Part Seven—How to Be: Loved

This is it, people! The conclusion of How to Be. I think this one's longer than the other six put together! Love it, hate it, let me know.


"Stay married? Stay married?!" Stephanie shrieked as she continued to hit Hunter. He wasn't really hurt from the 'blows' but even so…

He grabbed her fists and pulled her to his chest. "Yeah. Would it be so bad? To be married?" He asked again.

"I have nothing against the fine institution of marriage. I just don't want to be married to you!" She yelled in his face.

He grimaced. "Well, Steph, that's just too bad, now isn't it? For better or worse, remember? I'd say this qualifies as worse but…" he trailed off.

"Not for long! I'm calling my lawyer. He'll fix this!"

"Just like he 'fixed' it the last time?" Hunter said snidely. "Our lawyers made a mint off of us the last go around."

Stephanie froze. "Hunter—God, please, don't be an ass about this. This—this is just a stupid mistake! Don't make this into something it's—it's not."

"What do you think this is?" Since he figured she was somehow stunned into submission he cautiously released his grip on her. Stephanie rubbed her wrists absently, and he winced.

He hadn't meant to grip that hard.

"I don't—this doesn't mean anything, Hunter." She said this calmly, like she was talking about the weather, or some equally mundane topic…nothing like their marriage.

He narrowed his eyes. "Are you still drunk? Because unless I missed something important here, we're married. I'd say that qualifies as, oh, I don't know important."

"Shut up! Stop saying that!" Stephanie told him.

"Stop saying what? It's true, we're married. You saw the tape!"

He would not yell.

He would not.

Yelling never accomplished anything with Stephanie, it only made her yell back.

And he didn't want that…

Yet.

"I said to shut up! Why aren't you shutting up?" Stephanie pushed away from him, tried to get up from the bed but in her agitation got twisted in the sheets and hit the floor with a hard 'oomph'.

He wouldn't laugh.

He bit the inside of his cheek to steel that resolution.

He didn't figure laughing would go over really well right about now.

God, I love you, you clumsy woman. His heart skipped a happy little pattern in his chest, and he felt a curious sense of contentment as he watched her get up off the floor.

She glared at him, but he did his best to look innocent.

Innocent, strangely enough, was never one of Hunter's best looks. He always looked like he had just swallowed some kind of bad fish.

Stephanie chose not to say anything, instead tried to gather the tiny strands left of her dignity together.

"Hunter." She began.

And stopped.

"Hunter. We—" She thought again. Tried to put it into words, what she was feeling. "This was just…a mistake. A horrible, horrible mistake that we made when we weren't at our best. We were drunk and neither of us knew what we were doing. And that's all there is to it. It's not like we really meant to get married."

Hunter sat silently.

"Right?" She prompted.

But…

In that moment she wasn't quite sure what she wanted him to answer.

And that scared her more than anything.

"No. No, that's not right." He said finally.

Time to put the cards on the table, boy. He told himself.

He was going to tell her…tell her what?

That he loved her? That he still loved her? That despite everything they'd put each other through, he loved her more than anyone on the face of the planet and probably always, always would? That this past year he had thought of her every day, dreamt of her every night, except for the nights he couldn't sleep at all because he couldn't stop thinking about her?

He could.

He could do that. He could tell her all of that…and then…

It would be up to her. And he could finally, finally have some peace, either way because damn it, at least he had tried, he had done everything he could do.

He opened his mouth, to say it all but instead what somehow came out was:

"I work for you now, you know."

What the @#%$?!

"The hell you do." Stephanie snorted. The intense mood of their conversation of a few seconds ago was quickly dissipating.

"No, no, I really do!" Hunter said, warming to the subject. "Your dad and I signed papers. I'm now signed to Smackdown."

Stephanie blinked. "This—this isn't funny. What the hell are you talking about?"

"I really don't know anymore." Hunter confessed.

Stephanie sat on the edge of the bed. "Why?" She asked softly. She wasn't looking at him, just stared at the floor.

She was looking at so intensely Hunter looked down himself just to make sure there wasn't something down there.

"Because I can."

She laughed but it was…hollow. Distant. "To what, Hunter? Torment me? Try and make my life a living hell?"

"No! Why would you even say that?"

Oh, damn, he was yelling now.

"I don't know Hunter! Just because you seem to enjoy it an awful lot!"

"I never enjoyed it. Not with you, Stephanie."

She looked at him now, blue eyes glaring hatefully.

He almost cringed from the look.

"You put on a hell of a good show of it then." She told him.

"You—you hurt me. I hurt you back." He whispered.

Stephanie choked back a sob. "I hurt you? I hurt you? God, Hunter, that's rich…you—"

He couldn't take it anymore, he couldn't believe her. She was actually trying to pin everything on him, but it was a revisionist history at best.

"You shut up, now." He told her. She glared at him and opened her mouth again but he quickly crawled over to her and placed his finger to her lips.

"I mean it. Don't—don't do this, not now. You are going to listen to me for once in your life. You are going to hear me, damn it. And when I'm finished, then, then you can talk." He didn't wait for a response.

He'd been wanting to say these things for a year now.

"You lied." He said simply. He saw her eyes flare again but she didn't speak. "When I came back from the surgery, you realized things were falling apart between us. But instead of trying to fix them, you lied. Lied about the most sacred thing, ever. You took what you knew I wanted so badly and you used it to get me to do everything you wanted. And I fell for it, I fell for it so hard, and so fast because I wanted it so badly to be true. God, Stephanie, you knew just the button to push and I fell for it because it was you. You told me you were having our baby—do you have any idea what that does to a man? It changes—just everything."

She swallowed. Closed her eyes a moment. "Can I talk now?" She said and he detected more than a hint of bitterness in her voice. He forced himself to nod.

She leaned closer. "I was desperate. Can't you see that, now? I can understand your anger then, but it's been a year. I'd hoped—"

"What? That I'd forgive you?! Time heals all wounds and all that bullshit?!" He exploded, rose to his feet. "I don't believe you!"

"No! No, that wasn't what I was going to say! Just—just, God. Why have we never spoken about this before?" She muttered almost to herself.

"It wasn't for any lack of trying on my part." He said.

She looked up at him sharply. "Yeah, right. You tried really hard to talk to me." And now the bitterness in her voice was in full force.

"Of course I did. You know that. But you never bothered to acknowledge any of my phone calls, or my letters, so I don't even know why I even give a damn!"

He turned his back to her, decided to search for his pants. He thought he remembered Stephanie throwing them in the corner…ah, there they were.

He didn't realize Stephanie had stopped breathing altogether behind him. Didn't realize she'd come up to him until he felt a soft hand gripping his shoulder.

"What are you talking about?" She asked.

He shrugged into his pants. Ignored the fact they were wrinkled beyond repair. "You know what I'm talking about." Now…his shirt…he thinks they ripped off the buttons but he'd hold the thing together himself if he had to, he just had to get out of here.

"Pretend that I don't. Pretend I don't know what it is you're talking about and just tell me."

Something in her voice made him hold himself still. He turned slowly. Looked at her.

Watched as her breathing became shallow, her fists clench. Her eyes watered, face turned white.

"The phone calls." He enunciated, as if he were talking to a very small child. "I didn't leave messages the first few" (dozen, really, but there was no reason for her to know that) "—times but I left them for at least five or six" (twenty, thirty—but she already knew that, damn it!) "—times. But you knew that already, you just chose to ignore them."

He didn't understand why it was so important for him to be looking at her right this moment.

God, she looked like…she looked like he'd just handed her the stock options for the entire WWE and she didn't know quite what to do with them exactly.

"You ignored them, Stephanie…" He prompted again, wanting—no, needing to hear her say it now…

"Letters." She said fiercely. "You said—letters. Oh, God." She sat on the floor, looked up at him. He looked down for a moment and then sat across from her.

"Letters. Three of them." He enunciated.

She. Knew. This.

She had to, had to—

Oh, God. "I wrote you letters. I wanted—to talk to you. In the last one I asked you to meet me and—" He broke off suddenly, thought about the hours he'd spent at that damn restaurant, waiting like a fool and still not able to believe two hours later that she really hadn't shown up.

"I never—I never got any letters." She told him. He shook his head. No. No, he wasn't falling for this, he wasn't believing this. It was all just—no!

"I never got any phone messages either." She whispered. She stared at him. "I swear to God, I swear, Hunter…I never got anything! I thought—"

"What?"

"I thought you didn't care, that you'd never be able to forgive me! That you just wanted me gone!"

"You—"

"That's why I was so angry about it! Do you really think I gave a damn either way about your money? It was just a way to—to stay in your life, somehow! I wanted to provoke you, to just get you to start talking to me again. God, Hunter! I did everything I could think of to just get to you and you refused to even talk to me!"

"But I did—I—"

"I know that now! I can see you're telling me the truth, I can, but Hunter, I Never Got Any Letters. Or calls, or anything, tell me you believe me!" She knelt next to him now, her eyes shining with tears she refused to let fall.

"@#%$." He gasped. "You mean—this was all—"

"A misunderstanding. You tried to communicate, if I would have known, I would have done anything, anything at all, do you understand that? But I. Didn't. Know."

He ran his hand through his hair. Breathed out. If she was telling the truth—and she was, there was no doubt about it—this changed everything.

"We've lost so much time." The words she had just uttered finally broke through to his brain.

"We won't lose anymore." He promised and pulled her to him, kissed her. She wound her arms around his neck. "What happened?" She asked.

"I don't know. We'll figure it out later. Right now, I just want to kiss you."

She pulled away, looked at his face. "You know it was my father. Had to have been. He intercepted them somehow and--" She said seriously.

He was glad the look in her eyes wasn't directed at him.

"He would be the obvious choice. He's always hated us together, always hated the fact you were in love with a lowlife like me—"

She waved it off. "No, no it was never anything like that." Seeing the doubtful, disbelieving expression on his face she quickly amended that statement.

"Okay, well, that was a part of it there. But the bigger part of it was that he was always...afraid of us."

"Afraid?"

"Of what you and I could accomplish. Of what you and I could create together. You and I—we're unbeatable when we're on the same side, you know that, don't you? Because he sure as hell did. God, when I think about how nice he was, after the wedding, after—he was playing me the whole time."

"Are you going to give us a chance to test that theory out again? That we're…unbeatable?" He asked, voice teasing, but utterly serious.

"If you'll let me."

"We still have a lot of things to talk about, you realize."

"Yeah, but I want you to kiss me now." She flicked her tongue along his neck.

He laughed and stretched out an arm to the radio. "Some mood music, to better seduce my woman with." She laughed as her tongue licked a trail down his chest, to his navel…

A song was playing, he recognized it immediately, it was on all the time. He started to turn it but her hand stilled him.

"No…" She whispered, "Leave it on."

"It hardly fits the—ah—mood..." He gasped when her tongue trailed across his stomach.

"It fits mine perfectly. Whenever I heard this song, it always made me think of you, of us. It's fitting that it's playing now. Kind of brings things full circle, if you ask me. And we need to do something about these pants!" She laughed, tossed her head back even as she unzipped them again.

She was so beautiful. He heard the chorus of the song in the background but it barely filtered through what Stephanie was doing….

Livin' my life in a slow hell
Different girl every night at the hotel
I ain't seen the sun shine in three damn days
Been fuelin' up on cocaine and whisky
Wish I had a good girl to miss me
Lord I wonder if I'll ever change my ways

I put your picture away
Sat down and cried today
I can't look at you while I'm lyin' next to her
I put your picture away, sat down and cried today
I can't look at you I'm lyin' next to her

I called you last night in the hotel
Everyone knows but they won't tell
But their half-hearted smiles tell me
Somethin' just ain't right
I been waitin' on you for a long time
Fuelin' up on heartaches and cheap wine
I ain't heard from you in three damn nights

I put your picture away
I wonder where you been
I can't look at you while I'm lyin' next to him
I put your picture away
I wonder where you been
I can't look at you while I'm lyin' next to him

I saw you yesterday with an old friend

It was the same old same "How have you been?"

Since you been gone my world's been dark and grey

You reminded me of brighter days

I hoped you were comin' home to stay
I was headin' to church

I was off to drink you away

I thought about you for a long time
Can't seem to get you off my mind
I can't understand why we're living life this way
I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways
I just called to say I want you to come back home

I found your picture today
I swear I'll change my ways

I just called to say I want you to come back home
I just called to say, I love you...come back home

"I love you Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley." He breathed out.

She smiled sleepily against his chest. "I love you too, Mr. Helmsley."

The two of them were almost asleep when…

"I'm not letting you divorce me ever again." She told him almost as an afterthought.

"Okay." He agreed happily.

"Okay, as long as we're clear on that."

"We are."

"Good. Wanted to make sure."

"Clear as crystal."

"Hunter—"

"Go to sleep already! I'm trying to figure out how we're going to get back at your father. Showing him our videotaped nuptials will be only the beginning, I can promise you that much."

Stephanie laughed. "We're soulmates, you know that?"

When her breathing indicated she was truly asleep he finally whispered: "Yeah, Princess..."

"I do."


~Fin~