The Following Trailer Is Rated NM For No Mercy!

From the channel that turned the production of shitty shark movies into a fine tuned art form, comes the final film in the Highlander franchise, that makes the Phantom Menace look like Lord Of The Rings.

Highlander: The Source!

If you thought that it couldn't possibly get any worse than Highlander II, prepare to have your mind blown by a film that does absolutely everything in its power to piss you off.

Enter the future of the Highlander universe, a generic post-apocalyptic craphole pulled straight from the storyboard of Highlander II, which alone is enough to send any Highlander fan running for the hills.

Rejoin Duncan McLeod, an immortal, ageless warrior played by an increasingly aged actor, as he and his immortal comrades search for the mythical source of their fabled immortality, which apparently was not worth mentioning in any of the previous five movies, the six seasons of the TV series, or even that stupid French-Canadian cartoon show.

Resist the urge to smash your television as this sci-fi channel slop fest desecrates everything that Highlander fans know and love. Blink in confusion as you meet Duncan's wife, Anna, a random, pointless, bland love interest that the studio pulled out of their ass instead of the established love interests that Highlander spent six seasons, a spin off show, and a whole movie developing. Weep as fan favorite Joe Dawson dies a unnecessary and avoidable death for no real reason, and then absolutely shit your pants as Duncan's ironic and beloved katana is shattered, to be replaced by a pair of Butterfly Swords; oversized steak knives that look like they belong in the children's toy bin at WalMart.

Finally, lose all sense of restraint, and reduce your $800 TV to dust, as Highlander: The Source restructures the entirety of the Highlander mythos, by claiming that the legendary catchphrase, "There Can Be Only One", refers to the claiming of the bullshit "Source" and not the epic war that is the heart and soul of Highlander, in a franchise betrayal the likes of which have not been seen since Joel Schumacher directed Batman and Robin.

So call your anger management therapist, and strap in for a barrel of bunk terrible enough to make movie buffs reconsider every crappy sequel every made, because compared to this, Rocky V might actually be watchable.

Starring:

The Lamelander- Duncan McLeod

Dumbass Housewife- Anna

Meth Head- Methos

Studio Assisted Suicide- Joe Dawson

Shit: The Source!

I'm thinking of submitting an idea to Death Battle for their next episode. A four way Battle Royale between Highlander: The Source, Jaws 4, Batman And Robin, and The NeverEnding Story III. Let the shitiest sequel win!