A/N:

-Without going into spoilers too much, I want to point out the M-rating is there for a reason. This story will feature some sexual scenes and themes of gaslighting/manipulation/paranoia will appear.

-There is quite some sexual content in this story, but the real smut scenes only start from chapter 13 onward.

Kotonoha looked up from her book.

How strange.

She was certain there was someone looking at her. Or rather, she had been certain. People were rather good at detecting when other people were looking at them.

Yet, now that she looked around on the train, she caught no one staring at her. Everyone seemed focused on looking outside, reading, or looking at a fixed point that had nothing to do with her.

Her eyes fell onto one boy in particular. He was staring outside as he listened to his headphones. His arm casually held the metal bar to keep him upright on the moving train.

For some reason, he looked vaguely familiar. But then again, he was wearing the uniform of her school, so she must have seen him before.

But he was clearly not interested in her, so she looked back down.

The feeling returned immediately. As if it was simply waiting for her to avert her eyes.

There was someone watching her, she was sure of it. This dark feeling didn't stop. She could simply feel eyeballs burning into her body. The hairs on her neck were standing upright and cold sweat ran on her back.

With a sudden motion, she jerked her head up to look straight at the boy.

He sensed her eyes on him and turned his head towards her. There was a confused look in his eyes.

Kotonoha immediately looked back down. She could feel her cheeks getting hot.

Of course he wasn't looking at her. Why was she behaving so silly?

She tried to focus on reading, but her eyes simply scanned over the words without picking up any meaning.

"You okay?"

She yelped. Her book slipped through her fingers on the floor.

Kotonoha crouched down to pick it up, but the boy was faster.

He held it out in front of her. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

"No, I… thanks." She accepted the book.

"Malazan huh? Interesting choice." He straightened his back. She noticed he was quite a bit taller than her. The boy had a mop of black hair and sand-colored eyes that looked permanently bored.

"You know it?" She got up from her half-crouch.

"I do," he said in his calm voice. "I have read all ten of them. I'm Itou Makoto by the way, class I-3."

"Ah, uhm. Katsura Kotonoha, class I-4." She made a little bow.

The train slowed down abruptly.

Kotonoha felt herself losing balance, but before she could fall, a strong hand wrapped around her waist and steadied her.

She looked up. Itou Makoto was holding her waist with one hand, and the bar with the other.

"Be careful," he warned her. His voice was very casual. As if he held up girls like that every day.

"Thanks."

"This is our stop by the way." He got out of the train.

She seemed to awaken from a spell. Right, their stop, she had to hurry.

Kotonoha quickly grabbed her bag and slung it over one shoulder.

She jumped out of the train right before the doors closed with a hissing sound.

"You're a bit of an airhead, aren't you?" he said. Itou-kun was casually waiting for her on the platform. He ran a hand through his hair.

"I…"

"Sorry. I didn't mean to offend you."

"No, no, don't worry about it. You're right, I wasn't paying attention at all."

"Shall I walk you to school?" he offered. "I wouldn't want you to get lost."

She couldn't tell if he was mocking her. Nor did she know how to reply to that. But no reply was needed apparently.

"I'll take that as a yes then."

He took her hand and guided her through the mass of people.

"I-Itou-kun. You're…"

He stopped. "Is something wrong?"

"Don't hold my hand please."

"Hm? Oh, sorry," he released her hand. "I was just worried you'd get lost."

"I know the way to school. I'm not a kid."

"Of course not, sorry. Shall we?"

She nodded.

They walked on. A strained silence fell between them.

"I'm sorry," she said eventually. "I may have overreacted a bit."

"Hey, don't worry about it. A random stranger holding your hand, if I was a girl like you, I'd be a bit scared too."

"But you were just trying to help."

"It's really no big deal. By the way, are you gonna keep waving that book around?"

"What? Oh, of course not." She noticed she was still holding her book in her left hand.

With a blush on her cheeks, she put it in her bag.

Really, what was up with her today?

"I'm really not that clumsy normally," she assured him. She didn't know why she said it.

"Am I distracting you?" he asked.

"No, no. It's not you. Thanks for helping me out."

She somehow managed to trip over something.

Itou grabbed her waist with both hands to stop her from falling. She had to clasp her arms around his neck.

"Anytime, Katsura-san."

"I…"

Their faces were suddenly really close together. If he turned his head a bit sideways he could kiss her and she would be unable to stop him.

"Uhum," she removed her arms from him and stood up properly. "You can release me now."

He retracted his hands. "Are you sure you're alright?" He looked genuinely worried.

"I'm fine."

She looked down. Somehow, one of her shoelaces had gotten loose even though she was certain she had tied it properly this morning. So that was how she had tripped?

With a sigh, she crouched down and tied her lace properly. Just in case, she made a triple knot.

When she straightened again, she felt her head go light.

"You look a bit pale. Maybe it's best if I-"

"No, I…"

The world was spinning before her.

She felt his hands catch her again. It was becoming a habit.

"Katsura-san?"

She vaguely registered him lifting her up in a princess carry. Then, she lost consciousness.

"Katsura-san? Are you awake?"

She slowly opened her eyes.

"Where am I?"

"Nurse office," the boy said calmly. "How do you feel?"

"Dizzy." She sat upright. Only now did she register she was lying on a bed. Someone had removed her blazer and bowtie and opened up some of the top buttons of her blouse. When she looked down, she could see her salmon-pink bra.

Her hands instinctively covered her chest even though he could hardly see anything. "Did you…"

"Of course not. Who do you think I am? The nurse did that. She said it was important you could breathe alright."

"Oh, yes, of course." She closed the buttons again. "Did I miss something?"

"You fainted for about half an hour I guess. The nurse said you have anemia." He handed her her blazer.

She nodded. "I know."

He was silent.

"My throat feels dry," she said.

"Hold on." He walked to the sink and returned with a glass of water.

"Have you been sitting here all the time?" she asked as she accepted the glass.

"Helping girls in need is a hobby of mine," he joked.

She smiled faintly. "Glad I could assist you then."

Kotonoha drank up the water.

It was strange the nurse wasn't here anymore. Maybe something had happened somewhere else.

"Anyway, we should be going back to class." She stood up and grabbed her bag.

"Your bowtie," he said. He handed it to her.

When she accepted it, their fingers touched for a second. She felt a strange attraction between them.

"I'll walk you to your class," he said.

"You really don't have to."

He chuckled. "You're funny. It's not optional, Katsura-san. I could never forgive myself if you fainted again on the way to class."

"I'm not gonna faint again."

"How do you know that?"

She sighed. "Fine, I'll allow you the privilege of walking me back to my class."

Itou-kun laughed. "I'm honored, Princess Katsura."

A very strange sensation went through her body when he called her 'princess'.

"You okay?" he narrowed his eyes. "That may have been a bit presumptuous."

"You're not gonna apologise for every joke, are you?" she shot back.

Kotonoha slung her backpack over her shoulders and went outside. He had to hurry to catch up with her

They walked to her class in silence. It only took a minute to cross the short distance after all.

"I should be going now," he said. "Can you take it from here?"

She nodded. Was he messing with her? They were literally standing right in front of the door.

Was that the correct use of literally? Or was-

"It was a pleasure meeting you, Katsura-san. Unfortunately in circumstances like this."

"Me as well," she said. "I mean, I…" she blushed. "I'm pleased to meet you as well."

"I'll see around then."

He left her.

She breathed out.

That was very strange. Before the boy appeared she had felt perfectly healthy like any other day. And then, suddenly, she had almost fallen down on the train, tripped over her own laces and fainted. That wasn't her, was it?

Oh well, maybe she just had a bad day.

Wait, could it even be called a bad day if she had met a boy like that? Most boys were overly friendly while throwing lecherous looks at her body or they kept their distance, but Itou seemed genuinely concerned about her. And without him to carry him to the nurse office things could have ended less well.

Anyway, she felt better now. And if she fainted again, the teacher could take her back to the nurse office.

Kotonoha took a deep breath and opened the door.

The class fell dead silent. They stared at her as if she had murdered someone. To be fair, they usually looked at her like that, but still. She was just a bit late, she didn't walk in covered in blood carrying an axe and a severed head or something. There was no need to look at her like that.

"You're late," the teacher finally broke the silence. "Very unbefitting for class representative."

"I'm sorry," she bowed deeply. "I uhm… I had some problems on the way here."

"Fine fine, sit down, Katsura-san. And make sure it doesn't happen again."

She quickly sat down at her desk.

The classes were arranged in two rows of three leading up. In some weird turn of events, she sat on the first row in the right part all alone. There were some empty chairs on the other rows actually, but no one sat all alone except for her.

The homeroom teacher had frowned as well when he first saw them sitting like that, but the computer had arranged them randomly based on class number, so who was he to complain? Besides, it wasn't a bad thing the diligent class rep sat on the first row.

He had checked all their numbers to see if they were cheating, but they really weren't. They all sat at their assigned place. It was a coincidence Katsura had ended up alone.

Kotonoha felt the piercing stares from her classmates. She made sure to keep her head down during class. But she couldn't escape of course. At lunch they…

"Hey, Katsura. What's wrong? Is it that time of the month again?"

Otome again.

"I have to go." She stood up, but the Trio was suddenly in front of her, blocking her path.

"Answer the question," Otome said. "You make the entire class look bad by being late."

"I'm sorry."

"Are you-"

"Katsura." A new voice said.

They all looked at the entrance.

Itou-kun? What the hell was he doing here?

There was a girl with him. A cheerful looking girl with short brown hair.

"Oh, hey Itou," Otome said. "How are you doing?"

"Alright. Can I speak to Katsura-san for a second?"

"Uhm, sure." With a frown, she walked away. The Trio followed her, as usual.

"Hey again," he said.

"Itou-kun? What are you doing here?"

"I told Sekai about this morning and she insisted I had to ask you to come to lunch with us." He gestured to the girl with him.

"Lunch?"

"It's okay if you don't want to," he said.

"No, no. I'd love to." She stood up. As if she was gonna waste an opportunity like this. Best case scenario she ate alone, worst case Otome came to pick on her. But with Itou, Otome wouldn't dare doing anything. It was no secret she had a crush on Itou.

Actually, now that she thought about it, that's why he looked so familiar. This was the boy Otome was always following with her eyes. According to the rumours, they had gone to the same middle school.

"See," Sekai said. "I told you."

"Sure, sure."

Kotonoha followed them outside.

"I'm Sekai," the girl introduced herself. "Saionji Sekai."

"Are you his girlfriend?" Kotonoha blurted out.

"Oh, no, no," she laughed. "We're just good friends."

"Oh. It's just… he called you by your given name."

"As I said, close friends."

There was something strange dancing in Sekai's blue eyes.

"I heard he heroically saved you this morning," Sekai said.

"It wasn't that heroically," Itou insisted.

"But you did help her out. Who knows what would have happened without you there?"

"She's right," Kotonoha said. "I haven't thanked you properly yet."

"There's no need, really."
"Still…"

She felt really bad about this. He really didn't have to stay with her in the nurse office. Itou had been very kind to a girl he didn't even know. At the very least she should thank him.

"You could always go on a date with him," Sekai suggested. "I'm sure he'd love that."

"Sekai!" Makoto said. "Don't say that."

"You don't like her?"

"Well, I… that's not the point, Sekai."

She chuckled.

"Hey uhm, where are we going?" Kotonoha asked. "This is not the way to the cafeteria."

"You've never been to the roof?" Sekai replied. "It's quite impressive."

"We can go up the roof?"

"The Astronomy Club can," she said.

"I didn't know we had one."

"It has two members," Itou said dryly. "I'm Vice-President."

"And I'm President," Sekai added.

"Why is she President?" Kotonoha asked.

"Because it was my idea," Sekai proclaimed.

"And paper beats rock," Itou added.

They arrived at the end of the stairs.

Sekai unlocked the door and walked up on the roof.

"Wow."

Kotonoha walked out. It was indeed pretty impressive up here.

Large iron fences had been put up for safety, but the view behind them was quite good. And there were two white benches put up here.

A sudden gust of wind lifted her skirt.

Kotonoha quickly grabbed the edges.

Strangely, Sekai was very slow to respond. Her white-blue striped panties showed for a moment before she pulled the skirt down. It almost looked like she was showing them on purpose to Itou-kun.

But that wasn't possible of course. She was just friends with Itou-kun, nothing more. Why on earth would she lie about that?

They sat down on one of the white benches.

"It's nice weather today," Itou said.

"Yeah," Sekai replied.

"Can I ask you something, Saionji-san?" Kotonoha said.

"Sure."

"Why did you invite me?"

"Well. I always see you sitting by yourself at PE. You look very lonely. Up until now, I never really had the courage to walk up to you, but I did know your name. So when Makoto mentioned you, well… shouldn't I have?"

"No no, I'm really happy you invited me."

"Okay. You're part of the Astronomy Club now."

"I am?"

"Of course, you've been up the roof. Those are the rules."

"Secretary is still available," Makoto said dryly.

"What does that entail?" she asked.

"Nothing at all. Just going up the roof whenever you want."

She smiled. "I see. That's a nice perk."

"So, Katsura-san," Sekai asked. "What are your hobbies?"

"Oh, well, uhm… you know… "

"She likes reading," Itou assisted.

"Right. Reading. Reading and uhm… shopping and uhm…"

"Seems like a very busy life," Sekai noted.

"Well what are your hobbies?" Kotonoha bounced back.

"Me? Oh, uhm, shopping and uhm… reading?"

They all laughed.

"And what about you, Itou-kun?" Kotonoha asked.

"He's even worse," Sekai said. "Last summer he spend all day lazing around on the beach."

"I had to take care of my sister," he argued.

"You have a sister?" Kotonoha asked.

"Yeah, Itaru-chan. She's eight, I think."

"You think?"

"Well it changes every year."

Sekai rolled her eyes. Clearly, this wasn't the first time he had made that joke.

"I have a younger sister too," Kotonoha said. "Kokoro-chan."

"That's a cute name," Sekai commented.

"She can be cute. But usually she's annoying."

"That's how sisters are," Itou said.

"I wish I had a little sister," Sekai said with a sigh.

"You came to play with Itaru-chan on the beach last summer."

"But that's not the same thing. I don't see her every day."

"Well…"

"Sorry." The mood instantly changed. "Forget I said that."

"Don't worry about it."

He turned to Katsura. "My parents are divorced. Itaru-chan lives with my father and I live with my mother, so we don't see each other that often."

"I see."

"Well she has to live there for the sake of that pun," Sekai said, trying to defuse the tension.

It worked quite well.

Itou chuckled. "True."

"Pun?" Kotonoha asked.

"My sister is called Itaru and my father Tomaru. But both are written with the same kanji. So the doorbell just says 'Itaru & Tomaru', spelled identically. People are very confused when they read it."

"That is pretty funny indeed."
They continued talking like that until lunch break was over.

After they said goodbye, she didn't see them again. But then again, she had stuff to do as class representative, so she was going home pretty late.

At night, she had a very strange dream, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't remember what it was about in the morning.