him. "You can't," he says, voice heavy with the unspoken duh . "Were you even listening? You're the reincarnation of the Moon Princess; there's no getting rid of it."

Ace groans and falls over backwards. "Noooooooooooo," he whines. "Make it go away."

"You can at least hide it. The last Moon Princess was a pirate, I think," Sabo tells him, like it'll make him feel better. "Really pissed off the Marines, at any rate. They've got a standing bounty on the Moon Princess, so, y'know. Hiding's actually probably your best bet."

"Every time I think it can't get worse, you open your mouth and it does ," Ace says balefully.

Sabo ignores him and keeps talking. "Other places see the Sailor Scouts as a status symbol," and his voice is suddenly bitter, before he stops. "I heard that there's a Sailor Scout in the Grand Line, though, as a pirate. Sailor Venus, I think? So it's not like this'll dictate your life."

Except it will, of course it will. He's not even ten and he's already wanted twice over. "I'm gonna be a pirate," he tells Sabo, even though Sabo didn't ask. "I don't care who wants me or why, or how much money they put on my head. I'm gonna be a pirate and I'm gonna be free ."

"We're Sailor Scouts," Sabo says, and the bitterness is back. "We'll never be free."

They stay there in silence for a while, Sabo sitting and Ace collapsed on his back. Finally, Ace manages a sigh. He sits back up, looks over at Sab and says. "So? You gonna show me how to fight in a skirt or what?"

And Sabo grins, and then Sabo does.

Ace regrets asking almost immediately.

Magic, it turns out, is hard. Magic is annoying and unpredictable and Ace just cannot get it to work on demand.

Sabo does not have this problem. His problem is keeping a straight face when Ace says the words, does the pose, and nothing happens.

"You've just got to feel it in your soul," he says unhelpfully, perched on a rock. "It's like the same feeling as when you transform, all swish and warm, y'know?"

Ace does not know, thank you, and that doesn't even make sense . He huffs and falls back on his own rock. "I don't understand," he whines. "It's not working."

"You've got to really want it to," Sabo says, leaning forward. "You've got to need it, you know? Course, it also helps if you accept the moon magic into your soul-"

Ace makes a horrified yelp of denial and tackles Sabo, or at least tries to. Sabo laughs at him, jumps from the rock, and transforms in midair. It's Mercury who hits the ground behind Ace and who points and laughs.

"You really need to learn how to fall," Mercury says, and Ace makes a noise that is totally not a squeak, no way, and flips over, scooching over and back until his legs are under him.

"Stop telling me that!"

"I'd be glad to," Mercury says, making a bubbly flourish just because he can, the bastard. "Just as soon as it's not necessary."

There's a snot-nosed brat who won't leave Ace alone.

It's annoying as hell, and Ace does his level best to ditch him. The kid clings like a leech, though, and if he's not actively suicidal, he sure doesn't have much in the way of self preservation. The only lure that seems to be stronger than Ace himself is meat, and Ace soon finds himself reduced to throwing chunks of meat in one direction and fleeing in the other.

But the kid cannot take fuck off and die for an answer, apparently, and one day he gets himself caught, and then Ace has to go save the brat, of course, and then he's stuck with him. Well, they're stuck with him, more like.

Because of course Sabo thinks the brat is precious. Sabo likes Ace, so obviously his taste in people sucks.

Still, he's helpful, in his own way. He's at least a new challenge to spar against, even if he's not much of one; he can't use magic, after all.

Though he can't use his Devil Fruit either. Or even his own body.

He really sucks at fighting.

"Gum gum—" Luffy starts, halfway through their daily fights, and Ace snorts and steps just enough to the side that when Luffy yells "—Punch!" he goes flying right past Ace.

And bounces off a tree and off the ledge.

"Oh," says Luffy as he tips over, and Ace takes a second to blink because surely even Luffy couldn't be that dumb—

But no rubber arm comes shooting up to grab at a tree, and there is, in fact, a loud splash.

Ace stares at Sabo.

Sabo stares at Ace.

"He's really dumb," Ace says flatly, and then they both go skidding towards the edge as fast as possible.

The ravine here is deep, though, and the water through it is fast; Luffy's already out of sight. "C'mon," Ace says, already turning. "Maybe we can catch him at the bridge—"

There's a rush down his spine and the world slows behind him for a single thick second before blue and glitter explodes past him. "We can't catch up," Sabo—no, Mercury says. "The water's too fast."

But Sailor Scouts can jump higher and run faster, and yes, exactly, that's a good thing. Ace grabs his necklace and nearly trips over the words, he's going so fast, but he can't rush the transformation, and if it seems like whole minutes of twirling to him, he knows it's only a second or two in reality.

By the time he steps out of the pose, Mercury's got his goggles down and his hands in front of him, braced. He's muttering under his breath but Sailor Moon doesn't have time for this—Ace is already taking off, leaping over the ledge and trusting his boots to help him find grip on the rock walls.

They do, through magic or strength or what-the-hell-ever, and Ace is off, bouncing from wall to wall, eyes scanning every which way for Luffy. He's almost to the bridge when the water stops.

It just stops, stops flowing and moving, like a second frozen in time. Ace is in the air and he nearly miffs his next landing because he's too busy staring to check his position.

And then there's a rumble, a loud sound of angry earth, and the water starts moving again, stuttering forward and rapidly dropping in level. Ace pushes off the wall and jumps for the bridge; whatever's happening, he does not want to be caught in the ravine.

And that, it turns out, is a good call. He's squinting back towards the forest to see if he can See Mercury from here when a shadow falls over him from behind.

Ah, Ace thinks, turning around and looking up and up and up.

Well, he can't fault Mercury's logic, he supposes; making the water bring Luffy to them is a good plan.

But he absolutely can fault Mercury's execution, and he does, loudly and viciously, even as he catches a glimpse of black and red cresting the top of the tsunami headed right for him.

"I hate you so much ," Ace mutters, then backs up as much as he can, puts as much power as possible in the two steps he gets, and jumps, pushing off the rope railing so hard it unravels beneath his boot.

But he's already airborne, aiming for where he saw that flash of color, and he punches through the wave near the tip where it's thin. He has to keep his eyes open and the salt burns, but his grasping hands catch on oddly-smooth skin and he grabs hold, pulling Luffy up with him.

The water's taken most of his momentum, though, and he's no longer gonna clear the wave, especially not with all this extra weight in his arms.

He opens his mouth to curse and swallows seawater instead, which is just a mistake all the way around. It breaks his concentration just a bit, but just a bit is enough and the wave tugs him in and around and under.

It's quiet, is what he notices when he's underwater again with burning eyes and protesting lungs. It's quiet but quick and it'll probably kill him without care or reason, and that's almost worse.

He still manages to twist around til he's moving backwards so he can get Luffy in front of him, though; when they come down, they're gonna come down hard-

His back slams into something hard and the little air he had is punched out of his body as the water pressure sandwiches him between a wave and a hard place. What, he thinks, and it's too soon for the ground ….

There's an odd double pressure, like bars, like slats, and of course, of course , it's the bridge .

Only the bridge is broken, isn't it, because he snapped the rope; that means that when the water pressure passed, he'd be-

It ebbs and Ace starts to slip. He gropes for a grip with both feet and one hand, trying to balance Luffy against his body as his desperate fingers close around one of the ropes still intact and the wave rushes off without them.

Only now he's supporting both their weight by one precarious grip on very wet rope, and the creaking noises are kinda alarming.

"Sabo!" he hollers, dangling as loose as he can manage.. "Could use a hand here!" He hopes Mercury gets over here soon, though; the strain on his shoulder is starting to set in and Luffy-

Luffy's not breathing.

Luffy's not breathing.

It doesn't matter if his shoulder hurts or if there's water in his lungs or anything else; he pulls, scrabbling with his boots to get some leverage, any kind of grip, and manages just as his wet glove slips off the wet rope.

Well, that's fine. Just gives him two arms to wrap around Luffy, and he needs those to keep floppy limbs out of the way while he aims for the ravine walls and takes them at a controlled fall, just over to that rock so he can bounce up and over and touch down hard on the solid ground of the forest.

Luffy's not breathing and there's a fire in his heart, a denial in his soul, and words on his lips, so he lets them spill out.

"Moon Healing Magic!"

It's like his transformation, only not at all. There's swirls and twisting and a surge of energy in his veins that burns like sake, and he feels it build up until it's too big to hold. It explodes out in a silver shower of moondust, and he focuses on Luffy and hopes and hopes-

Luffy takes a deep breath and sputters, turning over and twisting to cough water up everywhere, and Ace lets the transformation go and collapses.

"Magic is exhausting," Sabo says behind him, and he looks up to check, but yes, it is Sabo, not Mercury.

"It's awful," he agrees, but Luffy is breathing so it's not as bad as all that.

"Yeah," Sabo says, coming to squat beside him, eyes also stuck on Luffy, who's sitting up and rubbing his eyes. "Hey, Ace…"

"Yeah?"

"You really need to work on the falling down part."

Ace looks down, blushes, and finds that maybe he does have some energy left after all.

The first time one of them transforms, after, Luffy doesn't blink.

"Waaaaaah!" he shouts, running up to tug on Sabo's skirt. "Hey, how'd you do that?! Hey, can I do it too?"

"I don't think so, squirt," Sabo says fondly. "You gotta be born to it, and you'd know if you were."

Ace blows out a breath. Of Course Luffy thinks it's cool. Of course he would. "Gramps would've said if you had powers," Ace says, and Luffy turns to pat his outfit. "No, what are you-ow, don't pull on that!"

"I want that too!" Luffy demands, and Ace huffs. Sabo's giving him a look, though, and Ace rolls his eyes but nods; just because Luffy doesn't have magic doesn't mean he can't have an outfit. They'll talk to Makino next time they're in town.

And they do, and she pats Luffy on the head and coos at him. "You're not a Scout," she tells him fondly, "but you can still be a hero!"

"I don't wanna be a hero!" Luffy pouts. "Are all the Scouts heroes?"

Oh, Ace hadn't thought of that. He turns his eyes towards Makino as she smiles at them, and he really hopes not.

"No," she says, "and yes. The Sailor Scouts saved the Moon Princess, so they were heroes, in the end. They protected her when the moon fell, and the Moon Princess pulled magic from the earth itself to save them. That's why we have such large oceans now, you see. But the Scouts had a mission, which was the protection of the Moon Kingdom; they didn't go around helping everyone for no reason."

Well, that's...not as awful as he was expecting.

"And the Sailor Scouts still protect the Moon Princess," she says, eyes on where Sabo's standing shoulder-to-shoulder with Ace. "So it was, and so it is."

Ace glances sideways at Sabo, his brother, his Mercury, and Sabo grins back at him. "Hear that?" Sabo says, nudging him. "Can't get rid of me that easy."

Ace huffs and crosses his arms, but that's fine; it's nice to know Sabo's not gonna be chased off by this awful destiny dropped on his head by an uncaring world and an idiot gramps.

"How do you know all this, though?" Sabo asks. "I mean, I got the lessons, like the rest of the potentials, but you're not in a Sailor Lineage, right?"

"Ah," Makino says, and winks. "That would be telling."

"Telling what?"

"That she's a magic moon cat sometimes," Ace says.

Sabo blinks. "She's-what?"

"Shh," Makino says, and Ace can almost see a tail twitching behind her, if he unfocuses his eyes the right way and touches his necklace. "Let's keep that just between us, okay?"

"There's another magic moon cat," Ace tells Sabo. "I haven't met him yet. He's off with Venus, I think."

"You'll meet him soon," Makino says, ruffling his hair. "Now why don't you boys come inside? I'll take some measurements and see about getting Luffy an outfit, and in the meantime, we can get you something to eat."

"Meat!" Luffy cheers, tuning back in and grabbing Makino's hand.

She laughs and leads them inside.

The skirt is red, to match Luffy's hat, and he wears it proudly. Unlike theirs, though, it is not magically resistant, and it's constantly having to get patched up and cleaned. Luffy doesn't mind, though, so neither do they.

"It's the outfit of the strong!" he proclaims to them, and they laugh and agree and let him do whatever he wants. It's not the worst reaction to meeting a Sailor Scout, not by a long shot.

Luffy's sailor outfit is his favorite, right up until-

Well.

"Ne, Ace," he says, standing on the cliff and looking out at the sea. "I thought the Sailor Scouts were strong."

"Yeah," Ace says, and if it comes out scratchy, well, Luffy won't mind. "Yeah, I thought they were too."

"I need to get strong on my own, don't I?" Luffy asks.

"Yeah. I think maybe we both do."

"Okay," Luffy says, and he untucks the skirt from his shorts waistband and holds it up, letting the wind drag it away and out over the ways. "I'm gonna get strong in my own way, and then stronger, and then stronger still!"

"Yeah," Ace says, because yeah, he'd've wanted that. Wouldn't he?

He watches Luffy grow up, there on that overlook, and put aside make-pretend moon magic to focus on his reality, a reality where they were one brother lonelier. It hurts like failure and sits in his chest like heartache, and the very worst part of all is how jealous he is that Luffy has the freedom to do that.

"The freest in the world," he murmurs, watching Luffy, and he believes, firmly and entirely, that Luffy can do that. And the least he can to is dedicate his life to clearing a path for that, which means getting stronger in his own way.

Luffy gives up magic and Ace shoulders the burden for both-for all three of them.

there's plenty of art of the Sailor Boys on jutm3h's tumblr. hold on, folks, this one's gonna get messy