Oct: 1997:

Harry sat down in front of Dumbledore's desk. The man was going to be annoying he just knew it. He bit his tongue and repeated his mantra of 8 more months to graduation if he lived that long. "Tea? Lemon Drop?" Dumbledore smiled.

"No, thank you." Harry hadn't touched one of those potion laced drops since his first year. He wondered what twisted scheme the man had come up with now. He briefly wondered if the lemon drops soured the man's brains, he did hide the smirk he felt forming at a lemon shaped brain.

"Harry, as you know Voldemort has his yearly events."

Why are his eyes blue? Harry knew the man was full of it. "Yes, every Halloween and the end of year event every May." Harry was hoping the man wasn't going to rehash everything they knew. He would take out his wand and hex the man if he did.

"Correct, my sources have told me that Voldemort is going to bind you to him in marriage on Halloween. He knows if he does, he can use your magic and you won't be able to fight against him, nor he against you, but to him, it will get you out of the way. He doesn't want to have to worry about you or the prophecy any longer."

He wondered what sources. If it was Snape, the man would be sitting next to him, trying not to look annoyed at the Headmaster. "I see, and how are we going to stop this?" Harry knew he shouldn't have asked the question, but he also knew the answer was going to come out one way or another and he didn't want to spend the next hour playing trying to drag the answer out of Dumbledore. The man must love the sound of his own voice, and hearing himself dish out all his idiotic ideas.

"I am not sure if you are aware of how a binding works, but when two people are bound, it's for life. Which means when I perform the ceremony and with a magical marriage bond I would be using it would assure that love would come later in the marriage. As you know love is a very powerful tool."

Did he actually hear that correctly? Was he even being asked if he wanted to get married? Who in their right minds acted like this? "So you're going to bind me and Voldemort?" What kind of asinine plan was this man thinking? Maybe, Harry thought, the lemon drops rotted Dumbledore's brain. He knew he wasn't going to bind him to Voldemort, and he had a very bad feeling about who he was going to suggest.

"No, no my dear boy, I am sure we can find someone. Someone that will be able to protect you and love you in return. Now, why don't you give it some thought, and create a list of people. We will have the ceremony on Sunday. You give me a list of people by Wednesday, that is in two days. I will arrange everything."

This was his plan to prevent him from being married to Voldie? He wanted him married to someone else? Someone, judging from the old fool's words, wouldn't be his age. "I don't want to get married, bonded, engaged or anything." Harry wasn't going to let his man ruin his life. He had done that enough, by sending him back to the Dursleys every year.

"Harry, you want to be bonded to Voldemort?"

"I don't want to be bonded to anyone. Don't intentions count? If I resisted?" He wanted to hex the man. It's magic, there had to be ways to prevent this. He didn't know much about marriage contracts, but he did know that a lot of purebloods had them, and they were binding, so why not go that route?

"Sadly, we don't know what bond he might consider using. He is very skilled in the Dark Arts and he might use one of the older, illegal ones that don't need anyone's consent. There were a lot of bonds that forced two enemies to bind together to settle a war."

Harry wanted to dance, the man just gave him the perfect solution. He kept his eyes down, he didn't want the old fool to read about his new plan. "Fine." Harry sulked. "Anything else?" He had a lot of planning to do, a lot of research, and not a lot of time.

"No, just have a list by Wednesday."

Wednesday:

"Master Harry Potter." Dobby popped into the ROR. Dobby had been keeping everyone away from his Master.

"Yes, Dobby?" Harry lowered the book he was reading. He was actually surrounded by books, parchment, and his notes. He needed to start gathering supplies.

"It's Wednesday. They be looking for you still."

Harry didn't even hide his disgust at what Dumbledore and those in the Order were willing to do. Since it didn't affect them, it wasn't a big deal to them. He was going to make sure they learned their lesson. "Can you take me to outside of the Headmaster's office?"

"Yes. Harry Potter want me to keep room from use?"

"No. I have everything. I will have the next part of the instructions for you and Winky before Sunday tonight. We have a lot of work left to do, and I don't want Dumbledore to get any ideas."

"Harry, I was getting worried." Dumbledore gave him a slight smile.

Harry knew that smile was as fake as the twinkling eyes. He wondered if the man ever thought about what he did for the "greater good" and if the man ever felt guilty about it. "I am fine. I don't have a list. There is no one I want to bond too." Harry already refused the lemon drops. He knew the old coot carried the undoctored lemon drops in his left pocket, maybe it was time to have Dobby switch them around, maybe give him the truth serum ones for a day and see what happens. He wondered if they could arrange it to happen during a trip to the Ministry or Wizengamot session.

"Well, that isn't a problem. I have the perfect person in mind and I know the two of you will make a fine couple. Mrs. Weasley is arranging the ceremony. Miss Granger and Mr. Weasley have picked out the dress robes for you."

"Excuse me? They what?" Harry was seething. He knew Granger and Weasley weren't the best of friends, but he honestly thought they would have at least supported him. He knew Mrs. Weasley always supported Dumbledore. He knew that during his second year when she ignored the twins about the bars on his window.

"Well, we wanted to make sure everything was ready in time for Sunday. The flowers, the food, even the decorations are all set."

Harry glared but didn't comment. Oh, he was going to enjoy his plan. "Is there anything else?"

"No, just be ready for Sunday."

Harry stood up. He was going to be ready for Sunday, he wondered if everyone else would. He resisted the urge to do an evil laugh. He hoped he could get pictures of the special day.

Sunday:

Harry walked into the Great Hall. He wasn't surprised by the crowd gathered. Dumbledore had made sure to announce his wedding to everyone. He wondered if the wedding really needed to be in the paper for the last three days. They even posted pictures of him walking around Hogwarts, with the captions of "who caught Harry Potter's heart" and below would be pictures of people he had been seen talking with or even sitting next too. Granger and Weasley were so helpful in pointing out the different people Harry might be interested in. He wanted to hex the whole lot of them.

Dumbledore was at the other end of the Great Hall, where the ceremony was to take place. Once Harry reached the ritual table with two candles lite, Dumbledore grinned. "Lovely, now as we are now gathered here, we can begin."

He wondered where his new bride was. No one was stationed next to him. He wondered what Dumbledore did. Harry ignored him and turned to face the crowd. "Eager for a wedding? Does it matter to any of you that I don't want to get married? That I wasn't even consulted on who I was to marry?"

No one said anything. Dumbledore started. "We are here to unite-"

"I see. Well, this makes it easier for me." Harry waved his hand and everyone was frozen. "Nice spell that. It will keep everyone here as witnesses. Now for the other groom." Harry pulled out his wand and began a long Latin chant, and soon a form appeared in the room. People would have started to scream and run if they weren't already frozen in place. "Now we can begin the wedding." Harry gave them a huge grin.

Harry moved Voldemort next to Dumbledore. Once that was done, he pulled out two bonding bands, laid them on the ritual table, tossing the two gold rings aside. He pulled out a few more things for the ritual, including an old black leather bound book, laid it down, opened it to where there was a piece of parchment serving as a bookmarker. He faced Dumbledore and Voldemort and pulled a hair from each of them. He twisted the two hairs together, laid the hair down in a bowl, next to his items. He began a long chant in Latin, dropping different potions and herbs into the same bowl the hair was in. After he finished the chant, a puff of smoke arose from the bowl. Harry picked up his wand, and using magic, added the two bands into the bowl. He began another chant. When his chant was finished, he laid down his wand. He removed the two bands from the bowl, laid them end to end, forming a huge circle. He did the third chant, and everyone saw magic bind the bands together, forming one band. After the magic passed over the linked bands, Harry used his wand and began another long, complicated pattern of wand waving. Soon the bands were on Voldemort and Dumbledore. "You may kiss your husband." Harry lowered his wand, ending all the spells.

"What did you do, Potter?" Voldemort was the first one to recover.

Harry wasn't really surprised that Voldemort would recover first; the man was a powerful wizard, as Dumbledore looked shocked. "Well, since you both seemed so eager for a bonding ceremony I decided you each would get what you wanted. Dumbledore wanted the bonding to end the war, and from the crowd gathered and their lack of concern that I didn't want to be married, they also wanted the war to end. You didn't want to worry about me, the prophecy, or Dumbledore. Since the war was between the two of you, I just cut down the cost to the ones who were getting in your way; you know the ones who came here to watch a bonding. The ritual I used, if you look down on the band and see the runes, assures that neither of you will try to kill the other. It also includes that love aspect that Dumbledore likes to run on about. He claims you never had anyone to love you, well now you do, Albus Dumbledore Riddle will love you. Dumbledore, you finally get someone in your life to tell you to mind your own business and stop meddling in the affair of others, as you will be busy enough trying to control Tom Riddle Dumbledore. We, the rest of the wizarding world, get peace and hopefully a decent DADA professor that will last longer than a year." Harry smirked and walked down the aisle and out the doors of the Great Hall.

Severus and Lucius exchanged a look and started laughing. "He just out Slytherin them." The rest of the hall was starting gossiping about what they just witnessed.

Dobby appeared in the Great Hall. "Time to leave for your honeymoon."

"Honeymoon?" Dumbledore and Voldemort looked sickened at the very idea.

"Yes, for the next three months, you will be on a quiet island. You be happy there, everything all taken care of. Master Harry made sure of it. You be returned after Cupid's Day." Dobby grabbed them and popped out of the Great Hall before either man could object or anyone else could interfere. Not that it appeared that anyone else was about to interfere. If anything, everyone seemed happy the two idiots were gone.

Severus started laughing so hard he had tears coming out of his eyes, Lucius was wiping his own eyes. "Three months without either of those two nutters around." Severus finally muttered.

"We need to go and find Mr. Potter."

"I agree." Severus still couldn't believe that Potter pulled the ultimate Slytherin move on two Slytherins, one who would deny it to his death that he was a pure Gryffindor.

They found Harry packing his stuff up in Gryffindor Tower. "I take it they are on their honeymoon?" Harry didn't even look up from his packing.

"Yes, Dobby took them. Can you explain what we just witnessed?" Severus asked.

"Let me ask you a question, were you required to get new dress robes?"

"Yes."

"Did it make you wonder why no one was named when it was announced I was getting married?"

"I will kill him." Severus snapped as he realized what Harry was saying. He was going to make the man suffer through some serious bout of stomach flu.

"You mean he wanted the two of you to bond and didn't plan on telling Severus until right before the ceremony? He really is nutters." Lucius stated. "Well, Mr. Potter, you have my and I am certain, every single Death Eater's sincere thanks for ending the war." Now maybe his fellow Death Eaters could start having children, especially since Voldemort was going to have to deal with Dumbledore.

"I just wanted them out of my life. Now, I have to figure out where to go to avoid the backlash of marriage proposals once this gets out. I just want to study and get my NEWTs. I don't want to be an Auror like Dumbledore planned on me being, and I certainly don't want to marry anyone he might suggest."

"I believe I can help with that." The two former Death Eaters made plans with the Gryffindor.

1 Sept. 1999

"Mr. Riddle, how are you feeling?" Poppy asked as everyone was avoiding the grouchy former Dark Lord.

Voldemort snarled. "Albus, this is all your fault."

Harry put up a silencing charm. Most of the school knew the routine by now. Voldemort was pregnant thanks to a potion that Dumbledore slipped into his food. Voldemort made the man pay for that for weeks and still was in a lot of ways. Voldemort wasn't happy about being pregnant, he wanted a child, but he hated being pregnant. Harry felt his hand squeezed. "Are you alright?"

"Yes, just a bit off this morning. Severus already gave me a potion." Lucius was sitting between Severus and Harry. They had been bonded for a year. Harry was now the DADA Professor, Severus the Potion Master and taught NEWT level potions, while Draco was starting his apprenticeship, and the Weasley twins would teach OWL and below. Lucius was the Political Science professor. It was a compromise between Dumbledore and Voldemort in regards to Hogwarts and the student's education. One of the many compromises that Hogwarts had to survive. Harry wondered how often the Dumbledore had to buy new robes, and he appeared to have gotten very good at growing his hair back.

"I said no, Albus." Voldemort broke the silencing charm.

"Students I believe it's time for the first slot to start." Minerva stood up and together the staff worked on getting everyone away from Dumbledore, who still hadn't learned to not meddle, but Voldemort was teaching him, as they heard a yelp from Dumbledore.

The staff and students always enjoyed how Voldemort would hex, jinx and prank Dumbledore. Dumbledore was a very slow learner. "You know I still need to thank you for marrying those two." Severus pulled his husband into their quarters.

"So do I." Lucius closed the door.

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