A/N: Hi all, I am so sorry for the long wait! It's been a hectic month what with the holidays and everything and this chapter was a huge challenge for me to write. So I really hope you guys enjoy it, and the unintentional 10k words -10k for 10 chapters am I right?

Also giving another shoutout to my girlfriend Maddy who had to deal with my insanity while writing this chapter, and I also made her write one of the scenes near the ending so props to her on that.

If you like this please let me know what you think! Comments + kudos are always much, much appreciated ❤️

Happy reading!

Beca's arms around her felt good.

Really, really good.

So good that she wanted them wrapped tighter around her. Good enough that she was starting to think of her hands, starting to become hyperaware of how they were folded neatly across her stomach. Starting to think of them sliding down her torso, at the hem of her shirt, against her skin.

Come to think of it, she was thinking of a lot of different places they could be.

Almost every part of her was pressed against Beca in some way. But somehow it wasn't enough to just have her arms around her and her back pressed up against her chest.

She wanted more.

It was a little frightening, the way her train of thought was moving at that moment, the way it was keeping her up, persisting with an unrelenting stubbornness and preventing her from getting a lick of sleep. It was more frightening that Beca was her friend, and these thoughts had come out of nowhere—well, almost nowhere. Chloe knew you weren't supposed to think about friends in this way, and she didn't want to about Beca. But then again, she had always been different. They had always been different. And she knew friends weren't supposed to make you feel hot.

But that wasn't stopping her from feeling the way she did now.

Chloe had kind of always had a crush on Beca, but in the cute, adoring way. Almost schoolgirl-like, if it weren't for her very open flirting and teasing that she was interested sexually and the fact that she definitely wouldn't turn her down were they ever to get the opportunity to 'experiment'. It still stood true to this day, except for the teensy little fact that the want she'd felt for Beca had been the kind you only feel on surface levels, in fairly innocent or simply curious quantities. Tonight, however, had seemed to blow all of that out of the water and into huge, scary proportions.

Just the thought of her hands wandering or gripping her a little harder was making the breath catch in her throat.

Everything changed in the moment she found herself straddled beneath Beca's legs, her hips sitting across hers, wrists being pressed into the mattress. She hadn't thought Beca to be capable of taking control like that, shutting her up with a single action, rendering her speechless. It was enough to make her heart beat harder and her skin grow warmer when she thought of the teasing that had come afterwards. She hadn't thought Beca to be capable of that, either—at least not when it came to innuendos, specifically innuendos involving them. Two years ago, Beca would have rolled her eyes and rolled off of her the second she caught on to any sort of nuance. What Chloe was dying to know, was why the change? And why now?

It was too simple, too easy to think about the possibility that Beca could really want her like that. Because after a certain amount of rejection, playful as she may have been, eventually Chloe had taken the hint that Beca was not interested in her as anything more than a friend. And that had never been an issue for her. After all, their friendship was far more important to her than any little crush.

Now, Chloe couldn't wrap her head around the idea that maybe something had changed. It wouldn't be that outlandish to think so, considering everything else that had changed between them in two years, but it was scary to think about. Scary, because of the way Chloe felt when she thought about the mere possibility that Beca could want her, really want her, after all these years.

Nervous, hopeful, flattered. Humbled. Beautiful…

Vulnerable.

Too good to be true.

Chloe frowned and shifted in her arms, at once feeling like the opposite of some those things and insecure and like she was jumping to conclusions. After all, it was easy, too easy to arrive there and get her hopes up, just like she had time and time again. But it was okay, because she still had Beca. Had her in ways that no one else ever could, or would.

So she hoped.

What they had was special enough that they didn't need to ruin it with sex, though Chloe wasn't entirely convinced that 'ruin' was the right word to describe it. She was still lucky enough to have Beca's arms wrapped around her when she could've been anyone else in the world, and just like that she was back to wishing that she would hold her tighter.

She stirred again, pressing herself closer into the weight against her back, their faces side by side as Chloe nuzzled herself further into the crook of her neck. Beca had stayed awake for quite a while too, having noticed by the way she kept fidgeting with her fingers and feeling the varying rhythms of her heart beating against her back. She'd noticed when she'd fallen asleep too, by the way her fingers had eventually stilled against her stomach and how her heart had fallen into a steady, even beat, her head coming to rest heavily against hers.

As if she could read her mind, Beca stiffened beside her and drew in a deep breath, stretching into a yawn. She settled and adjusted her position ever so slightly.

"You okay, Chlo?" came her voice from beside her, thick and hoarse from sleep. Both the sound and the question made Chloe's heart pound faster as she nodded.

"Yeah," she murmured, and before she could think about it, turned in her arms so that they were facing each other and hardly inches apart. "Just hold me."

Chloe tucked herself into her chest before she had a chance to respond, her head resting in the nook just below Beca's jaw. She felt her hesitate and tense against her, but only for a moment as she seemed to relax, to her relief.

"Okay," she mumbled back, already sounding half-asleep as she wrapped her arms around her. Chloe's stomach filled with butterflies and she couldn't help but smile as Beca let out a soft breath, tugging her arms securely around her waist. She nuzzled her face against her, unable to stop beaming as a shiver of excitement tingled from her head straight down to her toes.

Chloe let her eyes flutter shut as she listened to the sounding beat of Beca's heart, even and resonant just like it had been before. She could tell she was already drifting back into sleep, but as for Chloe, now she had a whole new set of things to keep her awake.

One being the fact that her sudden, unbridled desire didn't seem to be going away anytime soon. In fact, it only seemed to be getting worse. Now that she was face to face with Beca and her body was more acutely pressed against hers, her mind was running wild at a rate she found difficult to keep under wraps. She found herself very much aware of the expanse of Beca's neck before her, lying almost directly beneath her lips. It was taking every ounce of her self-control not to press them there, in one fell swoop shattering a million rules and boundaries. Beca was asleep, and she wouldn't dare. But she couldn't stop herself from thinking about if she wasn't asleep, and if she would dare. Just thinking about her possible reaction sent another thread of desire unraveling within her, spreading and pooling between her thighs as she imagined the kind of sounds she might make.

And then her heart was pounding, her palms were sweaty and she was almost grasping handfuls of Beca's t-shirt in her fists. Her thoughts and reactions were so unhinged that she almost pulled away from her, almost afraid of what might happen if she didn't put space between them.

But some touching was better than no touching at all, Chloe figured to herself, no matter how crazy it was driving her to be stuck in the middle. She closed her eyes again and sighed, trying to focus on her own breaths. What she needed to do was focus on sleep, with the hope that she would forget all of this by the morning.

By the time the sun peeked over the horizon that day, Chloe had done anything but forget.

Her 'sleep' or lack thereof had been riddled by sex dreams and fantasies, doing nothing but adding to the deep-seated ache she felt through her body which had carried over to the next day. As she came to, still wrapped in Beca's arms, she felt a restlessness that was almost painful.

Beca was right.

She was touch-starved, and it wasn't helping anything.

She could scarcely even remember the last time she'd been touched by someone other than herself. The last she could think of was Chicago, which had been over two years ago after the USO tour, and had ended up being less than stellar, anyway. It turned out that she had seriously overshot the chemistry she'd once thought they had.

The point was, it had been a very long time since she'd had a sexual encounter that wasn't self-inflicted. And she was fine with that, ninety-nine percent of the time. But Beca just so happened to be the person to unleash that something animal within her that only came out once in a while, bringing on her most intense cravings for the touch she'd been missing out on for so very long. When this happened it was almost impossible for her to think about anything else until she got some form relief. Now, thanks to Beca, she was desperate.

Desperate enough that she was up and strolling towards her bathroom before she even had a chance to think about it.

It took a matter of seconds for her to rid herself of her pajamas, now lying in a small pile at her feet as she reached up to turn the shower on.

The next thing she knew, she was beneath the water and she felt like she could breathe again as it washed over her, the temperature not making a difference because it seemed to sizzle as it hit her skin.

That was what it felt like, at least.

She let it wash over her, finally registering that the water was indeed freezing, sending a rough shiver down her spine and raising goosebumps across her skin. She rubbed at her face, smoothing her hair down and behind her shoulders. It still didn't make a difference to the way she felt.

She still wanted Beca.

Chloe bit her lip and turned away from the water, leaning her head back against the wall of the shower. She wanted to get off, needed to. But every time she closed her eyes, all she could think of was Beca.

She let out a groan, licking her lips. It was all she could take to not touch herself already. The only thing stopping her was that she didn't want to think about her while she did it, because Beca was her friend, and she didn't see her in that way, and Chloe wasn't sure she would be able to look her in the eye again afterwards.

But she was quickly getting to a point where she didn't even care.

The more she thought about it, the more she realized she wasn't just touch-starved. When she tried to think about someone else—celebrity crushes, former hookups, even exes—she realized she didn't want to think about anyone else touching her. It was Beca's touch that had set her on fire, that made her want this bad, that made her even get to this point in the first place. It was impossible to ignore that fact when just the thought of the previous night was making her weary all over again and even more desperate to be touched. Chloe was at a point where she couldn't hide the way Beca was making her feel at that moment, no matter how she might feel later. Because the more she thought about Beca touching her, the more she felt anything other than shameful about it.

Her breaths shaky, she reached up to tease an already erect nipple and let out a soft whimper, her body tensing at the contact. The simple touch seemed to unleash something even more carnal within her, and she moaned louder as she continued to circle it and reached up to tease the other, pulling on it gently. She was so sensitive and all she could think about was how Beca had done this to her, how needy she had made her, and how good it would feel if she was the one touching her.

The thought prompted another whimper and she couldn't help but slip a hand between her thighs, pushing her breasts together so she could touch both of them as she rubbed a finger against her clit. She moaned at how soaking wet she was and gasped as she pressed two fingers inside her, grinding her hips into a rhythm. Her knees were already shaking and it was too easy to pretend it was Beca, standing against her with Chloe's leg around her hip, her mouth making a mark on her neck while her fingers played with her nipple. Chloe cried out louder, her skin feeling flushed despite the cold water as she worked her fingers faster, feeling herself getting tighter, her breaths becoming shorter.

She panted and started to whimper at a higher volume, leaning her head back against the tile as she squeezed her eyes shut. She didn't care if Beca heard her. She almost wanted her to hear her, to hear how desperate she had made her. She wanted her to know that it was her fault she was making those sounds, that she'd had to get up and go take a shower just to relieve herself.

She almost wanted to moan her name, just so that there was no question in her mind that it was her she was thinking about.

Beca awoke to the sound of water running in the background. It felt calming, almost peaceful as she came to. Her head face down into a pillow, the second thing she noticed as she peeked her eyes open was the absence of Chloe. Her memory of the night before was still foggy, but she remembered how she had lay awake for a long time before falling asleep holding Chloe in her arms. Even more foggy was her memory of waking up in the middle of the night for them to switch cuddling positions.

It wasn't that weird to think about now, but maybe it would have been weirder had she woken up with Chloe still in her arms. She'd put two and two together that the running water was her in the shower, but still wondered why she had gotten up so early. Then she remembered that they were hiking the Columbia River Gorge that day and almost let out an audible groan. Ugh, she thought instead, slamming her face back into the pillow in an effort to squeeze in a few more minutes of sleep.

Minutes passed and Beca wasn't succeeding in getting anywhere closer to sleep. She had only started to drift a bit when she thought she heard a sound—not a very loud one but it seemed to be amplified by the echo of the shower. She passed it off as nothing, after all she had known Chloe long enough to know that she let out a lot of random squeals and outbursts, including for things like dropping a shampoo bottle or something of the sort.

But then she heard it again, this time more distinct, and she had to wonder if Chloe had maybe dropped said bottle on her toe or something.

Then she heard it a third time, and this time her eyes flew wide open as her head shot up from the pillow. This time it was loud enough that she heard it, unmistakably—a high-pitched moan.

Beca gulped, her mouth suddenly dry as she sat up, pin-straight. It had been clear as day, even echoed by the shower, but she still couldn't believe what she was hearing. And before she had a chance to question herself again, she heard it once more, louder still.

This one had a bit of a different effect on her, her mouth clamping shut as she grasped for the covers. It had been longer and more drawn out, ending in a low hum, and it had definitely been Chloe's voice. As if there had been any doubt in her mind, she would recognize it anywhere, even when distorted by sounds she had never heard escape from her mouth.

At least not until now.

Chloe moaned again, this time accompanied by a gasp and a desperate groan. At this point Beca's knuckles were turning white with how hard she was clutching the comforter in her fists, her jaw gritted. She still couldn't believe what she was hearing, even though by then it was more than obvious what was happening. She could barely even think the words without her turning completely red.

Chloe was touching herself.

In the shower.

And she could hear everything.

Beca only turned even more pink when she heard her again, sounding more breathless but seeming to do little to control her volume. She continued to moan and started panting, and with how loud she was getting, it didn't sound like she was trying to keep quiet at all.

Before she could even try to wonder about why this was happening, Beca's mind instantly flashed back to the night before. She had heard that moan once before, though much quieter and isolated on its own. The other difference was that Chloe had been teasing her that time. With the way she sounded now, this time was no joke.

Then she remembered Chloe lying beneath her and how she'd joked about persuading her into having sex with her and how Beca had teased her about being touch-starved. She remembered the way Chloe had looked at her, how her eyes got big and her cheeks flushed as if something had come over her, and all at once Beca found herself wondering if Chloe getting herself off had anything to do with that.

The thought made her mouth dry up all over again and suddenly it was hard to breathe. Beca was still gripping at the blankets as if her life depended on it and she felt a strange sensation come over her, one so strong that it was hard to ignore. That she couldn't really ignore, even if she wanted to.

She flopped back against the pillows with a small groan, rubbing her hands against her face. Chloe didn't seem to be stopping anytime soon and the sound of her filled her ears, making her feel lightheaded and almost dizzy with the way her head was spinning. Her moans were only coming faster and more breathless, sounding more and more needy each time.

It was hard to believe that she was just there on the other side of the door, doing this to herself, not even a room away. The thought made Beca feel like she could melt completely into the bed. Even more jarring was the fact that she could easily get up and go see for herself—walk into the bathroom and pull that curtain back…

She gulped again, her eyes widening at the thought as she brought her hands to her forehead. She didn't know what had gotten into her, but part of her was curious. Part of her wanted to go in there and ask Chloe if she needed some help. But she didn't have the mental capacity to unpack that at the moment, and all she could think about was how the thought of Chloe touching herself was making her weak in the knees and how she wouldn't be able to get up if she tried.

The sounds she was making were reaching a new level of desperation, and Beca could hardly breathe. She sounded like she was close to the edge and she couldn't help but picture her, with her skin all flushed and damp against the wall of the shower, biting her lip down as she panted. She couldn't deny that it was hot, the way she sounded, the way she pictured her, the idea of her losing complete control. Chloe was always so confident—Beca had never witnessed a side of her this vulnerable, despite the fact that she'd seen her cry many times. There was something different about this; something more raw, more exposed. Not just vulnerability, but giving up control of your body and mind. That was on another playing field entirely.

Beca couldn't help but wonder what it would be like if Chloe were to give her that control. What it would be like if she was the one inside of her. She wondered if she would be just as gone and desperate as she sounded now.

Beca didn't want to think about where this had come from or why, but it was easy, way too easy to picture her and Chloe in that shower instead. To picture Chloe pressed up against that wall with Beca's chest flush to hers, a hand between her legs. She would watch her, kiss her as she started to come undone, could almost feel her nails digging into her back. Could practically hear Chloe whimpering for her, telling her she was about to come.

Blinking back to reality, she could hear Chloe whimpering, just not the part involving her. Beca felt hot all over, her skin feeling like it was burning and she was almost one hundred percent sure that there was a mess in her pants.

Then Chloe got louder, her sounds almost shrill and Beca bit her lip down hard. She could tell she was close and Beca found herself just wishing she could see her, see the moment she unravelled and completely lost herself, wanting to feel her come.

And then she came and Beca felt like her head might explode just listening to it, the sounds painting images of fireworks in her brain as she just lay there, mouth lying agape as Chloe gasped to catch her breath.

She lay there for a moment, even as the room turned silent. Unable to move, she realized something.

She was the most turned on she had been in a long, long time.

But it was nothing, right? How could she help it? It wasn't as if she'd had a choice in listening to it. It was as if someone were to place porn right in front of you. You wouldn't be able to help feeling some type of way, even if it was slightly weird and unexpected…Right?

She continued to lie there with her jaw slack, her mouth feeling drier than the Sahara as she contemplated the chain of events that had unfolded within the last twenty-four hours. The more she tried to make sense of things or wrap her head around them, the less she understood. And it was barely 8 a.m.

But she didn't have time to contemplate things anyway, once she realized that the shower had been off for several minutes now and that Chloe would have to emerge from the bathroom at some point. She heard rustling from behind the door and started to panic, at once wondering if she should pretend to be asleep or that she hadn't heard a thing. Neither seemed possible, she thought to herself as she fumbled for her phone and tried to arrange herself into what she thought might look like a casual position.

She was just in time as Chloe walked out of the bathroom just seconds later, and Beca had to try her damnedest not to let her eyes jump to her right away. Instead she laid back, with one arm propping her head up against her elbow and pretended to scroll on her phone, though it was taking every ounce of her concentration not to look up at Chloe.

"Oh hey, Becs."

"Hey," Beca looked up, offering a smile and trying to seem normal. The only problem was, acting 'normal' didn't come so easily when you had to think about it.

"You're up early," Chloe commented, hardly glancing at her as she started rummaging through one of her dresser drawers. It didn't go unnoticed by Beca, who also took in that she was wearing that tiny white towel again and had to try not to stare, again.

"I heard the water running," she explained, trying not to have a dumb look on her face, but of course she had no way of knowing. "How was your shower?"

She watched Chloe hesitate in the middle of what she was doing and fumble with the shirt she was holding, almost dropping it. She watched as her face turned beet red and she couldn't quite meet Beca's eyes, turning back to her dresser.

"It was fine," she replied as she re-folded the shirt in her hands, and Beca could almost hear the wavering in her voice. "Why?"

Beca shrugged.

"Just wondering."

Chloe said nothing as she opened another drawer and appeared to start looking for a pair of pants. Beca really couldn't stop staring at her now, noticing how she was quiet, subdued, not meeting her eyes, and just generally acting not very much like Chloe. The answer was pretty obvious as to why she might have been a little embarrassed or even shy, but this was Chloe. None of those words were even in her vocabulary. Chloe Beale was not shy in any sense of the word, and the few times Beca had seen her embarrassed were mostly a cappella-related, namely with their share of disasters such as Muffgate and the convention performance as a few examples. But even in those scenarios, she had never been the type to deal with her shame in silence, and Beca knew better than anyone that when it came to things like this, things involving sex, she had never been shy. So why now?

"Why won't you look me in the eye?"

Beca blurted out the question but didn't regret asking it—after all, she wanted to know. Chloe hesitated again and slowly looked up at her, at last meeting her eyes, though Beca could tell it pained her a bit to do so.

"Who said I can't look you in the eye?"

"You weren't before."

"Well I am now."

"Then why are you blushing?"

Beca had noticed the pink hue of her cheeks, which only grew darker after she pointed it out. Chloe rolled her eyes and averted her gaze, taking a pair of yoga pants and adding them to the small pile on top of her dresser.

"I'm not. I just got out of the shower."

"Then why are you being all shy?" Beca picked at her with a grin, kind of enjoying doing the teasing for once. "Are you keeping a secret from me? Secrets don't make friends, Chlo."

"Maybe it's because I'm just standing here trying to pick out my clothes while you get to ogle me in a towel," Chloe said with a pointed look, arching a brow in Beca's direction.

Beca just smirked, finally seeing some of that familiar fire back in her eyes.

"Chloe, since when have you ever been shy, especially about being naked?"

Beca watched as Chloe blushed again, feeling a newfound sense of satisfaction at the sight.

"Well unless you want to see me naked again, you better close your eyes, 'cause I'm about to get dressed."

Beca couldn't help but smirk as she laid back down and covered her eyes with her hands.

"And no peeking."

"Yes, ma'am."

She heard Chloe chuckle a little before the whoosh of her towel hitting the floor, and it was in that moment that Beca fully took in the fact that she had really been completely naked beneath it.

She tried not to gulp too audibly as she heard the glide of fabric across skin, connecting with a snap, then what sounded like her pulling something over her head and shimmying it down, secured into place with another snap.

"Okay, all my parts are covered."

By the time Beca opened her eyes Chloe was pulling on a pair of yoga pants, and her eyes nearly bugged out of her head at the sight of her in just her sports bra. Chloe tugged them up her hips and let the elastic snap into place at her waist before shooting her a winning smile. She must have caught the look on Beca's face because she glanced down to look at her own chest, then back at her.

"I know, it's not my sexiest number, but we are going hiking. Right, Becs?"

Beca was speechless for a moment as she cleared her throat and licked her lips, forcing her gaze away from her breasts to meet Chloe's eyes.

"Right, yeah," she said with a pinched smile.

By the time she began to contemplate Chloe's statement, the fact that it was probably the sexiest sports bra she had ever seen, with an especially low cut to show the most cleavage and realized that she had done all of this on purpose, it was too late.

She was already blushing.

As if she had watched it all come together in her brain, Chloe shot her a huge, elated grin before pulling her t-shirt over her head, leaving Beca feeling like a sitting duck.

Just like that, Chloe had gained back the upper hand again.

By the time they were in the car and speeding down the interstate, things had seemed to return to normal—well, as normal as they could be after that morning. After her little exchange with Beca, Chloe was back to her more confident self, even if now whenever she looked at her she felt a bit of a warm feeling come over her. It was part of why she'd suggested that Beca drive. After all, she wouldn't be able to sneak as many looks at her if she were the one driving.

She couldn't stop herself from sneaking glances between checking the maps, sometimes longer than intended. But she couldn't help it. She always liked to look at Beca, but now it was like she was fascinated by all sorts of little details about her all over again. Like the curve of her jaw and how it was set whenever she was concentrating on something, how she chewed her lip while she was deep in thought. The way her throat moved whenever she swallowed or cleared her throat; the way her eyes smiled before her mouth caught up to her. Then all the little flecks of grey and dark blue in her irises, and how they could see right through you if you looked hard enough. How she sat, calm and collected as she gazed out at the road, hands gripping the steering wheel with a poised confidence.

She didn't know why she couldn't tear her gaze away, but all of the sudden Beca was compelling to her in ways she hadn't been before. She was sure it had something to do with the way she had pictured them earlier…But she hadn't expected the feeling to last.

She couldn't help but notice that there was something different about her that she couldn't quite put her finger on; something to do with the way she held herself. Back in their Barden days Beca had always put up a front, acting tough on the outside to protect herself from the insecurities she felt on the inside. She still had that same stubborn attitude, but there was an ease and confidence about her that was new, and real. Chloe could tell that whatever she'd gone through in LA had strengthened her—she wasn't faking it anymore.

Something about it was making her linger. She had always been attracted to Beca, but this felt different than the way she had adored and doted after her for all those years. She was successful, she was confident, she'd made a decent living off of her career. She'd stopped pushing her away when it came to the emotional stuff; stopped running from tears, from pain. She had become someone Chloe could rely on, someone she could go to if she needed a friend and she didn't have to worry about scaring her off anymore. She knew what she was doing, knew who she was now and it showed, serving as yet another reminder that they definitely weren't in college anymore.

And Chloe happened to find that really, really attractive.

There couldn't have been a more perfect break from her thoughts than hiking.

They spent the good part of the day exploring trails along the gorge, finding waterfalls and checking out lookout points before heading back to the car to drive to the next one. Beca didn't complain as much as Chloe had expected her to, once she realized that the majority of the trails really weren't very strenuous at all. They would take breaks between each hike, finding places to sit and take in the scenery before making the trek back. What made Chloe even happier was that Beca seemed to actually be enjoying herself, loving the way she stared out at the river from the steep grassy hill they were sitting atop of.

"It really is beautiful out here," she said, sitting with her legs crossed and her arms resting atop her knees.

"See? Now you're getting it," Chloe grinned as she scooted up behind her, resting her chin atop her shoulder. She thought back to when they had set off on their first trail and Beca had whined to her asking why they couldn't listen to music. Chloe responded by saying it would defeat the purpose of being in nature, which was met by another grunt from the DJ. She was glad to see she had warmed up to it since then.

"It's just so calm and peaceful out here," she went on, still gazing out across the great expanse of land and river beyond them. "I kind of wish I could do something like this after a shitty day at work. You know to like, decompress. Find my zen, wherever it is."

"Well there are a ton of places to hike in California," Chloe pointed out, "But there's nothing quite like the Gorge."

Beca turned to look at her and smiled, making her heart skip a beat at the sight.

"I'm really glad you brought me out here."

Chloe smiled, eyes raking over her with a happy twinkle in them, her stomach fluttering at how close their faces were and how she could see every little detail of Beca's expression.

"I'm really glad you came with me, Becs. You don't know how much it means to me that you're here, that you went out of your way just to see me."

Beca looked over her face and tucked a strand of hair behind Chloe's ear, giving her a small smile.

"There's nowhere else I'd rather be."

Chloe beamed, so wide that she could feel her eyes crinkling at their corners. She was overcome with so much love that she didn't have to think before nuzzling her nose against Beca's cheek and leaving a kiss there. It felt so easy, so natural, so right that she wasn't even worried about overstepping or freaking Beca out.

She found herself taken by surprise when she felt Beca move to wrap her arms around her, tucking her head against her chest and hugging her close. Feeling her heartbeat as they gazed out at the breathtaking view before them, Chloe had to agree.

There was no place she'd rather be, either.

The sun was just starting to fade beyond the horizon by the time they headed back to Portland. They'd stopped for dinner in the nearby waterside town of Hood River and gone through all the pictures Beca had taken on her camera that day. Chloe gushed over how pretty her scenery shots had turned out, and of course they'd taken a bunch of selfies, some cute, some not so cute, and some with Chloe kissing her on the cheek while Beca made a face. Then they'd come across all the candids Beca had taken of Chloe and she'd been even more ecstatic, fawning over how many she'd taken.

In all honesty, Beca hadn't been able to forget much about the events of that morning. They'd stuck in her mind and lingered there for the rest of the day, popping up at the most inconvenient times and leaving her to wonder about what was going on in Chloe's head. The mere possibility that she'd had anything to do with her shower or the way she acted afterwards kept swimming around in circles in her head, over and over, and not even nature could save her.

So it wasn't exactly her fault that Chloe had been on her mind all day, not to mention right in front of her. How could she not take a few pictures, when her own natural beauty had blended so well with the beauty around them? She loved the way Chloe always seemed to absorb her surroundings, feeling and understanding everything so deeply as if they were apart of her. She'd seemed so peaceful, so at ease. She'd wanted to capture some of those moments—the quiet, beautiful moments of Chloe just being herself.

Shortly after they got in the door of Chloe's bedroom that evening, she took Beca's hands in hers, her eyes growing big with a look she knew all too well.

"Becs," she cooed, fluttering her eyelashes at her, "I wanted to ask you…"

"What is it, Chlo?" she cut to the chase, arching a brow at her.

"Well," Chloe hummed, smiling now as she swung her hands in hers, "There's this event going on downtown tonight. It's a movie in the park…"

"Oh god," Beca groaned, rolling her eyes. "What movie is it?"

"I don't know yet," Chloe said, eyes still wide as she pressed her lips together expectantly. "They don't announce it. People don't really go for the movie, it's more about the experience. I go every year."

"So…" Beca trailed off, piecing it together, "We just spent all day out in the cold, and now you want to spend two more hours outside watching a movie?"

Chloe giggled.

"Don't worry, Becs. They have fire pits, and we'll bring blankets," she stepped closer, trailing her fingers up her arm. "I'll keep you nice and warm."

She winked and Beca immediately felt heat rush to her cheeks, suddenly feeling warm all over. She swallowed, trying to think of something intelligent to say, but her mind had gone blank.

"Uh, w-well—"

"It's okay if you don't want to. We've already done a lot today, so I'm sure you're tired. I just thought I'd ask."

Beca looked over her features and knew that she was being genuine. She wasn't pouting or begging, just giving her the option, and something about that made her appreciate Chloe and her thoughtfulness that much more.

"No, it's okay," she said after a moment, offering a small smile. "We can go."

"Really?" Chloe's gasped, her expression brightening in a way that told her she really hadn't been expecting her to say yes. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," Beca grinned, her gaze softening at the look of pure joy on Chloe's face. "Now go get ready before I change my mind."

She rolled her eyes as she tackled her with a squeal and a thank you, but couldn't help but smile at how her enthusiasm was always so bright. She didn't know what kind of person she was starting to become, but she couldn't think of a better way to end their day than spending it under the stars watching a movie with her best friend.

They arrived at the park about an hour later, where a giant screen and projector were set up and a series of fire pits varying in size scattered throughout the grass. They set up their blankets and Chloe laid out her smorgasbord of snacks, including a mix of popcorn, pretzels and M&Ms, a variety of gummies, hot chocolate in a thermos, and even stuff to make s'mores.

"Jeez Chlo, are you going to set up a snack booth?" Beca teased.

"Shut up," Chloe grinned, elbowing her in her side as she settled into one of the reclining stadium seats they had brought to keep themselves propped up. "Hey look, it's starting."

The opening credits rolled, the first scene depicting the arrivals gate at an airport accompanied by the voice of a narrator.

"Oh, god. This is going to be sappy, isn't it," Beca said, making a face.

"Shh," Chloe hushed her, putting a hand on her arm. Beca could see the massive grin on her face by the light of the fire and was pretty sure she already knew the answer to her question. Eventually the title Love Actually faded onto the screen and Beca let out a groan at the same time Chloe squealed in delight.

"Really? The most cliche Christmas movie of all time—"

"It's a crowd pleaser, Becs," Chloe looked up at her, saying so matter-of-factly. "And it just so happens to be one of my favourite movies."

"Of course it is," Beca said, sighing quietly. She was pretty sure she had already known this about Chloe, but had always somehow avoided watching it with her by one way or another. Though in all honesty, the only thing she was dreading about it now was the length. She would do anything to make Chloe smile, even if that meant making the trek downtown to watch a two and a half hour sappy rom com in the park.

She didn't even mind it when Chloe started cuddling up against her, close enough that Beca decided to wrap her arm around her shoulders. Chloe slid her arm across her stomach and curled into her, her head coming to rest in the crook of her neck. A few years ago, maybe even a few months ago, she would have found this newfound closeness with Chloe to be weird. But it didn't feel weird to her. Not at all.

Sitting there holding Chloe as the movie played on, Beca's mind started to wander off into thought. With everything that had been happening, it was the first time all day that she'd been able to really stop and think. She hadn't really known what to expect from visiting Chloe, but in all honesty she hadn't imagined she'd have as much fun as she was having, especially with so many new experiences. Beca normally wasn't one for trying new things—she liked having a plan and not straying too far out of her comfort zone. But for some reason with Chloe, she was comfortable with a little spontaneity. Where Beca liked structure and plans, Chloe was more free-spirited and liked to 'go with the flow'. When they were together, they met somewhere in the middle. She liked Chloe's flexibility and curiosity, how they explored together and ended up trying new things.

She couldn't help but think about how with anyone else, this wouldn't be the case. She remembered the few times she'd gone on road trips with Jesse and how she'd often been irritable and cranky whenever plans went awry or whenever they ended up being out for longer than she wanted to be. With Chloe, not everything always went according to plan but they still managed to have fun. Come to think of it, they had done quite a few things during her visit that she normally wouldn't have. For example, going hiking. She was pretty sure she wouldn't have had fun doing that with anyone else, either. And she definitely would not have been up to going to watch a two hour chick flick out in a park of all places, especially after hiking, if it hadn't been for Chloe.

The more she thought about it, the more she found herself thinking back to Jesse. More specifically, how she wouldn't have done a lot of those things, even for him. How it was like pulling teeth sometimes whenever he wanted to watch a movie with her but with Chloe, she seldom said no. And how she never would have been able to tolerate spending so much time with him—they would have fun together, but after a day together or spending the night she was always grateful for her alone time. But with Chloe they had spent basically every waking moment together since she'd arrived, even sleeping in the same bed, and Beca had hardly thought twice about it.

The more she thought about it, the more she was realizing. Jesse had been her longest relationship, her most steady boyfriend out of the few she'd had. Yet somehow she enjoyed spending time with her best friend so much more. And as much as Beca wanted to rationalize that, to say it wasn't that weird or abnormal for someone to enjoy their friends more, with everything else that had happened over the past few days, she knew it was more than that. While it was true that she'd never had many 'friends who were girls' throughout her life, none of them had been like Chloe. More specifically, she had never had a relationship with any of the other Bellas like the one she had with Chloe. None of them even came close.

They were different. They always had been.

From the moment she barged in on her shower, to the day she had gotten on a plane to Los Angeles, to now when they were watching a movie together underneath the stars, Chloe Beale had rocked her world—even when she hadn't liked it sometimes. She had never been the same; never would be the same. Beca couldn't imagine her life without her. She didn't want to.

That was why it was so damn hard to accept the way she really felt, the way she had shoved down to the deepest depths of her cold tiny heart so it had little chance of coming back up for air. The way she had felt when she'd seen Chloe kiss Chicago. How her blood had run cold and how her stomach twisted into a thousand tiny knots and she just felt sick in every possible way.

She didn't want to feel that way again. So it was easier to just…move on. Move away. Forget that anything had ever happened and any way she had ever felt and whatever she had sort of kind of maybe been planning to tell Chloe that night which had all gone out the window. It was easier to ignore how those feelings were starting up all over again.

It had been easier, until now.

Until now when every moment between them was unfolding into something more and how the truth was staring her back in the face every chance it got. Until now when she actually couldn't deny it anymore—couldn't deny the way Chloe looked at her, smiled at her, the way her face sometimes just lit up when she was around, how she'd get that sparkle in her eye that Beca loved so much. Couldn't deny that she loved making her happy, loved being the reason for the smile on her face. That she wanted to be close to her when she pushed everyone else away. That she used to push Chloe away too, until she'd really lost her and couldn't bear to let it happen again.

It was a lot to take in, she thought as she looked back at Chloe, who was still fully engrossed in the movie, blissfully unaware of all the worries flying about Beca's head. She didn't know what to do, what she could do, but all she knew was that things couldn't stay the same between them forever. She didn't know how, when or what, but she knew she had to do something. Something had to give.

By the time the movie was almost over Beca found herself engrossed too, to her surprise, and had even become invested in some of the storylines. Her cold heart had especially sympathized with the character who was in love with his best friend's wife, almost tearing up at the scene where he'd confessed his feelings to her through giant flashcards.

"Awe, she learned English for him," Beca whined during another heartwarming scene, mindlessly tossing bits of popcorn and M&Ms into her mouth as her eyes stayed glued to the screen. She heard Chloe giggle beside her and felt her squeeze her arm, nuzzling her head even further up her shoulder.

Within a few minutes it was over, and Beca had half been expecting lights to come up as if they were in a theatre. Instead people around them just started gathering their belongings and slowly making their way out of the park.

She sat up after a moment and Chloe gave her some room, having still been attached to her shoulder and they both stretched their arms.

"So?" Chloe asked, looking at her with hopeful eyes. "Did you like it?"

Beca couldn't help but smile as she looked at her, unable stop herself from thinking about how cute and cozy she looked wrapped in her blanket in the light of the fire.

"It wasn't horrible," she said, reluctant as she started to gather up their snacks. "It was like, okay, I guess."

Chloe let out a squeal and Beca rolled her eyes, turning to arch a brow in her direction.

"You so liked it."

"Yeah, whatever."

Chloe laughed again as she started helping put away their stuff. Beca rolled her eyes once more, still smiling all the while. In all honesty, the movie hadn't been half bad. But Beca would have felt more or less indifferent whether she liked it or not. The reason she'd enjoyed it as much as she did was because she was there with Chloe. It was getting to look over and see her smiling, laughing and cuddled up against her that made it all worthwhile for her.

It was yet another thing she realized as she finished packing up the rest of their items into a bag. She wasn't enjoying trying these new things because she necessarily liked doing them. She was having fun because she was doing them with Chloe.

She thought back to what she had said earlier that day, about there being no place she'd rather be. Sure, the hiking had been fun and the scenery was beautiful, but it wasn't about that. It was about how Chloe always had a way of making her feel safe and calm and comfortable and like she understood. Like she didn't have to worry. It didn't seem to matter where they were. Chloe felt like home.

By the time that thought solidified in her head she had gone completely still and found herself staring at Chloe, not having registered it. She watched, dazed, as she folded one of their blankets and placed it beside her, glancing up and noticing Beca's eyes on her.

"Hello, Earth to Becs," she teased, a smile playing up on her lips, "What's that look for?"

"Uh, n-nothing," Beca stammered, finally snapping out of it. "I just wanted to see if you were ready to go."

There seemed to be a newfound marked tension between them as they walked through the now deserted park. Taking their time with their intertwined hands swinging between them, this somehow felt different from anything Beca had felt between them before, different even from the kind of tension she had felt that morning. She'd hardly thought twice when Chloe first reached for her hand, even though it had made her cheeks flush a deep crimson for a moment, earning a smile from the redhead. It was starting to feel a little more familiar—Chloe's palm against hers, their fingers laced through each other's, her thumb brushing against her skin, even though she felt about as nervous as if she was back in middle school again and this was her very first date.

That wasn't what this was, but it sure had a way of feeling like it.

"I really had fun tonight, Bec."

"You did?" Beca looked up, feeling hopeful.

"Yeah," Chloe smiled back at her, making her heart do funny things. "It really means a lot that you were willing to do this with me. I know I've been making you do all sorts of things you don't like lately."

"You aren't making me," Beca said, returning her smile. "I don't mind. As long as it makes you happy."

Chloe beamed and Beca's heart skipped a beat at the sight as she stepped closer to her, their shoulders brushing now as they walked.

"You've changed, you know," Chloe said, looking at her, thoughtful. "You're different."

"Different?" Beca asked, hardly able to contain her surprise. "How?"

"I don't know," she shrugged. "You just are."

"You can't just tell me I've changed and then not give me more than that," Beca said, arching a brow at her. Chloe just giggled and looked on, still swinging their hands between them.

"Well for one thing, Beca Mitchell of two years ago wouldn't have ever unironically said, 'as long as it makes you happy.'"

Beca threw her head back and laughed, making Chloe laugh along with her.

"Yeah, I guess that's pretty fucking sappy, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Chloe said with a chuckle, bumping her with her shoulder. "It's cute, though."

Beca scoffed.

"First sweet, now cute? Chloe, I think we need to talk."

Chloe giggled again and it was hard for Beca to not want to smile at the sound.

"Well you have been sweet, cute and sappy lately…"

"Yeah," Beca said, wrinkling her nose with the realization. "What's up with that, anyway?"

"I don't know, you tell me," Chloe chuckled, linking her arm through hers.

Beca resisted the urge to gulp—as if she didn't know the answer to her own question. She looked up and glanced around, suddenly realizing she didn't recognize the area of the park they were in from the way they came.

"Uh, Chloe? Where are we going?"

"Just come with me," Chloe said as she picked up her pace, tugging her arm. Beca resisted the urge to ask questions, already having trouble keeping up with the redhead's limitless energy. It wasn't until they were at the base of a hill that Chloe let go of her arm.

The hill was well over three times Beca's height, and just the sight of it made her legs ache. After a long day of hiking, the thought of climbing it was enough to make her feel like they might buckle and snap beneath her. Maybe Chloe had been right about her being 'twiggy' after all…

"We aren't going to climb this, are we?" Beca almost groaned.

"We sure are," Chloe chirped, already beginning her ascent up the mound.

Beca rolled her eyes, rubbing the bridge of her nose between two fingers. She was exhausted. She was practically shaking just from standing. It had to be close to midnight and she could feel sleep starting to tug at her eyelids. But as much as she just wanted to collapse there and whine to go home, she began following Chloe up the hill without hardly thinking twice.

The things I do for this girl, Beca thought to herself.

Chloe reached the top with Beca not far behind. The redhead took a deep breath of the night air and plopped down on the grass that was starting to become wet with dew. She looked up at Beca and patted the space next to her, a huge smile on her face. Beca rolled her eyes, stifling her own smile as she came to sit beside her. Before she could even make herself comfortable, Chloe was leaning her head on her shoulder.

The sudden contact made Beca jump slightly, her heart skipping a beat in her chest. She tried to calm despite the sudden rush of adrenaline and allowed herself to be present in the moment, leaning over to slide her arm around Chloe's waist. She didn't know why she had jumped as if it had been unexpected. As if having their arms around each other wasn't quickly becoming their new normal.

"I've been coming to this park since I was a kid, and this was always my favourite spot," Chloe said. "I love how you can see the whole park from up here. I used to pretend I was on Mount Olympus with the Greek gods."

Beca snorted. "Mount Olympus?"

"Hey, don't laugh," Chloe grinned, shoving Beca with her shoulder. "What can I say? I've always been very theatrical."

"I can see you haven't changed much," Beca quipped as Chloe settled her head back on her shoulder.

"You know you love it," Chloe replied, and Beca could feel her eyes looking up at her. She let out a hum in response, sighing at how true that statement was.

After a few moments of looking up at the stars, Beca began to get lost in her own thoughts. She knew she had to tell Chloe how she felt. Even if nothing came from it, she didn't want to keep something like this to herself. But most of all, she knew it wasn't right to keep it from Chloe. She knew they were close enough that eventually Chloe would start to know something was up, if she didn't already, and Beca wanted to be the one to tell her what exactly that 'something' was before Chloe started asking questions.

Just not now, though. Not when there was still so much time left of her trip. She didn't want to risk ruining the rest of it—the rest of what little time she had with Chloe.

The sound of Chloe's whisper pulled Beca away from her thoughts.

"Becs?"

"Hmm?"

"There's no one else I would rather be here with than with you."

Beca felt her stomach fill with so many butterflies, she could have sworn she would fly away. They swelled up and into her chest and as she looked at Chloe, she found herself mesmerized by how beautiful she looked in the moonlight.

"Me either, Chlo."

A beat of silence fell between them and Chloe gazed back at her, a smile on her lips as she tucked a strand of Beca's hair behind her ear. She felt a tightness growing in her chest and realized she probably wouldn't be able to speak, even if she wanted to. Chloe had her captivated.

"Hey, Becs?"

"Mhm," Beca hummed, still off in dream land.

"What's that over there?"

Chloe pointed in the direction opposite them and as Beca turned around to look, the next thing she knew she was being pushed over the edge of the hill.

"Shit," she muttered as she picked up speed, rolling rapidly down the side of it. She heard Chloe's giggle in the distance and squeezed her eyes shut as she tumbled down.

After what felt like an eternity she hit the grass at the bottom, landing on her back with a decent amount of force. Chloe landed beside her a few seconds later, her shoulder bumping hers as she laughed like it was the most fun she'd ever had. Beca tried to move but couldn't, her limbs feeling like they weighed a thousand pounds as she laid sprawled out like a starfish, waiting for the world to stop spinning around her.

"Chloe," she breathed, "What the hell?"

Chloe just giggled beside her, still catching her breath as she moved closer to her, sliding an arm across her waist.

"That was fun, right?"

"Loads," Beca mumbled, sitting up slowly and putting a hand to her head. Chloe followed suit, propping her arm up behind her. She looked at Beca and her smile widened as she let out another giggle.

"You got a little…" she looked up at her hair and Beca felt her pick out a dried up leaf, cracking them both up.

"Thanks," Beca smirked, her gaze coming to rest on Chloe. Even in the dark of night her eyes shone bright blue. Even with her now messy red hair riddled with grass and leaves, she was still the most beautiful person she had ever seen.

Chloe tucked another strand of hair behind Beca's ear and all of the sudden she was back in dream land. She hardly breathed, staring wordlessly as she continued to play with her hair, brushing it back from her forehead. Chloe looked like an angel in the moonlight and Beca couldn't stop herself from staring, eyes wandering across her features.

It was in that moment that she realized Chloe was staring at her, too.

Beca swallowed, her gaze softening. The next thing she knew Chloe was leaning in, and it was hard to breathe again as her lips brushed hers, so gentle that it felt like a whisper. It felt as if all the air in her body had escaped her but before she could assess what she was doing, she had a hand on the back of Chloe's head and was guiding her back to her, easing her into another kiss.

This time it felt like she really couldn't breathe. This time her lips were fully pressed against hers without doubt or hesitation, her stomach swimming with butterflies, and it felt intentional. Was intentional. Every part of her had wanted to kiss Chloe in that moment. She was just having trouble convincing her brain that it was actually happening.

Her fingers tightened in her hair and she moved her hand to her cheek, brushing her thumb against her skin as she kissed her once more, softer this time. Her lips just brushed hers, but it was enough to count.

They separated slowly and Beca was still finding it hard to breathe, especially when faced with the fact that she would have to look Chloe in the eye and realize what she had done. She kept her hand on her cheek as she pulled away and found Chloe looking up at her with wide eyes. Lips slightly ajar, her cheeks had turned the softest shade of pink.

Beca licked her lips and swallowed, tearing her gaze away. That had really happened. She had really just kissed Chloe, and the time wasn't right but that didn't matter now. It was done, and she had to accept that.

"Um," she breathed, running a hand through her hair, "I guess we should go get our stuff."

But that didn't mean she was ready to talk about it.