AUTHOR'S NOTES: So, this is an idea that I've had in my head for a week or so, I'm not quite sure how the idea came to me, but I can tell you that it is heavily inspired by the many adventures I've had as a university student (because, at university, there's no such thing as a 'quiet drink!)

Anyway, for ages I wondered if this story would actually work, but a lot of people of Instagram supported me and told me to write it, so here it is! I'm still not sure how confident I am, but I had a lot of fun writing this and I enjoyed the challenge of writing about the Captain in such a state.

Anyway, this was just a bit of fun, so I really hope you enjoy it!

Intoxication

Just a quiet drink with his soon-to-be son in law, that was all it was supposed to be. The affair had come about by rather straightforward reasoning, so, Georg had managed to convince his wife that it would follow a similar sort of chronology. But, oh, how wrong he'd been. For the purposes of context, this is how it all came to be…
Once the family had first arrived in America, they had settled in New York; and although they hadn't stayed there long, Liesl had been lucky enough to meet a strapping young fellow by the name of William Bennett, a young American who – much to Georg's liking – was in the navy. Even throughout the Von Trapp's numerous moves to Maryland (and now) Vermont, Liesl and William had remained close, and at some point – rather unbeknownst to her father – the two had began a courtship. Of course, nothing really became of it until only a few months after the war, William had proposed, and she had accepted without any doubts. And that's where they were now…

Now, much to everyone's delight (and surprise) Georg had always got on well with William, and after some scrutinisation and quite a serious talk, he had given the betrothed couple his blessing – even in spite of Liesl's young age. Now, one may be wondering just how the pair of them ended up in the state that has been alluded to, well, that's really quite simple. You see, William still lived in New York, and it simply doesn't do for an engaged couple to live in two separate states and not see each other, so, William had travelled to Vermont to spend some time with the family; and Maria and Georg had kindly offered him the guest room. Only a day after his arrival, Georg had insisted that he show his (almost) son-in-law around Stowe, and William could hardly refuse.

Initially, Maria had furrowed her brow at the suggestion and reminded Georg that they now had nine children under their roof (little Sebastian had been born just nine months ago), but Georg had convinced her with a warm smile and had used those infamous words: just a 'quiet drink'. But was there ever such a thing? Besides, he had also reminded her that Max (who was also staying with them whilst he passed through Vermont) was out scouting in Stowe that night and due to the impresario's busy schedule, he and William had never formally met. And that, laddies, gentlemen and everyone in-between, is how Georg Von Trapp (and his soon-to-be son in law) found themselves stumbling through the front door at four in the morning, blind drunk and chaperoned by a painfully sober Max…

Georg had stumbled into the house merrily, and with a painful crash, landed in a drunken heap on the floor; William – who was in a similar state – had roared with laughter at the sight of it. Max, meanwhile, had scolded him greatly as he attempted to stop William from joining him on the floor. Of course, Georg had paid him no mind, and instead preceded to roll onto his back and laugh at his grumpy old friend.

"Max! Did you see that? It was like the combat rolls they used t' make us do in the – in the navy!" he cheered loudly.

"More like a sunken ship, Georg" Max snorted as he heaved William into a standing position…only to have the young man sink down to his knees pathetically.

"Awww…" Georg sighed in mock offence.

William crawled up to Georg's head.

"Wait!" he announced, "you were in the navy?"

From his position on the floor, he nodded madly, and in his state of intoxication, was unable to detect the fact that he was hitting his head against the hard wood floors.

"Yes!" he confirmed.

"Guess what?" said William in an enthused stage whisper.

"What?"

"I'm in the navy too!" he cheered.

"Wunderbar!" Georg enthused – his voice much too loud.

"Will you two keep it down!" Max scolded.

"Don't be such a bore, Max! Maybe if you'd joined us for a couple of whiskeys instead of dragging us into the back of your car, you'd be having more fun" he pouted.

Max pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed, now he remembered why he'd never offered to be the designated driver.

"First of all, you're welcome. Secondly, I refuse to believe that the two of you only had a couple of whiskeys each"

"We did, Max. I swear!" William defended.

"When I found you two, there were at least twenty empty glasses on that table!"

Suddenly, the two drunkards burst into fits of laughter and Max sighed again…this was surely going to be a long night. Still, he was glad that Maria hadn't been woken by the fuss, she would surely have a fit if she saw her husband in such a state…and rightly so, he had thought.

"Okay, okay…" Georg began as he rose to his knees, "so maaaybe we had a few too many, but William hasn't really seen S-Stowe before, and besideees, he's gonna marry my Liesl!"

"I am?" William gasped.

"Yes, you are!"

"That's nice…" William said dreamily, "…I like Liesl"

For whatever reason – perhaps just inspiration – Georg suddenly decided that he should try and stand, staggering feverishly as he did so. Whilst watching the struggle, Max chuckled internally and couldn't help but liken his drunken friend to one of those books Brigitta had told him about…Bambi? Was it? But his ponderings were interrupted when Georg finally stood up – swaying considerably.

"I'm surprised the two of you aren't comatose!" the impresario bit impatiently.

"I'll give you tomacose!" he said defiantly.

"Yes, I'm sure you will"

"Georg! Georg!" William called from the floor as he tugged at the man's trousers, "I don't think tomacose is right"

"What is it then?" he questioned as he fell against the doorframe.

"…mocatose?"

"Oh, you two are exhausting" Max grumbled.

"Max!" Georg suddenly shouted, "How cruel of you!"

"Stop shouting!"

"No" he protested – his tone light, like a cocky toddler.

"Yes, Georg" Max said firmly.

"Why?"

"Because not only do you have all nine of your children still living in this house – one of whom is barely a year old – but you also have a wife that will surely have you keelhauled if you disturb anyone…and that probably goes for you too, William"

"Don't be silly! My wife is probably up on those mountains"

"You're not in Austria anymore"

"Huh?"

"You're in America"

"Huh, well that's the funniest thing! I was in Vermont earlier" he pondered.

Oh, for god sakes.

"Why can't you be a quiet drunk like William?"

"I will not be quiet" Georg protested with a slight huff.

"Oh, yes you will!" they heard from the top of the stairs.

The gazes of all three men shot to the source of the sound, and through the darkness, they could see Maria marching towards them – her robe wrapped securely around her.

"Maria!" he called out gleefully – which earned him a stern 'Shhh' from Max.

"Georg Von Trapp, I swear that I am going to throttle you!" she sighed as she finally joined the group, "Max, how could you let them get into such a state?"

"Unfortunately, they were like this when I found them, and once I saw how much they'd had to drink, I drove them back immediately"

"Do I want to know how much they've had?" she asked wearily.

Max only replied with a slow shake of his head. When Maria turned back to face the other two men, she found William lying flat on his back with his head resting on the welcome mat, and Georg was once again on his knees – his eyes staring vacantly at her bare feet.

"Come on, get up" she said in a parental tone.

"No…it's nice down here" he whined.

"I don't care. Get up"

"You're pretty, Maria" he suddenly announced with an inebriated smile.

"And you're devilishly handsome too, but I need to get you into bed"

"Bed?!" he gasped – perhaps with too much melodrama, "I am shocked, Maria! We've only just met!"

"Oh, lord, give me strength" Maria muttered to herself, "Max, do you think you could—"

"—Father? William?" they heard from another mystery voice, only this time, it was Liesl who came trotting down the stairs, "Are they okay?"

"They're fine, dear, they've just had a few too many" Max assured.

"And you?"

"Stone cold sober. I was merely their driver and caretaker until your mother showed up"

"Oh, no you don't! You can't wriggle out of this one, Max" Maria told him.

"Worth a try" he smirked.

Then they heard a gasp come from William.

"Liesl! Hello, Liesl!"

"Hello, William" she responded wearily – not used to the sight of a merrily drunken man, let alone her fiancée!

"Liesl, did you know that we are to be married?"

"Yes, I do believe you mentioned it" she giggled.

"Do you think you can stand up, Will?" Max asked, "You need to get some sleep"

"Okay…" he murmured before eventually getting to his feet.

He swayed a bit once he was all the way up, but with a delicate shake of his head, he managed to remain upright.

"Liesl…" he began in another stage whisper.

"Yes?"

"Where's my room?"

"Come on, I'll show you" she chuckled.

Her fiancée took a few mismatched steps towards her and flung an arm over her shoulder for support.

"Do you want me to help you with father when I'm done?"

"No thank you, sweetheart, I'm sure Max and I can manage…right, Max?" Maria asked teasingly, making it quite clear that she would not be letting Max shirk away from helping her.

"Yes, of course. We'll be fine, Liesl, don't worry about us"

"Okay…" she said as she slowly led William down the hall, "Goodnight"

"Goodnight" they both replied.

"Now, Georg let's—" Maria cut herself off when she discovered that her husband was now sat down, leaning back against the doorframe with his eyes closed and mouth hanging open, "…oh, for goodness sake" she moaned with a dramatic placement of her hand on her forehead.

Max couldn't help but chuckle as Maria knelt beside him.

"Georg," she prompted whilst gently nudging his shoulder, "Georg, are you awake?"

No response. Then Max stepped in and gave his friend several soft taps on the cheek whilst also beckoning his name. Georg eventually stirred – his vision showing him multiple Maxes for just a second.

"Max!" he greeted when he could see straight, then he turned to face his wife, "Hello, Maria" he purred seductively.

"We're going to get you into bed now, Georg, okay?" she asked as they began to haul him to his feet.

"Fine, but I'm not going to take res-responsibility for the scandal!" he said proudly.

"That's fine, darling" Maria replied without much interest in their joke of a conversation.

Maria secured herself on one side of Georg and Max was on the other, and once they both had a firm grip on him, began to tread carefully up the stairs. However, Georg's steps were just as clumsy as William's, so it wasn't exactly a quick get-away…but fortunately (unfortunately) for them, Georg had plenty of ways to pass the time. Much to their dismay, he began to sing…

"Raindrops on roses and whiskers on mittens! Bright copper kettles and warm woollen kittens!" he sang proudly, obviously unaware of the mockery he was making of the number, "Brrrrown paper packages tied up with –"

"Be quiet!" Maria hissed.

"But isn't that your song, Maria? Why won't you let me sing it?"

"Because there is a nine-month-old baby in the nursey and if you wake him up I'll make you sleep outside with the horses!"

"Wait, a baby? How did that get there?"

"He's ours, darling"

"I beg your pardon?" he gasped – utterly scandalised.

They were only halfway up the stairs.

"We have two biological children together"

He gasped again. Loudly.

"And outside of wedlock! I am shocked, Maria!"

"Yes, it's simply terrible" she humoured.

"Did you know about this, Max?"

"Yes, isn't it deliciously asinine?"

"Very asi-si-nine…well, we're going to have t' get married, Maria!" he proclaimed.

"Okay, dear, we'll get married"

For a few seconds, they were blessed with silence, but, it seemed as though Georg wasn't at all happy with that…

"Hey, hey, Max" he probed.

"Yes, Georg?"

They were at the top of the stairs now.

"I have a secret"

"And what might that be?"

Georg planted his feet firmly on the floor and halted their movements, then, he leant closer to Max, shushed him several times and then giggled…

"I'm in love with Maria!"

"Are you really?"

"Yes, but –" he held his index finger up to his lips, "—don't tell her"

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it" Max smirked.

He looked over at Maria, and even she had had to stifle a giggle or two at Georg's newest outburst. The man in question finally stood upright again, and as they began to walk towards the master bedroom, his eyes were met with the beautiful face of his wife.

"Hello, Maria" he said giddily.

"Hello, Georg"

"Hey, Maria, I have a secret…I just told Max, do you want to hear it too?"

"Go on then"

Much like before, he stopped suddenly and leant towards his wife.

"I'm in love with you!"

"Well, that's good, because I'm your wife"

"You are?!" he puffed with wonder.

"Yes, I am" she confirmed her statement by holding up her hand and showing him her wedding ring.

Stunned, Georg looked down at his own hand and saw a wedding ring of his own.

"We really are married! Huh, that was quick! I only proposed to you on the stairs!"

"The lord can work in mysterious ways" Maria mused to him.

Finally, they made it to the door of the master bedroom.

"Wait, wait, wait…" Georg said suddenly.

"What's the matter?" Maria asked with a slight sense of alarm.

"If we just got married, then…" his eyes suddenly darkened and his dried lips turned up into a smirk, "…then that means that tonight is our wedding night" he said – attempting to sound suave.

"Oh dear…" Maria breathed.

Abandoning his hold on Max, Georg leant in closer to his wife, and he moved two of his fingers up her arm like little legs until they reached the base of her neck. He proceeded to give her cheek a singular stroke.

"Why don't we get to work on our tenth child?"

"Georg!" Maria bleated as her cheeks began to turn crimson.

"Come on, love, it's nothing you've not seen before…and it is our wedding night"

"No, Georg, we've been married for six years"

She watched as he fell silent – his drunken mind desperately trying to figure out the mathematics of what she'd just said. He gave up after a few long seconds.

"In any case, we're still married, which means we're free to do as we please!" he said joyfully, though his voice hadn't lost its newly acquired flirtatious tone.

"And right now, you need to get into bed and get some sleep"

He buried his lips into her neck, and even in his current state, was strong enough to prevent Maria from pushing him away.

"Not until we've had a quick roll in the hay" he teased.

"Georg!" shrieked Maria, "Max I am so sorry"

"Don't be, my dear," he chuckled, "you forget that we were in the navy together, I've seen him get up to far worse!"

"Yes, well, that's something I don't need to be reminded of"

"Sorry" he laughed.

Max stepped forward and gave Georg's shoulder a light tap.

"Max…" he hissed as he pulled away from Maria, "…I'm busy"

"Busy with your very unimpressed wife"

"Huh?" he looked up, "Hi, Maria!"

"Hello, Georg" her patience was beginning to wear thin, "Are you ready to behave and get into bed?"

"You can't deprive a man of the opportunity to make love to his wife!" he protested.

"Oh-ho, just you watch me"

"Ice queen!" he gasped melodramatically as he turned away from her, but then his mood changed again, "No, I don't really mean that…" he giggled, "…do you know why?"

"Why?"

"Because I looove you"

"Lucky me" she breathed with exhaustion. Then she had an idea. "Georg, do you know what would make me love you in return?"

He shook his head vigorously.

"If you went into our bedroom and put your pyjamas on" she whispered into his ear – hoping that the seductive façade would work.

"So you can take them off again?" he asked – far too loud for her liking.

"Of course," she winced, fully aware that Max was still with them and enjoying every second of the encounter, "Run along" she instructed.

"Whatever you want love!" and with that, he waltzed mirthfully into their bedroom.

Maria let out with a long, exasperated sigh.

"Thank goodness that's over"

"You're not out of the woods yet," Max reminded her, "You still have to get him into bed…and hope he doesn't try and jump on you"

"Oh, help" she sighed – more to herself than Max.

"I would offer to help, but with the things that are obviously running through Georg's mind, I don't think I want to see what kind of state he'll get himself into"

"I can't say I blame you…I'm sure I'll be fine"

"In any case, you come and find me if things get a bit out of control"

"You've seen him like this before, any advice?" she asked hopefully.

"Well, when he was this drunk, I usually was too…but humouring him seems to be working well, so I'd say keep trying that"

"Okay"

"You have the patience of a saint, Maria"

"It comes with having nine children and an occasionally equally childish husband" she chuckled.

"Goodnight, Maria. You know where I am if you need me"

"Thank you, Max. And goodnight"

Without giving herself a chance to think about what she'd have to deal with next, Maria walked straight into her bedroom, and upon entering, found her husband in a rather unsightly heap on the floor – his torso completely bare.

"What happened?" she asked with a twist of annoyance.

"Well, I sat on the bed to take my shoes off, but when I leant forward, the rest of my body just kind of followed" he explained somewhat sheepishly.

Maria let herself giggled that that one before helping him back into a sitting position. She knelt down and began to unlace his shoes.

"Come on, let's get these shoes off" she said – as if she were talking to one of the children.

"Hmm, undressing me already, huh? You can barely keep your hands off me" he purred.

"Yes, dear" she humoured.

"What are we going to call this tenth child that we're going to make?"

She rolled her eyes.

"I don't know"

In truth, she found the conversation rather intriguing. She knew that Georg was more open after a few drinks, and even though Sebastian wasn't yet a year old, she was interested to hear his thoughts on having more children.

"Sofia!" he exclaimed, "That's a nice name"

"Yes, it is" Maria hummed as she pulled off his first shoe.

"Or what about Barbara?"

"Uh, darling, one of the children is already called Barbara"

"They are?"

"Yes, dear, the first one we had together. Remember? She was born about six months after we came to America"

"Oh yeah!" he cried gleefully.

"So, no more Barbaras"

His other shoe was off now. She also made quick work of removing his socks before standing in front of him.

"We could always call if fluffy!" he giggled.

"I don't think they'd be too pleased with that"

"Well, sometimes it's not the end result, but all the practice that comes first" he pondered.

"What are you talking abou—"

But before she could get an answer, Georg wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her down onto the bed with him…suddenly she knew exactly what he'd been talking about. They landed in a heap on the bed, but Georg wasted no time in kissing her skin – his lips on a lazy search for her own.

"Mmm, let's have another baby, Maria"

"Now's not really the best time"

"Please" he pleaded.

"Another time, dear"

"But I want to have another baby" he moaned as he stopped kissing her.

"We will one day, but, right now, you're not feeling too good, are you?"

He lifted his head slightly and contemplated his wife's words…the room was starting to spin a bit.

"You're right" he admitted.

It seemed the more hyperactive side of his drunken persona was making way for a more mellow and sleepier personality…something that Maria was quite relieved to discover.

"Wait here…" she said as she untangled herself from his embrace, "…I'll go and get your pyjamas"

"Does this mean you won't be undressing me?"

"I'm afraid not" she sniggered.

"Shame…"

She retrieved his pyjamas from the wardrobe, but when she turned back to face him, she found him gazing at her with a rather silly grin on his face.

"What are you smiling at?"

"You," he replied, "You're beautiful"

"Thank you" she replied rather sincerely, "Do you think you can managed with the pyjamas by yourself?"

Again, he staggered to his feet and took the blue fabric from his wife before giving her a vigorous nod.

"Good"

As he stripped himself of his trousers and underwear, another idea hit Maria and she went to fetch the small bin from their en-suite; he was in his pyjamas when she returned, and she placed the bin at his bedside.

"I'd much rather you'd go into the bathroom in the case of such an emergency, but this is just in case you can't make it…" she gestured to the bin, "...and I'd rather you ruin our bin than our carpets"

"Okay" he hummed sleepily.

Maria gave him a tender look in return.

"Come one, into bed" she instructed, and for the first time, he obeyed the order.

He crawled – slowly – beneath the sheets and eventually settled himself, she could tell that sleep was creeping up on him fast. It was her favourite part of his drunkenness, she thought to herself with a smile. Once he seemed to be comfortable, she moved around to her own side of the bed and got under the covers; she lay facing him, just so she could make sure he got to sleep okay. Of course, he wasn't asleep just yet, and when she lay down, their eyes met instantly.

"Maria…" he whispered.

"Yes?"

"Thank you" he said, his tone overflowing with giddy affection.

"For what?"

"For looking after me"

"I'm your wife, Georg, there's no need to thank me"

"But I've…I've been a nuisance tonight, haven't I?"

The word 'nuisance' had taken him some time, but he'd managed to pronounce it correctly…it seemed as though he was still very drunk.

"Oh, absolutely!" she chuckled, "But it could've been worse, at least Sebastian is still asleep…anyway, I'm sure you'll pay for it in the morning"

"I love you, Maria" he told her, and it was the first serious thing he'd said all night.

She reached out and lightly brushed his cheek with her knuckles.

"I love you too"

She moved closer and gave him a soft kiss before allowing him to close his eyes. But just when she thought she was home free, her husband had one final comment…

"We'll make a baby tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay," she chuckled, "If you're up for up"

She would never admit it, but there was a small – yet very wicked – part of her that was rather looking forward to seeing what kind of hangover he'd be left with in the morning…

AUTHOR'S NOTES: *Important!* If you want me to write another chapter, I will. I was thinking about writing a bit more that showed the morning after, but I wanted it to be funny and just couldn't think of anything, so I decided to leave it as it is. But, if you want me to write one more chapter, then I will gladly do so! :)

Anyway, there you go! I hope you think that worked. I knew it would be difficult writing about Georg drunk because he's a lot more controlled and reserved, but you do see glimpses of playfulness within his personality, so I really wanted to explore the dimensions that he has as a character.

For a while, I though about writing about Maria being drunk, since that would be easier and perhaps funnier, but a friend of mine once mentioned that they wanted to do that, so out of respect for them, I disregarded that idea and chose Georg instead. And even if it isn't the best piece of writing I really did have fun doing it!

(For the record, the thing with Georg falling off the bed whilst trying to remove his shoes is something that has happened to me so many time! XD)

Anyway, I think that's all I have to so. I really, really hope you enjoyed that and I'd love to hear your thoughts, so please leave a review!

I'll see you soon! xxx