Title: Badass Babes in Luxury Packaging

Summary: It was a regular night out at the bar when Emmett sighted two most extraordinary women, and it didn't take many words for them to knock the guys on their asses.

Pairing: Emmett/Rosalie Bella/Edward

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: 2, 106

DISCLAIMER: Twilight and its inclusive material is copyright to Stephenie Meyer. Original creation, including but not limited to plot and characters, is copyright to the respective authors of each story. No copyright infringement is intended.

~~BAB~~

"Dude, look over there," I said and nudged Ed with my elbow.

"What the hell, man. Take it easy with that elbow, will you?" he complained and moved away.

"Shut up and look," I told him again and not so subtly nodded toward the two women sitting by the bar. "Seriously, those two are hot."

Ed rolled his eyes. "Em, you think everything on two legs is hot," he pointed out but finally looked at the women. "Although, I won't disagree with you this time." He took a sip of his beer. "Too bad both of them are out of our league," he concluded and, once again, looked the other way.

"What? Are you shitting me? You just gonna let those two pass you by?" I asked him incredulously. "You won't even try?"

He sighed as if I were missing a huge point. "You said it yourself, Em. They're hot, which means they probably have boyfriends. How long do you think two girls like that stay single, huh?"

I grinned at him. "Won't know until we ask 'em, will we?"

He was shaking his head before I'd even finished the sentence. "Uh uh, forget it. I'm not going to be your wingman this time. I'm tired of making a fool of myself on your behalf."

"Don't worry about that. You do that perfectly on your own, man," I said and laughed. "But seriously, I won't be able to sleep tonight if I don't at least give it a shot."

"Then go over there yourself," he said with a huff as he'd started to feel irritated.

"All right," I conceded. "But you know I'll talk about you as an icebreaker. That's the rules."

He grimaced at me. "Dammit, Em! You and your fucking rules. Sometimes, I question why I put up with your ass."

"Because it's such a fine ass to put up with," I retorted with a wink, and he shoved me out from our booth.

"Shut up."

Despite the teasing, he still followed me as I made my way across the dance floor toward the bar where the two women sat. I hadn't expected anything else either. Edward was always my wingman, just as I was always his. Although, I did take advantage of that more often than he did.

As we approached, the blonde one of the pair turned around, and I was pierced by hazel eyes. She obviously noticed we were on our way toward them, and her expression turned curious before she turned back to her friend to alert her as well. The other girl, the brunette, leaned around the blonde to see what she was talking about, and I couldn't hold in my chuckle when I noticed her checking out Ed without shame.

Unless Ed had already decided on the blonde, there was no doubt in my mind he'd get laid tonight if the look in the brunette's eyes was any indication.

I reached them first, and I leaned on the bar, turning toward them. "Hello, ladies. How's the night treating you so far?" I asked with a smile. I'd been told I had a charming smile, and I used it whenever I got the chance.

The girls exchanged a look and smiled secretly toward each other. There was something different about these two that I didn't usually encounter with other girls. I liked it, though.

The blonde brought her drink up, and dark red lips puckered up around the colorful straw. The visual was insanely erotic, and I found myself being mesmerized. While that happened, the brunette answered me.

"The night has treated us just fine until now," she started, and my stomach dropped. She was going to reject us. "Now it's downright spoiling us by offering us fresh meat."

My eyes widened, and my chin literally dropped. Her answer was the last I had ever anticipated. I looked at Ed, and he wasn't much better off. He was gaping stupidly as well, and it caused the girls to laugh.

The brunette offered her hand to me first since I was closest. "I'm Bella. This ten-pointer next to me is Rosalie. What about you?"

Still awed by the one-of-a-kind encounter, I had to swallow to find my voice again. "Uh, I'm Emmett. This is Edward," I replied and pointed awkwardly at Ed. All my suaveness had completely disappeared, and I knew I looked like a fool, but my body had just stopped listening to my brain.

Bella turned to Ed and held her hand out to him as well. "Nice to meet you, Edward. I'd offer you a seat, but there's not much room here at the bar," she continued apologetically.

"We have a booth," Ed threw out. "If you'd like to join us."

Another look was exchanged between Bella and Rosalie—the names fit them—and then both of them smiled with satisfaction.

"We'd love to," Bella answered for both of them. Rosalie had yet to utter a word, and it was killing me. I wondered what her voice sounded like.

Ed and I led them to our booth, and neither of them hesitated to show who they had zeroed in on. Bella physically pulled Ed down next to her, and Rosalie gave me a look that said it all. It made me strangely nervous because, suddenly, I felt I wasn't the one hunting.

For once feeling very self-conscious, I cleared my throat. "So, Rosalie, you haven't said a word yet."

She shrugged.

"Are you not much of a talker?" I pushed.

She smiled. "Oh, I am, but I know Bella's better at reeling them in, hook, line, and sinker," she replied before letting out a hoarse chuckle that shot straight through my body to my dick.

"My dad was a fisherman, after all," Bella answered to that and turned to Ed. "Tell me about yourself."

I tuned them out. I was more focused on Rosalie anyway. "You two seem to know each other quite well. Have you been friends long?"

"Not at all. We work together and met about six months ago."

"Really?" I asked. "I would have thought you two grew up together or something."

Another shrug. "Our work demands trust between each other, and I guess you could say that Bella and I are kindred spirits, if you believe in that sort of thing that is," she said and took another sip of her drink, those dark lips once again closing around that straw in such an erotic way.

I swallowed again. My mind was in the gutter, and it was already weaving outrageous fantasies that involved this woman before me, but I knew, rationally, that a woman like her wouldn't be fooled by a few well-phrased sentences.

"What do you do?"

"We're RSOs and instructors at Eastside Shooting Range."

"Fuck me, you're joking," I exclaimed without thinking.

She laughed at my reaction and didn't appear at all offended, which only made me like her even more. "I am dead serious. Both of us are huge gun enthusiasts."

"Wow," I said, thoroughly impressed. "That's cool, but I don't know whether to be turned on or really scared of you now." I was only half-honest and half-joking.

"Don't worry. We only shoot guys with sucky pick-up lines," she said with a smirk. "So far, you've done pretty well. At least, you didn't fire off one of those 'did it hurt?' lines, so that gives you major kudos."

I let out a nervous laugh because that was one of my regular lines. I knew it was cheesy and rarely worked, but I often used it as an icebreaker before getting into the real art of flirting.

In order to hide my nerves, I looked over at the pair across the table, and I was shocked to see that Bella had already succeeded in getting Ed to open up. He was usually a rather closed-off guy with strangers, but now, as Bella had turned her entire body toward him and supported her elbow on the back of the booth seat, he was talking without restraint. Bella was raptly listening, giving him all her attention while also playing with the necklace around her throat.

"How did she do that?" I mumbled to myself but, apparently, not quiet enough because Rosalie heard me, and she leaned forward to whisper in my ear.

"Bella has a degree in Rhetorical Psychology and Body Language. If she can't get a person to talk, no one can."

I shivered at having her mouth so close to my ear, but I turned back toward her anyway in an attempt to hide how much she affected me. "And what about you? What did you major in?" It was a boring question that I had never asked my previous conquests, but these girls somehow made everything seem sexual.

What had I gotten us into? Had we gotten in over our heads?

"Movement Science. Fitness is another one of my passions."

"I can see that," I commented and immediately wanted to facepalm myself. What the hell was wrong with me? Why had I been rendered into this stupid, babbling baboon?

Rosalie only continued to smile at me. "Thank you for the compliment." She drank the last of her drink and turned to her friend across the table. "My drink's out and I need to go to the bathroom. Come with me."

Without even questioning it, Bella stood up and took a step over Ed's legs, and her ass was right in his face. His eyes were kind of glossed over, and he didn't even try to be subtle as he ogled her while she and Rosalie headed toward the ladies' room.

"Holy shit," he breathed out.

"Right?" I agreed equally as breathless.

He turned to me. "Em, I think I'm in love."

"That makes two of us."

"Did Rosalie tell you what they're working with?" he asked, and I nodded at him with wide eyes.

"Hell, yeah! This shit is insane. I didn't even know girls like them existed in the real world."

"Me neither."

Both of us were staring at the corridor that led to the bathrooms, so we noticed when something appeared to draw people in that direction. It made us curious, and we rose from our booth to check out what was happening.

As soon as we rounded the corner of the corridor, we saw what the situation was about, but it wasn't what we expected.

"Damn," Ed let out.

"You're telling me," I said.

In front of us, Bella had a guy pressed up against the wall, his face pushed into the concrete and his arm pulled behind his back in an arm lock that could dislocate his shoulder with a single twist.

Rosalie was hissing into his face, her hazel eyes glowing with fury, and we were just in time to catch her last words.

"If you ever touch a woman without her consent again, my friend and I will hunt you down and gladly break both of your hands. You got me?"

"Fuck!" the guy exclaimed when Bella pulled his arm up another inch. "Yeah, okay. Shit, just let go of me, please," he pleaded.

Bella did so after another silent exchange between her and Rosalie, and as the guy fled, Rosalie yelled after him. "Remember that women talk! We'll know if you break your promise, believe me!"

Ed and I carefully approached the girls, and when they saw us, they only smiled.

"Are you okay?" Ed asked. "Did that guy touch you?"

Bella hooked her arm around his. "Don't worry; it wasn't us but another girl in the bathroom line. He'll think twice before he grabs a woman's ass unsolicited." She started to lead him back out of the corridor. "Do you really want to stay here or would you rather go somewhere else?" she asked suggestively, and Ed was once again rendered speechless.

"I hope we didn't scare you too much," Rosalie said to garner my attention away from my disappearing buddy and the girl who was constantly outwitting him.

Maybe he had been right from the start? Maybe they were out of our league?

I turned to Rosalie. "Just a little bit," I told her honestly. "But I also have mad respect for you."

"Glad to hear that," she replied before she mimicked Bella and hooked her arm around mine. "Now, we've been talking about me an awful lot. I believe it's your turn."