anwyway, back to the actual protagonist, Clarissa.

"Man. I, Clarissa Winchester, am so so so great. I am so amazing. So what flippin awesome amazing stuff can I do today"

She climbed a mountain with her bare hands, went skiing down an avalanche, scuba dived with sharks, surfed with shraks, swam with sharks... then she saw JOHN WINCHESTER inside one of the sharks mouths

Omg dad what the heck are you doing there

"This shark eated me" John sighed

Oh ok bye

There was much sadness at Castiel's funeral. Nobody noticed he died until the funeral was announced. Nobody even knows how the funeral was announced, since nobody knew he was dead except for Rwoena. But anyway they all showed up and cried.

Except Clarissa didn't cry, she was a strong independent woman who doesn't need a man, Especially not her LAME EX ANGEL HUSBAND WHO WORE A LAME TRENCHCOAT.

Sam cried

Dean cried

Gabriel cried

Mary cried

Crowley cried

Rowena, the murderer, cried

Ed cried

Harry cried

Balthazar cried

Garth cried

Kevin cried

Chuck cried

Charlie cried

Ruby cried

They ALL cried.

Then Castiel popped up from his casket HEY GUYS IM BACK TO LIFE AGAIN

he left and went to eat some toothpaste

OMG CASTIEL THAT WAS SO CRUEL Sam punched him, interrupting his toothpaste cuisine.

"Ouch . watch it buddy I'm immortal I could kill you"

"Lol Id like to see you try, anyway... no offence dud but your funeral was lame."

"WHAT how dare you say that!?"

"Um because it was boring."

"But I saw you crying ! "

"Yeah the only reason I cried was because mom made me turn off my video games and come to your stupid dang funeral, and guess waht:? Your stupid dumb lame funeral ended up being dumb! You suck at being a friend Castiel, I can't believe you would die just to make me turn off my video games. You are the absolute worst. I hate you."

" :'( " Castiel wept.