Full Summary: Have you ever imagined being "isekai-ed" before? Well, she's kinda too old to fantasize about that shite. She was still, however, thrown into the world of Naruto unprepared... whilst also being in the body of her game character, which, FYI, is the opposite gender and more than a little crazy in the head.
Warning(s): Slash/Yaoi, Isekai shenanigans, Necrophilia, Disturbing themes, Killings/Murder
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, obviously.
As soon as she came back to the land of the living, she groaned loudly at the brightness of it all. She, obviously, was not at all a morning person, preferring to sleep and laze about all day. Seeing that she wouldn't be able to fall back into slumber anytime soon, she cussed like a sailor on steroids.
Today was finally an off day after working for ten consecutive shifts. So why did she forget the importance of closing the curtains? What an idiot past-her had been! An utter moron. With a grumble about how stupid everything was in general, she forced herself off her (too comfortable) bed and zombie-shuffle to the bathroom. She lived in a modest three-room apartment, so the walk was short and sweet; just the way she liked it.
Due to her occupation as a forensic medical examiner, she was definitely able to afford a better living place. But alas, due to the location of her workplace, there were not many private houses nearby, only towering apartment buildings. Also, she didn't have a license, so she picked the best next option - which was an apartment unit two blocks away from the police HQ.
After a quick shower, she stumbled her way to her game room (or what she liked to call it; her Batcave), only breathing a sigh of relief when she sat her arse on her totally awesome purple DXRacer gaming chair. On habit, she lit up a cigarette whilst switching on her PC. The computer booted up without delay and she was quick to log into her favorite MMORPG.
... What?
You think a middle-aged woman can't enjoy PC games? Bullshite. She has online friends that were over fifty and were still energetically playing online games with her.
Now then...
She cracked her fingers in satisfaction before she moved her mouse pointer, letting it hover over her masculine game character. And yes, she preferred playing as a man. She disliked how sexists and desperate the gaming community was to women, and ever since that one nasty incident during her teenagehood, she has always customized her characters to be male.
... And if she ever missed playing as the fairer sex, she could always force her character to crossdress. Thus the reason why they always have soft features.
Her current character was quite the good looking guy - what with the long black hair, narrowed black eyes, pale skin, and a slightly feminine face that all Uchiha main house members seemed to possess. In fact, she took it upon herself to make her character's features appear similar (if not identical) to Uchiha Indra, but with black hair.
'He' was wearing a pair of standard Shinobi open-toed sandals that reached up to 'his' shins, the latest version of the Konoha green flak jacket, a long-sleeve black shirt with the Uchiha fan sewed on a red armband beside the Uzushiogakure symbol, and a pair of black pants - basically, the standard Konoha nin attire. Though she can't forget the pair of somewhat adorable Christmas mittens that she won in a special event. Don't underestimate them, though, the stats were insane after she upgraded them to their limits!
She was, after all, an upgrade whore and a hoarder of limited edition items!
For those who wondered why her character wasn't wearing the typical high collared shirts that other Uchiha players tend to favor, the reason was simple; she simply hated them. They were beyond boring and she didn't want her darling character to blend in with the rest of the Uchiha population; both players and NPCs alike. So she preferred 'him' to be equipped with the Konoha standard wear since she was still somewhat loyal to her village.
Although she was fond of her village, she didn't bother to equip 'his' Konohagakure headband due to 'him' having the unfortunate status of a nukenin...
Player nukenin, however, were rare in itself. Nobody (and she meant literally NOBODY) wanted to be a nukenin due to the many disadvantages the title brought for them. Having a bounty over your head sucked. To be hunted by both players and NPCs alike was fucking bothersome. And the lack of any important quests (missions) from any major villages? A bloody letdown.
In fact, players would rather re-create their character from scratch than become a nukenin since it wasn't something one could simply stop being. For her, it was accidental, but she didn't have the heart to delete 'him'.
Well, enough of her blabbering.
Mhm. It is as many suspected...! This is a Naruto MMORPG called Naruto Online, inspired by the anime/manga Naruto. It is currently the most popular game on the market - created by the one and only Masashi Kishimoto-sama.
Players were able to create their own customized character, choose whichever village they want to start at, create a complex or simple background for said character, create their own clan or be 'born' into an existing one, team up with two other genin players to co-create an NPC jounin teacher, and many other features (easter eggs) that attracted the fascination of gamers.
Currently, her character - Uchiha Shiki - was the top ranker in the whole game. She even achieved THE legendary Title 'God of Shinobi'. The Title was completely overpowered and one of a kind, but if her rank were to ever drop, the Title would go to the one who overtook her.
There were also (unreliable) rumors about the Title changing to accommodate the player.
For instances, if the first ranking player was a Shinobi that has never failed a single mission before, the Title would change to fit them better - along the lines of "Jack of all Trades, and Master of All" or something equally embarrassing. Geh... chuunibyou syndrome.
The reason why Uchiha Shiki was given the Title God of Shinobi was simple. 'He' evolved 'his' skill tree so high up due to the endless amounts of grinding and real life money spent that 'he' managed to master the Yin Release, Yang Release, Yin-Yang Release, as well as other overpowered Kinjutsu. Those first three Nature Types were attained in three separate (almost impossible to complete) chain quests. And only a player who manages to trigger all of them within the same day would be able to activate said quests, thus allowing her to have an unfair advantage over the other rankers.
Not forgetting how 'he' was personally 'trained' and given quests and skill books by Uzumaki Naruto, the Nanadaime Hokage himself, due to 'his' Title. Truthfully, she suspected that if Shiki had not been a nukenin, Naruto-sama would've made 'him' his official apprentice and candidate for that ugly hat.
But enough of that. It was time for her to play.
Her usual half-lidded eyes were now narrowed in attention as her grin stretched from ear to ear. Her love for this game and her character was genuine. As she controlled Shiki to jump from tree to tree towards the direction of the 'final' dungeon, she changed the settings for PMs and alerts to be blocked, not wanting to be disturbed when facing the final boss.
The moment Shiki landed just in front of the dungeon, the crowd started to flock to 'him'. She heard some players turning on their voice chat to try and gain her attention, whilst others flooded the chatbox with 'pt plx' (party please). There were even a few idiots who had armed themselves as if they were strong enough to behead her for her bounty.
It was annoying. It was bothersome.
With her usual aloofness and antisocial personality, she ignored them all with practiced ease and entered the dungeon on her lonesome. Usually, for normal players, a full squad of 20 was required. For professional rankers, a team of three would do. But for Shiki... He alone was enough.
With a demented grin in place, she pushed her character to butcher each and every one of the NPC nukenin that blocked her path, not forgetting to behead them for their bounties after each slaughter. Their reactions, as always, amazed her. These NPCs all have different personalities. Some stood their ground, whilst others flee upon sight. They were all her prey, however, and she cared not about destroying an opponent that had no will to fight. Call her a coward or a bully, but she loved the feeling of overpowering these almost sentient NPCs.
It thrilled her. She giggled as she clamped her thighs together when she heard the very realistic death screams of the nukenin she hunted down. Ah, their cries always manage to turn her on.
There has been a new update during the early morning just before she woke up, so everything looked twice as realistic. In fact, she just knew that killjoy parents would start to make a fuss about the overly violent graphics and content. For now, however, she would push all of those bothersome thoughts aside. She doubted that this update would last for long, so she needed to enjoy this for as long as possible.
Ahn... she even felt like she was going to cum at seeing the few nukenin express their fear and horror in the face of death.
... Calling her creepy? No skin off her nose. Her colleagues already do. She was a person who cut dead bodies open, remember?
When she finally reached the final boss, she had to pause at what she saw. It was odd. Wasn't the final boss supposed to be Uchiha Madara until the next expansion? Why was there now an NPC with the Rinnegan and Rinne Sharingan standing there instead of Madara?
"... Ĺtsutsuki Hagoromo?" She murmured to herself in bafflement.
What happened next completely left her jaw sweeping the floor.
"The future and peace of my world," The elderly NPC spoke with a grave tone, forcing her to pay attention to his words. "Can I entrust them to you, God of Shinobi, Uchiha Shiki?"
... The fuck? They added a bloody cutscene and/or a chain quest before the final battle?! Did she trigger something by accident?
That... That is bloody brilliant!
She immediately typed a 'Yes', even making her character do a thumbs up Gai pose with shiny teeth and all. Heh.
The NPC seemed to sag in relief, his smile making him look quite handsome (for an old dude) and adorable at the same time. But, to be frank, equally as disturbing with those purple Rinnegan eyes and forehead Rinne Sharingan.
"I thank you, Uchiha Shiki. Now that I know that my world will be taken care of - I can finally rest in peace..." His eyes shone as he spoke his gratitude.
Before she could type out any questions in relating to this utterly fascinating quest, her vision suddenly swam with a kaleidoscope of color. It made her eyes burn, her head pound with vengeance, and her body screaming bloody murder at the feeling of lava coursing through her veins.
With a weak whine, she slumped into her seat and blacked out, not at all hearing the final words of the 'final boss'.