Disclaimer : I do not own Danmachi or anything by Type Moon. They belong to their respective creators who are awesome people. I am just an Oliver Twist, looking in through the glass windows, hoping for more soup. Mmmm, soup.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

Adventurer's Guild, Orario

Sometimes, it didn't pay to be a hero, Archer thought.

Before him, the elfin beauty, one whose ears reminded him uncomfortably of Medea's, glared with all the mighty frown of an unhappy kitten. Or perhaps a hungry puppy.

Either way, it was ferociously cute.

"So, Mr Shirou, was it?" She began to speak.

"Emiya" Archer corrected absently, "being called Mr Shirou makes me sound stupid. "

"Right, right" she agreed cheerfully. Archer relaxed for a moment, before remembering how Rin's agreements were cheerful too..followed by bouts of prolonged and excruciating passive-aggressiveness. "Anyway, Mr Shirou, I have only one thing to ask of you."

Sighing, Archer mentally prepared himself for the inevitable explosion. He was long used to small, petite girls yelling at the top of their considerable lung capacity at him.

He was not going to be disappointed.

"WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?"

As the guild advisor, Eina, continued to berate our hapless hero, he couldn't help but reflect on the circumstances that had led him to this point.

Throne of Heroes, Unknown Location, Unknown Time

The day had begun normally enough. Or what passes for a day, or normal, in the Throne of Heroes. The repository of the souls of heroes and legends who have left their mark on humanity. Many equated it to the Elysian Fields or the Valhalla...but in reality, the afterlife of heroes was a dull affair.

Time and time again, a copy of that stored soul would be summoned, either for the purpose of a holy grail war, or for the defense of humanity or sometimes by an ambitious mage overreaching himself. Once their task was complete, these copies were erased, for lack of a better word, and the vague memories of the events were sent back to the original in the throne of heroes.

These memories were rarely more than a sense of vague impressions on the subconscious, and as such, had no lasting effect on the soul.

Which was why, Counter Guardian EMIYA was surprised when he felt the inevitable and irresistible pull of a summon on his soul. His whole soul, and not just a copy...which made the experience all the more terrifying.

His very nature was defiance. Naturally, he resisted, but the pull of the summon was stronger still.

After several long moments of painful struggle against this unknown force, he gave way for a split second...which was his mistake.

His world had erupted in flashes of all hues of the rainbow, fantastical shades not occurring in nature, and he had felt himself be dragged along breakneck into the beyond.

Archer didn't even have time to lament his misfortune when the speeding colors gave way to solid ground and he grunted as he hurtled into the awaiting embrace of the earth.

Or as anyone else would say, he fell on his ass.

Yes, being a hero was just an exercise in frustration on the best of days.

He found himself in a large town that seemed to be something out of the medieval period. Archer thought with a pang that it resembled the ancient villages and towns that Saber had ruled over as king and wondered if he had found himself in her time.

A notion that was quickly disabused when he saw a cat-eared girl walk by, complete with a swishing tail. Perhaps his eyes had lingered just a minute too long on the offending appendage, but that didn't really merit the glare and the hiss that had been directed his way, did it?

After the initial surprise, he had seen more of such strangeness the more he had seen and looked around. Dwarfs, Elfs, even creatures that distinctly looked like Hobbits or Halflings, Cat Girls, Half Cats, Half Elves, Half-Halflings?

It was a veritable menagerie.

It was when he saw a gigantic man with boar's ears walk past, that he decided that he really needed some answers.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

City of Orario

Naturally, the first place that he thought to look, was the massive tower. In his lifetime, and in his existence as a Counter-Guardian, he had borne witness to many mighty towers, skyscrapers and monuments...yet, this edifice stood taller and higher than anything created by man. His suspicions were proven right by the little-used but very useful skill known as : keeping your ears open. Listening in on the casual conversations happening everywhere in the busy marketplace , he quickly began piecing together information.

'Oh, did you hear about the idiot kid who fled from the dungeon? He was soaked in monster blood through!' a merchant told a customer as he sold him his wares. From that, Archer could surmise that there was a Dungeon, inhabited by monsters...who clearly weren't unique or unheard of, or the people would speak of them with fear and awe.

'Sorry I can't stay too long!' one delicate looking waitress gossiped to her friend, 'Mia told me that Loki familia will be coming down to eat at the Hostess tonight, and you know how rowdy they all can get after a day in the dungeon.'

While the name of this 'familia' was worrisome...because honestly, who names their group after a God of Mischief, Mayhem and Fire? That's just asking for trouble...they seemed to be just a group of people who hunted monsters for a living. He could sympathize with that. As a warrior who lived his life on the battlefield, he understood the joy of unwinding after a day's hard work. Food, wine and women often were the escapes of the soldiers..things that allowed them to feel normal, things that allowed them to forget the horrors of the day past.

Even so, he mentally resolved to keep a wary distance from the inauspiciously named group. They were liable to go rogue at some point, if his life had taught him anything.

He wasn't his naive past self. He wouldn't be left cursing someone's sudden and inevitable betrayal. Like the time he trusted and was betrayed by the Children of Khaos. Or the time he was let down by the Axis of Control. Or the time-...yeah, it was probably in his best interests to stay away from that group.

It was a while before he finally struck gold though.

'I hear Hestia finally got a poor fool to accept her blessing. Never thought that the lazy goddess would ever get a child, you know?' a buxom motherly looking woman remarked to a handsome blonde man who was dressed rather dandily, to put it lightly. He had a hat for crying out loud. A hat! As he passed them by, he almost recoiled. The scent that the two wore was quite overpowering. The woman smelled of freshly mowed grass and of the ground after a rain. The man on the other hand, smelled like the outside, for lack of a better word.

Archer shook his head and picked up the pace as he hurried along. Their eye catching appearance aside, the information that they revealed was far more shattering.

Gods? Adopting humans as children? Just what kind of world was this, that Gods still walked the lands? Had the age of gods never ended here?

That...that changed a lot of things. The presence of gods also meant the presence of sorceries, of ancient magics and unbridled, capricious power. While his own magecraft would be strengthened and indeed, Archer had rarely felt as strong as he did in this new world..it also meant that his inevitable foes would not be as frail as the modern mages.

It also raised the question as to exactly who had summoned him to this land, and why?

Archer just knew, in his heart of hearts, that he would not like the answer.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

Guild Hall, Pantheon, Orario

"Name?" the elf-eared woman asked.

"Shirou Emiya" Archer replied. While he didn't exactly hate his past self as much anymore...he still didn't like being associated with that name. On the otherhand, calling himself simply 'Archer', would just raise pointless questions. He could bear with the name, it wasn't the worst.

"Alright, Mr Emiya, my name is Eina Tulle and how can I help you today?" She asked politely.

"I was wondering what this place is, and if there was something to do?" He questioned, scratching his head. The place seemed fancy and busy, and a steady stream of people kept coming and going, so he decided to take a chance. Surely, in a medieval looking town like this, there was some menial work that could be done. It would let Archer earn a little money, keep himself busy...and if it helped someone, that was just icing on the cake.

"Ah, new to city then? Well, no problem, this is the Guild Hall. We are the ones who watch over everyone who enters the Dungeon."

"The Dungeon?"

"It is a massive labyrinth, located under that tall tower. It's full of monsters, you know, and the adventurers keep culling them to keep the numbers low."

"Alright, thank you for your help. I will be heading there next." He said with a quick bow, dipping his head in gratitude for the assistance.

"W-wha..." Eina spluttered, even as Archer about-faced and began walking out, already planning to explore this place. Monsters, regardless of the world, were dangerous to humanity and killing them was just a public service. He was a little shocked and surprised on finding such a suitable task right off the bat.

"Hey! Wait just a moment! Which God's familia do you belong to? Did you receive the blessing? Do you know how to fight?" She yells, flustered at the strange and abrupt manner that Archer had behaved.

Archer stopped in his tracks, and turned to face her, "I...don't have a good experience...in letting anyone have power over me. No gods for me, Miss. This time, no gods, no masters. I am my own man, and I am going to keep it that way."

He hadn't intended to say quite as much, but once he began to speak, he couldn't help himself.

With that, he turned and left decisively, ignoring the protesting yells of the woman behind him.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

The Dungeon

He had learned that they called it the Dungeon.

Fittingly named. Located under the massive tower, it was a yawning chasm that supposedly had no end. It's very entrance was a foreboding cave mouth of impenetrable blackness. He took one look at the gaping maw that was the entrance. Its darkness seemed to envelope him in an embrace that was absolute. There was nothing to be done for it.

He stepped inside.

As Archer walked in he watched his shadow dissolve into the surrounding darkness. It was dank and the first sound that greeted him was the steady drip of water and moisture from crevice. Other than that, there was an absolute stillness that seemed to echo even the sound of his breath. He could understand why the dungeon was only braved by the hardiest of thrill-seekers. It was a massive unknown...and there is no fear as potent as the fear of the unknown. No monstrous visage discovered yet has been as terrifying as the infinite potential for horror which exists before the mask is removed.

The irony that such a massive cavern existed under the equally massive high-rise tower was not lost on him.

As above, so below.

He walked further into the cave, the sound of his own echoing footsteps, his sole companion. Spires of rock hung from the ceiling and stood erect upon the floor. Faint scratching noises grew in intensity the further he walked, alerting him to the presence of cave-dwelling creatures of some variety.

The shiver that went down his spine was just because of the chilly backdraft. It couldn't be anything else.

Archer followed the unknown trail with a worried expression on his face. The blood-tracks had led him down a trail that had been created by many feet trodding this path. It was obscured by bushes and fallen rocks and sloped down into an unexpected valley.

Once more, Archer found his mind boggled by the sheer strangeness of the Dungeon's architecture. It was wrong. So very wrong.

Nonetheless, he had a purpose to fulfill, so he walked on.

After what felt like an inordinately long time of walking, the man-made path halted and yet another cave appeared. Climbing ivy wound round the entrance of the cave and concealed the jagged opening from easy sight. Inside was dim although the darkness was lifted by the two small braziers that provided a merry, crackling illumination. He had half expected some grim quote or a foreboding warning, something along the lines of 'Ye who enter here, beware'...or 'Abandon Hope, all who enter here' or something...but no. Compared to the dank entrance, this was positively welcoming.

It hadn't been long that he had been walking in the labyrinth that he felt that prickle of warning and danger. Wary, he created his bow out of prana, noting how easy it felt in this new world, without Gaia resisting every spell. Not a moment too soon, as he spotted his foe straight away.

Three rows of teeth, each as sharp as a dagger, nose the size of a fist, dripping with gelatinous yellow streaked snot, flaking around the eyes and nose, a pair of yellow, bulbous, protruding eyes, nails like a sabre tooth tiger's, fangs glinting over rubbery pale gums, ears on stalks, stench of halitosis breath, hands the size of garbage bin lids, barely a few feet tall, small lumpy bald head with mottled greying skin, legs like the trunk of a tree, feet like sprawling roots lashing around. As the ridiculously storybook monster advances, he roars discordantly, like ancient machinery screeching to a halt. The noise set his teeth on edge, feeling like someone dragging nails on chalkboard.

Archer breathed deeply and shot a simple arrow. With a dull thunk, it buried itself deep into the monster's right eye in a spurt of aqueous humor and greasy black blood.

In an instant, the creature was dead...and soon melted away into shadows, leaving behind a dully glowing purple crystal.

Archer felt cheated. Killing monsters in this world was just so disappointing.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

They say great stories happen to those who can tell them. Ais Wallenstein was an exception to that rule. For all her exceptional achievements, and they were many in number, she remained quite curt and dispassionate when talking about them. Something that happened rarely enough to begin with. On the battlefield, she was the very picture of elegance and grace, trading blows with a preternatural ease, her flashing sword culling monsters where they stood, while not a drop of their brackish blood landed on her. But outside of the killing fields, she was inexpressive, laconic and unsocial. To the outsiders, she seemed to be an existence like none other...but those who knew her realized that she was just awkward.

But no one disputed her supreme talents with a weapon in hand, and while neither boastful or modest, Ais knew that she was one of the best when it came to swordplay.

Which was why it was jarring to see this complete unknown putting that claim to the test.

Earlier in the day, after having been forced to end their dungeon expedition because of exhaustion and dangerous monsters like the Virga...Loki familia had retreated back from the 50th floor. While at the guild, waiting for their supporters to turn in the Magic Stones, they had been met with a frantic Advisor, who kept babbling about some newbie heading to the dungeon unprepared and needing a rescue.

Most adventurers were in favor of just ignoring the advisor. Newbies to the dungeon were typically cocksure young upstarts, too proud and believing themselves to be invincible just because they had a Blessing from their chosen God. They usually learnt a sharp lesson within the dungeon within the first few days. The dungeon wasn't a place to mess around in, and getting their comeuppance was good for them in the long run. It wasn't like the first few floors were very dangerous to begin with. Loss of life was unheard of, with the weak monsters and the numerous adventurers who passed through on a daily basis.

Ais too debated just letting the matter be, until she heard that the adventurer lacked a Blessing.

Which meant that he had a very real chance of dying.

So, despite Bete's vehement protests, she had agreed to helping out the Advisor, and had set out to the dungeon once more. She was tired, but it wasn't like the monsters in the first few floors would trouble her any. They would require minimal effort.

In the end, Bete had been chosen to accompany her, much to his chagrin. Everyone else had declined, citing exhaustion, disinterest, injury or some excuse or the other. Lefiya had offered to accompany her, when it was obvious that Ais was not going to change her mind...but Ais had told her no. Lefiya had expended a lot of magic and needed to rest..and if Ais was being honest, she wasn't needed. Ais alone could rampage through a good amount of floors by herself. Bete was only joining her because Lefiya insisted that someone should accompany her as back up. That girl could really be a worrywart at times.

So, the two had set out, thinking this to be a quick job. Bete was already rehearsing his scathingly condescending lines to cow the poor adventurer into submission, Ais was sure. What they hadn't expected, was a trip to the fifteenth floor.

They had spent hours, scouring the early floors for any trace of the unknown adventurer. When it was becoming increasingly obvious that he wasn't anywhere from Floor 1 to Floor 5, against her better judgement, Ais had decided to venture further down.

Bete had noticed the trail of the magic stones, which was strange in and by itself. Magic stones were essentially the standard way for adventurers and adventuring familias to earn money. Each stone could be turned in to the guild and sold for a tidy sum. Which was why Adventurers religiously collected these magic stones left behind by monsters, or hired Supporters to do it for them. To simply leave these stones behind was very unusual in and by itself.

Such a rookie mistake pointed to this being the work of their mysterious newbie...but that beggared the question : just how was a fresh-faced adventurer killing monsters in floor 5 and below?

The only way to get that answer, was to find the adventurer in question. A task that became easier once they started following the trail.

Five, Six, Ten...the trail kept leading downwards and downwards. By the time they had reached floor fourteen, Ais was getting really really worried. Common sense dictated that with each passing floor, the adventurer's chances of survival kept dropping. But defying all logic, the unknown rookie was somehow holding his own...but even a beginner's luck could run out.

Not wanting to find the curiosity dead, Ais picked up the pace. By this time, Bete and her had been in the dungeon for hours, but their patience was soon rewarded by the sounds of raging battle. Ais hurried forward, ignoring the shouts of Bete to slow down. It wasn't just altruism anymore, she was definitely curious and interested, perhaps even invested, in finding out the identity of this rookie.

Coming to a stop, she gazed disbelievingly at the sight before her.

A group of four minotaurs surrounded a single white haired man, dressed all in red. Despite the danger that he was in, the man didn't seem worried at all. He held two strange swords, one in each hand. They seemed to be quality work despite their unfamiliar design, and with a keen edge that was cutting through the monsters with mocking ease. One massive minotaur bore down upon the man, the heavy sword held aloft, slashing down towards the white-haired man's unprotected head. Almost casually, the man sidestepped from the blow and thrust his swords into the opening created as the beast over-extended. With a vicious swipe, the man wrested his blades free, even as the monster collapsed into dust.

He wasn't done however, as he twirled the black blade held in his right hand and threw it through the eye of one charging monster, ducked under the swing of another and cut out the tendons of the creature's legs with a single swipe. As the beast roared and flailed, he ran up the creature's flank and thrust the white blade into the neck, in a spray of black blood. Even as the monster collapsed, he drew out a bow from somewhere and fired three arrows in rapid succession, which thudded to a stop in the minotaur's heart.

Within seconds, all the monsters were dead. The man sighed and wiped off the lingering blood from his face, spitting it out, the disgust on his face clear.

It was then that he looked up and saw them, and seemed to freeze, his eyes lingering on Ais. She wasn't unfamiliar with the adulation, but it felt wrong coming from the skilled warrior in front of her. Before she could comment on it, the moment passed and the man shook his head, before raising it once more. He met their eyes and asked-

"Well, what do you want?" he asked the two. Both of his voyeurs seemed to be capable enough. A single glance at the sword that the Saber look-alike carried told him all that he needed to know. That girl was a swordswoman, there was no doubt it. They didn't seem to be in any danger, but that didn't mean that they didn't need his help.

"We have been searching for you..." the girl said, before glancing to the side, a tiny tiny frown on her face, "...and we are the rescue?" she trails off, the questioning tone of her words reflecting the confusion that Archer felt as well.

He laughed. He didn't know this girl, didn't know where she'd come from at all. He was used to working alone and being sent out to clean up whatever messes that Humans got into. He was even used to working alongside others, rare though it might be... but even as he stood on that forsaken dungeon with his black bow in his hand, he knew that this wasn't what this was. This girl had no intention of asking for assistance or requesting a boon from him. All she had set out to do, was to rescue him.

Strange though the situation was, Archer guessed that he was okay with that.

"I thank you, but as you can see, I am not in need of a rescue." He said simply, holstering his bow. He would have dismissed it...this new world with its immense magic pervading the air allowed him to be wasteful with things like that...but to dismiss it would have been to give away his ability. So, he not only kept the bow around, but also made a show of walking over and picking up his swords as well, from where they lay.

"You asshole!" Bete growled in frustration, "We have spent the past ten hours looking for your sorry ass! Now you are coming back, even if I have to break your bones and drag you out."

"That may be so, but I did not ask you to. This is a choice you made, and you must live with it." Archer said with a faint sneer, looking down on the wolf-boy. "It's not like I do not appreciate the sentiment...I really do...but it was misplaced."

"Why you-"

"Bete, stop." Ais commanded, taking charge of the conversation, as pitiful as it was, "...and we really must insist. People are worried. If we don't come with you, more people will be sent to bring you back." She elaborates, speaking in soft, clipped tones.

"More people? That would mean more people put in danger on my account. Are they really that worried because I came here?" He asked, only to receive a firm nod.

He shook his head tiredly, "Very well then, let us be on our way." He said, striding forward purposefully, before he stopped and turned around, a sheepish expression on his face.

"Er...which way to the surface?"

The trio trudged silently on their way back to the entrance of the dungeon, spending the next few hours burrowing through yet another featureless corridor of the maze.

Back in the real world, it would stand as self-evident that a group of people saying absolutely nothing, by definition, could not be saying any less. Maybe things are different on the dungeon, or maybe Archer had just never encountered it before, but it's clear to him that there are degrees beyond silence. There was the quiet of reflection, of meditation...there was the quiet of familiarity...where a couple of people, well-used to the other's presence...could hold a conversation without saying a single world.

This however, this was a pervasive realm of deafening quiet which, following the cumulative frustration at the wild goose chase, their little group had unreservedly embraced. Constructed out of their collected exhaustion, cemented with a cruel mixture of hunger, thirst and the futility of the time wasted, it quickly became apparent that this silence was stronger than all of them. The challenge of breaking it remained unmet for the rest of the journey.

On the other hand, they made quick progress back, even with the continual monster attacks.

It's amazing how efficient a group of people can be when none of them feel like talking.

It didn't help matters any when Archer learned just which God's familia his two companions belonged to.

It had taken quite a bit of yelling on Bete's part and unamused reasoning on Ais' part before Archer stopped his tirade on his cursed luck for making contact with the very 'secretly evil familia' he had been planning to avoid. Needless to say, not even Ais was up for any conversation after that little outburst.

So, in the silence, they walked on.

After a couple of hours of walking, all of them were sapped to the bone, and more than willing to surrender to the escapism of sleep. At Archer's insistence, they make camp for the night. Bete rested against a boulder, gathering just enough energy to glare at Archer one last time. For his part, the man just rolled his eyes at the childish antagonism, and gave up his space on the relatively comfortable grass to Ais, who accepted with a grateful nod.

Normally, Ais would have been more wary of making camp in the Dungeon, or at the least, would have overseen the guard rotations...but they had been hunting for Archer for the better part of the night, and had been adventuring in high-risk floors for a week before. She was too fatigued to bother or protest anything. She simply laid her head down on the soft moss and closed her eyes.

Everyone dropped quickly enough into a quiet slumber, leaving only Archer awake with nothing but his thoughts for company.

Light, day, sun, even the moon held no sway or meaning in a place where time stood still until the exit. The dungeon, for all it's fantastical monsters and the almost game-like atmosphere among the adventurers, was mentally taxing. 'I've missed this' was the first thought through Archer's head as the sunlight streaming through the windows warmed his face. Curiosity commanded his next actions; "Just how long were we in there? It can't have been just a couple of hours, outside of the little nap you guys took" he exclaims slyly, throwing a glance sideways.

"Couple of hours? Couple of HOURS!? Can you hear this guy, Ais?" the wolfish boy growled ferally. Archer idly wondered if he was rabid. He resolved to test for that disease by a judicious use of a pail of water at the earliest.

"My senses are intact, Bete." the blonde girl answered simply, not looking riled up in the slightest, "I heard what he said."

"And you are fine with it? This dipshit ruined our celebration!" Archer perked up a little on hearing that. Sure, he hadn't set out to be an inconvenience to this annoying pup...but it was a happy coincidence. What were they celebrating though?

"It would have been grand! There would have been roasted meat, steaks, pork chops, lamb chops! drink! music! and the lovely maidens of the Hostess of Fertility! We should have been enjoying reaching the 50th Floor!" Ah, there it was.

"Instead, we were up all night, trying to track this asshole down." he snarled.

"I fail to see the problem, Bete. The food, the drink and the waitresses are not going anywhere. Unless our dear Goddess scares them away from her rowdiness. So we have the celebration tonight..what's the problem?" once again, the blonde girl proves herself to be the voice of reason.

If Archer hadn't respected her skills with her sword and the history that he saw within it already, he would have admired her for her seemingly infinite patience.

"Now you are taking his side. Bah."

As the petty argument continued, Archer tuned the two out, in favor of enjoying the outside once more. As he began heading vaguely in the direction of the marketplace, he was pulled back by a dainty yet firm hand.

"You are going that-a-way" she says, pointing towards the Guild Hall instead of the marketplace

"What? why?" He asked eruditely. He wasn't opposed to going back, but it felt like an odd demand, considering the time she had spent in getting him out in the first place.

"Not the dungeon." she frowned imperceptibly, "Into the guild hall. Your advisor waits."

Advisor? He didn't have any dungeon advis-

No.

No no no no no no.

Now he remembered the helpful woman...Eina...the woman who kept asking too many questions, and who was obviously worried about the newbie adventurers who dropped by regularly.

Newbie adventurers like him.

Crap.

That little elf woman was going to be spitting mad.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

Guild Hall, Pantheon

And that brought Archer to now.

"Are you okay?" he asked her, after she paused to take a breath.

She pointed her finger at me. "Answer my question," she ground out.

"Uh." Archer really wasn't sure what to say. So, he settled on staring at her awkwardly, trying to answer her with the bemused expression on his face.

"No, seriously, Shirou...just what were you thinking, trying to run off into the dungeon, without a weapon, without any training, without even a blessing?" She asked with a sigh, looking genuinely worried. Archer felt a twinge of remorse for worrying her so. The tell-tale dark circles under her eyes were a testament to that.

"I...I wasn't thinking." He admitted, bowing his head in supplication, "It's true, I have no blessing from any God whatsover, but I have skills, I have training and I have weapons. I wasn't in any danger." He tried to reassure.

Eina made a show of pointedly looking him over, no weapons visible on his person, and raised a graceful, inquiring eyebrow.

Archer sighed again, something that was quickly becoming a habit. On one hand, he was loath to reveal his magecraft to an outsider, or anyone really...but unless he showed this woman something, it would make his future attempts to explore the dungeon and help people difficult. He was a reformed hero, for crying out aloud. Saving people was all he could do!

"Here, watch closely..." he muttered, holding his palm outwards, his fingers clasped around the air as if gripping an invisible sword. At the soft command of 'Trace On', a gleaming weapon materialized in his outstretched hand. A simple blade, with no legendary history behind it. Just a good solid weapon, made for a nameless knight in the 13th century, who never used the weapon in his lifetime, instead hanging it up as a decoration. Castle-forged steel, high in quality and make...but a normal weapon all the same.

But in his hands, it became something powerful. In his hands, the steel could reach the potential it had been created for.

"M-Magic? You can use magic without a blessing?" She gasped in surprise...an action that was disconcerting to Archer. How was it, that in a world as overtly magical as this was magecraft such a big deal. So, he decided to bluff.

"I always could, " he said easily, "I was born with the ability to create swords." He gave a few practice swings with the blade to demonstrate his skills, "This is why you didn't see any weapon on me...I create them on the fly."

"That's a very rare skill! I have only heard of elves being able to use magic so naturally!" She exclaimed, her hand brushing her hair off her pointed ears unconsciously, "That changes the matter a lot."

"I thought it would." Archer agreed with a nod, "I am sorry for worrying you earlier...but as you can see, I am perfectly at home in the dungeon."

She hummed in agreement, "I suppose living outside Orario leaves you more susceptible to monster attacks."

Huh. That was news to Archer, but if she was going to assume that his skills were a result of living it rough outside the city, he would gladly accept that backstory.

"Yeah, of course. So...is everything squared off now? Am I allowed to hunt in the dungeons without being hounded by evil adventuring familias?" He asked, just a little acerbic.

Eina had the grace to look sheepish. "I suppose so. While rare, adventurers not associated with a familia are not unheard of, and since you seem to be capable enough, I definitely can make an exception in your case." She replied, already pulling out the forms and papers needed to certify the same.

"Oh and the Loki familia aren't evil." She added, almost as an afterthought.

Archer resolved to his thoughts on them to himself, while keeping his eyes open. No matter what anyone said, there was no way he was trusting anyone associated with the God of Mischief.

Seriously. Why aren't more people doubting Loki and her familia more? Such is the lonely fate of all heroes...looking out for people who were too blinded to see. Or something.

"Alright, if you say so" he outwardly agreed, "Now, if there's nothing else, I'd like to take my leave. I haven't eaten in a while and I am feeling hungry."

"Not just yet, Mr Emiya" the advisor shook her head regretfully, holding up a massive sheaf of papers. "You still have to fill these forms out."

Her cheerful smile wavered on seeing his gloomy countenance and she decided to throw him a bone, "...but once you are done, I will take you out for lunch. It is the least that I can do for you."

Considering his meager (non existent) cash reserves, he bowed his head and accepted. "Thank you, now where's these forms that you need me to fill out?"

In response, she placed the sizeable stack of paper in front of him, then another stack...then yet another. At his aghast look, she replied with a simple "These forms are needed in triplicate."

Right. There were no modern xerox machines or copiers or printers in the middle ages.

...It was going to be a long morning.

~oO No Gods, No Masters Oo~

Hostess of Fertility, Lunch hour

"Ah, Ei-nya!" the cat-eared girl exclaimed, "come on in, come on in! And who is your friend here, nya?"

"Hello Anya, this is Shirou Emiya, and he started adventuring from today." Eina introduced formally, trying her best to curb the excitable cat-girl's...Anya's...enthusiasm.

"oooooooh," she said in delight, and Archer swore that he saw stars gleaming in her slitted eyes, "a new customer! That's great!"

Archer looked non-plussed at that. "I am just here because she-" he pointed his thumb towards Eina, "-offered to treat me for lunch. Whether I come back again, depends entirely on the quality of the food."

Anya's eyes narrowed. "Nyaaaa...is that a challenge that I hear? Are you trying to imply that our food is bad?"

"Certainly not! But I cannot judge if it is good until I taste it, no?"

"You asked for it." She said with a shrug, before calling out loud, "Miaaaaaa~ this guy here doubts your cooking!" before smirking and bounding away in an energetic fashion, leaving Eina and Archer to find their own seats by themselves.

As they settled in, pursuing the menu, Eina pouted a little and looked askance at him. "Was that really necessary? Anya can be a bit...overbearing...but she means well. You didn't have to push that further."

"Maybe, but she was getting on my nerves. Does she have to be this loud so early in the morning?" he complained.

"Mr Emiya, it's afternoon."

He tsk'd and conceded the point reluctantly, "Fine, I was rude and I will apologize. And you can call me Shirou, there is no need to stand on formality."

"Alright then! Shirou it is! Although, weren't you complaining that Mr Shirou made you sound stupid?" she questioned.

He bristled, before looking away. "It does, and I was...but it felt rude to make you call me by my family name, when you are being helpful and even treating me to lunch."

Her bright smile was indication that he had said something right. "Well well, Shirou, it seems like you can be trained after all." She said with an amused grin.

Before he could retort, he was interrupted by a sudden slam of porcelain on wood. A tall, heavy-set woman was standing next to their table, wearing a chef's apron, and evidently she was the one who had slammed the plate piled high with what looked like spaghetti and meatballs in front of him.

"Your food." She intoned, crossing her arms under her chest.

"But, I did not order this! In fact I haven't ordered y-"

"Eat" she demanded.

But of course. After his challenge to the establishment, this was to be expected. On the sly, he did a quick structural grasp on the pile of food, and noted with relief that at the very least, the cook had not spit in his food.

It was a valid fear, especially considering the incident with the moody french chef and his gourmet restaurant in downtown Shinjuku, back in his time. How was he supposed to know that the man would react so unhappily to some minor criticism? Some people just had too thin a skin for their own good.

No sooner had he taken a bite, that he found the table surrounded. Anya, the heavy-set cook, another cat-eared woman, a motherly looking waitress, and yet another elf, this time a blonde, and even the dainty waitress that he had overheard yesterday on the way to the dungeon, all of them crowded the table, as if waiting for his verdict.

"Er...mm, the food is good. The noodle is a little overcooked and the sauce lacks bite to it...but the meat is cooked perfectly. It's definitely passable." He critiques, surprised at it tasting as good as it did.

Contrary to what he was expecting, none of the women seemed happy with this verdict. Finally, after a long moment's pause, the big woman spoke up.

"Alright, you think you can do better?"

"If I have caused offense, I apolo-"

"Save it. Can you do better?" She demanded again.

"...yeah, yeah I definitely can." He spoke after a bit.

"Then prove it. You finish your food, then you come here and cook. If it's better than mine, you can eat here for free for a week."

There had to be a catch. "And what if it's not?"

"Why? Getting cold feet already?" She smirked, "If it's not as good as mine, you will be doing the dishes for a week..."

Alright, that didn't sound too bad.

"...In a maid's uniform."

And there was the catch.

"You know, I just can't take you anywhere. You keep angering all my friends" Eina complained, leaning against the countertop while Archer expertly diced his tomatoes. Already, he had kneaded the dough for the noodles, had minced the meat and mixed it with spices and cheese, and was now about to start working on the sauce. Normally, the sauce was cooked first and was left to thicken and slow-cook for hours, but since he didn't have much time, he was taking shortcuts, changing the cooking order and skipping steps that he usually wouldn't have.

"I wasn't trying to, you know?" He defended himself, "I simply said that I would come back IF the food was good, and it was...but it's not my fault if she thought her cooking was flawless."

"Nevermind that, and what about the Loki familia? You called them evil too, and made them chase you for a whole night."

Archer sighed and started to saute the tomatoes in oil, before adding in water and other spices, tasting the mixture till it was to his liking. Then, he covered the pot, and got started on breading and shaping the minced meat into balls.

"First off, I didn't make them do anything. That was you." He accused, an accusation that Eina pointedly ignored, "Second of all, again...this is Loki! Have you not heard the tales? That god is a manipulative cunning bastard!"

"Er, Shirou-"

"He is a malevolent, unpleasant, selfish creature who causes misery and torment purely for his amusement!" He continued on his tirade, while beginning to fry the meatballs.

"Shirou, let me sto-"

"He brought about Ragnarok, caused the death of his blood-brother, the death of both sons of his blood-brother, and his offspring were the ones that destroyed Asgard, and-"

"SHIROU!"

"What, Eina?"

"I think you are mistaken about more than a few things. For one, Loki is not a he. Loki is a woman..." she trailed off, rubbing her temples as if to ward off a headache.

"...and she is behind me, isn't she?" Archer finished off, stopping his cooking to look at Eina tiredly.

At her minute nod, he slumped. His life really felt like a comedy played for Alaya's benefit at times. Taking a fortifying breath, he turned to face the fuming goddess.

Loki, wasn't what he was expecting. Red haired, skimpily dressed in what looked like a track suit, and with a grumpy expression on her face. He looked her over once and tactfully didn't make any mention of her slight figure and small breasts. Never let it be said that Archer couldn't learn from his experiences with women.

It was mostly thanks to Rin that he knew not to make a comment. Her tirades whenever that topic came up, were legendary.

"So, you seem to assume an awful lot about me, eh? Been reading fairy tales, aintcha?" She spoke in a thick accent.

"Loki. Why are you here?"

"Yep, that's me. I was just here to reschedule and reserve seats for a dinner tonight." She said, "Now, my turn. Who are you now, boy? Which familia are you with, that you dare to speak to me like that?"

"Shirou, Shirou Emiya." He said, turning back to check on the merrily bubbling sauce. Taking it off the heat, he put a potful of water up on the old-style stove and added the noodles. "And I have not accepted any God as my master."

Loki seemed to perk up in interest on hearing that name, "You are the Shirou that my Ais was telling me about! You certainly caught her interest."

"Now, what's this I hear about you not having any Blessing yet? Want to join my familia?" She offered.

"Sorry but no" He said immediately, keeping a close eye on the noodles as they cooked, "I am not going to accept any Blessing whatsoever."

"Why? You have a problem with us gods or something?" She belligerently asked.

"In a word, yes" He said simply, removing the noodles from heat just slightly before they were cooked. They would finish cooking in their own heat later. In a smooth motion, he drew out seven plates and started to plate the food up.

"You gods are selfish. You are graced with immortality, with wisdom, with knowledge...and how do gods use those gifts? By feuding with each other...by luring mortals as their pawns...by finding your entertainment at our expense. Even the most benevolent of the gods have an ulterior motive whenever they choose to help humans...so pardon me if I don't trust the word of a God, let alone the God of Lies." He said bluntly, before setting down a plate of the meal in front of the goddess.

"Anyway, Anya, the rest of you scary ladies...the meal is ready." He said, taking off his apron and hurrying out the door. He wasn't running after mouthing off to a god. Nope. This was a judicious retreat. A tactical withdrawal. That was all. "I will come back tomorrow, let me know your verdict then. And Eina, thanks for the treat."

With that, he bravely ran away.

"That...was quite interesting." Loki commented, as she moodily twirled the noodles around before taking a bite. "I wonder what happened to him to make him hate all the gods so...but damn if he can't cook. Thish ish awshome" she spoke through mouthfuls of food.

"I will agree." Mia, the heavyset woman, commented, thoughtfully eating her own share, with far more dignity than Loki. Not a difficult feat, but still. "I cannot cook anything like this...there's absolutely no flaws in this dish. You will drag him here everyday, Eina, is that understood?"

"Er...what?" Eina was confused at this sudden turn around. Not a minute ago were all of them glaring at Shirou, and now they actively want his company?

Mia chuckled and set down her plate with a thump, "Do you not see it yet, Eina? That boy is something special alright. Just you wait, I know he is going to go places."

Eina was more skeptical, "Are you sure? I mean, he doesn't have a Blessing, but he has training. Granted, that's uncommon, but it's not unheard of, after all."

"Nah girlie, she's right." Loki interjected, "It takes a special kind of stupid to come up to a god and insult them in their face, while also giving them a meal that's as good as anything made by the best of the best."

"At least he had enough sense to run away while he could." she laughed, and Mia joined in too. Even Eina couldn't help but smirk at the joke on Shirou's expense.

"He did run away, didn't he?" Eina commented with a slight grin, gazing longingly at the quickly emptying plates of food. Not even the reserved Ryuu was slowing down for a moment.

"Totally." Loki smirked back.

A/N : So this was it! Let me know if you liked. Yes, Archer is going to be strong, but that does not mean that he is going to be curbstomping everything and everyone. And no, there is not going to be other characters or servants in this. There is not going to be a Grail War in Orario.

Also, I have not forgotten about Bell and Hestia either, and they should be in the next chapter. Along with Monsterphilia, more Trace On, more Archer being awesome.

Also, no ships for Archer planned right now or in the foreseeable future.

Any other questions, let me know, and I will do my best to answer.

Also, while you are here, go check out DragonManMax's The Empty Thrones. It's an excellent Danmachi fic. Oh, and also, Random-O-Panda's Danmachi oneshot.

Next update : Wednesday, 23rd of May (a little delayed as work came up and I couldn't finish the proofreading and re-writing)

Later~

-WarrenDSherman