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Hope: The Truest Treasure
Nine
Lance touched the edges of his hair, cut short and back to a more familiar length. Yet, upon looking in the mirror, it wasn't so familiar anymore.
It was his eyes, he decided. Hope may have restored life to them and the relatively peaceful days of the camp had been a balm on his soul, but they were still weary. They had seen too much horror in too short a time. A year may not sound like a lot in the grand scheme of things, but it had been a long, horrible year.
It hadn't been just he who had suffered either.
Hunk had touched on the bare bones of it earlier and Shiro had quietly expanded a bit on that missing year as they sat around the kitchen table eating Hunk's oatmeal. About how they had found Lance's purchases but no sign of him and had spent the next week combing the planet for any hint before expanding their search elsewhere.
They'd checked Galra prisons and their logs, not trusting Zarkon's silence on the matter, with no luck. They had not wanted to believe it true, but they had hunted down several leads on slave trade rings, breaking up several in the process and freeing many grateful aliens, but none had been Lance and none had seen him either. They had even asked the Blades to join in their search with negative results from their intel.
Because of who he was though and because Voltron was the only thing keeping Zarkon and the Galra in check, they could not plaster the universe with their search. To do so would be to announce that right now they could not truly fight back.
Lance had tried to console them at that, as given what he recalled he'd been picked up and sold immediately without any in-between and none of the citizens on the Toad's planet would have received a missing persons notification in any case nor would they have cared.
Still, Shiro had sighed bitterly, it had felt like a failure.
The team had started to splinter without him, Shiro admitted quietly. Lance had held them together; his laughter and optimism a light in the darkness of space and war. They may have indeed done so; Pidge and Hunk one way, the others another, except the Blue Lion had called out to Allura and with her acceptance of a new Paladin they had come together once more as a team.
And it was that thought that was weighing heavily on Lance's mind.
What was his role in the team now?
Allura had called him a Paladin of Voltron, their Blue Paladin. But… but he wasn't. Not really. Blue had chosen Allura as her new Paladin and she was an amazing choice. Lance didn't – couldn't – upset this new balance. Not when Allura shone so bright.
But he found too that he couldn't just walk away. Not without at least a good bye, a sense of closure.
He needed to see Blue.
But his feet were heavy and it was not because of the socks – so strange on his feet after almost a year of running about rocks barefoot and he'd been unable to put on shoes, they feeling even worse.
Things were going to be different, Shiro had said. Lance was a little afraid to find out how much so. Once he saw Blue he would have his answer and he didn't know what he wanted that to be.
He didn't want to hurt anyone.
He pushed away the niggling thought that by doing nothing he was hurting himself.
He took a deep breath, squaring his shoulders in the bathroom mirror, giving himself one last once over even though Blue would hardly care what he looked like. His Earth clothes – his jacket, he mourned – were long gone but he'd had a similar baseball style shirt in creams and brown and a pair of sweatpants in dark green (that he'd had to cinch extra on the waist although they had not changed in height). Keith had offered him a pair of not quite jeans but similar (and the fact Keith was offering him clothes as he'd grown to just an inch shy of Lance's height had made him realize again just how much they had all changed) but the material was too stiff right now following the paint tarp tunic and Lance reveled in the softness of the sweatpants.
His necklace hung to rest against the top brown line of his shirt and he reached up a hand to grasp at it, drawing strength from the stone imbued with so much love that reminded him that even if not now, even if not ever again, he had once been the Blue Paladin of Voltron and he could take pride in that.
When he'd told the small group at the kitchen table with him his plans to see Blue, Hunk had immediately volunteered to go with but Lance had shaken his head. This was something he had to do on his own.
Now though, as he paused outside the Blue Lion's hangar door, he wished he'd accepted the offer.
But he'd faced far more terrifying things than this.
Even if this meeting was about to dictate his future.
He rubbed his fingers once more against the stone and before he could hesitate any longer pushed open the doors and silently entered.
Blue was sitting regally on her haunches, yellow eyes dim and offline. No barrier surrounded her though and Lance took that as an encouraging sign even as blood pounded in his ears and he felt faint.
He could do this.
He was just here to say hello.
And… and maybe goodbye.
He swallowed the thought and made his way to stand next to her massive front paws, metal gleaming in the overhead lights. He could not greet her as he normally did with a "hello, beautiful," but he still reached out a slender hand and placed it on her paw.
Feeling pulsed through him then like an ocean wave and Lance gasped as yellow eyes lit up like small suns and Blue angled her head to gaze down at him.
Her expression did not change but Lance could feel her smiling, her joy and happiness merged too with a great sense of loss and despair and hurt and why and it was so much, too much, and Lance was only dimly aware of his legs collapsing beneath him past the pounding in his head and the overwhelming feelings and power coursing down their link.
He formed her name on his lips, pressing against the base of her paw, trying to weather through the storm of her emotions and projections, his mind no longer merely his own.
He had forgotten what it felt like to have an ancient magical being trying to share headspace.
But he made room, ever-changing and flowing as water was and he sent back his own feelings; love and hope and fear and hurt and confusion and peace, not holding back a single one.
And above the maelstrom he heard a word, a purr, a promise.
Mine.
A sob stuttered its way out of his chest.
Mine Blue repeated and just like that all of the negative fears, the worries, vanished like raindrops upon sand, replaced with a feeling of wholeness, of protection of sheer and utter love and safety.
Blue had chosen him.
She had chosen him to be her Paladin.
Again.
Lance pressed his cheek against her paw, metal cool but warming beneath his skin, tears of salt trickling down his face and calling to mind sun-warmed beaches and feeling completely ensconced in Blue's presence.
He had no idea how long he remained there until the sound of soft footsteps echoed in the hangar and he pulled himself free of where he'd curled up, Blue's other paw having come around to hold him between them.
Allura.
He straightened, rubbing a hand across his eyes and feelings of guilt stirred.
But Allura was smiling, a soft, quiet thing.
"Peace, Lance," she murmured, kneeling next to him and placing her own dark hand against Blue's paw. Her eyes closed a moment later, head tilted up and looking like an angel gazing at the heavens. Lance felt his breath catch at the sight, further compounded by the stirrings he felt from Blue of love and compassion and thank you that he realized were coming from Allura as well.
The feeling passed as Allura opened her eyes and met his gaze. "You are her Paladin, Lance," she said, reaching out a hand and placing it atop his own. "Both she and I would have it no other way."
Lance could feel Blue's rumbling acceptance of Allura's words and the peace and how right both princess and Lion felt about the decision even though there was still so much unknown, so many things that could go wrong.
They had chosen him.
Him.
Lip trembling he reached for Allura, wrapping his arms about her and after the initial "oh!" of surprise he found her holding him just as tight.
"I am so very proud of you," Allura whispered, breath tickling his ear. "You are the truest Blue Paladin I have ever had the honor to meet." She pressed a kiss to his cheek then and sat back, eyes dancing as pink stole across his features. "Now come; lunch awaits and your company is much desired."
She pulled him easily to his feet but did not release his hand upon doing so, merely giving it a squeeze as he glanced up at Blue's towering form.
He knew his own thank you would never be enough to tell the Lion how much her acceptance and love meant, but Blue understood. He sent her a tear-bright smile and allowed Allura to tug him away.
They did not go to the kitchen as he had expected but a large conference room attached to it where he discovered many tables had been dragged in and everyone was waiting.
Allura released his hand, giving him no indication of where he was to sit, but Hope made that call for him, scrambling off her seat and kidnapping his freed hand for her own and dragging him lower with her sheer strength to the sounds of both clear and garbled laughter.
Lance didn't mind at all, settling down with her as she steered him next to Pidge at one of the longer tables.
Pidge pushed over the datapad that he'd accidentally left behind in the kitchen. To his surprise there was already a message scrawled on it and he tipped it towards him.
"I love you," was written in what he recognized as Pidge's messy script and when he looked over the younger girl met his gaze straight on, the beginnings of tears in the corners of her eyes.
Lance added a "too" to the message, earning a wet laugh before he draped an arm about her and pulled her flush to his side along the bench, pressing a kiss to the top of her auburn locks, hanging loose now down her back.
"Missed you too," she murmured and he nodded, the feeling mutual.
Hope curled up on his other side and Lance beamed for the sheer joy of just smiling.
He was home.
xxx
"You'll just feel a prick," Coran said, sending Lance a comforting smile that he could not return, hating how he could feel himself trembling. "No pain, I promise."
Lance clenched at Coran's hand, trying to stop his tremors so they could proceed.
Coran had finished his analysis the next day and determined that Lance's vocal cords had not been removed completely but rather cut and then pinned backwards. Humans cords functioned as many bipedals did, he'd explained, where when they were adducted, or closed, speech occurred and when opened they allowed for breathing. Lance's had been forcibly made to remain open rather than closed, sutured in place.
It was something that Coran said had to be corrected before he went into the pod, or they would heal and scar over as they were. They would need to reopen his neck and access his vocal flaps to remove the stitching and free them, before sealing him back together and then placing him in the pod for it to heal what it could of the scar tissue and damage.
Coran did not know how well it would work; if Lance would be capable of some sounds but not speech if it worked at all, but Lance had been more than willing to try. He'd try anything.
That had been before he'd had to lie down on the medical exam table with the infirmary's bright lights shining and so white and clean and even though he knew there would be no pain and it was his family all around him he could not help but remember the last time he'd found himself in a similar situation.
"It'll be just like working on a robot," Pidge said in her way of assurance, white medical gloves up to her elbows. "In, out and close it up."
"Pidge!" gasped Hunk, but Lance felt a silent laugh burble up at her words and some of the fear leave. Pidge had become Coran's assistant in this as she had the steadiest hands outside of Coran and Lance's own and Coran had said he needed a second pair.
When Lance had asked her about the possibility of blood she'd shrugged and said she wasn't squeamish over anything. Hunk though… The larger boy had offered a shrug at that with a laugh and not denied it. It was fine though; after they sedated him Coran was ordering everyone else out of the infirmary and they would be allowed to return when he exited the cryo-pod.
Hopefully with his voice.
Zebra and Lemur had come to see him off and Zebra chortled herself with that garbled whinny and Lemur's eyes crinkled up. Coran had said if this worked he would see about what he could do for all of the other ex-slaves, although given the vast makeup of species he could not promise anything.
His offer though had been met with tears and joy when he'd made it and Coran had ended up buried in a pile of bodies and had to be rescued by Stampede.
"Ready, lad?" Coran asked, squeezing Lance's hand and Lance squeezed back with a nod.
"All righty then," and Coran held up the small syringe he had previously explained held the sedative. "On my mark then. Three… two… one…"
He injected it into the back of Lance's hand and true to his word there was only the barest prick. Lance slid suddenly heavy eyes about the room, taking in each face of his gathered family, before gravity took hold and they fell shut, his consciousness along with it.
xxx
There were voices. A lot of them.
Lance shivered, cold. The voices both quieted and grew louder and he became aware of a source of heat all across his front. He snuggled into it, something warm too wrapping about his shoulders. A deep inhale gave off the scent of oil and honeysuckle and he smiled around his confusion. Hunk. He knew that without a doubt.
"Lance, lad, can you open your eyes for us please?" came Coran's accented tones and Lance blearily tried to do so, mind fumbling for what had happened.
It came back as he finally got his leaden eyelids to lift, taking in the infirmary filled with Paladins with Zebra and Lemur there as well.
That's right. They'd been rescued. He was home.
And they were trying to restore his voice.
"Go ahead and take a nice deep breath for me," Coran instructed, placing one of his hands on Lance's back below where Hunk was hugging him and the source of warmth.
Lance did so, had clearing with each one and each one accompanied by a tingling feeling in his throat. Hunk had released him from the hug at this point, a thick blanket taking his place but one arm still draped about his shoulders. Lance swallowed thickly then. He was about to find out if it had worked.
"All right now," Coran said and Lance felt his heart pick up its thudding pace. "Nothing strenuous and make sure not to whisper as that'll strain your cords, but let's hear you say something."
Lance licked his lips.
What did he say?
"Say 'something'?" Pidge suggested, swinging her legs from where she sat on the exam table, and Hunk gave a weak sounding laugh at that and Keith snorted.
His eyes went past Pidge then to where Zebra was standing next to Allura with…
"Hope," he croaked, zeroing in on the little Balmeran girl who was clothed in what must have been one of Allura's childhood dresses of pale pink and holding onto Allura's skirt.
It took him a moment after the surprise of seeing her here, in the infirmary, to realize that word had come from him.
"Hope," he repeated, swallowing past the lump in his throat.
"That's a beautiful first word, lad," Coran wiped at his eyes and Hunk sniffled, nodding his head.
It was more than a word though. It was a name, a spark, an inspiration.
Lance took a stumbling step forward, Hunk letting him go, and he crossed the expanse to the little girl, who had let go of Allura and rushed to meet him, just as his legs gave out and he ended up crashing to his knees.
"Hope," he murmured, pulling her into shaky arms and she squeezed him back.
"Hope," Allura said softly, Lance hearing her realization. "That is your name for her."
Lance nodded, cupping the back of Hope's head against his chest and raised tear-lined eyes. "Yeah. She…" he coughed, voice still raspy," she restored mine."
"Then she restored all of ours," Shiro said quietly. He knelt down next to them and placed his own hand atop Hope's head. "Thank you, Hope."
Yellow eyes lifted and silently repeated the name that had been attached to her, smiling and nodding and letting out the garbled sounding laugh that Lance had come to absolutely adore.
"Hope," Lance whispered, holding her gaze. "Thank you."
xxx
"We are about to land," Allura announced quietly. "Are you both ready?"
"I think so," Lance replied softly. "Hope?"
"Yes," came the small reply even as she clung tightly to his hand to the point Lance thought he might have a broken finger. He didn't dare try to pry her off though and squeezed back just as tight.
It had been almost two weeks since the rescue and so much had happened. After Lance's successful revoicing (the term Coran had chosen for it) many of the other aliens had undergone a similar operation.
They were not all successful.
Some had had their way of speaking completely removed, others so damaged that not even the cyro-pod could heal it after all this time. But twenty-two including Hope had had their voices restored and those that had not, while disappointed, had been grateful for what the fresh start still entailed.
Lance's voice had come back, but it was definitely raspier than before and while he'd hoped it would clear up with time it had not. But he'd take sounding like he was recovering from bronchitis any day over not having any voice at all.
Coran had in that timeframe taken the jewels and converted them into GAC, which divvied up into an impressive sum for each ex-slave. It was easily enough to start life over anew and then some and Lance was grateful that all of the blood jewels had at least been able to do that much.
They had been going to each alien's home planet if they requested to go home and otherwise dropping them off at more city-like planets where anyone could start fresh.
Lance had cried so many times in the past few days he was surprised he wasn't a shriveled husk. Zebra, or rather Lani, had hugged him so tight, whispering in his ear with her throaty whinny, that she had suspected he was more than he appeared but she had never imagined a Paladin of Voltron. It fit him, she whispered, and she was honored to have met him.
Lani had been a lieutenant in her country's army and had been captured after falling in battle and sold off by the enemy. She was eager to return home and rejoin the fight as she had only been missing for about four months and had been the first ex-slave dropped off despite Lance wishing for her to remain as long as possible. She had become a close friend and he missed her presence the moment she had disembarked.
The ex-slaves had loved hearing Lance's names for them and the explanations of their origin. Telling Dorito (Ralitán) he was named for a cheese-flavored chip had made the bird laugh so hard, a high delighted squawk that had Lance grinning for hours after hearing it. Kuzco (Blath) had taken a bit of a roundabout depiction and Lance sorely wished they'd had a copy of his movie, but the llama-looking alien Lance thought had been more amused by Lance trying to explain it than what it actually meant. Blath was one who had never regained his voice, but he was leaving with Plaid (Sessia) who had and she had assured Lance they would both be fine.
Allura had created a channel with a transmission code specifically for Lance and had given each alien the address so they could reach out at any time to him. Lance already had a few messages from those they had delivered to their homes first; calls of thanks and introductions of their own families and Lance had cried so hard when Lemur (Ateo) – had shown him his large family and how happy they were to have their dad back.
Lance had been beyond excited to meet Hope's family, but hers was not a happy tale. She was an orphan, she had whispered, curled up in his lap following dinner with her voice returned, and had been given the name of Mousi – meaning garbage – by the matron of the orphanage she had been picked up by. Her parents had been traders for her Balmera (of which Hope only knew as "Balmera" and nothing more) and had been killed by thieves over ten years ago. She could not recall the name they had given her.
She had asked voice small, if it was all right she kept the name of Hope instead and Lance had squeezed her and said thickly he'd be beyond honored if she wished to.
Amber (Nakila) had offered for Hope to come live with her on her home planet – a peaceful farming village with great plains of grass and wheat – and several other ex-slaves too had made the generous suggestion, but Hope had clung to Lance and he didn't have the heart to force her away. He'd wanted to keep her with him, but Allura had sadly pointed out that she would be in harm's way if she remained with Voltron and none of them wished that for her.
Ultimately they had decided, with Hope's permission, to bring her to a Balmera they were familiar with (and whose environment would be the most comforting and familiar thing to a Balmeran that they could offer) and Shay had coordinated with them for a family to take Hope in, one with a daughter already of their own who would love a sister.
Hope was the last one to leave the castle, which had grown quieter and quieter without Lance's new extended family. He missed her already and she was still in his arms, ruffles of the child's gown bunched over his knee. Allura had put together an entire trunk of dresses for her to keep and the absolute delight on Hope's face at the present had brought Allura to tears. The two of them had spent hours in Allura's chambers trying on dresses and holding tea parties (those of which Lance partook in along with Hunk's delicious cookies) and Hope had taken quite a shine to the princess. Lance wasn't surprised; everyone in the universe loved Allura.
The entire team had grown fond of Hope in the couple weeks she'd been aboard the ship. She cooked with Hunk, took piggyback rides on Shiro, tinkered with Coran, watched with utter fascination as Pidge dismantled and created robotics and to Lance's utter delight had an obsession with Keith's hair and often requested to play with it and braid it, to which Keith had agreed with surprisingly very little reluctance.
But now it was time for her to go.
Lance wasn't ready. Even as he felt the castle dock and his legs robotically propelled him and Hope, who still clung to his hand, forward he was not ready.
As they hit the warm but still pleasant surface of the Balmera and Shay called out a cheerful greeting followed by many others, pressing in to say hello as it had been months since Voltron had last stopped, he was not ready.
He was never going to be ready... but he had to be.
He was dimly aware of Shay bringing a couple over towards he and Hope, where they were standing off to the side of the main throng, with another little girl in tow who gave a shy wave that Hope returned, even as she hid behind his leg.
"Lance," Shay stepped forward and he found himself pulled into a tight hug before she released him, hands staying on his shoulders as soulful yellow eyes met his. "It is so good to see you again."
"You too," he managed.
"And you must be Hope," she knelt down in front of the child. "I am Shay."
"Hello," Hope whispered.
"I would like to introduce you to some very special Balmerans," Shay continued. "This is Lia and her husband, Tamo. And this is Kalinda, their daughter. She is only a few years older than you!"
"Hi!" chirped Kalinda.
Hope murmured back a greeting.
This was Hope's new family.
Lance was not ready.
But he couldn't keep holding on to her. He had to let her go.
Hope seemed to sense it too as she clung tighter to his leg and Lance knelt down as well, pulling her into a tight hug.
"I'll see you again, right?" she sniffled.
"Of course," Lance pressed a kiss to her head. "You can call me every day if you want to, okay? And I'll come visit at least once a month and we can hang out and play hopscotch and… and…" He trailed off, voice becoming even raspier as tears clogged his throat.
He was going to miss her so, so much.
"You are welcome any time, Paladin Lance," Lia said quietly, her eyes soft. "Our home is always open to you."
"Thank you," Lance whispered, knowing it wasn't enough for what they were doing but it was all he was capable of offering. The Balmerans understood though and smiled gently.
"This is good bye for now then," Lance turned back to Hope, pressing a kiss to her bumpy head. "But I'll see you soon. And I'll think of you every day."
"Every day?"
"Mhm," Lance pulled the necklace out from beneath his shirt, the blue stone catching the light and the symbol near glowing in the middle. "Whenever I see this I think of you, Hope."
She smiled, eyes crinkling. "It's your treasure."
Lance shook his head. "No." He released the stone and pulled her back into his arms, pressing a last kiss to her head. "You are."
Hope was indeed the truest treasure the universe had to offer.
xxx
Author's Notes:
*sniffle* I'm not crying, I swear it (I'm lying). Hope was a true pleasure to write and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I have. Please do leave a comment before you go; I'd love to hear from you what you thought about the story. Thank you very much and I look forward to reading your comments.
(Like my work? Keep up with me on tumblr, icypantherwrites)