Chapter 18 – Good Butt Jeans

(I'm just telling you now, this is like 2 chapters in one.)

As I slung my dance bag over my shoulder I checked my phone and left the club. I needed to let Mr Chibs know I was on my way home so he could unlock the door. There was a text from Mr Lowman on my screen, in all capital letters as usual.

'BE READY TOMORROW 8PM. WEAR JEANS SNEAKERS AND BLACK SWEATER.' Was all it said. I never really understood why he always used capital letters to text me. Maybe he thought I was blind?

'Jeans?!' I replied; tapping quickly with my thumbs but barely needing to look at the screen to type, 'UGH! Can I wear shorts instead?'

'JEANS.'

He must have been awake. He had been working tonight so he couldn't walk me home but ever since those guys attacked me he was extra paranoid about me walking home on my own. It didn't matter how many times I told him I would be ok he didn't let it go.

'What about wedges instead?"

'SNEAKERS. 8PM."

It was Mr and Mrs Chibs' anniversary tomorrow and they had a lot of couple things that they wanted to do so Mr Chibs asked Mr Lowman to 'babysit' me for the night. I had already dropped an overnight bag and Romeo over with Mrs Lowman so he could settle in; I would be completely alone for the night. I don't know what Mr Lowman had planned and he refused to tell me. Apparently it was a surprise.

The light was on when I got home and I knew Mr Chibs would be sat in the armchair waiting for me. I turned the keys in the door and basically fell through because I was so sleepy.

"Shit!" Mr Chibs exclaimed, almost spilling the coffee out of his cup and onto his lap, "I'd gotten used to Romeo telling me when you were home."

"Sorry," I whispered and slipped my sneakers off, "it's weird, huh?"

He nodded and stood up to come over and take all of my bags out of my hands. He looked curiously into my money bag and shook it so all of the bills rustled inside.

"Good haul?"

"Yeah. That businessman from Nevada was in again so," I shrugged, "he always give me loads of money. I really wanna know what he's setting up but he won't say anything. All he says is that he's going to be rich and then asks me to dinner."

"Bastard," Mr Chibs laughed and hung up my stuff on the hooks behind the door next to his skeleton man jacket, "keep working your charm; he'll open up eventually."

"They always do."

But I had literally been trying for weeks to find out what he was doing and listening to the phone calls he made but so far there was nothing. I didn't need to know but not being told made me want to know even more. I was like a kid like that I guess. But I had tried literally everything. I sat on his lap, showed him my chest and put my butt basically in his face and he just didn't do anything. I wondered if maybe he was gay.

"That's my girl. Right, I'm going to bed. Make sure you text Hap to tell him your home or he'll be out here banging on the door in 10 minutes."

I nodded and let him kiss me on the head before telling him goodnight and watching him stomp up the stairs with his little slippers on. He was so cute. I turned to go into the living room to change into my pyjamas and finally flop into bed. I reached to get my phone and let Mr Lowman know I was home so we could both get to sleep. It was so cold in bed without Romeo to cuddle but it would only have to be for one night; I just had to hug my pillow until then.

(((((((())))))))

I dressed in the clothes I had been told too and hated it. I looked like a boy and I didn't have any purses that would even match my current outfit so I had to keep my phone and keys in my pockets which made it look all weird and lumpy. Is this why men didn't wear bags? Because nothing matched their boring clothes. I had to borrow a hoodie from Mr Chibs again. It was just a plain one because he said it would probably be best not to have something with their club name on it. That just made me more suspicious. Mr Chibs was wearing a suit and Mrs Chibs was wearing a pretty red dress and I gasped when I saw them together; they looked so beautiful.

"Be good for Happy," Mrs Chibs said, "don't cause too much trouble."

They looked at each other with a smile before turning to leave. I watched Mrs Chibs back the car out of the driveway and waved at them. I hope they had a nice time tonight; they deserved it. I still had about 30 minutes until I found out what it was I had to wear jeans for. There wasn't really anything I could do in 30 minutes so I literally just sat on the doorstep to wait for Mr Lowman and thinking about what we could be doing. I hated not knowing things. Suddenly I heard the sound of a motorcycle coming up the street and I looked up. He was early.

I always thought that he looked so badass and cool on his motorcycle with his helmet on and stuff. We were in matching outfits today. He didn't come up the driveway like usual and he didn't get off; he just sat there looking at me.

"They took the car," I said and pointed stupidly to the driveway, "so we can't go anywhere far."

"Come on," he gestured with his head to the back of his motorcycle, "we need to go."

"On that?" I moved my pointing finger to him.

When he turned the engine over and climbed off I noticed he was wearing a big, heavy looking backpack on his back. He wasn't wearing his jacket today, only a black hoodie the same as me. I stood to meet him still looking up with wide eyes. The thought of riding on the back of his big, scary machine was making my heart beat in my ears.

"Where's your stuff?" He asked, looking over me until I rattled my sweater pockets, "Ok."

He reached into them and took out the keys and phone to put in the backpack. One of my favourite things about our friendship was that we weren't shy around each other and he didn't think twice about stuffing his hands in my pockets like I wouldn't to him. Then, he dragged me over to his motorcycle by the front of my sweater.

"Put pegs on yesterday," he told me almost shyly when we got to it and pointed to two black stick things on the back.

Before I could say no, protest or even walk back towards the house he had walked behind me and put his arm around my stomach so he could lift me easily, as if he was just picking up Romeo, and put me on the back of his motorcycle. I shouted in surprise but at the same time I was really impressed. I put my hands on the seat in front of me to steady myself because I was worried I would fall off and look stupid in front of him. Mr Lowman didn't say anything and just grabbed my arms and looped the backpack onto my shoulders. Luckily the straps were loose enough that it rested on the seat behind me. He rooted through before I heard him zipping it up and something was put on my head then he started tucking my hair into my sweater.

"What's this?" I asked and looked up as if I could see on top of my head, "A helmet?"

He hummed and made sure the bag was secure on my shoulders before coming around to face me. He smiled when he saw me looking up at him from under the wonky helmet then reached out to tighten it under my chin where I could feel his leather gloves brushing on my skin.

"If you kill me," I warned him and moved the helmet so it felt more comfortable, "I'm gonna be so mad."

Mr Lowman just rolled his eyes and carefully climbed on, making sure he didn't kick me, and reached behind him so he could grab behind my knees and pull me so I was close to him. I squeaked and gripped onto his sweater tightly. I held him with my knees and wrapped my arms fully over his stomach. He tilted the machine and did something with his feet before turning it on. I was pretty sure that he would be able to feel my heart beating against his back and how much I was shaking both with fear and excitement. I gripped onto his hoodie as if that would keep me balanced. When it started moving I held my breath and squeezed my eyes shut.

Eventually, when I did relax, I had fun although I could see why he said I had to wear jean; it was kind of cold. I liked seeing all the buildings and cars going by quickly and he was a really good driver so I stopped being scared quickly. We zoomed smoothly through the traffic and around the corners. I still didn't know where we were going but I also didn't really care. I recognised the street where he lived but then didn't stop when we passed his house. Now I was confused. I thought we might be going to his house he took me streets and streets away to a quiet neighbourhood where all the houses had big yards. They weren't big houses but they were spread so far apart that it made them look huge.

We stopped down another side road that didn't have any street lights and the silence when he turned off the engine hurt my ears.

"What are we-"

But he shushed me and stood up. I wasn't happy about being shushed and glared at him but I doubted he could even see me it was so dark.

"Come on," he whispered and unclipped his helmet, waited for me to struggle with mine and then helped me off.

When I stood up I almost staggered back because I had forgotten about the bag on my back and it was so heavy. He laughed and grabbed my arms so I could steady myself. I'm pretty sure it weighed more than me. He didn't let go of my arm and took me further down the dark street. He didn't even need to hold me because I was hugging his arm really tightly. I didn't understand how a street could be so dark when the one just next to it was at least kind of lit up. I felt the ground under my feet go from concrete to dusty and rocky. I could kind of see some trees against the stars. Was he taking me out here to murder me? I don't think I had done anything to make him angry.

I couldn't even talk; I was so nervous so I just clung to his arm until I saw a building in the distance. It looked like a really run down house. Mr Lowman pulled a torch out of his pocket and shone it over so I could see the tall fence that surrounded it. Beyond the fence was a small, abandoned looking house with the windows smashed and the roof caving in. He gently pulled his arm away from me before scrambling up the fence like a kid climbing a tree then disappearing over the other side.

"Throw the bag over," he told me, "then come over."

I didn't even think that what I was doing was possibly illegal because I was just so surprised. Did he bring me out here to help him break in somewhere? I slipped the bag off of my shoulders and pushed it over the top of the fence; hearing it thump to the ground on the other side. It sounded like metal hitting the ground. I stepped up to the fence and I think Mr Lowman realised at the same time that I did that I wouldn't be able to reach the top to even try and climb over because he appeared back over and held out his hand. Without thinking, I reached up and took it so he could help me up until I was balanced on the top. There were splinters in my hands and I felt like I was going to fall. I don't know how he made this look so easy. Maybe he had a lot of practise.

"Oh my gosh," I gasped when I felt a piece of wood or a nail or whatever go into my pants and heard a ripping noise.

"What?" Mr Lowman hissed, dark eyes looking up at me in worry.

"These are my good butt jeans and now they're ripped! I'm gonna have to buy a new pair."

"The fuck are good butt jeans?" he asked with a confused frown.

"Jeans that make my butt look good, obviously. I'm stuck up here, can you help?"

"Your butt looks good anyway," he reached up to put his hands on my thigh to see if he could free me, "don't need jeans for that."

Mr Lowman had seen more of me than anyone had since I was born I think. I didn't mind because he wasn't weird about it but I understand that it was probably weird seeing your friend almost naked and dancing around. I also told him that he didn't need to only ask me for dances because there were loads of other girls that wanted to dance for him but he turned them down. The girls got really annoyed about that but I found it funny.

"Aw!" I cooed and put my hand over my heart with a massive smile; that was such a sweet thing to say, "Do you really think- oh gosh!"

He had obviously given up trying to get me down gently and just grabbed my arms to then pull me downwards; catching me so I didn't hurt myself before putting me on my feet gently and tugging the hood of my borrowed sweater up over my hair then doing the same with his. It hid his entire face and I couldn't help thinking he looked kind of like the skeleton man on the back of their jackets. When he raised his finger to where I pictured his lips would be I felt my heart thud in my chest. What were we doing? Was he forcing me to do illegal things? Mrs Chibs told me to be good.

"Mr Lowman…" I whispered, voice shaking and my eyes looking up at him with wide eyes.

"Trust me, ok?"

I nodded. I would always trust him.

He let me hug his arm again as he led me over to the house. It was disgusting and had obviously been abandoned for a really long time. There were smashed windows and shopping carts in the yard. I didn't understand why we were here. The door was already opened and when we stepped in Mr Lowman made me stand in the doorway while he went further on into the house. All I could see was the torchlight moving behind things and then disappearing into another room although there must have been a hole in some of the walls because I could still see flashes until one by one the rooms were lit up with small lantern things in the corners. When the whole bottom floor was dimly lit I could see how disgusting it really was in the house.

I squeaked and stepped back out into the yard and crossed my arms. Why would he take me to a place like this? He knows how much I hate dirt and mess and bugs. When he appeared at the doorway his hood was down and he was smirking at me. I was so busy with starting to tell him off that I didn't notice the baseball bat in his hand until he held it out to me.

"What the heck?!" I exclaimed and slapped it away but I only hurt myself, "Are you going to murder me?"

"Come see," was all he said and gestured back into the house, "you'll have fun."

Now I was nervous and curious but I'd be lying if I said the thought of doing something probably illegal wasn't exciting. I walked back in and found him in what looked like it used to be a living room. There was a ripped couch and chairs, coffee table and pictures on the wall. Mr Lowman passed me the bat and I took it.

"You need to let of steam," he told me and pointed to an ugly ornament on the coffee table.

I shook my head. I couldn't do that. I can't break something that wasn't mine. Even if it was mine I wouldn't break it. I gripped the handle of the bat tightly. I had never held one before and it was weird. Mr Lowman stepped back and folded his arms; watching me closely and patiently. I knew he wouldn't take me home until I at least hit the thing. I lifted the bat and weakly hit the ornament but it didn't break or crack, it just fell over with a dull thud.

"Mr Lowman-"

"Try. You'll feel better."

There wasn't even anything wrong with me though so I didn't understand. I took a deep breath, fixed my eyes on the item then swung down again but harder this time. When the bat hit the fake china it burst and shattered into pieces. I hated to admit that it felt good. Mr Lowman was smiling and nodding as he grabbed something else to put on the table. It was an old plate. I did it again and again as he gave me things to smash. When I was in the swing of it Mr Lowman left me to it and started smashing things of his own.

I was in my own world, swinging the bat at random things like the walls, the tables, the furniture and just everything I could find that I thought might be breakable. I didn't even care that it was illegal because it was fun. I made my way into the kitchen, breathing heavily and sweating as I heard Mr Lowman grunting and smashing things in another room. I thought the kitchen might have had more stuff to break. When I did though I saw two canisters on the floor, the same as the ones I used to destroy Mom's car, and the smell of petrol filled my nose. It was like they were waiting for me to see them. The excitement pulsed through my chest and I knew I couldn't just leave them. Throwing the bat aside, I pulled Mr Chibs' lighter from my sock. It was my favourite one; a heavy, zippo style with a skeleton man engraved on the side. I always made sure to keep it filled.

I grabbed the canisters and skipped into where I heard Mr Lowman having fun. When I appeared in the door I could feel the smile on my face. I was so excited I had forgotten he wasn't supposed to know I was crazy.

"Look what I found," I said to him, still panting and bouncing on my toes, "can we?"

"Have at it," he said, nodding and grinning at me.

Immediately I ran back into the living room to get started. Fabric burned quickly and well so I would start there. There was literally no point in starting in the kitchen. I poured just a small amount over the back of the furniture and along the arms. The lighter lit quickly, that's why I liked this one so much, and I stared at the flame just for a second before crouching next to the arm of the chair. It took instantly; spreading first over the arm, travelling up over the top and then down the other arm. I moved onto the couch then the other chair and just stood back to watch it. I loved that feeling; it was like relief as soon as I saw it, smelled the smoke and heard the crackling of the fire burning onto the wood of the furniture. I felt someone standing behind me but I didn't care because the flames were spreading over the back fully. There were hands on my arms, pulling me backwards but I fought them off. This was the second best part.

"I need to do more," I told Mr Lowman and picked up the other canister, "on the other side."

I walked through the smoke of the house, coughing slightly through the hall, to the temporarily clear air of what used to be a bedroom. Instead of burning the bed I stood up on it and threw the gas over the back wall and onto the ceiling. More smoke filled the air as I lit the corner of the comforter of the bed and watched it travel up the dry fabric and the floor before finally going to the wall. I was dragged backwards as the ceiling started burning and this time I let him. If I was alone I think I would have been hurt. The smoke started to hurt my eyes because I was watching wide eyed and excited.

I had never burned anything this big before and I wasn't sure how happy I would be with going back to burning trash cans and cars now. Maybe Mr Lowman would know about more buildings like this.

"We need to go Babe," he said in my ear, brushing the hair away from my neck gently.

I heard the sirens in the distance and I realised suddenly that there was nowhere that I could hide. When I was in the town I knew where all the dark doorways and alleys were that I could easily hide and watch but we were almost in the middle of nowhere. I nodded to him and took his hand as we walked quickly through the house to the back door. The living room was now completely engulfed which made me smile. Mr Lowman crouched on the ground next to the fence and laced his hands together. I knew this move from cheerleading. I put my hand on his shoulder and my foot in his hands. Just as easily as he had pulled me up to get in, he stood and lifted me so I could grab onto the top of the fence and pull myself over.

As I waited for him to join me on the ground I looked around and as the fire spread over the house and the lights from the approaching firefighters lit up the fence I saw the DANGER CONDEMNED: KEEP OUT sign on the outside. He took my hand again and pulled me away but once we were far enough away that we couldn't be seen but close enough to see what was happening I stopped; digging my heels into the dirt.

"Catherine-"

"This is the best part." I whispered, turning to look at my work, "Just until the cops come. Please."

His face was lit up with a faint orange light which made his eyes look so dark and his face so pretty. He looked over my face then nodded; stepping closer to me and joining me behind a dry, dead bush. I knelt on the ground and watched the firefighters shouting at each other and taking out the big hosepipe and working to put out the flames.

"The fire people don't look," I said over my shoulder where he was crouching behind me, "but the cops will. That's why we need to go before they come."

"This is the best part?" Mr Lowman asked quietly.

I nodded. It was hard to explain in actual words but I think that it was because I didn't really control anything in my life right now. I couldn't look after Jack, Mom or myself and I couldn't have stopped Daddy from dying even if I wanted too. I didn't have my own place to live or even my own room; I slept on a couch in someone else's house. Even my wages were decided by the men I danced for. But destroying things and making people work to stop whatever it was I did was satisfying and it made me feel powerful.

"Cops," he said, "we really need to go."

"Can we come back tomorrow?"

"Sure."

I nodded and stood up to run back through the desert then back onto the concrete. He gave me the bag back and it was a lot lighter than on the journey here. I didn't even think about climbing on the back of his motorcycle this time and just held onto him. As we drove down the street about 4 police cars went the other way and it made me smile. Mr Lowman had ducked his head down and I turned my face away from them, just in case.

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His house was dark when we went up the driveway and the dogs didn't even bark. Mrs Lowman must be asleep. On the short drive back I had time to realise that he knew my secret now but he didn't seem to care. He let me climb off first then just sat looking at me.

"Don't tell Mr Chibs," I whispered, looking down at the ground and kicking a stone with the toe of my sneaker, "because he's gonna be really angry."

"Promise," he nodded.

"You don't care I'm crazy? Like, you don't mind me staying in the house with your mom and stuff?"

"You care I killed a guy?"

I shook my head because I had gotten used to that now and I knew he was a good man. I thought about it a lot though and had decided that if he hadn't done that then he would never have met Mr Morrow and moved to Charming so I would never have met him.

"Then I don't care you're crazy. Come on. I'm tired."

I nodded and followed him up the drive and then into his dark house. The sound of two sets of paws on tiles came towards us and I said hello to our boys; asking if they had been good and if they were happy to see me. I think they were because Romeo's tail was wagging and Scrap's butt was wiggling where his tail should have been.

"Momma and Papi are finally home," I cooed quietly to them, "I know, I know, we were gone forever."

They sniffed the gas on my hands and the smoke on my clothes then sneezed and it was so cute. Mr Lowman led me through his house to his bathroom because I think he knew I would need a shower after just being in that house but now I had the smell of smoke in my hair and on my skin. He didn't have the hair problem. I watched closely while he showed me how to use it and then gave me a towel to use.

In the shower I washed the soot out of my hair and cleaned my skin using what I guessed was his shower gel so when I got out I smelled just like him. It was a nice, comforting smell. It was also kind of funny to picture him stood in the store choosing stuff like this; I don't think he really cares but he always smells the same so I guess he liked it enough to buy it over and over. Once dry and dressed in my shorts and tank top I padded into his bedroom. I had only ever seen it once before and remember it being plain and he didn't even have a lightbulb or lamp on his ceiling light. I felt like I should maybe help him redecorate.

"Better?" he asked when I sat on his bed and towelled my hair gently.

I yawned and nodded. He had been hovering in the corner of his room holding a pair of sweatpants and watching me until I held out the towel. He nodded in thanks then disappeared out and I heard the shower starting again. When I turned to look around I saw a fresh hot chocolate on his bedside table in a cute pink cup with flowers on it. It was the one I always used when I visited.

I had literally no idea what he was doing but he was in the shower forever. He didn't even have hair to wash. By the time he was out I had already finished my drink and already snuggled up under his blankets. The pillow next to the wall was really fluffy and comfy and had obviously never been used. It made me feel happy. As I started to fall asleep I heard the shower turn off and the door opening. I opened my eyes and smiled when I saw him stood in the doorway, still slightly wet from the shower, shirtless but holding the towel over his shoulders like a superhero cape. He looked just as beautiful as the first time I had seen his tattoos but now he had a scar on his stomach which made me feel guilty just looking at it.

"You took so long," I mumbled sleepily and reaching out to him, "I missed you."

Mr Lowman apologised quietly then stepped into the room fully but didn't shut the door so the dogs could come and go when they wanted.

"You're so pretty," I continued as he pulled his duvet over and got in bed, "it's not fair."

"Shut up," he chuckled and settled himself down before turning off his bedside lamp.

"I'm serious! You're the most beautiful man I have ever seen and I'm happy you're my bestest bestest friend. Even if you have killed someone."

"And you're an arsonist."

I hummed and nodded although I doubted he could see me in the dark.

"Not an arsonist though," I said and yawned, closing my eyes and snuggling in as I drifted off to sleep, "I looked it up on the internet. It's called, like, pie mania. Pie oh maniac. Pie…"

"Pyromaniac."

"Yeah. That's it. They say I should get help but I like it. I'm gonna show you my scrapbook because I worked, like, really hard on it and no one can see it."

I was talking about the scrapbook of different newspaper articles about the fires I had set and interviews with the townspeople. Everyone was nervous and people were scared their businesses would burn down but I would never ever burn down anyone's livelihood that they worked so hard on.

"Tomorrow," he said quietly.

I hummed in agreement again and fell quickly asleep when I felt his arm move and his hand in my still damp hair; he knew that it made me relaxed. I could kind of hear him saying something but my brain didn't take it in. I just assumed he was talking to the dogs.

(((((((())))))))

I was woken up really suddenly by the sound of my phone and Mr Lowman nudging me awake so I could answer it. I held out my hand so he could hand it to me but all I got was thin air.

"You're literally so annoying," I groaned and sat up so I could lean over him to get my phone from his bedside table, I squinted at the bright screen and saw it was Jack, "Hello? Jack? What time is it?"

I flopped back down to my side of the bed and closed my eyes again.

"It's like… 7am. Cat, can I ask you to do something?" Jack asked nervously and I nodded, "It's… it's the parent-teacher thing tonight and since Mom has gone AWOL… Can you come instead?"

I opened my eyes slowly and looked over to Mr Lowman to see that he was looking at me curiously. I nodded; letting him know that Jack was ok so he could stop worrying.

"Sure. What time is it?"

"Thanks," he breathed a sigh of relief, "I just… The teachers are really getting on my back because Mom and Dad didn't come to the last one and if no one comes to this one then I'm gonna get in shit. It's at 5 tonight. Is that ok? I can ask if they can change their times-"

"5's good. I'll be there, don't worry. Be good in school and I'll see you tonight, ok?"

"Thanks Cat. I'll see you later."

I said goodbye and hung up before yawning again. It was way too early to be awake. I gave Mr Lowman my phone to put back and rolled back over to go back to sleep but he wasn't going to let me.

"What was that? He ok?" He asked from behind me.

I basically told him the entire conversation and explained about how Mom has abandoned us so I was technically Jack's parent now. That's why I needed to get us a place where we could be together again. I know he was safe and happy with Aaron and his family but I wanted to make sure myself. Even though I spoke to him on the phone like every other day or whatever it wasn't the same as seeing him in person. Besides, I kind of missed living with him but I would never tell him that though; I needed to keep up the whole big sister thing.

Even after half an hour I still couldn't get back to sleep so I gave up. I hated waking up before I wanted too because I could never get to sleep afterwards and I think Mr Lowman was the same. He was being annoying today. He literally didn't move even though he knew I wanted to get out; he just lay there and watched me struggle. All I wanted was to get dressed.

"Can you just move? Stop being annoying."

He grabbed onto my ankle as I stood to step over him. He was smiling though which made me smile too. I liked it when he smiled; he was so pretty and it made him look a lot less scary.

"Fine," I laughed and sat back down to crawl over the end, "if I'm staying over more often then you're gonna have to move your bed away from the wall."

"Who says I want you back here?"

"You love me. Obviously you want me to stay over again."

He didn't say anything to that and just watched me rooting through my bag. I was used to him looking at me by now though. It was like I was his favourite thing to look at sometimes. I understood in the club and stuff when I was dressed up in my sparkly costumes, big shoes and looked pretty but when I was just in my pyjamas with messy hair and no makeup I didn't understand it. I also learnt not to look back at him because he got embarrassed that I caught him although he pretended not to be.

I greeted Mrs Lowman when I saw her on my way to the bathroom and she was going into the kitchen. She looked happy to see me. once I was wearing my normal, non-boyish clothes and heels I stepped back into Mr Lowman's room without thinking. I immediately wished I hadn't though because he was midway through getting dressed himself. He wasn't naked but he was definitely not fully dressed. I had never seen his legs before which was kind of a weird thought. Maybe I just assumed he just wore sweatpants under his jeans.

"Oh my God," I squeaked and jumped back; slamming the door shut, "I'm sorry."

I heard him laughing quietly but he didn't say anything. My face was all hot but I was frozen in the hall. I didn't want to go and talk to his mom while I was blushing because then she would ask me why but I couldn't just stand outside the door because then he would come out and see me. My feet shuffled and I just decided to go talk to his mom because I could always just say Mr Lowman embarrassed me or whatever.

"Are you hungry, Princesa?" Mrs Lowman asked, looking at my cheeks but not saying anything, "I have some pancakes. Happy says you like those."

"Please! I love them. They're, like, my favourite food right now. What do you have with them? I like syrup and blueberries."

Mrs Lowman shook the little container of blueberries at me then put it on the little dining table. I helped her to plate up the food because she was having trouble with holding the heavy looking pan. I put the pancakes on the plates and she decorated them. She made a smiley face with bacon on what I assumed was Mr Lowman's plate.

"He always liked this when he was a boy," she told me and chuckled, "he would always say, 'Look Mama, it's me!' He used to be cute, believe it or not."

"He was? I can't imagine him as a kid," I laughed and turned to put the food on the table but jumped and gasped when I saw Mr Lowman leaning in the doorway and looking between us with a smile, "He's being annoying today, Mrs Lowman. Tell him."

Mrs Lowman hit her son lightly with the folded towel she was holding and said something in Spanish to him which made him breathe out a laugh. I thought maybe I should learn Spanish because people would maybe hire me for jobs that weren't dancing if I knew another language. Maybe they could teach me.

"Are you sitting?" Mr Lowman asked and I realised I was just stood in the middle of his kitchen while I was thinking.

I put the food I was holding on the table and made sure that his pancakes were the right way around and he smiled down at them. He was still cute but I didn't want to say anything. Romeo came skipping in with Scrap behind him and sat at my feet; they knew I was the weakest one and couldn't resist sharing my food with them. Mr Lowman almost never shared his with the dogs.

"Do you want breakfast?" I asked them excitedly, in a high pitched voice, "Do you? Yes? Yes?!"

I laughed as the higher my voice got, the more excited they got and Scrap was shuffling on his front feet. I fussed him and then Romeo before standing to find the dog food cans in the bottom cabinet under the sink. I shared some out in different bowls and put them on the ground for them.

"Are you thinking about children, Princesa?" Mrs Lowman asked me and I looked around at her confused before she explained, "You are just so good with your boys. Maybe you would be a good mother."

"Oh… I don't know," I said vaguely and put the can in the trash then thinking better of it, washing it out and putting it in the recycling, "I haven't really thought about it since we moved here. When we lived in LA it was kinda expected, you know? Like, I was gonna marry a rich guy and have a baby and just be a housewife or whatever but I think I want something different now."

I shrugged. Daddy always said I would need to marry a rich man because I had expensive taste but he would maybe set me up with someone he knew so I didn't have to make any decisions. I never decided anything for myself back then but I'm way more independent in Charming and I preferred it. Mr Chibs was really good with that because he would let me talk at him about different things until I made my own decision; he never told me what to do but he did give me good advice. And he never told me he was going to set me up with one of his friends or business people either. He told me that he literally didn't care what I did as long as I was happy. I was happy by myself for now because I had good friends and Mr Lowman.

"And anyway," I continued and sat back down, "I'm gonna be living with Jack soon and that will be bad enough."

(((((((())))))))

We spent the entire day together and it was the best thing ever. On the way back to Mr Chibs' house we went to the condemned house so I could see it again. The feeling of going back and reliving it was almost as fun as doing it in the first place. There was loads of police tape around it but we just went under it and looked around. The living room was the worst; the furniture just looked like skeletons and there was a huge hole in the ceiling. I pointed out my favourite parts to him and he just kind of nodded and made agreeing noises but then showed me his favourite parts too. He liked the way the walls in the kitchen were almost all black with smoke except for under where the pictures and stuff were. When we were back home, Mr and Mrs Chibs were still in bed so I could show him my scrapbook and he was really impressed with it. I'm not sure if he was impressed with the articles or the decorations I put on all the pages. I'd like to think it was both. He really liked the page with the one about the fire outside the police station.

I was sad when he left though. I liked being with him; he made me happy and feel not crazy. Like, I could finally talk to someone about everything and he didn't judge me or tell me I needed to get help or whatever like the internet told me to do. I was just getting ready to start walking to the school when I heard the sound of a motorcycle outside. when I opened the door I saw him parking up where he had last night and looked at him confused.

"I can't go anywhere," I told him over the front yard, "I've got to go to the school."

"Yeah," he shrugged and slipped his backpack off his shoulders and pulling out the other helmet before holding it out to me, "get on."

I looked down at my pretty dress and high shoes. I wasn't sure how good of an idea it was.

"I'll come get you."

He went to stand up off of his seat which made me think of the way that he grabbed me last night and I was kind of tempted to be stubborn just so he could do it again but I was wearing a dress and I didn't want to show the whole neighbourhood my underwear. I shut the door behind me to go over to him.

"I'm wearing a dress, Mr Lowman," I said when I was closer, "and high heels. Last time I had warm clothes on."

"You look nice."

I blinked in surprise. He looked just as serious as he usually did but he had complimented me so much over the past two days. By so much I mean, like, twice. He moved forwards in his seat as if to make room for me to get on then started to take off his leather jacket and handed it to me before he unzipped the hoodie he had been wearing underneath it. I patiently waited to see what he was doing then was left holding his sweater.

"Put it on."

"Oh! Thanks."

The sweater was all warm and snuggly from when he was wearing it and I tried to climb on as gracefully as possible. It was harder to get comfy when I was trying to keep my dress from flying up and my feet kept slipping forwards on the pegs. I held onto his t-shirt as he drove towards the school. There were a lot of cars in the parking lot but it was easy to park a motorcycle. He helped me off again; holding both of my sweater covered hands while I swung my leg over. He also stood in front of me so no one could see up my skirt.

"Cat! Happy!" I heard Jack shout, "Over here!"

We looked over and I saw Jack stood with Aaron and Mrs Lawson. Ugh. I hated her. I waved and Jack jogged over to us. He hugged me which was a surprise but I laughed and hugged him back anyway.

"You look so cool. Can I have one of those sweaters?" He asked Mr Lowman who nodded with a smile, "Are you coming in too? I told my teachers you might."

"Jack-"

"Oh come on Cat, he's like my big brother now."

I saw the small smile turn slightly more kind and I couldn't say no. I nodded and waved to Aaron, ignoring Mrs Lawson, and followed Jack into the school to sign ourselves in. Some kids shouted over to Jack and I told him to go because we could find our own way around with the little map from the nice receptionist. There was a list of 7 teachers that we had to go and talk too, starting with his homeroom teacher.

I put the 'VISITOR' sticker on the middle of Mr Lowman's chest on his t-shirt and patting it for good measure. He was so solid.

"Ok," I said and looked at the map, "his homeroom is this way. Mr Grieveson. Let's go."

"After you."

I nodded and took his arm before turning to wave to Jack and his friends who had already been looking over. They all waved back enthusiastically which made me laugh. The school was a lot smaller than the one I went too and Jack's old one. Some of the things were slightly run down but the teachers seemed like they were trying their best with what they had.

There was someone already in the room so we had to wait outside. I bounced on my toes. I hadn't been in a high school since I left so I felt weird. I hated school because I wasn't very good at any of it except for gym, dance and music. All the main subjects were horrible and I failed almost all of them but I had high hopes for Jack because he's so clever.

When the other parents came out they looked at me weirdly then up to Mr Lowman with wide eyes. He didn't look like he cared though; he just tugged on one of the curls behind my head so it was stretched out before bouncing back to normal.

"Are you Mrs Duke-Dillinger?" Mr Grieveson asked me with a confused look over my borrowed hoodie and high heels, "For Jack?"

I didn't think my outfit was that bad today. I know the hoodie didn't match but I had it unzipped so you could see my nice dress underneath it. Then I realised why they were giving us weird looks. They thought we were Jack's parents.

"Miss," I corrected, "I'm Catherine, his sister, and this is Happy. He's a close friend."

"Oh! It's nice to meet you. I thought you looked a little young to have a 15 year old son. Where are your parents?"

I hesitated. I wasn't really sure what to say. I couldn't say that Daddy was dead and the last time I saw my mom was months ago in the hospital then she disappeared. I just told him that they had been away on business for a while but we didn't know when they would be back.

"We, myself and the other teachers, are just very concerned about Jack," the teacher said once we were sat down, "and his living situation. He's living with another student, if I recall? With Aaron Lawson and his family?"

"That's right," I nodded and shuffled in my seat, "yeah."

"Why is he not living at home with you?"

I felt like I was in trouble and even though I was a grown up and had been out of high school for a long time it was like I was having a meeting with one of my teachers. I didn't know what to tell him because I didn't want Jack to be taken away from me. I know that they would take him to a foster home or something if they found out our situation. They wouldn't care about me but there would be trouble for him. I didn't want him to be uprooted again and put in another new school and have to make more friends.

"Our house… um…"

"They got burgled and it was trashed," Mr Lowman said for me, putting his hand on mine that I hadn't even realised had been tugging and wringing the hem of my dress around, "so Jack lives there and Catherine lives with a friend. There's cops and shit in their house."

I looked at him in a way that I hoped was thankfully and then nodded at the teacher. I was so glad Mr Lowman came with me now.

"I'm so sorry! Jack never said anything- I just thought you were having trouble with him."

"No Sir. I'm looking for a new place for us both but it's hard to get somewhere close enough to the school and we have a dog so we need a yard and houses in this town are so expensive."

I held Mr Lowman's hand tightly instead of pulling on my dress and his thumb rubbed over the back of my hand gently. It was comforting. I didn't know it was going to be this stressful. I got grilled some more by this teacher then the time was up and I had to move on to the next teacher. When we were out of the classroom and the door had closed I went to hug Mr Lowman. I felt so stressed. my forehead was on the visitor sticker and my eyes were squeezed shut tightly. Being a parent was hard.

"It's ok," he mumbled to me, stroking the back of my head, "who's next?"

"Math teacher. It should be good. He's good at that."

I pulled back and got the map out again before leading him through the school. All the teachers said the same thing; he needed to do better. His grades had been dropping, his behaviour had gone down and he never did his homework. He had gotten really bad. Jack used to be a really good student but since moving here he had just started misbehaving and rebelling. I know it was because of the family stuff. I was just blaming myself and felt like a horrible big sister.

After the last meeting I felt deflated and sad. The teachers had given me armfuls of work that Jack had to catch up on. I needed to get a house and I decided that the next house that was in my budget would be the one that we moved into. I needed to watch him.

There was a small crowd gathered and kids cheering in the entrance hall when we went out to try and find Jack and when I saw who was in the middle of the circle my heart sank. He was in there with another boy, face covered in blood and hitting him angrily. He was shouting and screaming at him, things I couldn't hear over the shouting. I looked around and the parents were just looking on like they didn't know what to do even though there were two teenage boys trying to kill each other in front of them. Luckily though Mr Lowman was there because he didn't think twice. He barged through the circle of kids and took both boys by the back of their shirts; ripping them apart and pushing the boy Jack had been fighting with backwards. The crowd had gone silent as soon as he stepped into the circle then the whispers started.

Happy/3rd Person POV

Jack was used to his friends having crushes on his sister and making comments about her. He knew she was pretty but what he had never had before was someone coming over to him and showing him a picture of his pretty sister wearing nothing but lingerie stuffed with money on a stage, kneeling down in front of men and smiling. She was barely recognisable but he knew it was her all the same.

"That's your sister?" Brian asked with a snort as Catherine and Happy disappeared down the hall, "I beat myself off to her every night, dude."

Jack saw the picture and then he saw red. He swung his fist and cracked the other boy square in the nose; making blood explode down his face. Brian wasn't as big as Jack and he wasn't as strong but he defended himself pretty well. People gathered around and, even though they didn't know what was going on, they cheered anyway. They were cheering for Jack because no one liked Brian and everyone liked Jack.

Before he knew it there was a strong hand on the back of his shirt and then on his chest and he saw Happy stood in front of him. He had his back to him because he had pushed the other boy roughly out of the way. When he turned to look at Jack he looked over him, as if checking he was alright, then looked down at the dropped phone with the picture of Catherine still on the screen. No one had seen it, the fight distracted everyone, and picked it up.

"Take him outside," Happy said to Aaron as he saw the angry tears building in the teenagers eyes; he knew Jack wouldn't want to cry in front of the people that had been cheering him on, "I'll finish it."

"Come on Jack," Aaron said to Jack gently, taking his arm and putting his arm over his shoulder, "let's go."

Happy turned back to the other boy. The look that he had probably thought was badass and tough had dropped instantly and he just looked like a kid. Happy held up the now dark phone.

"Who took it?" He asked and the boy whimpered, "Who?"

Brian knew who Happy was. The people who didn't know who he was knew he at least looked threatening and dangerous while he was stood there in his Sons of Anarchy kutte and pissed off expression.

"My- my dad. He saw her at the club and-"

Happy snapped the phone in half with his hands and handed the pieces back to the boy.

"You or your dad disrespect my girl like that again I'm gonna come for you, get it? Tell him. He ain't coming back to that club."

"I'm a kid-"

"You think I care?"

Then there were gentle hands on his face and then pushing him backwards away from the boy. Happy kept his eyes fixed on the kid for a couple of seconds more before he looked down at Catherine's kind eyes and worried face.

"Jack's ok," she told him, nodding slightly, "don't worry. He's ok."

Happy nodded and put his hands on her upper arms as if to ground himself then let her lead him back through the crowd and outside. Jack was stood with his head on Aaron's shoulder and hugging him tightly. Catherine was holding his hand as they walked and he liked that. Jack looked up as they approached and nodded at Happy. Jack was going to tell Catherine about what happened.

"We're gonna take a walk to the diner," Catherine said to him, "if you wanna meet us there? I'm buying you boys dinner."

"Sure," Happy nodded, "I'll get the table. Four?"

He looked at Aaron to check if he was coming and nodded when Aaron did. Catherine smiled at him but she looked sad. She was a good big sister but the meetings and seeing her brother had made her feel bad, he knew it just by the way she looked so defeated after every teacher they saw. The things the teacher had said about Jack made him think of the way he was in school and the way Mama must have felt when she went to his parent-teacher conferences. If Jack kept going the way Happy had there would be trouble and it would break Catherine's heart. He was going to talk to some of the guys and maybe get him help.

"See you soon, ok? Thanks for coming in with me. I don't think I could have gone on my own," Catherine said gently and hugged him tightly.

He patted the back of her head and nodded. He would always be there for her when she went through difficult times. She pulled away from him and stepped back with her hands covered with his sweater. She looked cute in his clothes. It made him happy. He wanted her to wear his sweaters and shirts all the time.

"See you." Was all he said and turned to get on his Harley.

At the diner he grabbed their table. The one they would sit at sometimes after she had done dancing at night or when they went for breakfast in the morning. It was the one on the corner next to the big windows because she liked to watch all the people walking by. He always liked to see her with that soft smile on her face and pointed out all the men she had seen at the club before. He didn't think she would be smiling much that night.

"Coffee?" The waitress asked with a fake smile.

Happy nodded and asked for two glasses of coke and a sparkling water with lemon for when the other people got there. When they arrived Catherine looked like she had been crying and Jack's face had cleaned up. She pointed over to where Happy was sat and went to the bathroom.

"So," Jack said when he and Aaron slid into the booth, "when are you gonna ask her out?"

"Like, for real," Aaron nodded solemnly.

Happy looked between them with narrow eyes. Him asking Catherine out wasn't the issue of the night. They were here to get Jack back on the behavioural straight and narrow.

"You're basically together anyway. The only thing you're not doing is fucking."

He was about to tell Jack off for talking about his big sister like that after he had just got into a fight when another boy had been just as vulgar about her when Catherine slipped into the booth beside him and sipped her drink. The truth was that Happy thought about fucking her more than he would care to admit. It was especially bad the night before. The look of excitement and glee on her face as she watched the fire she had set swallowing the house was almost more than he could deal with. But when they went back to his house and she was so casual and comfortable. Even the way she sat on the edge of his bed, towelling her hair dry in her damp, slightly see through tank top was sexy to him. Her butt looked great in the shorts she wore to bed and he couldn't help staring at it whenever she wore them.

"I just want you to do well, Jack," Catherine sighed finally and rested her elbows on the table, "you're so smart. I don't want you to waste it."

"It's just… with everything that's happened, you know?"

"I'm sorry I've not been there. But from now on we're gonna meet up every night and I'm gonna watch you do your homework until we get a house. ok?"

"So you're gonna help me do it?" Jack asked.

"You know I can't help you," Catherine said and rolled her eyes as she sat back then crossing her legs; making the skirt of her dress ride up her thighs. Happy couldn't stop his eyes from drifting downwards, "I'm not good at that stuff."

Aaron had caught Happy looking but he wasn't embarrassed, even when the kid folded his arms and raised an eyebrow at him. Happy just smirked as the waitress came back over to take their food orders. Everyone but Catherine ordered the double beef burgers and cheese. She had cheese fries instead.

"Mr Chibs might help," Catherine continued, "and I heard that Mr Elvis is good with Math."

She was so fucking adorable when she got confused. Catherine had refused to learn Bobby's name for a really long time but when she heard someone call him Bobby Elvis she got excited; she liked to sing Elvis songs, and thought that it was his real name. She wouldn't admit to liking him but she wasn't as nasty to him as she had been in the past. She always said that Kozik was her favourite but Happy knew it was him really.

"Or maybe Tara! She's a doctor so she's, like, really, really smart. Right, Mr Lowman?"

Happy nodded but he wasn't sure if any of the guys would be willing to help them. Chibs, like Happy, was too far gone to distance himself now and it was uncertain if he could even if he had the opportunity. It was no secret the he used Catherine as a substitute for his own daughter and he genuinely cared about her. He had discussed her ties to the mafia in New York with Happy at length and they were both in agreement that she had no idea about it. Catherine was sweet and kind and highly protective of the people that she loved if the way she faced down Clay while Happy was in the hospital was anything to go by. Chibs had also brought up the way she had attacked him when he was fixing Jack up after Jerry had hurt him.

They would be just fine if anyone was to come for them.

(((((((())))))))

Everyone for Happy indulging Catherine's need for setting fires say "aye" – AYE! A nice long chapter for everyone today! I hope you enjoy it!

Did we notice that she referred to Happy as something other than her friend? What do we think to that? And Happy putting pillion pegs on his Harley just for her? Adorable if I do say so myself.

And can we talk about Catherine's psycho-fire scrapbook? Cute and scary!

Anyway. See you in the next one and I'll see you on the flib side.

Love always, Doe xxxx