A/N: This is my first 'real' story I've written, so bring on any constructive criticism—it'll only improve me. I'm studying Screenwriting at University, so writing prose is not my usual thing. That said, there's some 'housecleaning' required before you jump in: Remus and Tonks never married, never had Teddy, and aren't together by the Battle of Hogwarts. They never made much sense to me and I prefer her and Harry together. Secondly, Harry and Ginny aren't together, for similar reasons. Ron and Hermione have a role in this story but aren't main characters. It's all about Harry and Tonks. One thing I've chosen to tweak is Harry's child abuse at the hands of the Dursleys. For this story I wanted Harry to be a little more scarred and broken, thus, the abuse needed to be harder. If that turns you off, don't worry, there are no depictions of torture or beatings, it's just discussed. Another thing—it's probably the most important change—there will be Dumbledore bashing. It won't be excessive, it will kind of be a reflective hate from Harry. Just a heads up. Lastly, canon is going to be a mix of both the books and films, so it might get confusing for some but try to just roll with it. Well, that's enough rambling from me. Enjoy…

CHAPTER 1: The Aftermath

Ashes to ashes, smoke and rubble.

Dead silence.

The last remnants of the Dark Lord evaporated away. Harry stood there – it was finally over. It was over? Now what was he going to do? All this time. All this pain. Now what?

He just stood there, frozen still. Everyone was looking at him. What were they thinking? What did they expect? He looked to his hands, each held a wand he had won. Hawthorn, unicorn hair, 10" – formerly Draco Malfoy's. In the other, Elder, thestral tail hair, 15" – the fabled Elder Wand, Albus' wand.

He couldn't remember how the Elder wand got in his hand, it was last seen throwing another killing curse at him. But there it was. It felt odd… like it was purring. Very strange.

A weight on his shoulder- Harry jumped and turned. First thing he saw—despite his dirty glasses—was pink, a dull pink, but still, pink. The next discernible detail were the thin lips, a mix or sorrow and relief.

"Tonks." Harry didn't know what else to say.

"Harry." Neither did Nymphadora.

They looked at each other, no words needed. She reached forward and wrapped her arms around him, he did the same. It felt nice. However, the longer they stayed like that the more aware they became that everyone was looking at them. He broke first and gave her a small smile before turning towards the crowd. "It's over."

It took a few moments before all hell broke loose, at least, that was what Harry thought it was. He mistook cheers of celebration for a frenzy of screams. It took him a few moments to tell the difference.

It then quickly blurred into a flurry of thanks and praises and well wishes. It was nauseating, and Harry went into autopilot. The only ones that noticed didn't say a word.

[later]

Bodies and blood, candles and butterbeer. Everyone was either sorting the dead or drinking themselves to death.

Harry decided to avoid everyone as much as possible. He needed to be outside, he needed fresh air. Even though the Main Courtyard wasn't empty, he also didn't have the effort required to take secret passages.

As he moved through the droves of corpses he saw it again – pink, although even more dull than before, closer to white. He recognised the body she was crying over. One werewolf, one of two men he would grant the title of 'uncle' to: Remus Lupin. Harry placed a steady hand on Tonks' shaking shoulder, she calmed somewhat. "Tonks."

She turned and stared into his killing-curse-green orbs. Hers looked puffy and bloodshot. She looked terrible, and she rarely did. Or she rarely let herself be seen like that.

"I'm sorry, Harry. He loved you."

Harry sat down next to Tonks, wrapping an arm around her steadying shoulders. "He loved you, too."

"It… wasn't the right time. Besides, Remus had enough self-loathing for two people." A sniff, a teardrop. "Plus, the age gap, he thought… it never would've worked."

"This is all my fault…"

As quick as her head turned to face him, the hand colliding with his cheek was quicker. Harry didn't know what was more shocking: the burning, tingling of his skin, or the sound the slap made.

"Don't say that again! Ever! I never want to hear you say that again!"

"It's the truth."

Another slap. Surprisingly, even more shocking.

"You're taking any meaning their deaths have away, Harry! Stop being so selfish! God, the moment I see you as a man you say the most childish thing!"

Now her hair was a blazing red, more than that of a Weasley. Her temper, too. Harry—who was always good at improvising—had to come up with a way to diffuse the pissed off metamorphmagus.

"Tonks, you're right. I'm sorry. It's not my fault."

Tonks stopped in her tracks, her hair returned to its previous dull pinkish-white.

"Oh, Harry, I-I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. After everything you've done."

"No, Tonks. It… It doesn't make it any easier, but you're right. It happened the way it did. I can't change it. I can't bring them back anymore…"

Tonks—who always listened attentively to Harry—picked up on that last bit. Harry knew something. "What do you mean, 'anymore'?"

Harry mentally slapped himself. "I could if I had the resurrection stone. I don't have it anymore."

"What?! Where is it? Don't tell me V-Voldemort got a hold of it." She almost got his name out without stammering.

"No, he didn't get it. It's lost, Tonks, in the Forbidden Forest. It doesn't even work the way people think. It only brings their soul into this world, not a true resurrection."

Tonks slumped. For a second, just one, she thought about her father and what the stone could have done. Now, that too was gone. Harry rubbed her back, almost subconsciously. He finished wrapping Remus in the school sheet. He'd be buried soon, maybe in Godric's Hollow.

"Remus was never there when I needed someone."

Tonks turned, this time gently. No matter how close the two of them were, there were some things Harry never spoke about.

"When I was orphaned and placed on the steps of Hell." A sniff, a teardrop. But this time it was Harry. "So, what if he was out of commission for a couple of days a month, it would've been better than them." Another sniff. "I know he taught me a lot in third year and about my parents, but I needed him sooner than that. And now he's dead…"

It was Tonks' turn to steady his shaking shoulders. He jumped a little at first but calmed. "Shh, it's alright. He wasn't a perfect man, but he did love you. He just thought he could never give you the care you deserved. Don't hate him, Harry."

Those last words seemed to trigger him. Hate. Harry had hate, but not for Remus. No, his hate lied at five specific people: the Dursleys, Voldemort, and most importantly…

"I don't hate him, Tonks, I love Remus. He's the closet thing I have to an uncle. I hate Albus."

Once again, it was Tonks' turn, this time to be shocked. She knew things had been a little uneasy for Harry concerning Dumbledore after Snape 'mercy' killed him. She had no idea he hated the 'greatest wizard of our time'. Harry took a wand from inside his jacket's left sleeve. It wasn't the one he took from Draco, no this one looked like…

"He had it all along. Albus had the Elder wand. Now it's mine." The water blurred his perfect-green eyes. Tonks saw he was hurt. Something had just finished processing in her mind.

"The Elder wand…? The resurrection stone and your invisibility cloak. The Deathly Hallows… Harry, you're the master of death!"

"Am I? Great."

"What is it, Harry? What's really the problem?"

Harry took out another wand: her cousins'.

"These are both mine, but I don't want them. I miss my Holly and Phoenix Core. It fit me, it was right. These…"

"Harry, you have the Elder wand-"

"-I know I have it!"

"Hey, let me finish! It's the most powerful wand ever. Why don't we take it to Ollivander and see if it's possible to repair your Holly with it?"

Flipping a switch, turning on a light, Harry's mood completely changed. He shot up, Tonks unwittingly with him, which almost sent them crashing down again. He pulled her in for a quick, crushing hug. Then it was over as soon as it began. Harry realised where he was, what he was surrounded with, and the mood plummeted. He shouldn't feel so happy when everyone here was miserable. It was just a wand, it wasn't a life. But to the boy-under-the-stairs, it was. His wand was always there for him, even when his friends weren't. Sure, it didn't speak to him, not like Hedwig, but it did communicate. When he felt alone the wand would comfort him, sending warmth. When Hermione revealed its broken, lifeless condition, a piece of Harry did the same. Now there was a chance where he could get it back… and he felt terrible.

"Harry?"

"I shouldn't feel so happy about this, should I, Tonks? It's just a wand."

"It's been with you for a long time, Harry. There's nothing wrong in wanting it back."

"But it's just a wand, it's not a life."

"Harry, when you mentioned the resurrection stone I was going to ask you to bring my dad back. Is that wrong?"

"No, I'd do that too. I tried. Sirius, Remus, my parents… they all said it wasn't right. I had to watch them leave me again."

"Like you said, 'it's just a wand', and now there might be a chance where you can get it back. Don't tell me you want to forever use my greasy cousin's?"

"Not a chance."

"Let's go, then. We've cried enough today. Let's see about getting you a smile."

Harry did right then. It wasn't big, it wasn't playful. It was a small, happy smile.

They left the dead for the moment; Remus was found and prepared for moving. Entering the castle, they went looking for the wandmaker and avoided anyone else.

They found their target at the top of the astronomy tower. After a year of captivity and torture, he was probably avoiding crowds, too. They made their footsteps heard, not wanting to shock the man and give him a heart attack. However, Ollivander seemed to know they were coming, facing them as they came up the tower.

"Rowan, unicorn hair, eleven inches. Suitable for the metamorphmagus, Nymphadora Tonks."

Tonks' hair went blazing red at the mention of her name. However, with a little nudge from Harry, she relented.

"Holly, phoenix feather, eleven inches. Not so curious now, Mister Potter?"

Tonks' hair flared once again. "You're 'mister Potter' but he says my name?"

Harry was getting a little pissed off. Sure, it must have been tough on a kid with a name like Nymphadora, but with the amount of effort and frequency she brought it up, you'd think Tonks was attracting more attention to her name.

"Shh. No, Mister Ollivander, it isn't curious to me anymore. My Holly wand, I wanted to ask you something."

Harry took out the Elder wand. Ollivander displayed more enthusiasm than usual when it came to wands.

"It is it. What a great thing, Mister Potter."

"I want to know if it will repair my broken Holly."

Ollivander pried his eyes away from the wand to actually think about the answer.

"Hmm. Normally, I would say no-" Harry's shoulders drooped. "-But, with the Elder wand, it may be possible." Harry's shoulders rose.

"What do I have to do?"

"Try a simple 'reparo'. If it will work? I'm not sure."

Harry took out the three snapped and splintered pieces from the inside-breast pocket of his jacket. After the snap he kept them there, close to his heart. He probably shouldn't have and even though its light had gone out, it felt right. He laid the pieces down on the stone fall. Everyone kneeled down to see. Harry used Draco's wand and a lumos spell, so they could all see clearly. He aimed the Elder wand, he could feel its anticipation, it wanted to be used.

"Reparo." A gold light shot out, but nothing happened. "Reparo." Again, the spell worked, but the wand was still broken. Harry looked at Ollivander and could feel his blood boil. Tonks could see it and pressed her hand to Harry's shoulder, calming him once again.

"Try again, Harry, but this time, really feel it. You want it to repair, right?"

"Of course."

"Then channel it. Come on."

Harry did as he was told. He felt the will, he felt his magical core, he felt the words, and without saying them, the gold light exited the tip. The Holly started piecing itself together, mending and filling out the missing splinters. When it finished, it looked as good as new. They were all speechless, Harry most of all. There it was, a piece of him taken, now returned. He hesitated to grab it, afraid the illusion would shatter the moment he touched it. His fingers enveloped it and the familiarity returned. It sent a warmth throughout his body. The wand seemed excited to be back as well as it sparkled a variety of colours from the tip, looking more like the end of a blowtorch than a sparkler, though.

"Another great thing, Mister Potter."

"Harry, that was fuckin' awesome!"

Harry didn't say anything. He just smiled. Tonks smiled too.

"There. There's that smile. It suits you."

"Thanks, Tonks."

Harry looked the wand over, a little possessively. It was if he was checking for any defects, any weakness. It was broken once after all.

"Mister Ollivander, I don't get it. There's no splinters, no cracks, no damage. It's like it was never broken."

"Hmm." The wandmaker stroked his chin. "I think it 'reversed' the damage, not simply 'repairing' it. Most curious."

Harry actually couldn't care less about the 'science' behind the miracle, he just couldn't believe his Holly was back. Now he wouldn't have to worry about keeping the other wands in his possession, wands that belonged to others. And despite ownership of the Elder wand passing with disarmament of its current owner, Harry thought it belonged to Antioch Peverell, but that was a long time ago.

"I think I'll keep it."

end of chapter 1