A/N: REVIEW FOR IT FEEDS MY ETERNAL ENGINE OF CREATION!

So, long story short I've been watching One Piece again,

Seeing as the latest chapter of Hard Contact didn't get a lot of love, my inner mused sort of...took over. When I say took over, I mean it got right and properly riled up, to the point that I'd gone and written this before I knew it. This...

...this'll be something new.

Well, I have no idea if its been done before, but even if it has, I wanted to try my own spin on it.

You can also expect an update for "Hard Contact" and the rest, soon!

To clarify, this chapter takes place in the Sabaody arc.

And yes, the "intro" is told from Naruto's P.O.V.

Yes, its deliberately short.

Hope you all like it~!

"World Nobles...slaves...human shops...against the "purity" of these "upper classes", the villains of the world look positively humane in comparison. It's because the world's in the hands of scum like them that it's all screwed to hell...I mean, we're not the nicest of guys, but at least we're honest about it...unlike some people."

"Eh? What're you looking at me for? I'm innocent this time!"

~a certain pirate and a certain noble.

The Highest Bidder

Who possesses the greatest power in the world?

The Four Emperors?

The One Piece?

The Navy?

Pirates?

No.

If one were to consult a scholar, he would tell you that the greatest power in the world belongs to the World Nobles, otherwiise known as the Celestial Dragons. These so-called descendants of nineteen of the Twenty Kings who established what is now known as the World Government. They believe that their "bloodline" makes them gods. With no one to disabuse them of this delusion they carry out inhumane acts without the slightest fear of consequences. They know neither hunger nor pain; indeed, they utterly disregard any facet of law or society that does not serve their own interests.

Tenryūbito.

Filthy, filthy, filthy.

Even now I'm disgusted to count myself among their number.

I ask you, what makes slavery divine? What gives you the right to inflict that misery on another being?

What, for that matter, is so "heavenly" about a bunch of fat bastards lazing about in Mariejos? All I've ever known are cowards who torment others for their own amusement, flaunt their own power to spite others; who rip families apart and steal children for their own petty acts of spite and indulgence. A wise man once said that with great power comes great responsibility. Celestial Dragons can't fathom that. Rather, they don't want to. They'd sooner cast out a family a man-and his family-who sought to better themselves than admit their own folly. Are the sins of the father those of the son? No! They are not!

Idiots, the lot of them!

They barely know their asses from their elbows!

We could do so much GOOD yet they CHOOSE to be cruel!

I suppose it doesn't matter anymore. I've long since made up my mind.

If you can't change a system from without, then you have to do it from within. Sometimes that's the only way. Though you might despise it and everyone within, you have to bite that bullet. Grin and bear it. Adopt a facade and put on an act...all the while undermining the foundation of everything they cherish. If can't beat them? Join them. Tear them down from the inside out, rip them apart and watch as they fight amongst one another; like starving dogs scraping for meat.

What better way to do it that by turning them against each other? After all...

...whoever said one dragon can't devour another?

(...Scene Break...)

"SOLD!"

Disco's gavel crashed down upon the desk with a resounding thud and brought a deathly pall to the auction house. Once. Twice. Thrice. Each strike seemed to echo endlessly into the open space beyond, ringing with a heavy finality. Indeed, the entire grove itself seemed to fall silent, a shroud of confusion draping itself over those assembled, royalty and commoner alike. All eyes turned towards the one responsible. Some gaped. Others glowered, infuriated at having been outbid so easily. None possessed the means to challenge that obscene amount. Had any dared attempt such a feat, they would've found themselves pinned by that laserlike glare.

"Do I hear any objections?!"

The auctioneer's words met empty silence.

After all, when someone bids one hundred billion berries on an entire auction house worth of slaves, the world tends to take notice. But it did not do so meekly. Disquieted murmurs wafted into the air and took wing, irritated whispers rising to the trained ear. One had but to listen. They were hushed of course, for no one wanted to risk provoking the auctioneer's ire, yet present nevertheless.

"Him again?"

"I can't match that!"

"Just because he's a damn-

"And so we have it. then!" one could all but taste the avarice in the slaver's voice. "They're all yours, my good man!"

"Good." a rough voice intoned. "You'll find the payment in the usual place."

"Always a pleasure doing business with your lordship!"

"I'll be taking them now, then."

Pascia swallowed thickly.

She'd heard it all, and it dashed her hopes against the rocky shore of despair.

The sheer number alone threatened to make her weak at the knees and leave her a trembling wreck onstage; not because of the amount, but the intent of the one who'd issued it. Anyone willing to throw away such obscene sums of money couldn't be right in the head. If they were, then there desires couldn't be anything short of untoward. Sabaody Archipelago hadn't seen such a remarkable bid since its inception. Even she, as a dancer, had never heard of such an absurd sum.

Just what did this man intend to do with them?

As she looked on, all eyes turned to regard the highest bidder.

Distantly, she recognized his garb as that of a World Noble...but there was something off about it. Almost decidedly so. For one, he wasn't fat; if anything he looked almost dangerously lean beneath those flowing white robes. He'd absconded with the traditional resin coating that traditionally prevented them from breathing the air of the common people. Nor did his wild unruly hair contain that hideous curl that the Dragons were so known for. He looked almost...normal. His sole defining features were a pair of striking blue eyes set in a tan face framed by whiskered cheeks and the untamed flaxen hair she'd first seen.

Was he with those nobles from before?

No, her eyes argued, he couldn't be. The other seemed to be seething at his very presence, for their faces were knotted with rage. Yet neither did they challenge him. The fat one seemed to be twisting and writhing with rage, his temper contained only by the firm hand grasping at his shoulder. Interesting, a tiny, detached part of her mused, even as the rest of her mind bleated with fear. Then who was-

Those eyes held her now, brighter than the sky itself.

Rational thought abandoned her, replaced by blood-curdling fear.

A small tremor ran through her as he approached the stage. Wait. He couldn't possibly intended to...

...he did.

She shrank back half a step as the Celestial Dragon nimbly vaulted the stage and alighted into a pointed crouch before her. Rising to his full, towering height, he loomed over her. Something in her quailed in the face of that blank visage. When he reached for her collar, she flinched aside. An unuttered shriek of grief lingered on her lips, ready to spring forth at the slightest provocation. To voice them would be death, yet her heart gave a painful wrench regardless. No, no, no! She didn't want to be sold! She had a life! A family!

"S-Sir!" the auctioneer protested, "I...this is highly irregular!"

If the Dragon heard him, he did precious little to show it.

Coughing softly, into a fist, the Noble spoke.

"Right, then. For my very first order...

She wasn't prepared for the smile.

"Hold still. This won't hurt."

"What?"

Wordlessly, his hand found the collar around Pascia's neck and pulled. The dancer nearly yelped and fainted on the spot. But rather than explode as she'd feared, his hand simply phased through the hardened metal. Like an ethereal shade, her "master" simply reached in and through, as though searching for something. Whatever it was, he found it. A soft click reached her ears, punctuated by a dull crunch as the lock gave way. A great weight dropped from her shoulders; in spite of her best efforts, her hands flew to her now-exposed neck. Her mind blanked. How could it not? He'd just done something so inane, so hopelessly absurd, that she had no way of recognizing it, let alone accepting the unlikely outcome of his actions. Had she fainted? Was she dreaming? Surely she must be. And yet...

...this felt real. Painfully, agonizingly real, matching the frantic pounding of her heart.

Fear and joy clashed with one another, chasing themselves across her visage.

A wordless sense of relief consumed, her stealing her words away.

"I...you...why?" she croaked out, her eyes tearing up.

In disbelief, she stared at her unlocked collar.

Again, she faced that heartstopping smile.

"You're all free to go, ya know!"

The dancer blinked.

...hah?"

A/N: Yes, Pascia is an actual character. Look her up if you don't believe me.

Just a quick little intro to what promises to be an absolutely

Celestial Dragon or not, I can easily see Naruto buying AN ENTIRE AUCTION house just to free the slaves. Strikes me as the sort of thing he'd do.

After all, we all know he likes to go overboard.

Bit of a lighthearted yet semi-serious take on things. I've seen stories where Naruto was a slave of the Celestial Dragons, but never actually one himself. Yes, its implied that he and Doflamingo knew one another as children; the difference being that one left the World Nobles-thanks to Homing-while the other grew up as one of them, and gradually came to despise them. Now there's an arc that'll come back to bite him if he isn't careful.

So let's clarify:

Naruto is Naruto. As in his parents were still Minato and Kushina, just in in this world. He's strong, wicked fast, and possesses a strong moral compass. In terms of age I'd peg him as a roughly a year or three under Doflamingo. And yes, Naruto has a full head of hair-thing Jiraiya's Gutsy Ninja-because I cannot STAND his design in Boruto. Despite his actions, he's very much on the side of good and doesn't approve of Charloss and the others.

...unlike his compatriots.

Devil Fruit, you say?

*Zips lips*

Nope, not talking about that yet!

DEATH TO THE CELESTIAL DRAGONS! DEATH I SAY!

So...in the immortal words of Atlas...

...Review, would you kindly?

And enjoy the preivews!

(Preview!)

Charloss bristled.

"I WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS!"

"We must be better than this. And if the only alternative is violence...

He paused.

"I'm not sorry."

Roswald quailed.

"No! Wait! I beg of you-

The knife descended ruthlessly.

"Doffy, right? I remember you."

"Tch. Still a meddling bastard as always, I see."

"Say, whatever happened to your brother? I liked him."

For the first time since their conversation began, Doflamingo stopped smiling.

"You think you can do some good as one of them?! You're filth! Don't touch me!"

"Even so, I want to make the world better!"

R&R! =D