Chapter Three

It's crickets chirping, fireflies glowing, and a cold beer in my hand.

I put the kids to bed an hour ago and I'm relishing in the rare silence of a Saturday night after a day of hard yard work. I'm leaning back in a lawn chair and eyeing the shimmering stars overhead and smelling the freshly cut grass.

We didn't have any of this in Chicago.

Not quite like this.

I close my eyes briefly and pull a deep breath in through my nose, soaking in the cooling humid air.

I love and hate the summer months here. I love the easy feeling it brings, the time outside with the kids, the way everything slows a little. I love all of that but I fucking hate the southern heat. It's too damn humid. It's sweat soaking through my clothes constantly and the girl next door wearing too little too often. It's me looking at her in a clinging swimsuit this afternoon and hating how my gaze hovered longer than remotely appropriate.

I feel like a right asshole for taking notice at all but how could I not?

Bella is seventeen but I wouldn't know it if I didn't know her. She speaks and acts like a woman ten years her senior and looks at least a few years older. 'She's an old soul,' her mother had told me once in easy conversation.

She was right on that without a doubt.

Despite my internal reservations about it lately, Bella's maturity has been nothing but a godsend for my family thus far. She's easy to talk to and I know that I can trust her completely with the kids. She's proven that in spades by now.

I'd interviewed countless applicants to babysit Max and Daisy when we first moved here. After I got the job coaching and teaching at the high school, I knew that I'd need someone to watch the twins most afternoons. I'd been in a pretty pissy mood one day after another bad interview with an overly flirty coed when Charlie had suggested his fifteen-year-old daughter. Unsurprisingly, I had been hesitant at first. I take the care of my kids very seriously. They're my whole world and I hadn't interviewed anyone under eighteen up to that point. But then I met Bella and I knew, despite her age, that she was the right one for the job. Even then she was a girl beyond her years.

I take another swig of my beer and lean back a little as the chair creaks beneath me.

Thinking back to that time is a flood a memories, good and bad.

It was a time of pain and uncertainty and terrifying newness. It's a lot of things I'd rather forget.

Looking back now, I know that moving back here two years ago was the best decision I've ever made.

It had been Alice's suggestion after the fallout.

"You need a fresh start." My sister had said.

God was she right.

Living in that house after she left…it was hell, nothing but wilting memories and nightmares.

Another pull, it's cold and refreshing.

Her face flashes in my mind as I swallow it down. Her golden hair and the way it almost shimmered in the pale moonlight. The freckles peppering her nose, the ones I loved to kiss. The bright smile she wore under the fireworks that Fourth of July before it all went to shit. I wonder if she knew then what she'd do less than a month later.

"Fuck." I breathe out and clench my eyes closed tight. I can't think about all of that again, not now. I'm trying to relax and I can't do that if I'm filled with rage.

When I open my eyes again I catch a flicker of light to my right. My tired gaze shifts up and I see the source of my distraction.

A light in a window, it's drawing my eyes in like a moth to a flame.

I know whose room it is.

It's directly across from mine and I've seen her reading in the window seat there more times than I can count. She reads a lot, more than I do for sure. Jasper taught her for British Literature last year and mentioned on more than one occasion what a good student she was. I believe it.

My eyes glaze over as I look up to the yellow box of light and my mind floods against my will again with memories of her from this afternoon.

Her tan legs.

Her sunny and innocent smile.

Soaked waves of brunette falling over the smoothest shoulder.

I snap my eyes away before I let my mind run away any more and pull a hand over my face.

I'm just as bad as that insufferable twit, Mike Newton.

It's the beer, I tell myself. I'm at the bottom of my third bottle and I'm never as sharp buzzed, as I am sober. That and the fact that I need to get laid. A dry spell lasting over two years is enough to make me stiff after watching a commercial for the Kardashians.

I take one last gulp, emptying the glass bottle in my hand, and shift to stand when my cellphone buzzes on the table beside me.

My sister.

"Alice." I answer quietly, a smile pulling against my lips.

"Brother dear." She's giggly and I wonder if she's had as much wine as I've had beer.

"Are you and Jas getting tipsy and watching Netflix again?" I ask with a chuckle.

"Maybeee." She draws out the word and it's answer enough.

"To what do I owe the pleasure of your call?"

"Well…I was wondering if you're free next Saturday?" The question is innocent enough but I can hear in her tone that she's up to something.

"Next Saturday…" I pause for a moment to think through my beer-fogged mind and swat at a mosquito on my arm. "I'm chaperoning the Homecoming dance."

"What if I told you that Jas is willing to sub for you?" She's too giggly and I know that something is definitely amiss.

"I mean…" I'm grasping at straws trying to deflect whatever she plans to throw at me. "The twins? I'm sure Bella will be at the dance. It's a big deal for seniors."

They're empty words. I'm not sure if Bella is really the type to go to the dance or not but I'd already thought of the possibility when I found out I'd be chaperoning. I'd entertained the idea of asking my parents to watch the kids but hadn't called them yet.

"I could watch them." Her voice is bright and I know it's because she loves the twins but also because she's one step closer to success in whatever scheme she's trying to pull.

"Okay just tell me what you're getting at Al." I sink a little more in my seat and shift my gaze to the stars.

"Not one for suspense big brother?" Her playful tone is as grating as it is endearing.

"Al." My voice is warning but I'm smirking small on this side of the phone.

"I have a friend from work that I want to set you up with." She rushes the words out.

"Alice."

"Her name is Victoria, she's twenty-five, successful, and she's super hot. She does Pilates, so you know I'm not lying. She's also a red head, which I know isn't usually your thing but maybe it's time to try something new." She's speaking her words like an auctioneer, not giving me enough time to reject the proposal she's apparently thought out so well.

"Al-" I try to interject again but she's not having it.

"Edward I know what you went through. I was right there with you and the kids through it all…and it was the absolute worst. I get that. And I don't expect you to be over it yet. But it's been two years…"

I clench my eyes closed as she speaks. When I open them again I catch a figure walking past the glowing window above. It's quick and from this angle I can't see anything really but my mind still thinks her name without my consent.

Bella.

And then my eyes are clenched again and my hand is in my hair and over my face.

"Al-" I try to break through but I know it's no use.

"…and I think it's time Edward. I really do. I think you're holding yourself back and I know that you're happy with the kids and your job but I'm sure it gets lonely. And I think if-"

"Okay! Alice, okay!" She stops short at my interruption.

"Okay?" She sounds disbelieving but I can hear the ever-present smile in her voice.

"Yes, I agree." I sigh and lean forward, elbows on my knees and eyes to the ground.

"I don't know if I'm ready…but I might as well try."

"Yes! That's the spirit." I can practically hear her bouncing up and down.

Alice tells me she'll text Victoria's number to me and give her a heads up that I'll be reaching out. She's talking more details with a cheerful tone and I can feel my stomach twisting and churning. The thought of letting anyone into my life in that way after her feels impossible and I'm nervous as hell. Terrified, if I'm honest.

I've given it my all once before - My trust, my love, my life and it was all so easily betrayed and abandoned. How can I risk that again? How can I risk putting them through that again?

Those kids, they're nothing but trusting and innocent goodness and I can't let just anyone into the bubble I've made to protect them.

"Edward…" The sound of my name pulls me from my thoughts. I haven't heard a thing she's said in the past five minutes. "Are you still there?"

I clear my throat before I speak. "Yeah, sorry."

"Look…" She pauses and sighs but her voice is softer when she speaks again. "I know you Edward, so I know that you're overthinking this right now. But I honestly think it's time to try to move on."

I'm sighing now and the humid air feels less fresh and more suffocating.

"I know Al…"

"I'm not asking you to bring her straight home to the twins or to jump right in again…I just think you work really hard and you deserve something fun and new in your life and I think Victoria is a good person to help." She pauses and it's silence through the line. "She really is a nice girl Ed. I think you'll like her. I wouldn't be trying so hard if I thought otherwise."

"I know, and I appreciate it."

"So you're okay with this?" She asks, still quiet and sounding less confident.

"Am I okay with my little sister playing matchmaker? No, not so much, but I'm willing to give it a try."

She laughs again and it brings a small smile to my lips.

"Good. And maybe one day you'll finally admit that I know best?"

"Psshht." I scoff and chuckle and the earlier tension is gone with the summer wind. "Not a chance."

Alice and I hang up soon after and I'm left with the crickets and the fireflies and the rambling thoughts in my mind.

Dating…the idea feels so foreign to me now. I haven't dated since high school, almost ten years now. I honestly never thought I'd have to again. I feel my chest tighten a little at the thought but it's quickly replaced with resignation.

I'm over the hurt of it all. I'm over the naïve notion that she'd change her mind, realize the giant fucking mistake she made, and come back. I'm over her.

I have to be,

I stand from the lawn chair and feel the damp grass squish under my bare feet.

And then my eyes glance back once more on their own accord.

Bella's window is dark.

I shake my head away and trudge to the back door before images of my underage babysitter curled up in bed can intrude my thoughts.

And I think that Alice is right.

Maybe this Victoria woman is exactly the type of fun I need in my life.


Author's Note: Hello again and thank you for reading! So, I think you guys may have noticed that this chapter was in Edward's POV. I read your reviews and tried to take your concerns and requests regarding Edward's point of view into consideration when writing this. I wanted to give a little more insight into his mind and his backstory without overlapping the story line or giving too much away. (Hopefully I did that?) This is also the reason why this chapter was a little bit shorter. I like mystery and intrigue as much as the next reader and I wanted to keep a little bit of that. Not to fear though, I've already written the next chapter and it is a good bit longer, so you have that to look forward to! I'm also thinking of adding an EPOV every 2-3 chapters. Do you guys like that? Do you like his POV at all? Let me know what you think please! Your reviews inspire me!